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Current Finding good lines from your older RPs and seeing your current writing ability shining through in its early stages is such a good feeling.
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I love when I feel motivated to write so much 😍🥰
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All my recent RP's are in PM's so if any of my old writing pals are checking out my page make sure to hit me up 'cause I'm still here!
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IM BAAAAAAACK!!!!!!
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I have this problem where I don't even remember what I'm typing seconds after I've typed the words? I literally always have to go back and read my own post afterwards to know what the hell's going on.
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Bio

Hey guys! I'm Aces Away, you can call me Ace or Aces!

I was a member of Roleplayerguild before that crash or whatever where all our stuff was erased. I've been RPing since I was like...I think about 13 or so. I'm 26 currently.

Most Recent Posts

We made it kids
I totally missed this going up D:


Timestamp: Tuesday July 21st, Evening. After: Return To Sin


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Mordechai stared out the windshield from the passenger side of Creed and Jokes’ black 2008 Toyota Highlander, a car that he knew well not only as a passenger but as someone who’d personally put work into it back when he was employed at Phil’s the first time around. When Jokes had come back to the motel to pick up Mordechai and Allegra at the end of their shift, the petite woman had announced her intention to walk home to the James house alone while Mordechai returned to base to hand in the money. He’d wanted to protest, but her tone brooked no room for argument and she had been switching moods constantly in the past few hours since their encounter with Rey Rey, meaning he wanted her out of his hair just as much as she wanted to be home with the kids. He also didn’t want to be there when she showed up at home and Lacey saw the wound on her new interest’s face. So, once she passed the weapons check she was on her way, and Mordechai was struck with the realization that Allegra was able to navigate her way home on her own like a pro. Like she’d been here for years instead of less than two months. He hadn’t doubted her when she said earlier that she made her rounds to threaten his friends, but the confidence as she headed straight towards the direction of the James household just proved it all the more.

“I spy with my little eye,” Jokes broke through his wandering thoughts with a playful tone and a smirk on his face, pulling the car to a park in the Edge of Sin parking lot. “A stormy cloud ta most but a source’a light for you.”

“What the fuck kinda open mic poetry shit was that?” Mordechai replied, raising an eyebrow at the other man who simply continued to grin back, giving no answer but nodding for him to look back out the window. The tired man followed his gaze and his heart skipped a beat as he saw Sonny leaning against the brick wall near the back exit, head ducked down with a blunt between his lips and his hands cupped around his lighter to protect the lit frame from the breeze. “Oh,” Mordechai muttered dumbly as Jokes’ little riddle actually filtered through. “Sunshine.”

“Yeah, your little Sunshine, he makes ya happy when skies are gray,” The man laughed at his own joke.

“...What?”

“Nothin’,” Jokes replied back with an exaggerated sigh at the missed reference, well used to it by now with most of his crew. The blank spots in many of their upbringings became rather apparent during any of his reference heavy comedy, so he’s always quick to give up on that and move along to something else. Besides, ever since they were kids Mordechai always responded best when you just cut to the chase. “Go talk ta him, Boa, it’s been long enough.”

“I know,” Mordechai responded immediately, nothing in his tone but acceptance. Sonny was blowing the smoke out now and scanning the parking lot, and while he could see the car parked on the other side of the lot, the faded daylight meant he couldn’t see the two men inside. Mordechai was taking advantage of that to get a good look at him- or as good as he could at this distance- before finally approaching him for the first time since he shoved him away at 13 Carlisle, right across the street from where they were right now.

He looked exhausted, like his leaning against the wall was the only thing actually keeping him up…like a part of him had stayed down ever since Mordechai had shoved him away and he hit the ground hard. His typically stubbornly squared shoulders were drooping as the smoke worked its way through his system, but Mordechai had been reading that body with ease for most of his life and he could feel guilt swirling in his gut at the evidence of how his lashing out had affected the man he’d always loved.

He wondered if Sonny had been eating properly, he always forgot to when he was upset, That tended to make him even crankier with people of course and-

“Mordechai,” Jokes sighed once more, tearing him from his procrastinating, and Mordechai’s gaze snapped to him at the use of his full name. Jokes was staring at him patiently, one arm tossed over the wheel while he leaned back against the door. He wondered for a moment if Creed would keep the former captain in the car for a bit longer and try to impart some wisdom or help psych him up. In the end though, it was never really Jokes’ style unless he and Creed were working off of each other. He shook his head fondly and then made sure the younger man could see his face as he smiled to show his support, giving him a stern, “Go. Now.”

“...Yessir…” The paler of the two replied, knowing not to argue when Jokes stopped joking. The sound of the door closing behind him as he slung the cash bag over his shoulder echoed damningly through the parking lot and it snapped Sonny’s gaze back over to him, this time without the protection of darkened glass to hide him. His green eyed mirror went tense and the hand holding the blunt slowly dropped as he pinched out the cherry before stuffing the roach in his pocket along with his now balled up fist. Step by step, he got closer to Sonny, and with each step it was like the other man was turning to stone before him. By the time Mordechai got to him, the shorter man was practically vibrating in place and his glower was becoming more twisted and upset by the second. Any practice he’d imagined for this encounter flew out of his head and they were left standing in tense silence while the music beating in the Edge bled through the brick and metal of the building. Unsure of what else to do in the face of Sonny’s silent rage, Mordechai decided to leap straight into the trenches and took a shaky breath before going to speak.

“I-”

“Sonny! Did you take my last wrap you assho- oh, uh,” Zion stopped dead in his tracks, half hanging out the back door as his eyes landed on Mordechai and then his adoptive brother. He was absolutely unprepared to deal with all the unresolved issues now standing in front of him, and the idea of forgiving Sonny for stealing his wrap and just getting the fuck out of there was suddenly very appealing. Unable to really look right at Mordechai and not daring to keep his eyes on Sonny after the glance he’d gotten at his surly mug, Zion opted for the safest option and went to stare over the other jew’s shoulder into the shadows he currently wished would sequester him away, which is when he noticed the bag hanging off of it and quickly formed his plan of retreat. “Hey man, uh, welcome back…” His voice cracked and went out at the end, how fucking mortifying. God if Danny were here he would have laughed- nope. No. “Yo-you need me to bring that in?”

“Hey, yeah that’d be great,” Mordechai greeted carefully, unsure about the younger boy’s rather subdued reaction to him. The kid used to follow him around just like Danny and Conan had, sometimes dragging poor Topanga along just because she was hanging with them that day. They’d all been quite close before Conan was lost, which had caused Zion to cling tighter to the two best friends he had left, as well as those he’d claimed as older brother figures. Topanga had snapped at him over his clinginess multiple times in those months, but Danny had needed all the physical closeness he could get, desperate for the warmth and love of the friends he had left after losing the other side of his coin. But then they’d lost Danny too, and then Mordechai had left without so much as a ‘see ya kid’. To top it all off, Zion wasn’t even at the den when Mordechai had first returned and reunited with most of the crew, so this was their first time seeing each other again. The whole time, really just a few seconds but god did they drag, Sonny was glaring a hole into his head and frowning something fierce. The air couldn’t be any tenser. Eager to get one thing out of the way, or two if he were including Zion’s presence in this, he dropped the bag into his hand and handed it off to the younger boy, calling out an awkward thanks after his abruptly retreating form that was cut off by the slamming door. Sighing as he added a mental note to check on that later, Mordechai brought his full attention back to a seethingly silent Sonny. His demeanor only seemed to worsen at his little brother’s noisy and swift retreat, and Mordechai was feeling less and less sure about this with every second he was pinned by the other man’s gaze.

“I’m sorr-”

Not wanting to hear whatever was about to come out of Mordechai’s mouth, Sonny cut him off with a sharp and challenging tone. “Jesus ya just gonna gloss over that? Stow the confusion ta get this over with sooner? Fuck that,” He bit out, keeping his unblinking eyes locked on the other with lifelong knowledge of how much he hated it. ”D’ya even know why Zi won’t look at ya? D’ya fuckin’ care?”

“I’m sorry, what?” Mordechai asked, wildly thrown off guard by Sonny’s interruption. He was right, of course, that he’d had a set apology in his head and he hadn’t been planning to approach the Zion thing now, though of course he’d clocked it. But it looked like Sonny was choosing indignation on behalf of his little brother in order to vent his frustration before Mordechai even got a chance to talk. Not surprising as he’s always been better at fighting for someone else instead of himself, something that the two of them have forever shared in common. Emotions were confusing, but anger was always so clear to them as it was the first one they can recall ever seeing growing up. In front of him, Sonny’s stance was rigid and his fists were still balled up in his pocket, but his eyes were piercing Mordechai’s own as if daring him to try and ignore him. Mordechai could never ignore him, not again. So, much to his chagrin at the prolonged tense situation, it looked like they were going to talk about Zion.

I’m so fuckin’ tired of talkin’...

“Ya know he’s got that abandonment shit fuckin’ up his head,” Sonny hissed, more than willing to break it down for him and drag it out. More than willing to make Mordechai as uncomfortable as him being suddenly cornered by said man was. If you’re cornered and you couldn’t get away, you turn it around on the other person, make them sweat. “Ya never even tried ta talk ta him since ya got back, and that kid’s not gonna go handin’ ya a needle just ta make ya happy like I would so I don’t care what your baby mama said-”

"Sunshine I wasn't-"

"Shut the fuck up!” Rage echoed through the parking lot, cracking sharply against the brick and concrete around them before a strong breeze took any lingering noise away on its currents. Sonny’s face was red and his chest was rising and falling like he’d just crossed the finish line. “It's been about you! I'm talkin' now!"

Mordechai's mouth clicked shut.

“Ya better fix this shit with him soon, hear me? He’s been havin’ nightmares and been cryin’ in his sleep since ya blew back in'a town and ya haven’t even fuckin’ thought’a him!” Disgust and contempt clouded Sonny’s face, the mere look feeling like a slap to Mordechai’s own, but Sonny wasn’t done. “Ya do remember him, right? You were the one that found ‘im and convinced ‘im ta trust Lacey, ya treated him like another little brother, he was best friends with your real little brother. Hell, he lost CT and then Danny within a year, and then not only do ya leave but he and Rye’s family were the only ones that knew what was needed for Danny’s funeral, so he had ta help Phil where you were too weak to!!”

Mordechai had taken a step back before he stood stock still, eyes wide as Sonny lashed out at him with everything he’d never been able to say for the past two years, his voice one step away from a growl and lips pulled back in an angry sneer. His eyes were wild with rage but steady on Mordechai’s own, unwavering amidst his tirade. Mordechai waited a beat before opening his mouth, but Sonny surged forward and in an even more aggressive manner than his sister from earlier, balled his fists up tight in the collar of Mordechai’s shirt, jerking him in close to his face. Just like his sister, Sonny would never lash out in a way that actually hurt Mordechai or triggered him to a pure panic state, the Cernis siblings always more tactful and aware than people quite realize, but that didn’t mean the threat being contained in his body language wasn’t evident. That didn’t change the fact that Sonny’s tightly coiled fists were one twist from cutting Mordechai’s airway off or that his head was one rock forward from breaking his nose. It didn’t stop Mordechai from thinking of all the violent things that he knew Sonny could do, had seen him do to others, but it also didn't stop him from knowing that the man- with more restraint than people would ever know of- could do anything to harm him but never would. He would certainly have never shoved him away to the dirt and left him like Mordechai had done to Sonny.

“Not. Done.” Mordechai swallowed thickly and nodded, heart rate picking up quickly as the pulse in his throat beat harshly against Sonny’s fist. “That’s him. Deal with that later. But me?” A humorless laughed escaped his lips, something so raw and pained that it stabbed at his heart, and Mordechai reached shaky hands up to cover Sonny’s fists. For whose comfort, he didn't quite know anymore. He looked into his storming sage eyes and saw him briefly falter at the contact before throwing his walls back up all in a single instant. Sonny shook him slightly, as if reminding both Mordechai and himself of what was happening here. “I shoved my shit down ‘cause I was just so fuckin’ happy that ya came back ta us, and ya looked half a step away from joinin’ Danny in the grave so I couldn’t bare ta ask anythin’ too real. I didn’t ask everythin’ I wanted, and there was so fuckin’ much. Like, ‘why cut all contact but I find out you an’ Badger still talked?’ or ‘How the fuck did Nolan fuckin’ MacCullum qualify for your phone number but not me? Why is he what finally brought ya back and not me?’”

They were locked in a staring match and neither was willing to look away. The delicate moment held between their gazes paused everything around them and froze their sight to each others’. This means that Mordechai saw the moment Sonny’s resolve shattered behind his eyes like the most fragile of stained glass, breaking as he did. The slightly smaller man took a shuddering breath in before continuing. “And of course, of course there was, ‘why didn’t ya take me with you?’ The grip on his collar released as Sonny shifted his hands until his and Mordechai’s fingers were interlaced between their rapidly beating hearts, and he clasped tightly while using their combined fists to beat a pathetically light objection against the taller’s chest before tears finally drowned out the rage in his eyes as he desperately claimed, voice cracking, “‘Cause fuck, Mob, I would’a gone with you. I would’a gone anywhere with ya, any time, always.

“I know ya would’a,” Mordechai whispered hoarsely. “You’re my Sunshine after all, you’ve always been my Sunshine,” his own tears burning at his eye as he dropped his forehead to press it against Sonny’s, not bothering to stop the light hammering against his chest. He deserved everything Sonny had to throw at him and more. The current captain's frame was shaking from a definite combination of rage and an age-old exhaustion, and the former already knew that nothing he could say would really be enough, but that didn’t mean he wasn’t going to say anything. Sonny deserved more.

More than anyone else in his life, this man has been there with him from almost the very start. Sonny’s nickname was Sunshine because he was that to Decky and no one else, because when they were younger Sonny lit up Decky’s life and made sure he kept it alight from there on out. He was Decky’s beacon, burning bright and hot. And like the moon, Mordechai soaked up and reflected Sonny’s rays, showing up as a softer form of the other man, the type that others could stare at without going blind. They may not be two souls born at the same time like Maliq and Jonie, but a five day difference is infinitesimal in comparison to the life they spent together and until Lanie, Sonny had always been the only person for him.

Monogamy had always been a challenge for Mordechai, and as Lanie was the first person to require it of him, it had been a new experience and he had quite the struggle adjusting to her expectations. He told himself that it made the most sense, that the courts would see a stable, normal relationship with a good girl from the right side of the tracks and that would prove to them that he was on the right path and could take care of his little brother too. Mordechai hadn't seen anything wrong with how he and Sonny still hung onto each other or fell asleep together after a long shift, but apparently with their history together that came too close to cheating in the blonde girl's eyes. Flirting was bordering the line of cheating even if things went no further. Every form of communication Mordechai felt like he was actually good at up until that point had suddenly been restricted. At the time, he didn't understand his frustration, because she was expecting normal things out of a normal relationship and he had never had one of those before so he had to learn to catch up, right? He just never seemed built for doing things the normal way, and the gossip had always been that he was raised to fail at everything he did. There were plenty of times when the gossip was right. Too many times.

