Dearest Comrade Companions of the IDRB,

This will likely be my last address to you. We have received threats from our enemies of retaliatory strikes against all major cities on the impact of our 'Slow Bombs'. The Council in their wisdom have activated the ODIN artificial intelligence to commence firing immediately. For your own protection: stay inside, stock up on essentials and be ready to defend your homes. We will see you on the other side.

Thank you for your understanding, and long live the Independent Democratic Republic of Bed!
Long live!