[center]Collab between finalcatharsis and Exit
Part V[/center]

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Daniel remained silent, just as Abel had done earlier when he was the one pouring his heart out. He shook his head when the man apologized for being the way he was about religion. Daniel had gotten much worse responses from people before. Plus, he went to seminary in New York City. You didn't live in a city like that for three years without gaining a bit of perspective on peoples different beliefs. Daniel had never been an evangelist. He realized from a young age that you couldn't force or talk someone into faith. It was a path each individual had to walk on their own.

As Abel continued speaking, Daniel leaned back in his chair, taking a few more swigs of wine when he got the notion. Abel was slow to divulge the details. Daniel found himself staring at the man with a blank look on his face as he went on. It seemed like a story straight out of a suspense novel. The blank expression took. He wasn't sure how to react to what he was hearing. Not twenty minutes ago they were talking about 'ugly people.' Abel knew what 'ugly' was well before the end.

The priest thought back to a confession he had taken in his first year of seminary. The feeling of astonishment was almost the same. He got hot and sweaty. His clothes felt constricting. His heart felt like it was expanding. Just like back then, it was hard to find the words... at first. [b]Unlike[/b] last time, Daniel himself had now been face to face with his own darkness.

"You lived up to your name then. You became the shepherd... out of necessity. The first." Daniel refilled the chalice. "That is really fucked up though..." He had to admit it, and this wasn't the time or place for laughter, but he chuckled anyway. Maybe the wine had made him a little goofy. After that, he felt the urge to change the subject. "So where were you when all this happened then?" Someone like him... it wasn't a surprise he had been around this long. He had learned to do what he needed to do, right?

Abel, through the thickening fog around him, could still feel the surprise welling up from... somewhere... in the back of his head he assumed. He'd just shared the one moment that had changed everything for him... the moment that defined who or what he'd become and yet the man had simply told him that he'd lived up to his name. Maybe it had something to do with the the fact he'd managed to get a grip of himself somewhere in the middle of his confession, remind himself of the things he was going to say and filter out what didn't need to be shared. It was necessary... necessary because his brother was still standing in the room and although the body was motionless, a finger had found a way in front of his pursed lips, his eyes abnormally wide as shot him a silencing gesture.

How was Daniel supposed to react to the fact that they'd eaten the bodies to get rid of them? That everytime his parents forced him to go to church, everytime communion came around he literally remembered everything... it was grape juice when he was younger but the effect was the same. He was drinking the blood of Christ... that he may be forgiven... But... there was no forgiveness for this. He remembered being repulsed by the little circular wafers as it sat waiting in his hand. He didn't want to put it in his mouth as if eating it would make him visible... naked. Like God would know what he'd done. His brother never seemed to mind on the other hand. He scarfed the stuff down seeing them as nothing more than mid sermon snacks. As he grew older... he did what he had to do... he succumb to the change... embraced it. He drank His blood and partook in the body. Maybe that's what he was put on the Earth to do... Eat and remember... and be forgiven. He tried to focus that energy... use it for good if he could... somehow. Everyone he ate was a criminal, rapist... pedophile... at one point it was another cannibal. He'd partake in their body but in such a way that it was... respectful? He'd remember them for who they were. He'd dine on his finest china over an exquistie wooden table used for nothing else. He'd hang pictures of their faces around their remains on his plate... 

It wasn't until his brother called him about someone he'd murdered that things changed. He was erasing innocent people... The woman from the meeting who had nearly lost her father. She'd tried to find comfort in him, in his brother and he killed her.

Lost in his thoughts, he almost didn't hear the next question.

[b]"New York."[/b] He was relieved beyond slurred words that the conversation had taken a turn in a different direction. His head was already hurting with with memories he'd been trying to supress. [b]"I lived up there once upon a time. Had a job and a fa-"[/b] He stopped. There it was again, the effects of the wine and the feeling of catching himself. [b]"future... until all this."[/b] His head wobbled around itself, his hands doing the same as he pointed at everything. He chuckled, staring out through the door at the opposite walls of the church. It was quiet in here... quiet and safe. [b]"Sure do wish I had one of these to hole up in..."[/b] He paused for a second before shooting another question. [b]"What about you? You come straight here when it all went to shit?... I'd imagined everyone else did..."[/b]

His bottle was now almost three quarters empty.