But he'd tried to do right by Lanie. He tried to stop flirting in casual conversation and he strongly encouraged Sonny to take a shot with other people while he himself kept reeling with confusion over what he was supposed to do with all these different feelings whilst being in a monogamous relationship. Sonny had already been screwing around with Lexie during that time, and Decky had been hit with a confusing sense of loss he hadn't expected when he’d first been told. Things fell apart between those two just before junior year when the girl was shipped off to military school overnight, but even during all that, Sonny had been adamant that he and Mordechai worked better as a team when it came to life and love. While he never pressured the struggling teen to change his mind, he always let Mordechai know that his options were open. Sonny’s comments had gotten the other serpent thinking about things that would’ve been extremely disruptive to his way of life at the time. Before he was ready to figure those things out, summer had ended and senior year had started with, well, a bang, halting everything on all fronts for him as the person he was building his world for was torn away along with Mordechai’s will to build any type of life ever again.

But then he’d met Allegra, found out she was pregnant with Chai and got found by Mika, and then Phil had messaged him saying Nolan was in a bad way and giving him Mordechai’s new number was a last resort because Phil just couldn't handle seeing any more dead kids so soon. A new life that he’d barely started the foundation of was already invaded by his old one. Not that he’d trade anything if he had the chance, everything that happened led him back to this moment, back to his Sunshine. His Sunshine who’s tears were raining onto their joined hands.

“Then why?”

“Because you’re not just my Sunshine,” The answer was sad, resigned like he was on the day he’d first made the decision to leave. “You’re Lacey’s Sunny D, and admit it or not you’re Zi’s big brother. Leavin’ them would’a torn you up, and mix that with how fucked I was and how fucked I was plannin’ on gettin, I knew I would get ya killed or do somethin’ stupid like get ya hooked on H like your asshole parents all ‘cause I just couldn’t stop usin’,” Mordechai took a ragged breath in while Sonny, as always, stiffened at the mention of his and Lacey’s parents. Sonny had been clean of the shit ever since their forced detoxes in Juvie, but Mordechai could never stay away from it for too long. He always did believe that he took after his parents in the worst ways. “I know you, Sunshine, and the way I was livin’ would’ve killed ya in all’a the worst ways.”

“But I don’t care! I wanted you, Mob!” Sonny sobbed, finally collapsing against the other man, who immediately caught his weight and detangled their mash of fingers so he could properly hold his love up. “I wanted you! I wanted ta be there for ya and not only did ya not let me, ya left me!”

“I know,” He admitted near silently against the top of Sonny’s head, gazing brokenly at the dirty brick wall behind the slighter man. “I abandoned you.”

“You abandoned me!” Sonny parrotted before devolving into a bawling mess while Mordechai held him tightly, whispering apologies that he knew couldn’t actually heal the wound, but unable to truly mend what he’d torn in Sonny’s heart. The heart of the man he’d shared the most of his journey with outside his own brother, who knew every single one of his secrets and every skeleton in his closet just like Mordechai knew his. Mordechai held him close like doing it now could hold him together all the times he fell apart without him in these past two years. Likewise, Sonny clung to him like the second he let go Mordechai would fade into the ether like he’d never been there to begin with. Time stretched between the two as Sonny released all his pent up pain and distress, Mordechai taking it all in and doing his best not to start crying himself. Then, when the shaking had subsided a few minutes later, the door slammed open as Monarch came barreling out with her skateboard to head home for the night, Zion hot on her heels. Sonny shoved himself out of Mordechai’s hold and began violently scrubbing at his eyes and face, unaware of the hurt look that crossed Mordechai’s own features. The two minors witnessing the scene shared a long-suffering commiseratory look before they each shot off in their respective directions, Monarch’s skating far more graceful than that of Sonny’s adoptive brother.

“Sorry,” Mordechai whispered once the kids were gone and they were alone once more, taking the shove to mean that Sonny no longer wished to see him now that he got what little closure he could. He was an idiot for hoping he’d get another chance after how much he’d hurt him, but he’d been hopeful that they could at least try. Stupid. He turned around and took a step towards the exit of the lot, ready to go home and try not to cry himself to sleep while Allegra hounded him for details. “I’ll just g-”

“What the fuck are ya doin’?” Sonny’s tone was abrupt and scared, like a child whose parent was trying to leave them alone in the check out line, and suddenly there was a hand catching his wrist so tightly he felt his bones creak, forcing him back around while maintaining its hold. “Where are ya goin’? Y-ya can’t just leave me- leave after-”

“I’m sorry,” Mordechai repeated like a broken record. “I thought- ya shoved me an’ I just thought-”

“I was wipin’ my fuckin’ eyes ya goddamn drama queen,” Mordechai’s heart ached at the oxymoronic affectionate derision in Sonny’s tone, as if he had almost forgotten where Danny had learned it so well. “Christ. No, you’re comin’ home with me and we’re gonna talk and figure our shit out! I’m not lettin’ ya outta my sight for at least three more hours.”

“What? Why three hours?”

“Well, I mean…because ya got, like, kids ‘n’ shit,” Sonny replied stiltedly while looking down at the ground and scratching at his cheek in a move that Mordechai knew as bashful. His heart melted at both the sight and at Sunshine’s forethought into his home dynamic. “Gotta like…tuck ‘em in right? Read ‘em a story goodnight or somethin’.”

“Right,” Mordechai offered warmly. “Viva cries if I don’t read her The Worst Princess every night. Even had ta call in last night from Blue Hill ‘cause she was throwin’ a fit.”

“See,” Sonny nodded proudly to himself, everything decided. “Three hours, let's go.”

Mordechai let Sonny’s grip on his wrist pull him along as the current Captain of the Serpents led the former out of the lot and in the direction of the Lost Souls complex, well aware that the other man was done with such vulnerability in a semi-public place as the Edge of Sin backlot, and that he was using the change in location as an opportunity to reboot from everything that just happened and prepare for the deeper talk they’d be having soon. Mordechai was taking the time to do much the same, and as their strides synced up and they were walking side by side, Sonny tentatively changed his grip from around Mordechai’s wrist to take his hand in his own. Hope fluttered in both their chests as the spark that always seemed to shoot through them at contact came to life once more, assuring them that even if things haven’t been fully healed, their bond was still there. That meant that there was still a way for things to blossom between them again, and damn it if that wasn’t more than Mordechai could have ever hoped for.

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The shower pipes were just shuddering to a halt as Sunshine locked up behind them and dropped his keys on the small table by the door. Mordechai couldn’t help the surprise that crossed his face when he looked around the apartment and saw that the room was a mix of his own tastes and those of Lacey and Zion. Sonny’s shone through in a picture of the Boaz and Cernis siblings as kids and how his old acoustic rested against the wall by the tv. There was even a bookshelf holding all the comics they shared in childhood and the books that Mordechai and Danny had favored most over the years. He must have saved them when Danny and Decky’s apartment got cleaned out after Decky left. Lacey’s hair ties and small items were scattered around and the curtains had definitely been changed to her tastes, and Zion’s skateboard was by the door while the pull-out couch pushed against the far wall of the living room seemed to be permanently transitioned into its bed form, divided down the middle by pillows and a spare blanket. There was a smaller two seater couch in front of a low table between the pull-out and the kitchen, forcing the appearance of a living room in the connecting space while the real one acted as the second bedroom.

“Wait, do y’all all live together?” He asked, knowing Sonny to be rather minimalist and not leave his things around carelessly, and that the other two siblings were much the same when in other peoples’ space. ”I thought-”

“Shit’s complicated as always,” Sonny cut him off, pulling him further into the living space. His plan had been to move into his own apartment once he was out of the dorms, having spent most of his teens under the Edge’s roof, and last Mordechai had known before the shooting was that Sonny was looking into the apartment across the hall from his sister and younger brother. The apartment that Mordechai and Danny had moved into after his emancipation junior year, making that yet another thing that he screwed Sonny over on by leaving. “I went from the dorms straight to here and despite bitchin’ that I’m a lil’ bitch, Lace gets that stupid look in her eyes when I talk about movin’ in somewhere else, even on this floor. Sometimes I can’t stand bein’ in the same room as her though, I swear.”

“Right…” Yeah right. Mordechai thought in response to the paler man’s grumble. He could act all he wanted, even get as frustrated and loud with her in public as he wanted, but there never was and never will be any doubt from those that know him that Sonny loved his older sister and would never know what to do if she suddenly decided to stop reacting to him. As much as she was also an instigator, Lacey knew that Sonny couldn’t process his emotions the same way as other people, and that concern often showed as rage just as much as love seemed to show as irritation. Hearing the way to two talked to each other, you’d think them still living together would have become a murder scene, but Mordechai knew how much those two needed each other and to know where they were to feel safe and stable at all times, and that’s included Zion for nearly a decade now.

“Where the hell is she anyway…” Sonny grumbled to himself, having hoped she would be here to distract Zion while he talked to Mordechai.

“Lacey?” Mordechai asked, having heard him in the silence. At Sonny’s nod, he supplied, “She barged in on me at the James’ house and got roped in ta watchin’ the kids while Legs and I met up with R2 and started our first job.”

“She fuckin’ what?” Sonny stressed as he tossed his jacket over the backrest and sat down on the couch, leaning over the coffee table to pull an ashtray closer before he pulled out his blunt from earlier and lit it desperately, as if the harsher he inhaled the smoke the more ready he’d be for whatever the fuck was happening. And hell, Mordechai hadn’t even mentioned the revelation of him having more family or the disturbingly mutual flirtation between his baby mama and Sonny’s sister that he’d had to watch. Just thinking about it made him wish he’d had the forethought to smoke something himself, as one of the few vices left he was still allowed to indulge in, but before he could even swallow his pride and ask Sonny for a hit, the bathroom door finally creaked open to let the steam roll out while its inhabitant continued his routine, and Sonny silently slumped back into the couch and let out a large cloud of smoke from his lungs before running a tired hand down his face. “Whatever, go in ta Lace’s room while I send Zi after her.”

“What?”

The look Sonny gave him told him that the other man had no more patience for his stupidity today, and Mordechai did his best not to squirm under his gaze.

“He doesn’t wanna see ya, dumbass, and this is his home, so go in ta the bedroom and close the door so he can walk through his own livin’ room without gettin’ upset or jumpy.”

…Okay, fair enough. Mordechai made a beeline for the only other separate room in the apartment, the door clicking shut just as the one for the bathroom was fully opened. He couldn’t make out the words, but he listened to the muffled voices go back and forth for less than a minute before the slamming of the front door made him jump. The bedroom door swung open a second later and he could tell by the look on Sonny’s face that Zion hadn’t been all too happy to be sent back out after barely being home, especially with the reason being Mordechai’s presence. Everywhere he went he made a mess of things, even when actively trying to fix them. Danny was the only person he never did wrong by and he still couldn’t save him in the end. He still failed. This was all too much for a single day, he had to stop himself from spiraling over Zion right now and focus on Sonny and just Sonny and compartmentalize Zion until the younger boy was ready to let Mordechai talk to him. Alright. Here we go.

He followed the other man back out to the living room and they both dropped down onto the couch in unison, the cheap wooden frame groaning under the sudden strain.

“So, Badger. MacCullum. New York.”

“Yeah, them. That…” Mordechai replied, running his hand through his hair.“Badger found me, pulled strings with people he still knows in New York,” He let that sink in for a moment, the hoops Mika had to have gone through to find him. ”I actually flipped out a bit on him when he showed up outta the blue, but he made it pretty clear that he wasn’t lettin’ me go dark on him again. I’d left Phil my new burner in case…in case anything happened ta anyone else I loved while I was gone, and he called me up one day and said that givin’ Nolan my number was the only thing he could think of ta help him out. We barely ever talked too much, he just reached out when he had no one else. I actually only came back because I was fucked up enough when he called me that I said yes without thinkin' and I just started hitchhikin'.”

“Still could’a let Badger tell us about ya,” Sonny countered abrasively. “Shit, we didn’t have ta know where ya were or what was even goin’ on in your life, but I deserved a helluva lot more than ’He’s alive’ outta the fucker. Once ya let him and MacCullum back in ya should’a reevaluated where ya stood with the rest of us. Those of us that knew ya before the other side’a the tracks took ya over. The ones that grew up with ya.”

“You’re right, I’m sorry,” He ceded quietly, no excuse in his mind for his actions.

“And the girlfriend?” Sonny barreled on without a second thought for the apology, reaching below the table to pull out his smoke box and pull out a new blunt. “She came up talkin’ real demandin’ about ya, I almost went off the rails and smacked the shit outta her before she told me who she was.”

“I didn’t know she went around like that, but I’m glad ya didn’t hit my baby mama,” Mordechai started weakly, Sonny tilting his head to the side to glare at him while he sighed. “No I’m serious, I knew she had me on lockdown but I didn’t know she had everyone else locked out, I just found out earlier ‘cause Jokes made a comment. I just figured no one she didn’t know was allowed through, not that she went around threatenin’ everyone,” Because Allegra really just went around the first week or so of her residence in Edenridge and threatened the gang members who lived there. He couldn’t believe the level of audacity and self-assurance the five foot tall nineteen year old had. Any other gang members than the ones Mordechai knew closely and she could have gotten herself killed, or at the very least beaten to the brink, but she strutted her way through threats and warnings with confidence. “I’m not excusin’ it I’m just explainin’. Also she ain’t my girlfriend, we’ve never dated.”

“Y’all live together, got a kid together, and ya adopted her other kid,” Sonny piped up unhelpfully while ticking each point off on his fingers, recalling their conversation from when Mordechai first returned to town, and Mordechai repressed the glare he wanted to send the man. “Ya moved her ta your hometown-”

“She moved herself here,” Mordechai interrupted. “Literally bought the plane tickets while on the phone with me and Poppy the night after Carlisle,” Sonny closed his mouth but was still watching Mordechai, and with his eyes on him Mordechai couldn’t help but shift uncomfortably in his seat. “It’s like ya said earlier, I wasn’t doin’ well when I came back. Carlisle made it worse, and when Legs saw that on the phone she just made a plan and ran with it, y’know? She does that. She called Badger and sent him after me, and since he found me at Danny’s grave I’ve just been in the James house,” He specifically omitted his stay with Mary-Anne Zima, forever protective and respectful of Mika’s privacy surrounding his family, even with Sonny. “Badger is the only person aside from Legs and the James family that I had contact with. It wasn’t nothin’ against the Serpents specifically, if there was any chance I could be set off Legs kept it away from me. She didn’t even let me read the fuckin’ news.”

“Well at least you’ve been miserable this whole time too,” Sonny replied after a moment of silence before hitting his blunt with a bit of a vindictive smirk and passing it to the other man. As Mordechai accepted it he had to do a double take at the sudden amusement in the other’s green eyes.

“Wait, d’you like her now that you’ve heard that?”

“Fuck no,” Sonny denied, smirk falling into a neutral line and eyes going blank. “I have no idea what you’re talkin’ about. I do got a question, though.”

“...Yeah?” Mordechai asked warily, leaning away from him.