Daniel took off his sweater and hung it on the back of his chair. Even with no heat in the church, he felt his skin getting hot, and he was sure his cheeks were getting rosey. "New York, huh?" The priest felt obligated to elaborate on that. "I went to seminary in Manhattan." He looked down at his lap and smiled a bit recalling memories of his time there... his friends, his teachers, the girls... and then the smile faded. He'd never speak to or see any of those people ever again. "It's a great city." At least compared to the middle-of-nowhere, Kentucky.

In between Abel's phrases he continued to drink until he discovered the half bottle was empty. He looked to the third, unopened bottle. Would it be too much to open it and share? He wondered.... it was kind of, sort of a celebration, right? Four months without seeing anyone alive. While their meeting had gotten off to a little bit of a rocky start, it seemed to be going pretty well now. As well as could be expected, anyway.

"Yeah... it uh... worked out well. And for someone like me with absolutely no survival skills... well, it was a miracle." Dan put his hands to the back of his neck and unclasped his collar, afterward setting it on the table to the side. He looked at the third bottle again and bit his bottom lip a tad. He smiled, wondering how ridiculous he sounded. Everyone always said that when he got drunk or angry, his accent tended to exaggerate.

"It's not so much I CAME here... just WAS here. The head priest was on sabbatical, so I was in charge. Had only been workin' here about six months." He ran his right index finger up and down the edge of the table in front of him. "My family... we had plans to meet after everything settled down, but it never did..." It was just a fact of life at this point. "And I thought I was needed here, so I just stayed. Lots of people came. Never seen so many people in this church before that... the basement... used to be wall to wall with food and water. Was a food bank." He wondered again how stupid he must be sounding, not for his accent this time, but for the fact he was admitting he hadn't done what most 'ugly' people would have done. Before that fifth month, he couldn't have been considered ugly at all.

"But hungry people... hungry families and children needed it so... I guess in a way it made me feel needed too." He sighed. "Pretty stupid, I reckon... to give it all away like that." He unbuttoned the top button on his collar to give himself some breathing room. "The fourth month I saw the last people. Then the fifth... well..." Abel already knew what happened then. "And since then it's just been me... and my instruments."

Abel smiled a little. His drink was slowly taking over, wanting to do most of the thinking and talking for him but he was still coherent enough to agree with Daniel's generosity. [b]"Ya... pretty stupid."[/b] He chuckled. [b]"I don't know though... Nine months with all this food in one place... maybe you weren't alone."[/b] Abel didn't know what he was saying but for some reason it felt right. How else did this man survive for so long like he had?

[b]"Just you and... God... and instruments..."[/b]

[i][center]...Instruments...[/i][/center]

Abel couldn't remember the last time he'd heard any kind of music. The only sounds he listened to from day to day were the suffering of those around him... the moans of the dead, the grumbling in people's stomach... the screams of pain when differences were being settled. He almost couldn't remember what a note sounded like when played. He closed his eyes trying to recall the song of the organ at his church. There'd been a piano set up to the side as well and every now and then much more contemporary music would be played. Strings, percussion, everyone's voice echoing across walls. He opened his eyes. They fell on the guitar propped against the wall.

[b]"You still play?"[/b]

Daniel laughed when Abel agreed with him. He wondered now in hindsight if he would have done it all again the same way. "God. Now there's the big question..." His voice trailed off with the last few words. God being around... it was something he'd been questioning a lot lately. Circumstances made him wonder if everything was chance. His education told him it was all fate... but he didn't know yet if he could accept that. Surely God hadn't meant for all of this to happen? 

When he saw Abel's eyes look at the guitar he couldn't help but glance back at it as well. Then the question. Maybe the most important question of all for Daniel. "What do you think?" He grinned and scooted his chair back. He reached for the guitar, laid it on its side then removed it from the case. He stood up too fast and lost his balance for a few moments. "Come on. It sounds a lot better out there." He nodded his head back to signal at the sanctuary. One thing he always loved about the place were the acoustics. Most music sounded amazing in there.