“How many stints inside does this make for ya, and was the warden that ya fucked your favorite-”

“Oh fuck off Sunshine-”

“No, really, that’s a helluva a way ta get time served, just sayin’-”

“Are we really doin’ this?”

“No,” Sonny replied, rolling his eyes and snatching his blunt out of Mordechai’s hands. “I’m still upset.”

Mordechai flexed his hands open and closed a few times in frustration, knowing Sonny swinging back and forth in his mood was because of the turmoil that he’d thrown the other man into with his sudden presence. Sonny could always switch up attitudes on a dime, and he weaponized this in arguments with people like Mordechai who try to read the flow of a conversation. Sonny and Mordechai knew every button that they could press on one another, and they’d had most of their lives to test their limits, so both men in the room knew exactly what was going on when Sonny gazed steadily back against Mordechai’s glare. Most of the Serpents had seen Sonny use this technique to fluster Mordechai on more than one occasion, but not many had seen him use it vindictively.

“Look…Badger, Pops, and Legs, they all worked hard ta make sure I’d be able ta be sober-”

“Fuck that, what about yourself?” Sonny spat out angrily before Mordechai could finish his sentence. Sparks flew as he flicked the ash out into the tray and turned to glare at the stumped man. “Ya gonna leave all your accomplishments at the feet of others like ya always have? I let it slide the first time for the sake of the warden joke but you’re not pullin’ that again.”

“What?” Mordechai repeated for what seemed to be the thousandth time today. “What the hell’re ya talkin’ about Sunshine-”

They worked hard so you’re sober, Phil gave ya a job so you’d have a wage, Lancaster and Beau did everythin’ ta make sure you’re emancipation was processed.”

“...Yeah?”

“Yeah?” he mocked, face sour. “Fuck you. What about sayin’ I got sober ‘cause I needed to, I started a job and ran a crew younger than most people hit puberty because I had ta raise my brother, I worked away my teenage years and figured out the legal system enough ta get emancipated and get my little brother out?” Sonny was glaring at Mordechai as the other seemed to be short circuiting in front of him. “Seriously? Every bad thing that’s ever so much as happened around ya is somehow your fault, but the second ya have your own accomplishments they belong ta someone else?”

“...Oh.”

“Yeah, oh.”

“We- I can’t- why are we talkin’ about this? Wasn’t I apologizin’? Explainin’?”

“Then do it right, Mordechai.” Sonny snapped, his tone breaking right through the tension between them and creating a whole new one. Years of that tone being used for commands in the bedroom and to bring him out of fogs flashed through Mordechai’s mind and brought heat rushing to his face. He cleared his throat and looked away, ready to speak again until Sonny stopped him with a curt, “Explain everythin’ ta me without your self depricatin’ bullshit or keep your fuckin’ mouth shut.”

After that, silence stretched between the two while the blunt was passed back and forth, Sonny letting Mordechai get his thoughts together and Mordechai following orders to not say anything until he’d done so. Finally, as the cherry was burning down to the filter, Mordechai took a deep breath and sat forward with his elbows on his knees and his head in his hands.

“I got sober again. People helped, but I did that.”

“Good,” Sonny replied evenly, finally giving Mordechai his gaze again to show his approval but not budging any further. “Continue.”

“I got sober because I needed ta be and it was the best choice for my life. I stayed in the house, let Legs keep me there, because I knew that was the only way I’d get through it without immediate relapses. I listen ta her because I know that anythin’ she does with me is to make sure that her kids continue ta have a father growin’ up. She doesn’t just control me, I need ya ta understand that,” Sonny’s face was a mask of indifference, giving Mordechai no sign of his thoughts so far. “Allegra’s gonna be a part of my life no matter what from now on, that’s not even somethin’ that I would want ta change if I could,” He continued earnestly, thinking back on all the things that Allegra has done for him in the past two years, knowing that he has perspective on her and her attitude that others didn’t. “She’s saved my life, Sonny.”

“Wouldn’t’ve had ta if you’d just stayed here with me,” Sonny replied combatively but without any real heat, letting the other know that it was just for argument’s sake. “Whatever, so she’s here for good? She good for ya? Y’all still fuckin’?”

“She’s great for me, and no, not since I last left her and the kids in New York, like a month before comin’ ta town,” He answered honestly. “Hell, pretty sure from the scene I witnessed earlier that she’s already got her eyes on your sister now.”

“Oh Jesus christ, gross,” Sonny groaned before promptly pushing that bit of information away for another time, unwilling to get sidetracked. “Fine, so she’s gonna be around, so long as she doesn’t keep ya away from me anymore I don’t give a shit what she does. What about the Serpents? You’re back?”

“Bottom rung of the Rose crew,” Sonny pulled a face and Mordechai raised his hands placatingly. “I know, Tate actually asked if I could handle it, but I’m good and Legs is partnerin’ with me, just trust that. I’ll work my way back up, fight in the Pit for extra money if this and my job at Phil’s can’t cover everythin’ I need. Don’t start any shit with R2 over this, he hates ya as is.”

A look flashed across Sonny’s face, the same one that always came over him when Rey Rey’s attitude towards him was brought up. It was a face that said ’he has his reasons’ without giving anything more away, and Mordechai wondered if he thought that face kept him from putting the puzzle pieces together years ago. Rey Rey was as fine with Sonny upon their introduction to the crew as he was with anyone else, but something changed around New Years of Sophomore year. Sonny and Lacey’s parents go missing and suddenly Sonny is on Rey Rey’s shitlist. As someone that knew the Cernis parents and how they treated their kids, as well as knowing it happened around New Years when they liked to have a big blowout and beat down- knowing that the Cernis parents had blown back into town early and ruined Lacey’s anniversary surprise for Zion who would have been hiding in the basement around that time- Mordechai and Danny had talked about the likelihoods in the dark that night and then promptly locked their lips and thrown away the key. It was the one thing Sonny never talked about with Mordechai, but that didn’t mean he didn’t still know.

“I’m not leavin’ ya again, Sunshine,” Mordechai said after the silence had relaxed from tense to comfortable. “I can’t say I’ll never hurt ya, but I won’t hurt ya like that. Not again.”

“That’s not a promise,” Sonny retorted quietly as their eyes connected, and Mordechai could tell that both the questions and the fight had finally left him. Seeming to have noticed it himself, Sonny tried to break their gaze and muster up more combative energy, and Mordechai reached out and caught Sonny’s face to stop it from turning. “This isn’t over, I’m gonna have more questions.”

“We don’t believe in promises,” Mordechai countered, leaning in as Sonny’s gaze sharpened and narrowed in on him. “And I’ll answer any questions ya got, but right now…right now can we just be here with each other before I have ta go back ta the James’? I’ve missed ya so fuckin’ much and this barely touchin’, barely lookin’ shit is killin’ me.”

“Imagine how I felt the past two years,” Sonny protested but didn’t pull his face away. He turned fully towards Mordechai and knocked the hand off of his jaw, sending his own hand forward to fist into Mordechai’s collar in a mock of their earlier situation. Mordechai barely had a chance to react before Sonny was yanking him forward to crash their lips together in desperation, well past his ability to remain aloof in the other man’s presence. He pulled Mordechai over him and he shifted down on the couch, the other man following as he chased his lips. Taking a second for breath, Sonny propped himself on his elbow, other hand still in Mordechai’s collar. “I told Zi not ta come back with Lace till I text him, how much’a those three hours we got left?”

Mordechai fumbled to pull his phone out of his pocket and check the time on the screen. “About two. We could do plenty in that time.”

“Oh we’re gonna do plenty in that time.” With that, Sonny pulled Mordechai back down to his lips, the taller man’s phone falling carelessly to the ground, forgotten for the moment even as it buzzed and lit up with a message from Duke.

WHAT IF
Introducing: Preston Jennings & Ramón Herrera
FT: Jericho Phillips & Gavriel Shomer
Small FT: Phantom Menace
(Conan Dawson, Lorelei Mercer, Hennessy James
Asher Mitchell & Carter Jenkins)






________________________________________________________________________________

In the control room of Absolute Sounds music studio, Jericho Phillips watched the promising band, Phantom Menace, do a warm up song. A cover of Awake and Alive by Skillet. He was incredibly engrossed in the music as he made sure the signals of each channel were sound and good for recording, adjusting as needed. In the room over, a small kitchenette, Preston Jenning was bobbing his head to the music as he fixed the herd of people sandwiches, while waiting for the milk to steam for JP’s espresso shot.

He had already given Gavriel, who was standing beside JP, his caramel mocha, with almond milk and six shots of espresso. He also prepared and gave a dirty chai latte to his lover, Ramón Herrera. Well, all three of these boys were his lovers, which was weird to process at times because he did worry that he and Rye would clash. They didn’t, thankfully and actually could relate on a variety of things like anxiety and fear of missing out.

Ramón was pouting on the sofa, like he does, having offered to help Pres make food for their little family and the band, but Pres being Pres, a.k.a. stubborn as fuck, told him no. Their job was to make sure music and entertainment went without a hitch or the Queensnake would come for them. So, Pres tasked Ramón with reaching out to other local talents, compiling a list of those who would perform at his jazz club, Blue Heaven, for Beau’s retirement party. He also tasked his lovers with getting in contact with Beau’s children, especially the broadway star and the singer-songwriter, to see if they’d be willing to do a surprise performance for their father at the end, singing his favorite song. There was no doubt in Preston’s mind that Genevieve and Evangeline had the range for it and could make their father cry tears of joy.

After preparing JP’s drink, Preston came out of the kitchen and offered it to Rye to hold, seeing how breaking JP out of this zone was more work than not. JP watched carefully as Conan Dawson and Lorelei Mercer did a duet together, moving around each other as if this was what they were born to do. As if they were angels of music personified, in transcendental harmony and melody. Conan, the lead guitar, Lala the keyboardist. Around them? Hennessy James, on her white violin, gifted to her by her cousin, Maxine. On the right side of her was Asher Mitchell, best friend to Mirabella Belmonte, playing his carbon fiber black cello. He obviously had the dual purpose of being the bassist, but this song sounded better with the cello. Behind them all, on drums, was Carter Jenkins, a mutual friend of Mira and Ash, channeling energy into power.

This group of young, starving and hungry musicians, almost famous, held the ambition of immortality just like their predecessor band, The Gallows. A group of likeminded people who use their music as a weapon, in a war against unhappiness. They are spirits, admitting themselves in other’s souls, where they can never die. Rather than explain how they felt, they showed it and got lost in the music. The only medicine they knew to heal the heart and soul was music. Preston smiled at JP before giving Rye a quick kiss on the cheek. When he saw Ramón staring at him like a hawk, he sighed, “Fine, come help me,” before disappearing into the other room once more.

Ramón finally smiled and got up to prance after Pres, bopping Rye playfully on the nose and getting a tongue stuck out at him in return as he passed, his phone with the very list he’d been tasked to compile held tightly in his hand. Ramón had always done better when he was multitasking, and helping Pres play host was the perfect little bit of stimulation on the side to keep him focused on the task of rounding up the Beauregards and the rest of the willing Edenridge talent. Plus he always found it to be a little personal victory when Preston gave in on being stubborn for no reason, there weren’t many people that could glare him into submission and Ramón was of the proud few. Now in the kitchenette, he sidled up to Preston’s back and wrapped his arms around him, kissing between his lover’s shoulder blades before asking, “What can I help with?”

He was happy to help in any way. It was a little too late for any sewing aside from last minute fixes, and the party didn’t exactly have a costume theme for him to work his magic with, so he was picking up any little last minute thing that had been missed or forgotten until now, hoping to disperse some of the stress from his lovers’ shoulders. The last thing he wanted to do was end up getting in the way of Pres, and even when Ramón was being demanding or being a bit clingy, he knew when to step back and just follow suit so things went as smoothly as possible.

He was more than in the way. He was a distraction. Detaching from being the parent of their quartet, Pres unlatched Ramón’s hold on him and gently switched positions where his lover was against the counter and his tall form was pressed against him. Taking all distance away, he firmly grabbed his boyfriend’s chin and whispered, “Mm… I think I need something relaxing.” Drawing Ramón in with his heated gaze, he inclined his face towards his and let their lips join. He was tender and loving, even if there was so much passion being restrained so he didn’t misbehave. Pulling away, he leaned his forehead against his soulmate and softly asked, “What do you have in mind?”

Ramón’s sharp grin was answer enough.

“That was great,” JP’s voice resounded in the sound room from the booth when the song came to a close before suggesting their next song to play, “Okay, let’s do another warm up for Lala’s voice. Wasted On You, by Evanescence.”

The band listened to JP’s commanding presence, seeing how he was their direction and the one that knew how to push them in ways that none of them understood. They were all gifted in their own way but he knew where all of them needed to improve. Conan had more talent than he realized and he had the drive, he had the whole package, but he still was fighting a beast that JP didn’t know how to save him from. A southie syndrome where you didn’t think you deserved any good that happens to you.

Lorelei was so incredibly gifted, her voice could be the next Evanescence if she saw beyond this little town they called home. Unfortunately, the ghosts of her parents lurked over her and she was still struggling with following her voice. She was good at listening to her brother and her best friends, but never herself. Henny struggled with confidence and preferred to fade in the background. Asher wasn’t as committed to the band because he was raised in a northie household where music was damned as a successful career. Carter had a vibe but it seemed he was just here for the moment and not thinking about the long term. He would make it to practice but if they got a record label, JP was unsure he’d follow the band into the future.

The one who dreamed though? The one who wanted them to be more than just a small town band. Conan. That boy lived and breathed music and if JP had anything to say about this, he would make sure he could help make that boy’s dreams come true. He just had to help him believe that he deserved all the good coming to him. That it wasn’t just Chase meant to escape their unfortunate circumstance. No. Conan. You will live and you will live well.

“I don’t know how you do it,” Jericho broke the silence of the sound booth, turning from the band to look at his best friend, and lover, Rye. “What this town can do to people, especially to Southies, it’s such a hard thing to break. I am fortunate my mom carried all that pain and protected me from it, but seeing people like them,” he gestured to Phantom Menace who started singing a song from The Bitter Truth album and leaned back in his seat, nursing his espresso shot in his hand. “I just…” he paused and took a moment to down his shot, going from one train of thought to the next.

“You know to this day, all I can really do is talk music with the Boaz boys. There’s a fine line of how much I really can understand. Yeah, my dad was a dick. I got abused, but I still don’t think I have the right to connect with such… dynamic people. My mom shut that down a long time ago and you helped me get over that trauma. He gave up on my family but that just made me want to be better than the man he could ever be. Even with that being said, that’s nothing in comparison to what this town has done to some of these kids. Like Lala’s rapist step dad? Conan’s serial killer parents? Even right now, I look at them and just see the colors surrounding them, their potential. Their future. I can’t see their past and I can’t connect with it, even if I wanted to. I try, lord knows I do, but you Rye. You’ve always been so good at empathizing. Sure, at the detriment of your own health, but you get what I mean.”

“Jericho…” Rye started softly, his brown eyes locking onto JP’s own, his hands wrapped tightly around the warmth of his own mug as he untucked his feet from beneath himself and planted them on the floor as if to ground himself. His lover’s words struck a chord with him that he hadn’t been expecting, making him look out at the others as if he could see the colors that JP always described to him, before looking back to the talented man and seeing what Rye always saw; the duality in his eyes of Hurt and Healer. Hurt is everywhere, it didn’t hide behind property or poverty lines, it just shifted and morphed until it fit the mold that hid the best within whatever statistic it found. Healer’s eyes were far rarer, which is unfortunate given that those with them are drawn to help those who’ve been harmed. Unfortunate that there are never enough. Even more unfortunate is when they’re a swirling mix like JP’s, when they show that whatever pain they experienced before, that’s what turned them into healers. JP is drawn to people, but connecting outside of the music is different.

Sometimes, in times like these really, it makes Rye wonder if the trade off for being able to see the light people give off, their potential and future- or seeing their souls as Rye would put it- is that he’s blinded to anything else that may be there in the here and now. He loved Jericho, of course he did, and he knew that this disconnect bothered the other man. They talk about it every now and then, usually in the dark just before bed where they whisper all their worries, but Rye was hoping that that cloud wouldn’t roll across JP’s sky on this particular day. With this whole day focusing on the connections of the town to Beau, however, he could understand what got his boyfriend’s gears going.

“I grew up with them,” Rye finally admitted once he realized JP was patiently waiting for him to say more while he was zoned out, and he pointedly ignored the ending comment he’d made about Rye’s own issue of ignoring his health in favor of helping others. He was an EMT, it was practically part of the job description. He shook his head with a tight smile. “Not here, and not actually them, obviously, but when I lived in Cleveland it wasn’t much different. I was upper middle-class but my best friend Tayvon Marcus was a lot like Decky, to the point where I visited his grave to tell him about Decky and Danny’s life once we graduated, so he could know that some people do get out where he couldn’t. My buddy Tre was all bristle-y like Mika when I first met him, so I knew with him I’d either get my ass beat before getting a new friend or I’d get a surprising level of ‘let’s see how this shit goes’ before getting a new friend. The gang activity was less organized and there were a lot of kids claiming to be in gangs when they weren’t, and we didn’t have the rich kids and poor kids all tied up in the same schools, but it was like a dry run for what my life here would be, really,” He set down his coffee and tilted his head.

“You know I don’t…connect with people quite as well as you think I do, right? Unless I’m a better actor than I thought, because I was pretty sure that I was tolerable at best to a lot of people,” He laughed, realizing it sounded dumb as he said it. The amount of people he’d surrounded himself with since coming to Edenridge was vast, and he knew most of them didn’t have the disposition where they would just put up with him if they didn’t want him around. “Honestly JP I just insert myself against what my anxiety tells me. I literally faked it ‘til I made it. If this is really bothering you, come to more hang outs with me and the Southies, and when you’re listening to their stories, close your eyes and just listen. Don’t try and boost them to their potential, don’t look at them like they could be your next project. Step out of Healer mode and acknowledge that you know hurt, and that you can sympathize even where you can’t empathize. No one out there wants pity, and they don’t want people worrying about what to say around them. They want to talk about how shit things in their lives are and they want you to pat them on the back, tell them ‘that’s rough buddy’, and then roast them over something completely non related. You may not have a full conversation on your hands, but you’re still learning about them, still connecting, even if it doesn’t really feel like it. I don’t feel like I’m on the same wavelength as most people, I always feel like I missed conditioning for a sports season and everyone on the team already knows each other and the hand signs while I’m just rolling up before the first game,” He shrugged, rolling his mug between his hands and giving JP a crooked grin. “So I really don’t know if doing things the way I did will help, but there’s always trying.

Preston had Ramón pushed up against the wall by the open archway, hearing the other two talk. Into his lover’s lips, he gave an exasperated sigh, no longer prioritizing their lunches and his current snack, a sexy, smol latino. Releasing the other boy, who groaned in frustration, he led the way back outside and crossed his arms, looking at the back of Rye and JP’s heads. “You both need to shut the fuck up.” At this point, Jericho had taken a moment to drink his espresso shot only for him to choke on it, cough and turn his attention to where Pres was standing tall. “Doesn’t matter how old we get, you two got more chaos in your minds than Charlie Decker sometimes that you can’t see the obvious. Come here. The both of you. Now. And yes, JP, just let the musicians be.”

Rye, after almost dropping his half full mug from surprise and somehow managing to save it, set the drink on the table and followed after his boyfriends, catching up with JP and wrapping his arms around the other man’s bicep nervously. Ramón rolled his eyes at the curly haired man, who once again stuck his tongue out at the sassy man only to recoil when the latino snapped his hand out and caught Rye’s tongue between his fingers. The indecipherable look in the similarly petite man’s eyes conflicted with the cocky smirk, and Rye was once again struck with the familiar feeling of being studied on the spot before Ramón dropped his hand, trailing it across JP’s shoulders before he returned to Pres’ side.

“Um, what’s up Pres?” Rye asked when they reached their destination, licking his lips anxiously.

“First off!” Preston tenderly grabbed both of their heads and pressed them against one another. “Fake it till you make it? You only talk about music?” Exasperated, he glared at both of them, letting his questions sink in, so that they could replay it in their minds and hear how dumb they sounded. “I’m the one with a psychologist for a mom that psychoanalyzes me everyday and talks about my most embarrassing shit on the web for EVERYONE to hear and here I am, listening to this, and suddenly you two got a degree in psych. Going down the rabbit hole like it’s nobody’s business. Doesn’t matter how old we are, you two do the same shit. Over and over again.”

Crossing his arms once more, like the parental figure of the group (which was an odd role for him seeing how both his parents were selfish pricks), Preston caught JP’s soft and deep gaze, those eyes full of depth that could draw any person in, enthralling them by the imagination that waits on the other side, “Jericho, your love language is music. What you can’t say in words, you express it with song, whether it’s giving someone a record that they can resonate with or playing a song that makes them cry and realize something they’ve buried deep inside. You ever thought that maybe, just maybe that’s enough for people like Decky and Danny? I doubt they want people to constantly undress them emotionally, they got lovers and best friends for that. Pops can call Decky out so quick and suddenly he got puppy dog eyes and he’s thinking of ways to make things right. Sonny and Maya? Don’t even get me started with them and what they do to him, and no I don’t mean sexually. We find people and they all do different things for us, that’s why we got this whole poly thing going on. You do more than enough and I’m pretty sure they appreciate you or they wouldn’t keep coming back and wanting to listen to whatever shit you got going on in your head. It doesn’t have to be deep, but believe it or not, JP, you don’t have to say shit for something to feel profound. You carry this spirit that just attracts people and makes them want to be near you. Where you think you lack, we, the ones that love you, can pick up. I know for a fact I can’t just pick the right song for someone, but I sure as hell can see patterns and find the root cause of your trauma, given time. You understand?”

JP kept quiet and nodded as Pres went full mama lecture mode on their asses. He knew he over-thought, just as much as Rye did, but it was nice to have someone like Preston and Ramón to bring them back, in their own ways. Speaking of Ramón, the latino boy found himself naturally near Pres, behind him, tracing his hands on his back and massaging his shoulders, seeing how Pres was more often than not extremely tensed. Even when near those he considered family, Pres carried plenty of tension and Ramón took it upon himself to be the one who relieves it, whenever he can. Silent but helpful, thinking he was in the way when he did more than enough by being there and doing plenty of small things that are never left unnoticed. At least not by his lovers.

“Now Gavriel,” Preston reached out and grabbed Rye’s hand, rubbing it with his thumb affectionately. He didn’t say anything until Rye looked him in the eyes. Only then he began to speak. “Since when did caring become an act to you? You might not understand the how or why you do the things you do, but does that matter when you worry and love deeply? You call it anxiety, I call it kindness and a pure heart. Understanding a person doesn’t need a logical explanation. And this is for you both,” Pres glanced back at JP, sighing once more. He returned his hazel eyes to Rye and interlocked his fingers with the other boy’s. “Empathy comes naturally to you. I know for a fact neither of you have walked the same paths most of these southies have. You, Rye, befriended them, but you do not know what it means to live in their shoes. That doesn’t mean you don’t know how to provide a safe place, which is something you effortlessly do, and that’s what Jericho sees. He sees you effortlessly go beyond the shallow understanding and put in the time, effort and hard work to understand. That means the world to people. When you don’t judge them and you try, and try, and try your damndest to get past the barriers, it does a number to you, where I’ve told you you need to learn this thing called boundaries, but it’s also just who you are and I’ve come to accept that. That doesn’t mean I won’t help you maneuver around those flooding emotions, to the best of my capabilities. That I won’t do my part to keep you together.”

With ease, Pres tugged Ramón to come beside him and brought his boyfriends in a giant hug, “But that’s beside the point. If there’s one thing you have in common, it’s the fact you don’t walk away from someone when you feel lost for words. You’re there for them, even in the silence. And that speaks volumes to someone like Decky. Who cares that you both go about the same thing differently? It’s not about who’s more right, who’s more wrong, or having all the answers. Pay attention and look outside yourselves for a moment, see what you actually do for people because you’re both so authentically yourselves. Stop explaining the why and the how, no one asked. You do enough. I’ll repeat myself: You. Do. Enough. And the Boaz boys, the Dawson boys, Ramón and myself, we all love you just the way you are. You are great where you are, and that should be enough.”

He understood the constant need to improve oneself and strive to be better, but it was also absolutely necessary to see your journey thus far and love the person you are today. Find comfort with yourself and the now. Something he learned a long time ago with Rye and JP was they both were restless, thinking about everything and nothing at all, focused on everyone else but in a rather self centered way. They were both healers, yes, but when they thought about the good they did, it was focused on their own metric system of self worth, rather than the difference they made in that other person’s life.

“Why can’t that be enough?”

Rye took the group hug as an excuse to keep his head tucked down between JP and Pres, Ramón meeting his forehead with his own from the other side of the two taller boys. The men all stayed like that in silence for a moment, breathing in sync as Rye and JP gathered their thoughts. Before either could say anything, however, Ramón’s shoulders began shaking as a few giggles escaped his lips. Rye looked up at him questioningly, and Ramón shook his head with a smile.

“Sorry,” He said shakily, like he was holding in more laughs. “But like, ’I always feel like I missed conditioning for a sports season,’-” He lost the battle and laughed again. “Sorry it was just so quiet and I started thinking of it and it’s just that…Gavriel you’ve never played a sport in your life. It was so weird to hear that and not say something right then and there, but we had to let you guys use your words first.”

“‘Món!” Rye squeaked out indignantly before clearing his throat as their circle broke. “Don’t dissect my rambles, they never make sense!” That just made Ramón laugh harder, the slight man falling against Pres for balance as he tried to breathe.

“You’re eighty percent rambles,” He shot back teasingly. He knew exactly how to press any of his boyfriends’ buttons just enough for it to stay lighthearted while also succeeding in pulling them the rest of the way out of their own heads. Or pulling their heads out of their asses, depending on the situation. “Are you saying you want me to ignore you eighty percent of the time? Did you switch up your kinks on us, cariño?”

“What, no!” Rye turned desperate puppy dog eyes towards JP. “JP I’m getting bullied,” the curly haired man whined, pointing childishly at Ramón. “This is unacceptable.”

JP didn’t respond with words. Not immediately. Rather he kissed Rye’s lips insistently and repeatedly, to take the breath right out of him. A passionate motion laced with adoration and worship. Freeing his lover, he gestured for the other two to do the same. To kiss him. With Preston, their shared souls intertwined sensually, while with Ramón, there was a feathery lightness to their loving embrace, extremely playful and spirited. While JP didn’t know how to respond to the conversation, he was still very much present and thankful for their company. He chose to show that with his honest smile and soulful lips.

The four lovers in their own world were pulled out from their seclusion when a familiar voice laughed out loud and humored, “Man! Someone tell Danny to give me some of this love. My boy is oblivious as fuck.”

“Conan,” Lorelei elbowed her friend in the stomach as two members of the band made their presence known. “Sorry for interrupting. Eh-hem, we were getting a little hungry…”

“Yeah, are those sandwiches ready?”

“Don’t be rude,” Lala snapped, only being rewarded by an eye roll from the Dawson boy.

“Oh most wondrous gay gods, can I has't the sandwiches thee did promise?”

“Shit,” Pres mumbled under his breath, having gotten distracted and forgetting the main task at hand. None of these kids ate before coming here due to how last minute practice was fit in. Everyone got stupid busy this past week and there was no way JP would’ve been okay with having the band perform tonight without having one more practice. Ramón sent JP a look that said ’Distract’.

“One more song, then yes. You blow my mind and I’ll see if you deserve some delicious sandwiches from the PresMón cafe,” Jericho slipped out of all his lovers’ grasps, back in business mode. “To add extra incentive, Rye was able to get some beignets from Beau earlier today. I know how much you love Beau’s beignets, Conan. Oh and just for you Lala, strawberry shortcake.”

“Really?” Lala looked at Rye for confirmation, as if she couldn’t believe someone would go out of their way for her.

“Oh yeah,” Rye said with a blush, having completely forgotten the treats he’d gathered when he got off shift that morning and had a text from Ramón letting him know about the impromptu session. By now he knows the favorite treat for pretty much everyone in the room, and it just seemed like a nice thing to do in his tired brain. His heart, as it always does, ached when Lala’s disbelieving eyes fell on him, but he simply grinned at her and headed to the couch to grab the bag of treats he’d left to the side of it. He waved the bag back and forth enticingly, though not strong enough to disturb the pastries within. “One rockin’ recording for a rather scrumptious dessert for breakfast. Sounds like a good deal to me!”

“And don’t think we didn’t hear that little comment, Conan Dawson,” Ramón cut in before the group could return to the booth, smirking with his hands on his hip.

“Oh yeah,” Rye said for a second time, a devious smile overtaking his face and attention turning to the younger man. “You know you’ll have to tell him directly to his face how you feel or what you want, right? Oblivious as fuck is practically generous, that kid’s intelligence is geared almost entirely towards logic and numbers.”

“You’re going to have to be honest with your emotions!” Ramón gushed, squishing himself up against Rye and holding his hand to his forehead as if he were swooning, making his curly haired lover laugh. “Something the Boaz and Dawson brothers are so well known for doing, right?”

“Listen, I've been watching this develop and then stagnate for years,” Rye added in agreement. He shrugged carelessly, Ramón’s head bobbing with the motion, and threw his arms over the latino’s shoulders to draw him in closer. Ramón smirked devilishly when Rye faux-whispered to him, “Some of us have bets going.”

Oh, I need in on that.”

“Fuck off!” Conan cursed out loud and disappeared into the music room, along with Lala who had a wide smile on her face from the sight of cake.

Practice would resume and hopefully Mr. Beau would love their music just as much as he loved telling his students stories.

One could hope.