Dan pulled the strap over his head and settled it between his shoulders. He began to tune it on the way back out. It didn't take much, since he played it regularly. The priest walked over to the altar and pushed himself up on to it. Normally, he wouldn't have let anyone see him doing something [b]that[/b] sac-religious, but... who even cared at this point? Abel certainly wouldn't.

Abel got up to follow, grabbing the bottle of wine before realizing that it was almost completely empty. He tilted it in his hands, watching what was left of the liquid swirl around inside the glass. There had been many rules he'd given himself when the dead began to rise one of which forbade him to drink. He never knew when he'd needed to use his head to stay alive and if things ever went south when he was drunk out of his mind, he'd be as good as dead. It seemed somewhere along the way, he'd forgotten that one rule. He set the bottle back down realizing that the damage had been done. Already he'd been saying things he didn't mean to say and following Daniel through the door of the sacrisity was hard in and of itself. He quickly found a seat on the inside of the second row of pews, his wet clothes taking up the space in front of him.

Once Abel was settled on the pew, Daniel started to play... but things didn't sound quite right at first. [i]Come on man. You've played with a buzz before.[/i] "Well, this is one of my favorites to play when I've been drinking." The priest giggled. He was a little embarrassed because he hadn't played for anyone in so long... but eventually the notes and words came to him. "Don't wish it away, don't look at it like iit's forever..." A few more verses in and he felt like he was at home again. "And I guess that's why they caaall it the bluuees." This was one of the few things that still felt right in his world. It was good for his soul.

Abel listened... listened intently. He recognized the song immediately: A song by Elton John titled "I Guess That's Why They Call it the Blues". It sounded different inside the walls of the church. The soft strumming of the guitar... Daniel's voice. Closing his eyes, it felt as if each note, each syllable was coming from somewhere deep inside him. There was this song gushing forth like a fountain, pouring out of him... it was soft and strong at the same time and while Daniel played, it was all he could think about. The lines, the melody brought him back to a life before when he heard the song play. Driving down a quiet road, late at night on the roof of his apartment, early mornings during a walk... on his own. He'd always been by himself, left alone to muse over his thoughts... but tonight he was in the company of another... and he smiled. It wasn't forced... or fake. He'd become so good at masking himself behind a good smile. This one however was... content. He was content that he'd found someone... someone to remind him that their used to be life in the world. That there used to be real people... people that were kind and gentle and perhaps... there were still people like that around. He had to believe that... The song washing over him, wrapping itself around him was real... the man playing, singing. That man was real... the generosity he'd shown was real. Maybe the world before had been real too and maybe it was still out there somewhere.

Abel held the smile, his eyes still closed as he lost himself in the words of Elton John. He drifted with the music, let it carry him in it's arms and slowly bring him back down to earth as the song came to an end. Daniel voiced the final words from somewhere and strummed the final notes. When he'd finally stopped playing, there was this gentle silence in the room. It wasn't awkward or abrupt but very... very peaceful. 

When the last note settled in the air and string stopped vibrating, Daniel finally looked up. In additon to Abel, he saw several other people out there in the pews... his parents, sister, friends, colleagues, parishioners. He smiled at them all.

[b]"Beeeautiful..."[/b] Abel's slurred voice finally broke the silence. His eyes were still closed, his head now resting on the back of the pew in front of him, his chin resting atop his crossed forearms. It was a posture he'd taken up in church as a child. He'd sit like that... close his eyes during the music and just imagine being somewhere else. He'd remain like that... until his "mother" told him to sit up.

The priest hopped down from the altar to take a bow. "Why, thank you!" He laughed. Clearly Abel had had a bit too much to drink. "Now, the next one is very near to my heart." He giggled again, though he was about to play a pretty depressing song. Seeing the faces of his family, he couldn't help himself. Daniel didn't attempt to get back up, just leaned back and began to strum. "In the deeep daaark hills of Eastern Kentucky, that's the place--"

Dan cut himself off when he heard something rumble through the air outside. He strummed a few more notes, but eventually that trailed off too. It took him a few seconds to piece everything together, but when he realized what that sound was, he froze. He brought his head up again to look at Abel. The look on his face said everything. Fear, dread. Those memories were fighting their way back into his head... and anxiety washed over him. He remembered the conversation he overheard before the killing. Had the group finally come looking for their three missing thugs?

"Did you hear that?"