In Edenridge 11 mos ago Forum: Casual Roleplay
TIMESTAMP — After He Falls Head First
FT — Gavriel Phillips-Shomer and Danny Belmonte
Small FT —Jericho Phillips-Shomer

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Rye ran his fingers through JP’s soft locks as the older man laid down and rested his head on Rye’s knee. One best friend down, one to go. The pool party should be fun, and he’s more than happy to help with Niles’ load as well as make sure the girls were having a good party. The girls and him run a tight ship when it comes to keeping an eye on Niles’ mental health together, and often times they get ahold of him to deal with Niles when they’re at their wits end with the situation. He’s always seen chaperoning their parties with Niles as a sort of repayment for their vigilance and care, much like him coming over to hang was also a relieving of shifts for the twins, whether Niles fully realized that or not.

While he did want to check up on Danny, there was someone who deserved his immediate attention first. He put his phone down for a brief moment to focus on his love, curling over him with a small half smile. "Sorry I wasn’t there when you woke up, I’m checking up on the boys,” He explained quietly, gently scratching JP’s scalp and tapping his fingers on his bare chest. “Do you feel rested at all?”

Whether Jericho felt rested or not was not a concern to him. With his eyes wide open, staring around him, as if he was watching wind, chasing after the colors, JP tapped his finger on his lover’s knee to a silent rhythm. His senses were connected together and his brain linked to his surroundings, just like everyone else. And yet, for JP it was different. He saw things unlike his friends, unlike his family, and unlike Gavriel. While he took deep breaths, just like the boy beside him, he embraced the world, his world, as if it were a canvas waiting for color. Splashes of color, all in his head.

Every sound and every word had a color and he saw it all, especially with music. When he heard noise, he found color and that color inevitably led to a music note. Combining noises would lead to a song. And that is the simplest way to describe how his mind worked. The mind of a synesthete. There were so many ways to paint the world with color and for JP, he did exactly that with sound.

For the brief moment he was alone, and Rye was talking to his friend, JP was woken up by neverending cicadas buzzing, cars passing by in the lively streets of the Westwood neighborhood, and night owls walking to their next destination. Now, he was focused on Rye’s breathing and the ticking of his wristwatch, resting on their nightstand. “Do I ever?” Smiling, clearly caught in his condition, he turned on his back to look up at Rye. “You know, it’s cute that your favorite color is purple. Purple is very you.” He smirked, tired and playful. He reached up to feel Rye’s face, tracing the back of his finger on his cheek. “Both good and bad, the color purple is very you.”

Rye smiled down at his lover, aware that what he was saying was based off of whatever his senses were combining together to show him. He’d often wondered what it was like to be like JP, to hear color and see music and to find a way to put all the pieces together to make the music that everyone else experiences. This was one of those things that he had to accept, that he’d never be able to truly understand how JP experienced the world, and in times like this it just made him love his boyfriend and his mind all the more. His face felt warm at the point of contact with JP’s finger, the man’s love radiating into him from the single motion.

“Yeah?” He replied softly, resuming his playing with the musician’s soft locks. “I don’t even know what purple represents collectively, let alone how you experience it, but I’m glad I chose the right color to obsess over my whole life,” he hummed thoughtfully, tilting his head before smiling a little wider. Color me intrigued. What makes it so me?”

“Purple can mean different things, depending on their personality,” JP answered, repeatedly caressing his lover’s face. “For you, reliable and trustworthy mostly. Though your color has this lighthearted, romantic energy about it that’s hard to explain. It’s what drew me in when we first met. A gentle, soft purple. Nice to the eyes. I imagine it’s the same thing Mordechai saw too,” he casually brought up the former friend Rye loved, knowing this would cause a little rise. He wasn’t doing this out of malice. This was JP’s way of gently guiding his boyfriend to an issue that he needed to confront. “Well, not like me, but you get what I mean.

“I will say, some days there’s a gradual shift, to a slightly darker shade. Those days I know you’re caught up in a depressive episode. Maybe that’s why I’ve always just had a good read on you. I see you, through color.” Letting go of Rye’s face, JP wiped the sleep off his eyes, knowing well enough he needed to give him space to call his friend. The musician widely yawned. There was no way he was going back to sleep.

Rye's fingers had stopped moving through JP's hair at the mention of Mordechai, confirming the synesthete's expectation. He removed his hand before he accidentally clenched it in JP's locks and hurt the older man with his anxious tell. While he was still doing his best to come to grips with the fact that Mordechai was back home, this was the first time JP has mentioned him since the couple’s ride home from the airport when Rye first returned from his savta’s. The simple mention of the snake in the darkened room however had his nightmare from the other day taking its cue to flood his mind, making his previously relaxed form tense slightly with stress.

Rye didn’t know what Mordechai saw in him aside from a fun lay and a positive connection to the culture his upbringing withheld from him. He couldn't even begin to think what was going through the other jew's head when Rye had approached him at that party the second half of freshman year. But Mordechai had trusted him with his world and Rye had let it shatter before his eyes, and there’s no way he didn’t blame the curly haired man for at least part of it. Whatever Mordechai had seen in Rye ended up being a deception in the end, and a terrible price was paid.

Before he could chase that rabbit down the hole, however, his lover continued. He wondered if JP was watching his color- his aura? Was JP describing his equivalent of an aura?- darken as he described that very shift. The thought had him all but physically shaking himself to get rid of the negative feelings and thoughts so he could continue to be the soft light that first drew this musical savant’s eye. When JP yawned, Rye gave into an impulsive thought and tapped his hand rapidly over JP’s lips as he exhaled, staggering the noise coming out of his mouth into a little beat before he broke out into a large grin and giggled a bit at his own childish action.

“I’m happy to be your purple, Apollo, and I love when you start waxing poetic on me.”

Instead of saying anything immediately in return, Jericho placed his hand around Rye’s neck and pulled his lover into a kiss, sharing his breath. Rye’s lips still tasted like strawberry mousse and sparkling cider. He wouldn’t probe any further, Rye had to call his friend. He just hoped his lover knew that he had his support through all this and that he truly did think if he took the chance to talk to his old friend, it wouldn’t be as bad as he thinks it would be. A friendship like that always weathers the worst storms.

JP’s phone rang from the living room, which was a recording of him playing Shut Your Mouth by PAIN. He listened to the music as they kissed, swaying his head to it. After a moment of getting clearly distracted by his music, JP released his lover and rolled off of him. “I should get that.” Ruffling Rye’s hair before taking his leave, JP shuffled out of the bedroom to grab his phone to see who was calling. When he answered it, he walked to the kitchen to make himself a glass of water and asked, with a bit of concern in his tone, “Hey, Pres. What’s up? You okay?”

Rye watched JP walk out the bedroom room with no small amount of pouting, having been happy to draw out their moment as long as possible. He titled his head curiously at the muffled tone he heard JP take on, but couldn’t discern any words with the walls between them and his ringing becoming more apparent now that he was once again alone in the dark and quiet. He shook his head to refocus, remembering his previous mission and retrieving his phone from where he’d earlier set it aside, ready to call Danny and see how he was doing, how all the Belmontes were doing with the current circumstances.

Psyching himself up for another phone call- and god did he still prefer texting- he scrolled through his favorites, eyes landing on Oblivious Adonis and selecting his best friend’s contact, Rye put the phone to his ear, gathering up his blanket and bringing it with him to the bed. The small man plopped down on his back and let his head hang over the edge while the phone rang, viewing the dark room upside down and trying not to let his mind wander.

With one hell of a long day on his shoulders, Danny closed the door of the master bedroom after reading a piece of scripture to his mother and wishing her a goodnight. He was getting better at giving her company and he wondered if it was because he was with Marco now, who gave him strength. Silly to think that someone could cause a drastic shift in how he looked at things. Silly to think love could blindfold him to his mother’s declining health, aiding him in how he handled his interactions with her. Silly to think he could change because he loved a boy. And he loved that boy fiercely. Danny would do his utmost best to never lose that boy again. If that meant coming out to his dad, then that was exactly what he’d do, when the time was right.

When he walked down the hall to go downstairs and make himself a snack, his phone began vibrating in his pants pocket. He had no idea where his siblings were and he wondered if he missed the memo. Regardless of their reason for not being home, or if they were cooped up in their room not wanting to be bothered, Danny would go on with his night because that was just the person he was. He had a routine and rarely did he like things messing it up unless it related to his boyfriend. Danny was a man who kept to a regime, just as much as he kept up with how Marco spent his time away from him.

“Rye, what’s up?” He answered, entering the kitchen and going to the fridge to choose his snack of choice. “How’s your day been? Before you ask, mine has been hectic but we can go into all that in time. You tell me how your’s been first.”

“A lot better than some peoples,” Rye replied, recalling the update on the conclusion of the Dear David letters that Niles had given him. “Hung out with Avery and JP at MSM, Aves went all relationship yoda on me for a minute and then I planned a date night for JP and I. I stole some of Nina’s time to learn how to make his favorite dish and then made a little love nest in his- our- apartment because oh yeah that’s a thing now,” Rye stumbled right into the major something he forgot to update Danny on through text this morning, stopping for breath when he realized his sentences had run together. “JP got an apartment and gave me a key last night Danny, if I wasn’t so ashamed of how I was acting I would have passed out like some anime girl.”

“Oh stop beating yourself up and enjoy the moment. Gotta’ stop souring the good with the bad. Your life isn’t bad, it just has bad times, but ain’t that just how it goes?” Danny had his phone between his ear and shoulder as he poured himself a glass of milk and put some chocolate syrup in it. “Congratulations, by the way, that’s a big step and I hope it’s everything you and JP want. Just understand it’s okay to not have all the answers and it's one thing to live with each other under the same roof with your family but it’s another thing to have a place all to yourselves.”

The Italian man placed the milk carton and syrup back in the fridge, leaving his glass on the counter. He proceeded to sneakily grab the OREO cookies from the pantry. Cheating on his hardcore diet, Danny slipped outside, with his phone and delectable goodies. Setting himself up on the back patio lounge, which wasn’t too far from the outdoor kitchen, the Belmonte boy put his phone on speaker.

Tiziano Belmonte was an excessive man and liked what he liked. The Belmonte House was a beast. Full of intricate finds and offered just about everything a home could offer. A home theater, a wine cellar, a home gym in the guest house that also had Danny’s wood workshop. When Taz has an idea, he commits and goes above and beyond. His home was his happy place and the Belmonte children were lucky to have a father like him.

“If I could stop souring the good with the bad, Danny boy, my therapist would drop my appointments from weekly to monthly,” Rye snarked, smirking as he heard the plastic rustle of what was certainly not healthy food. “And thanks, I know it is but JP seems to think we can do it. I’ve even got an interview with Beau to start at the cafe soon, get some routine and income,” He brought his free hand off the bed to play with the curls hanging off of his head. Danny had always been good at just telling him what he needed to hear, much as Rye did for him, and it worked out perfectly for the two men that found it hard to admit when things were actually going well in their lives, always afraid of the other shoe dropping. “He offered to get me a job at MSM but I figured I’d be responsible-” He drew the word out dramatically, as though it actually hurt to say. “-and work at a place where I won’t be distracted by my boyfriend’s ass the whole time.”

“Smart move,” Danny chuckled, knowing well enough he too would have an extremely hard time working at the same place with his boyfriend. It was bound to happen since from time to time Danny assisted his sister at the Godmother. He could barely keep his hands off of him in highschool. What made him think they could work together side by side? The chances of them slipping into a back room to make out were strong and rarely off his mind. Thankfully, his fear of being caught outweighed his desire to take Marco at every possible chance he got so if it were to happen, he could only hope he could focus on the job at hand and not the boy he loved. Chewing on a piece of Oreo, contemplatively and deep in thought, Danny probed, “There was hesitation in your voice. You said JP thinks you both can do it. Live together. What do you think?”

“What?” Rye asked, immediately evasive, heart fluttering as he went on the defense. “There was no hesitation, I was just trying to figure out what sugary snack you were rustling through. Knowing you it's probably Oreos, right?” Rye sat up from his position partially hanging off the bed and shifted the phone to his other ear, pulling his knees up to his chest and throwing an arm around them. “Nothing wrong with a cheat night buddy, your secret’s safe with me. How are things going with Marco?”

“You know me well,” Danny stated, a hint of sarcasm and authority in between his words. “I’m very aware I’m cheating but I hold myself to a high standard. So yeah, I’m a little guilty but I know what I’m doing. I’ll just workout longer tonight.” There was a pause as he reached for his milk and took a long chug. When he was done, letting the silence linger between them, he scoffed, “There’s clearly something wrong but looks like we’re going the nunya business route. Got it. I feel so loved.”

Another pause.

“We’re great. Thanks for asking.”

Two could play this game.

Rye fidgeted with the corner of his sheet as the heavy silence took over, appropriately shamed for his response. He was calling to check up on Danny, not the other way around. He had been prepared to talk about Danny’s day first but his friend had promptly turned the table on that. He had answered Danny’s questions, just not fully, trying to speed by his part of the update on information alone.

But Danny could read Rye without any visual cues, and if the page wasn’t descriptive enough he would always ask for footnotes. Rye knew what he was doing by staying silent right now; he was weaponizing it against Rye who couldn’t stand silence on a normal day, both because of his tinnitus and due to his anxiety. As the ringing in his ears and light static from the phone filled the span of silence, Rye stared hard at the wall and bit his lip, holding his breath until he finally snapped.

“I think I’m gonna disappoint him,” He whined. “Okay? He really thinks I can do this but he believes so much in me and I just…I don’t think that way. I want to see me through his eyes,” Rye thought of his conversation with JP right before the current call. Without JP to see him, Rye let show the insecurities that his beautiful words had caused. “What if I’m not enough in the end, what if what he believes in inside me isn’t there? He brought Dec-” Rye cut himself off with a frustrated huff, mentally berating himself for another mistake. “Mordechai up in the middle of being all sweet and wonderful and I nearly fell apart all over again. What if I don’t heal enough for him?”

There, Danny’s silence demanded answers and he got them. Now Rye was biting his lip again and glaring at his hand tapping an anxious staccato on his knee.

“What do you want me to say? That it’s all going to work out in the end?” Danny inquired, putting his cookies and milk down, grabbing his phone and picking himself up from his seat. “You keep thinking like that, maybe you will lose him. Just like I did with Marco. I’m lucky though, that he forgave me. Doesn’t mean I forgive myself,” the young Italian man sighed as he walked down the back porch stairs to look up at the sky. “Relationships are hard, Gavriel. And I don’t mean just lovers. Friendships too.” He thought about earlier today where he and Mika exchanged fists all for the same reason. They both loved Caitlin. Mika wanted to prove a point that he would be good to her and Danny wanted his former friend to work for it. In the end, he could admit he was glad to have at least one old friend back in his life.

“You’re doing yourself and JP a disservice by doubting everything you’ve ever built together and continue to build. It’s not going to be 50/50 when it comes to supporting each other. Sometimes it’s going to be 20/80 or 60/40. But what I can say is that sticking with people is a choice. It’s a choice and you choose to love them because you’re giving yourself no other option. That’s all JP wants. Trust. He wants you to trust him and start believing in yourself, dude. But if you can’t at least try? What are you doing?” He paused and started to stroll in his backyard, thinking he was alone and out of earshot from others. It was a beautiful and cool night. Unlike yesterday where it was downpouring.

“Why are you with him?” Danny firmly asked, before continuing, “You’ve already given up, Rye, and if that’s the case, might as well break up with him. If what you have with JP isn’t worth fighting for, why bother? Do you think I ever thought I’d get a second chance? Do you think I ever expected for him to still care about me even after I ripped him into a million pieces? I don’t deserve him but I sure as hell will work my ass off to become the man he deserves.”

It’s not that I don’t trust him, I do,” Rye replied. “And I haven’t given up I’m just- ugh, hold on,” Rye took a deep breath, trying to keep his thought process to a single train on a single track instead of his usual routine of multiple trains passing by and narrowly missing each other. Why was he with JP? That was such an easy question. That was such a hard question. It was the little things, and the big things, and everything in between that made up JP and everything that attracted Rye to him. The man wasn’t a simple lyric, he was an entire song composed by a prodigy and performed with the backing of an entire orchestra.

“I’m with him because I love him. I love his soft voice in the night and the gruff edge it has in the morning. I’m with him because whether he’s embracing me with open arms or trying to shut me out and deal with things alone, I want to be there with him. It isn’t about making me whole with him, it’s just about us being happy. Y’know what I mean?”

“Yeah, I know what you mean. Maybe not exactly like that, since I’m still working on myself but I get it. What you have and how he makes you feel, it makes sense to you. Just how what I have with Marco, makes sense to me.” Danny found himself at the guest house, seeing that all the lights were off. He turned from it and started strolling back, passing his father’s tool shed as he enjoyed the calm of the night. “So what’s the problem? Stop thinking of the what ifs. That’s killing you slowly. JP sees something in you and yeah, maybe that’s why he brought up Mordechai because I imagine he knows you and he knows you’ll never be truly okay until you at least talk to him. Like for example, today I beat the crap out of Mikhail. We both feel fantastic now.”

“Yeah it’s jus- wait, what?” Rye’s eyes went wide, his fingers stilling as he registered the last part of Danny’s commentary. “Are you serious right now? Are you okay? I warned Niles not to get into a fight with Mika, I didn’t realize you needed one too.”

“Oh yeah, it’s all good. Sometimes we boys just need to get our issues out with our might,” Danny laughed, clearly having already made peace with the morning events. “It’s been awhile since Mika and I fought but it was needed. Sure, it might’ve been a little excessive but when all was said and done, we finally talked.”

“Well gee so long as you talked came the sarcastic reply, an eyeroll accompanying it despite the fact that Danny couldn’t see it. The motherfucker could feel his attitude, he just knew it, so he could metaphysically feel his eyes rolling as well. “How you didn’t get along with the rest of the Southies is beyond me, fists first is like their motto.”

The mention brought his thoughts back full circle to one southie in particular, and Rye felt himself curling up like an armadillo, as if a thin layer of cloth could protect him from the roiling ocean of chaos that was brought up along with Mordechai Boaz. Danny very well may have seen just as much, if not more, as JP of just how Mordechai and Rye’s relationship grew. He’d sat there and been forced to hear the raunchier details as Rye bragged about his place in their Game. He’d been in the hospital room with him when JP told Rye that the other man left town without a trace.

All the important people in his life kept hinting, both vague and otherwise, at this ultimate point in his and Mordechai’s paths where they collided again, and everyone aside from him seemed to think it was better for that to happen sooner rather than later.

These people did not literally have the blood of Mordechai’s baby brother all over them. Rye has healed a lot in these two years, and therapy does wonders despite his current precarious balancing act on the precipice of his mental state. Rye’s confronted a lot in this time, but something he never had a choice of his own in confronting was the issue of Mordechai Boaz and his late brother Danny.

When Mordechai left town, Rye had done his best to shove all his feelings about that unresolved trauma into a little box and cover it with all his other unresolved issues to deal with later, maybe never. But now, with most of his other deep seated problems dusted off and properly displayed on his mental shelves, that dirty box in the corner seemed to be shaking itself off and demanding attention. Rye was scared to give it. He was scared to dust off the key and turn it in its slot, unveiling the monster he let fester for almost two full years in the dark and the forgotten space in his mind.

“How do I even talk to him? I can’t exactly go right up to him and be all, ‘Hey Mordechai, long time no see, remember when we all almost bled to death together? Sorry it was only one of us’,” The topic had Rye’s dry humor take a darker turn, his mouth pulling into a distressed frown and he battled with his building anxiety. “How about, ‘Hey, thanks for abandoning me as fast as my father did after another event I had no control over, now I feel like I personally killed your little brother and you’ll never forgive me, how’s life been treating you?’”

Rye had no chill whatsoever. It was annoying. “Why do you need the answers to that? Why do you have to be prepared? Talks like that don’t have some kind of formula. They come from the heart. I’ve had the door slammed in my face so many times by Jill that I lost count but guess what? We finally talked and she’s willing to give our friendship another go. And honestly, I have to thank Mei for that because without her, Jill would still be drowning in alcohol.”

Furrowing his eyebrows, he found his way back to the lounge where his cookies and milk were. He sat back down and leaned back. “This isn’t going to be easy, Rye. It isn’t supposed to be. But please for the love of God, stop thinking about all the things you can’t control. What can you control? Let’s start there. In this situation, confronting an old friend, what can you control? If his name literally makes your heart sink, it shows you still love the dude. Now let’s take a few breaths and think. What can I control? Three things. What you think. What you say. How you behave. First one - what do you think when you think about Mordechai? And I don’t mean the guilt. I mean him, as a person.”

“...” Rye clutched onto the phone as Danny forced him on track, taking deep breaths and trying to calm his unnecessary nerves. “I think…I think that he’s always trying to do right even when he’s doing wrong,” the curly haired boy finally answered after another shaky exhale. “I think his drive to protect those he cares about gives off this energy that’s impossible to pull away from. I think he hurts others most when he’s trying his damndest to hurt himself, and it’s why so many people are drawn to protect him like he tries to protect others. I think he’s always been someone who’s circumstances created a soldier when he otherwise would have been a medic.”

“Poetic,” Danny smiled, feeling like he was making headway with his friend. With his phone in his hand and still on speaker, he pushed forward, hoping this was helping Rye get at least some clarity of what he wanted to do. The answers were all there, he just had to hush the noise and listen to his voice. “Not thinking of what happens after, only thinking about you, if you could say anything to him, and I mean anything, what would you say? And don’t be thinking about how you even got to this point or thinking this is an unlikely scenario. I don’t care about how we got here, all I care about is what is on your mind. What is on your heart. What would you say?”

“...I hated him for leaving, but I understand now,” Rye answered back, closing his eyes as he felt tears building up. “It hurt but it wasn’t about me Rye had never detailed the events of that day to Danny, or anyone aside from his therapist, obviously, and Elisa, who had been right alongside him. “Even with my whole support system, I don’t know if I would have been able to stay after seeing what Mordechai saw. Danny felt like a little brother to me but he actually was Mordechai’s. There’s a reason I skipped like half of Senior year and never ate at school again, so I get it, as much as an only child can. I just wish he had told me if he hated me before he left, so I wasn’t stuck with the nightmares and guilt.”

This was hard, Danny was being a proxy at the moment and just imagining that these words were actually reaching Decky’s ears made him want to stop, but he knew that his friend was doing the right thing by forcing him to confront it, if even a little.

“It really fucked me up, I still don’t know what he thinks about me two years after the fact and when I saw that he was back…I was scared instead of excited. My biggest issues in life surround abandonment and lack of closure, and suddenly everything I’d finally resigned myself to never dealing with is shoved in my face as soon as I get back from Cleveland. Just existing in the same town knowing that he’s here and that he hasn’t come to see me- to blame me, to punch me, to hug me, I don’t care-” Rye’s aggravation began to show right alongside the desperation in his voice. It wasn’t fair, Decky traipsing home and still avoiding him. He understood when he was gone, that was fair enough, but now he was back and living in Rye’s head rent free. “-it feels like my heart’s in a blender and he’s pressing puree. Does he really care that little about me? We almost died together and I just-”

His throat closed up around the lump that had formed in it and Rye swallowed hard to try and clear his airway, gasping as the hot tears finally burned trails down his cheeks. “I have no idea where he’s staying but he could have found me, I literally didn’t move until last night. Do I mean so little to him?”

“That sounds like a lot of unknowns and things you cannot control,” Danny exasperatedly sighed but kept on pressing onward. “Focus on what you can control. Last time I checked, Mordechai wasn’t someone with the best upbringing. I don’t know the details, like you probably do, but that means he might not have the best tools to help him decide. Not like me who was given the world since birth. A dad who works his ass off to provide for me and my sisters and a mom...” he paused for a moment, thinking about her state, currently lying in bed, fighting for her life everyday just to know her family would be okay.

“A mom who showed me the meaning of love and family. And that kindness goes a long way.” He cleared his throat, getting back on track. “Last time I checked, he has more people than just you that he needs to get to forgive him. Penelope and Jade, for one. And… Sonny? Yeah, I think that’s his name. I’m sure he has a long list of people that were bent up he left.” Danny might have not been a rocket scientist but he knew people dealt with things differently. He was one of seven and they all handled things in their own ways.

Nobody was perfect and it was wrong for Rye to assume Mordechai knew what he wanted when honestly, Mordechai probably barely was figuring out what he wanted. With all that trauma this town throws on you it’s hard to swim through your own sea of sorrows, regrets and guilt. That’s why patience, support and understanding was absolutely necessary. “Last time I checked, his best friend shot his brother and he wasn’t able to protect him, like I wasn’t at school to shield my sisters, my niece, the love of my life, you…” the more Danny talked, the more he realized the leaps he’s taken by confronting his truths and people of his past but also he realized that he too had guilt boiling inside him. Guilt for not being there for the ones he loves. “You can dance around and assume how he’s thinking all day, but don’t put words in his mouth. The only reason why you think he hates you is because of your own self loathing and THAT’S something you can control. How you see yourself.”

Rye went silent on the other end of the line, Danny’s words hitting home rather solidly. Sonny had been a complete wreck when Mordechai had left, that much was true. In fact, when Rye had gone southside after the shooting to see if anyone was still in contact with Decky, Sunshine had almost bitten his head off. Not that that attitude was different from his average, but the desperation and grief in his tone was something Rye had never heard from the other man. Poppy had been looking better recently, healthier every time he saw her peeking out from the back of Beau’s cafe, and Rye wondered if it had anything to do with the same person that had him all twisted up.

He knew these feelings were selfish, it was why he had never felt comfortable enough sharing them. Mordechai had lost his brother, Danny had almost lost Marco, his siblings, and his niece, JP had been stuck outside worrying about losing him and his sisters. Rye had just…failed. He’d lost little Danny because his focus was somewhere else and now there was another sibling in the world that had become an only child.

“I don’t like looking at myself through my own eyes, other people’s views are much kinder,” Rye admitted pitifully, his voice so small you could barely hear it. “Through my own eyes I look like a burden and a spaz. I try to think otherwise but I feel like I just keep proving it to be true. Current conversation being a perfect example; I called to check on you, to see how you were doing with everything happening, to check on Momma B., and instead I’m getting a free therapy session from someone who is definitely not licensed but is making a lot of valid points.”

“And?” Danny curtly responded. “We’ll catch up fully when we can. Right now you need me and that’s okay. And when I need you, I know you’ll be waiting with open arms. Give yourself some slack, dude.” No longer laying back, Danny returned his phone to the patio table and rubbed his temples. He loved Rye but there were times he wondered if his words were hitting deaf ears. Yes, he was aware of Rye’s tinnitus but that’s not what he meant. “I want you to be okay,” he began.

“For you to be okay, you need to start loving yourself. Validation and words of encouragement can only get you so far. That’s not fair to JP, me, Niles, you, your mother and whoever else. What makes you think any of your relationships will last if you can’t love yourself? You’re expecting us to fill something that only you can fill. You, Gavriel, are a priority. We accept the love we think we deserve and if you don’t love yourself enough to bring yourself closure with Mordechai or to realize that you’re already pushing JP away by doubting yourself, then I don’t know what to tell you, Rye,” Danny moved his hands around as he spoke, just like his father would when he talked. “Enough is enough,” his deep, yet comforting voice boomed in the backyard. “No more excuses.”

Were this not such an emotionally taxing conversation, Rye would have dove at the chance to respond to Danny very obviously using his dom voice with something along the lines of ‘Yes sir, I’ll be a good boy!’. Unfortunately for him, words were extremely difficult at the moment as he sobbed silently into the sheet covering his knees, hugging them tighter to his chest like it could shield him from his own mentality.

Danny was right, and he had unknowingly brought up several points that Rye’s therapist had as well. While he’s made strides with his therapist and taken much of what has been said in their sessions to heart, something about it being Danny to be the one to say these things hit harder, dug deeper. Niles had been his first contact and friend in Edenridge, JP the first to truly draw his eye in a special way, Mordechai had been the community and conversations that he missed from home. But Danny Belmonte was his first best friend in Edenridge, his first best friend since Rye had sworn off them in the seventh grade after his childhood best friend decided to see if lead tasted better than life.

What had started as one sided flirting with Danny had developed into a friendship based on mutual dumbassery, but also accountability. Rye had been a chameleon and a party hopper, adamant about not needing anyone close to him, and Danny had been a man’s man and a jock, under pressure to perform to his role as the only son and next man of the family. It never should have worked. Some of the things Rye had said to Danny would have gotten him slammed up against a locker and beaten by other jocks he’d known. Some of the more ignorant things Danny said would have had Rye starting arguments instead of conversations with anyone else. Yet for all their differences, they always matched each other’s compassion with the same fervor that they matched each other’s stupidity and competitive spirit, and that was what made what they had special.

Danny was telling him what he needed to hear, whether he wanted to hear it or not, and that was important to him. Danny was a good friend, and the way Rye was thinking about himself was hurting him, hurting everyone Rye loved. Hurting himself, just like not seeing Mordechai was.

“No excuses,” He finally parrotted back hoarsely. “Shit.” Releasing his death grip on his legs in favor of dropping them into a criss cross and hunching over, rubbing the remaining tears off his face with his newly freed appendage. “...You know I love you, right? Like obviously Marco has the romance section of love covered, but you’re stuck with me for the platonic love, I corner that market. It’s mine.”

It was a little selfish, the way he said it, and definitely possessive, but above all it was an expression of his love- his thanks- to his best friend and everything he’s done for him over the years, everything he put up with; the late night calls and anxieties, the severe oversharing of his sexual life, the clinginess and insecurities. Danny, much like JP and Niles as well, saw all of it, took it all in, and found reason to love Rye anyways. Despite it, because of it, he didn’t know, but if everyone that Rye loved was able to love him back, then he had to be able to find it; the self love that has evaded him since his father left, that seemed to leave the planet completely when Mordechai disappeared. He could do that. Even if it took time, he could do that. But he knew where it started.

It started with talking to Mordechai.

“Good,” Danny rubbed his face, relieved his words had reached his friend. “I love you too,” the Italian boy smiled at the phone, thinking back on all the good times, bad times he shared with his anxiety-ridden friend. “Alright,” Danny stood up and stretched his body, ready to clean up his oreos and milk and get ready for his nightly routine, “I got an early morning at work tomorrow, but to give you spark notes that we can discuss another time about me. My mom is as okay as she’ll ever be but I don’t think…” she has much longer. Not finishing his thought out loud, he diverted and went to another subject, “The reason I fought with Mikhail is because I caught him in Caitlin’s room comforting her. Truth be told, there’s a lot I haven’t told you about my other friends’ personal business but I’m sure you know now, at least one of the secrets because of the letters.”

“But here’s another one. Mika and Cece were a thing after David passed and I’m pretty sure they’re getting back together. So yeah, I don’t know how this impacts Niles but I’m sure you got that covered. As for Marco and myself, no complaints. He makes me happy.” Danny’s phone was back off speaker and in between his ear and shoulder, as he grabbed his things and went back inside. “Does this satisfy the healer in you? Your Danny boy is doing fine and dandy. I just need to work off these calories now.”

“Yeah, Niles mentioned Mika when I called him earlier. Never a dull day here,” Rye mentioned offhandedly. His phone call with Niles, his conversation with JP, they already felt like so long ago. “And your other friends’ personal business isn’t mine, if you’ve got secrets to keep for the sake of others I’m not gonna get in your way. And I’m glad Marco makes you happy, dude, you deserve it, however my inner healer will not be satisfied without another proper hang,” He knew what Danny had left unsaid about the Belmonte matriarch, and his heart ached for what his best friend was going through, for what he was going to have to experience soon. He was glad that the light that was Marco came full force back into Danny’s life when he did, as the young Italian man is going to need all the love and support surrounding him that he can get. “Maybe Marco too so I can redeem myself from that last race?”

“I’ll see when he’s free next and hit you up,” Danny said reassuringly, having put the cookies back where they belonged. Rinsing his cup, before trying to end the call to take care of business, he calmly pleaded, “Seriously though. Don’t worry about me.” He put his glass cup into the dishwasher, closing the door with his foot. “I’m okay, now you need to try to be okay. Go get your fluffy blanket and snuggle up next to JP as you watch, I don’t know, Whiplash. Put your mind to rest and relax. Actually, Whiplash isn’t a relaxing film. Go watch School of Rock. Sound like a plan, homie?”

“A great plan,” The curly haired boy admitted, more than ready to curl up into his boyfriend’s side. “Stay safe ‘til next time, buddy, good night.”

“You too, oh and Rye. I love you.”

“I love you too, man, see you soon,” Rye finished with a soft smile as he pulled the phone from his ear and hung up, staying where he was for a small moment before he took a deep breath and slid off the bed, exiting the bedroom to find his boyfriend in their living room.

JP was sitting cross legged in their little lover’s nest on the floor, playing his keyboard with the sound low. Hoping his face didn’t give away how strenuous the conversation had been, or that the purple JP could see didn’t betray him, Rye made his way over to the older man. In a turn of role from earlier, Rye crawled down next to him and laid his head on his boyfriend’s lap, looking up at the man with wide pleading eyes and a puppy pout.

“Danny said we have to watch School of Rock, I don’t make the rules.”


In Edenridge 11 mos ago Forum: Casual Roleplay
TIMESTAMP — After Here Lies The Answer
FT —Mordechai Boaz, Allegra Cardenas, and ReyRey Gonzales
Small appearances by Poison, Scorpion, Kamilla and Jokes
@Aces Away, @BrutalBX, and @LovelyComplex


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The Edge was surprisingly slow when the two brunettes walked through the front. Jokes was sitting on a stool at the front to keep guard and gave Mordechai a wide grin in welcome before his eyes cut to the woman beside him.

“It’s time then, huh?” He asked, excitement shining through his tone while Mordechai looked between the two warily.

“He’s settin’ foot in the snake den, ain’t he?” Allegra replied with a grin back, the gesture becoming a smirk when she saw Mordechai’s confusion. “Did ya really think everyone was gonna leave ya alone without a bit of threat? I made my rounds while Badger was watchin’ you the first week in. The hardest part was trackin’ ‘em down all over town.”

“Ya got a scary lady here, Boa, but it was mostly because she actually explained why it was best ta stay away for a while,” Jokes added, reaching for Mordechai’s shirt to pull him into a tight hug. “We’re all proud’a ya for gettin’ sober again, y’hear?”

“I hear ya,” Mordechai replied, hugging back just as tight before they released each other. “Thanks, Jokes.”

“Any time. Now head on back, ReyRey’ll be out soon,” the native man directed while pulling out his phone to send said man a text informing him of his guests.

The soon to be snakes followed his instructions and headed towards the back of house, towards the same place Mordechai had battered a man his first day back with no remorse, just because R2 had said to. Knowing not to enter unless beckoned, Mordechai leaned back against the wall while Allegra took her spot on the single stool next to him, crossing her legs at her knees and pulled out her dark purple swiss army knife. While she flicked out the file and began to touch up her nails, Mordechai looked around and let his shoulders hunch a bit.

“Feels like waitin’ outside the principal’s office in highschool,” He finally commented a few minutes later, eyes still wandering.

“Hm, is it?” For her part, Allegra had finished her nails and returned the tool to her brown jacket pocket, casually picking off imaginary lint before brushing the sleeves off with her hands. “Wouldn’t know.”

“Right, my bad,” Mordechai grimaced, forgetting that Allegra hadn’t even gotten that bit of normalcy in her life, having become payment for a debt at such a young age. “It makes ya more anxious the longer ya have ta wait, even if ya didn’t do nothin’ bad. Psychological shit.”

“And how often were ya actually not doin’ somethin’ bad?”

“Not often,” He answered honestly with a sigh, letting his head rest against the brick behind him as the attempt at conversation very easily died out, leaving the two in silence once more aside from the heavy beat playing over the Sin’s speakers. It seems Allegra had slipped into one of her colder moods already, though that was to be expected with the current situation. He knew Allegra had never had the best view of R2, and that it was made even worse by the event on Carlisle and her subsequent move here to help pick up the pieces of Mordechai he’d broken off that night. Her detaching from the situation was much better than the alternative.

There was a reason many came back to Sin, even after they tried to get out. Once you’ve built familial bonds, there is little to no room to see anything else. Through thick and thin, highs and lows, good times and bad times, when others turned their backs on you, Serpents were there standing at your side. Serpents always supported their brothers and sisters. No matter the circumstances, serpents were there. They support, they protect, and they never betray.

Some had their visages fade over time. No one talks about how Rusty looks, ‘side for his red hair. An enigma of a man, a hero among snakes. His reputation intact. His story, legend. Some lurked in the shadows, quietly building their legacies away from the light. Some got out and used their journey, their experience, to open doors for the rest of the den. Together, however, old generation and new, they’ve built a home, brick by brick, which continues to evolve and grow, for better or for worse.

When times change, we change with them.

An unassuming, yet gorgeous woman, with red locks, and dressed unlike any serpent, wearing a striped shirt, fitted jeans and tall boots, sauntered inside the Edge. If people didn’t know who she was, they would think the poor girl was lost but everyone that was anyone knew exactly who they were looking at. Fallen royalty. Before Allison Davies found comfort with the Kingsnake, there was Primrose Lyon. One of his best friends.

A surprisingly venomous woman who has proven herself before high school that she has more grit and aggression than the boys she grew up with. Two of the boys she befriended happen to be the ones in charge, the other boy, Yardie, was someone that left a deep wound in them all, especially her, seeing how he was her lover and he was no longer alive.

Here they called her Poison.

With a welcoming aura, misleading and not to be trusted, Prim greeted those she passed by before slipping behind the bar, giving Kamilla Briteson a quick hug and accepting the motherly kiss to the cheek in return before entering the backroom, where another office hid. The office of R2’s right hand man, Tate Paxton, formally known in this neighborhood as Scorpion. This wasn’t an unusual sight since those two had personal jobs given to them that no one else knew about. They were R2’s most trusted friends and there was a reason behind that. Looks could be deceiving and Primrose was the prime example of that.

“Do the Serpents only hire models or some shit?” Allegra asked as she followed the prowling figure until she disappeared from sight, almost tense from the energy that the redhead exuded. She had felt a shiver down her spine when the woman glanced over her and Mordechai. “Who the fuck was that?”

“Poison, one’a the Lyons,” Mordechai answered. “She’s probably goin’ ta talk ta Tate.”

“Wow, thanks for the details, you’re a regular poet,” Allegra grumbled, sticking her tongue out at him when he glared at her and crossed his arms. He shook his head and looked away from her, towards the door to the back.

“You’ll learn more when you’re actually a part’a things.”

“Pshh, yeah yeah.”

This was not what Rey wanted. The simple rule was that he not be bothered during his visits to the Blue Hill Reservation. That was his quiet place and his time with Jadyn was sacred. He was not to be bothered by Serpent matters unless absolutely necessary. Yet he now found himself having to cut his visit short to deal with a problem that kept reading its ugly head; a problem called Boaz. Having sped back to Eden that morning, he awoke Vivia for only a moment as she seemed more out of it than normal, just to let her know he was safe before letting her pass back the fuck out. Upon his arrival at the Sin, Tate mentioned there were no immediate issues in need of ReyRey’s attention so the temptation to fly his ass back to the Rez once he had finished with Decky was strong. He would visit Yardie’s grave and then go back to Jadyn’s waiting arms and the relief that he could steal a moment's peace for at least another day.

Still, he had to deal with his business first. Getting up from the desk that his abuelo, the original Serpent himself hand carved with a hunting knife, ReyRey walked towards the door and stood paused for a moment. He was beginning to unravel slightly, there were so many loose ends and threads that needed his attention like the Montero’s moving in, Vivia’s mental health, the affairs with Lexie and Jadyn and his own grief for Allison and Maxine that he thought he had buried alongside them. He was a man being torn apart by his own avarice and pride. God, he hated himself.

With a balled up first R2 opened the door of his office and glared at Decky and the women he was with. “Let’s get this over with. Come grab some seat.”

Mordechai had pushed himself off the wall and squared his shoulders the second he saw the doorknob rattle, ignoring Allegra’s eye roll while she slipped off her stool to stand before the door a half second before it opened. R2 beckoned them in and Allegra ducked under Mordechai’s arm to pass the threshold so the man could let the door swing shut behind them. Her sharp eyes stayed on the deadlier man in the room, watching the way he acted around the man she cared about but also watching for weakness. At the least, Mordechai had been right in saying ReyRey looked tired, she didn’t even have to have met him to see that. He didn’t seem the most present right now, either, as if his focus was miles away.

The man that towered over Allegra’s five foot frame was not the one she’d heard about in Mordechai and Mika’s stories. This was a man just as haunted as everyone else by the things he’d seen and done, but with a will and an absolute refusal to be caught in the arms of his ghosts. If Anya wanted her to believe in curses and ghosts, then Allegra could almost see a dybbuk that had wrapped itself around ReyRey’s soul and begun to weigh him down. This man was not as untouchable as her Ken Doll believed.

Mordechai for his part pulled out his and Allegra’s seats and they both sat down as directed, two pairs of dark brown eyes reflecting the dim yellow lighting above them as they stared at the King Snake whose head had begun to hang heavy under his crown.

“So.” ReyRey crashed down into his seat behind the desk and rubbed his tired face. His eyes were burning like they had been washed by chlorine and acid and his shoulders were ruined with tension. “You want back in?” The Kingsnake asked rhetorically. He already knew based on their conversation that Decky wanted to return to the Serpents. R2 was not a man that repeated himself, so he felt no need to rehash their previous conversation at Blue Hill about his usage of drugs. It was simple really, if Rey found Decky was back on the gear, he would kill him without a second thought. He did not have any space for addicts in his organization.

With his heavily ringed hand, the Serpent Lord took a hold of his glass and brought it to his lips, taking a long drink from the pint of beer that Scorp had poured for him. A small sip of heaven on a day that would end up being hell. He placed the glass back down onto the table and sighed before he spoke again. “Why don’t you tell me where you think I should put you?”

Oh. That was unexpected. When ReyRey had told Mordechai to come see him for placement, he hadn’t thought that he would be given a choice in the matter. ReyRey doesn’t usually give many options, only commands. He knew he wouldn’t go back to Captain, that was Sonny’s now, with Prof taking over the Lieutenant position. But he wasn’t just a Captain back in the day, most of the snakes double dipped when it came to jobs, many of them cross trained and perfectly capable of filling in when one person couldn’t make it.

“Runner,” Mordechai finally replied, tilting his head in thought as Allegra watched him carefully. “Have me work on earnin’ my way back up. I can start fightin’ in the Pit again ta bring in some more money, and if ya need a shadow for any business ya gotta conduct at the time I can do that too. Have me do whatever frees up the rest’a the pieces on your chess board, y’know I can be versatile.”

ReyRey leaned forward and placed both his hands on the table. “You got it all covered huh?” He glanced over at Allegra, who it seemed obvious had become Decky’s support. Even her just sitting there silently and without a glimmer of fear was enough to show him that she was some kind force to be reckoned with. “Here’s what we’ll do.” Rey took a piece of paper and scribbled some notes onto it before sliding it to Mordechai. “You’re gonna start at the Rose Motel. Bottom rung of that crew. You run. You get the re-up, you wipe their asses and you stay the fuck away from anyone who can get your ass in trouble.” R2 looked at Legs again. “There’s some whore work out there too if you’re girl wants a different dick between her legs and some walking around money.”

“Thanks, but I’ve been warned away from trickin’ anywhere around here,” Allegra drawled at the brash statement, unaffected by the disparaging words. Ignoring Mordechai’s warning glance, she crossed her arms and leaned back in the chair, meeting ReyRey’s eyes and kicking out her foot playfully as she finished with, “I’m too used to bein’ an independent contractor at this point. Not to say I can’t use my body to your advantage if ya need, but I’m not gonna just be known as some gash around here.”

“I don’t really give a shit what you do.” Rey shook his head. “I don’t even know why I’m bothering to entertain either of you.” If he was being completely honest with himself, the Kingsnake would rather just put a bullet in both of them rather than sit through any more awkward conversations. It would be a hell of a lot easier for him to dispose of their fresh warm corpses than it would be to try and act like he cared about them. He had too much on his mind and like he always had been, Mordechai Boaz was on the lowest rung of the totem pole.

These last few months, ReyRey did not feel like himself. He did not feel like the leader of the most powerful gang in Massachusetts or the most feared gang banger in town. No, he felt empty, hollow, exhausted. Ever since that night on Carlisle, where Decky and his friends brought up Allison’s death something inside of him had changed. Rey had no idea what it was but whatever it was he despised it. It was ruining him, burning him alive from the inside out. He was lucky he had Tate to handle day to day operations because at the present time, Reynaldo’s heart just wasn’t in it. “Just go and speak to Scorpion and he’ll set you up with the latest package to take down there.”

“That it?” Allegra scoffed with an eye roll, uncrossing her arms and standing up, buttoning up her brown jacket and straightening it out at the waist. “Why even have us sit down? Just got a thing for pretty faces?”

“Not now, Legs,” Mordechai bit out at the woman, well aware of how thin ReyRey’s patience seemed to be recently. He too stood up, glaring at her when she made no move towards the door that led back into the legitimate part of the Edge. She held his gaze for a brief moment, challenging him, and when he didn’t waver, she rolled her eyes again.

“Just sayin’, Badger’s brother sure don’t live up to the stories. Whatever,” She turned away and strode for the door, stopping in front of it and looking back to him with a raised eyebrow, hands stuffed in her jacket pocket. “Come on, then, we’re both busy people today.”

With an ungodly roar, ReyRey flipped the table over and watched as everything on it crumpled to the ground below. He grabbed the small wooden statue of an Aztec God that his grandmother had gifted to her husband on the day of their wedding and launched it across the room towards the entranceway. His manic gazed moved upwards towards the woman in the brown jacket but her face had changed. She was much paler, her hair a chestnut shade of brown and her eyes a sparkling ocean of blue.

Maxine.

She was never supposed to see him like this. The same way Allison wasn’t. Both women haunted Reynaldo’s mind like ghosts. They were permanent scars in his memory that he wanted to be rid of but was too afraid to lose. Stolen smiles across a room, a scent drifting around them, a sound that reverberated down his entire being. God, the disappointment the beautiful departed must feel for the man that Rey had become, the man they wished he had left behind.

Sharply, R2 turned away and looked around the ancient room that he stood in. The Original Sin. Over the years it had expanded, with an entire new front section added by his father several years prior. Yet the first building still sat within; the building which was once nothing more than a warehouse built during the founding of Eden. When Gory Gonzalez acquired it, he transformed it into a club for he and his brothers who had lost parts of themselves in Vietnam. It was within its hallowed walls, when interviewing dancers that he met the love of his life, Martina, Rey’s grandmother. Much of the decor in the building was hand carved by the pair of them.

In that moment ReyRey wanted to burn it all to the fucking ground.

Mordechai stood stock still between Rey Rey and Allegra, eyes wider than a deer’s in headlights while his form shook with fearful tremors, his mind flashing back to the years of bottles and cans and any other solid object in arm’s reach getting hurled at him like he was born with a target on his body. Fight or flight made way for freeze as R2 turned his back on them, but Mordechai felt like he couldn’t breathe until he heard Allegra’s soft but insistent call.

Mordechai, let’s go.”

The shaken man turned jerkily towards his friend, and it was then that he fully returned to reality, seeing the angry red mark spreading from her newly split cheek. He quickly made his way over to her, reaching out to her face but freezing as she caught his wrist at their waists, opening the door herself and dragging him out after her before slamming it shut so hard the picture frames on the walls rattled.

“Are y-”

“I’m fine,” Allegra answered coldly, her eyes angry slits as she surveyed the room they’d returned to. A wooden figure to the face was not the worst physical assault Allegra had ever endured, and she had no doubt it wouldn’t be the last one either, but when Allegra had stared deep into Reynaldo Gonzales’ eyes, primed and ready to unleash unholy hell, the man had not been staring back. His eyes had been on her, lingering on the jacket- another item of Maxine’s, Allegra was really starting to dig the girl’s style- but he had not been seeing Allegra as she was. He had lost himself to a ghost that had taken over his senses, and Allegra got a rare glimpse of how truly fucked the King Snake of the Serpents was. She’d already had a hunch, but this had confirmed it.

Under R2’s leadership, they were joining in on a crumbling legacy. This man was going to break soon, and she really hoped this line of ghetto royalty had an able heir that could take over in the next few years, because Rey Rey wasn’t going to make it long as he was.

Allegra glared at Jokes, who had turned around from his spot up front to catch sight of some of the commotion, looking between the two jews worriedly. What, funny boy? She all but hissed at him, posture as aggressive as it could be without actual hackles to raise. “Got somethin’ to say?”

Jokes just raised his eyebrows, now looking between Allegra and Mordechai assesingly.

“Don’t you talk to my baby like that,” Kamilla scolded as she came out from behind the bar, a clean towel wrapped around a bag full of ice in her hand. “He didn’t do nothin’ to you, baby girl.” Her gentle hands went up to apply the ice to Allegra’s face, but paused when Allegra jerked back and glared at her. Cocking out her hip and resting her bent wrist against it, ice still in hand, Kam raised an unimpressed eyebrow at the girl. “Now what you’re not gonna do is be actin’ like that with me around. I’ve iced bruises and cleaned cuts on every person that’s walked through those doors for the past twenty-odd years, and you ain’t gonna be some exception. Your. Face.” She held her free hand out expectantly for Allegra to rest her chin on, an air of weathered patience around her. Allegra responded to her disposition, eyes losing their defensive glare and turning wary, shooting to Mordechai for direction. Still trying to calm himself from what just happened, Mordechai just nodded numbly back, and Allegra followed the approval.

“There we go, let’s clean it up a bit first,” Kam wiped her cheek gingerly with the damp rag until the blood was gone before wrapping it back around the ice and applying the pack to Allegra’s face. Allegra moved to hold it up herself when Kam indicated that she’d be letting go, and the older woman smiled warmly before taking a step back and putting her hands on her hips. “I don’t even wanna know what just happened. Did y’all at least get an assignment?”

Mordechai nodded dumbly again before shaking his head to clear the cobwebs.

“We gotta see Scorp,” He answered, eyes straying back to Allegra and staying there.

“Well, he’s in the office, go on ahead.”

When they were alone again, before Mordechai opened the office door, he looked back to the woman who promised to stick by his side, eyes falling on the cheek covered by the ice pack. He opened his mouth and the look she shot him immediately told him it was a bad idea.

Don’t.

“...Right,” And with that and a deep breath, Mordechai opened the office door to reveal Tate at his desk. Hoping the man hadn’t heard the loud incident, Mordechai mustered up a shaky. “Reportin’ for duty for the Rose Motel re-up. Long time no see, man.”

“Hey,” Tate greeted, with far less emotion than his best friend. He was amidst preparing the budget forecasts, going through the numbers and profit/loss statements. He didn’t glance at Mordechai, not one to show much compassion and seeing how he was focused on a discrepancy of their own shorting them on their money. He hated when new recruits stole from the organization and he wanted to believe this round of young serpents had integrity, like the last set, so he went through the numbers again. Unlike ReyRey, Tate was good at compartmentalizing, which meant the news that Prim gave him about her work situation and FG activity was shelved until he could look deeper into it. She had left the moment she heard the commotion and went unnoticed. Presently, she was likely in R2’s office, comforting him or even just keeping him company in the silence.

Prim was good at that, entering and leaving without a trace unless she wanted to be seen. Even with such vibrant red hair, she was good at slithering her way through a building, no one really batting an eye at her presence. It helped that she was someone people easily liked too, which is why they assigned her on Afterlife duty. The only reason why she stays is because she has many girls she cares about that work there. In spite of that, she aimed to get out and she wanted to take her girls with her. It wasn’t fair she had to be that close to the enemy, knowing exactly when they came in and out of the building and even having conversations with Misery herself.

“You sure you can handle that job?” Finally, Tate put his papers down and met Decky’s earnest gaze. It’s a good thing he didn’t bring a girl in because Lord knows his wife would find out and want to cut her face open. “The job might sound easy but you’re a recovering addict, correct?” The Rose Motel was a drug den, a crack house, and a massage parlor. It seemed like an easy drop off but Tate knew more often than not the kids they sent there got curious and dabbled into the product. This wasn’t the lowest of jobs Mob could’ve gotten. This was a test.

“I got reason ta stay away from that shit, too much incentive for me ta go fuckin’ up again,” Mordechai answered, shoulders squared and eyes locked on to Tate’s equally dark brown ones. He knew that ReyRey had little faith in him, and honestly anyone else that doubted him was probably right to, after all he’d proven several times that staying sober was his true issue, not just getting there. Mordechai remembered ReyRey’s threat from Aponi.

“You screw me or I find out you’re back on the gear? I’ll bury you in the ground next to Decker.”

It wasn’t a threat to be taken lightly.

He wasn’t stupid, he knew ReyRey was shoving his achilles heel in his face and sending him headlong into the area he should be avoiding most, but if Mordechai was going to prove himself again then this is what he had to do. At least Allegra will be with him keeping him straight, it could be worse.

“Good. I got enough on my plate and cleaning your dead body ain’t one of them,” Scoprion wiped his eyes, exhausted at the thought of Mordechai fucking up, especially with how unhinged ReyRey has been lately. “You know where to find your bag, squat at the motel for a few hours, come back with money. Oh, and do note.”

The older man cracked his knuckles as he thought of the climate change of their town. “Police activity has picked up there. Try not to get caught on your first job back, kay?” It would come to Mordechai’s surprise that Scorpion softened while he was away. He actually gave him a warning and heads up. The Scorpion he knew wouldn’t even give him a second glance. He’d be given the product and properly dismissed with a fuck off. Instead, the man that Decky was looking at was a man, like himself, trying to change. Yet the obstacles this man faced were uphill battles and as of now, completely out of his reach, so long as ReyRey needed him.

Mordechai nodded back at Scorpion, the strong edge to his shoulders softening a bit as he looked at another former untouchable turned tired and showing vulnerability wear there was previously venom. Taking that as his cue, Mordechai turned to leave.

Snapping his finger before the boy left his office, Scorpion offered, “Heard you brought someone to town, if she’s looking for a job we got a new strip joint. Kinda something I’ve been doing in the background with the Angels. It’s not too far off from the Afterlife too. Give it a look, see if there’s anything she’ll like.”

“Strip joint?” Allegra’s head popped up over Mordechai’s shoulder from the hallway, intrigue shining in her once again bambi wide eyes while the man’s own eyes went heavenwards. He turned around and herded her backwards as she grinned and called out, “Y’all got a fuckin’ strip joint here? Got an application?”

“Later, Legs, it’s time ta go,” The woman was surprisingly maneuverable given how standoffish she’d been in the main area, allowing Mordechai to turn her around and lead her back out towards the door. With her mind now on something else, Allegra dropped the ice pack back with Kam and began moving on her own. As they walked up to Jokes, the man turned around and grinned. “Ya off soon?”

“Yeah, right about now actually. Need a ride?” Jokes asked, tilting his head at the two.

“Always,” The slighter man griped. “But I’ll settle for just this time.”

“You’ll build yourself another bike soon enough,” Jokes placated with a fond pat to the shoulder, getting up fully from the stool when Emira walked through the door to take over for the evening. “Don’t mind bein’ a chauffeur ‘til then,” He unclipped his keys from his belt loop and called out, “Bye momma!” to Kam, who replied with her own farewell, and led them out the door to start their first shift.


In Edenridge 11 mos ago Forum: Casual Roleplay
TIMESTAMP — Immediately After Ain’t No Thing, Just Everything
FT — Mordechai Boaz, Allegra Cardenas, and Lacey Cernis


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“You’ve been cryin’ again.”

“Shut up an’ drink your coffee, Legs, we gotta head ta the Edge soon,” Mordechai deflected, dropping his bag and switching out the cup in his hand with the baby Chai in Allegra’s. Eyebrow raised, Allegra met his stubborn stare with her own steady one, taking a loud sip of her delicious drink to wordlessly tell him she was more than willing and able to wait him out. She knew a lot about Mordechai’s relationship with the warm and welcoming gentleman that ran the town’s cafe. Like most people in this town, she’d met the man mentally long before she first set foot in Edenridge because Mordechai couldn’t stop telling stories about him once you got him started. It had led to a very blunt conversation between the two as Allegra made him confront his feelings once more.

“So he’s your dad.”

“What? No, ya said the same thing about Phil, what is wrong with you?”

“Nothin’, and nothin’ wrong with havin’ two dads neither,” Allegra teased. “Ya didn’t exactly grow up in a nuclear family livin’ situation, Ken Doll, but that doesn’t mean ya didn’t have parents. Ya really didn’t realize?”

“...Shut up.”

“Grow up, bovo.”


It had been a long one in the end, because to Mordechai the idea of having an adult that was safe enough to help him was one thing, he’d been forced to confront that with Phil and the Serpent parents when he was younger. However the idea that he actually trusted these adults as parental figures didn’t seem to compute, even with Beau coming in and basically fostering him and Danny in his home for a few months. She’d had to relate Mordechai’s experience to that of his friends adopted by the Dawsons, and even then she basically had to take his hands and help him put two and two together. Allegra was no shining star of peak mental health herself, but the damage Mordechai’s DNA donors did to his psyche- let alone his body- was absolutely enraging. If she ever saw Alana Boaz in town, the woman wouldn’t leave with her face intact at the least.

Mordechai finally relented and looked away first, bouncing lightly back and forth with Chai supported against his chest. “I said he was a dad ta us and I cried into his shoulder, a’ight? Happy?”

“Ecstatic,” Allegra deadpanned before grinning at him. “Way to use your words, Ken Doll, couldn’t be more proud.”

“Right,” Mordechai replied with a roll of his eyes, taking a seat on the couch and looking around for his other child. “Where’s Viva?”

“Nappin’. This little fucker didn’t want to for some reason so we’ve been up scrollin’ through channels.”

“I’ve been told Disney is a good one, or their movies at least,” Mordechai offered, mind straying to the Scott Street car ride and his conversation with Carrie. “It’s for kids, too.”

“What, ya mean I shouldn’t have been showin’ him Dexter?” Allegra mock gasped, going so far as to put her hand in front of her mouth as it formed a perfectly surprised ‘O’.

“Look, I’m tryin’-”

“MORDECHAI ARE YOU FUCKING IN THERE? I GOT A BONE TO PICK!”

There were two loud slams on the James' front door.

“I already know Sly and Vicky ain’t there, and your Popcorn girl lives next door or some shit but first of all, HOW FUCKING DARE YOU?”

The streetwalkers exchanged wide eyed glances with each other at the sudden noise, Allegra silently questioning the other if he was going to open the door before the banshee on the other side broke it down. When his look first indicated a negative, Allegra grabbed Chai from Mordechai’s hold and took a few pointed steps in the opposite direction of the door before turning around to glare fully at him when Viva started crying in the next room. As if it would help him instead of make things worse, Mordechai took a few dreaded seconds to try and compose himself before he had to face Lacey fucking Cernis.

What the hell was she doing here? Why was she picking her bone now?

“Oh,” Allegra’s equally irritated and amused voice carried over, appearing back in the room with a tired Viva and crying on her hip opposite Chai just as another round of slams sounded from the door. “This is how ya reacted with Badger,” He turned around to catch her vindictive grin, returning it with a look that very clearly said I’m tired of your shit. “This is another sibling-type, ain’t it?”

“...” Mordechai let his glare hang between the two in silence for a moment before realizing it would do nothing to sway Allegra, especially when he was in trouble for getting Viva woken up. “It’s Sunshine’s sister, Lacey.”

“Well?” She asked, raising an eyebrow when Mordechai’s next face very clearly said what? Make me. “Answer the fuckin’ door, Ken Doll, don’t ya ever learn your fuckin’ lessons?”

“Fuck you,” Was his eloquent reply. Allegra flipped him off while he dropped a hand onto the doorknob and took a deep breath before opening it and coming face to face with the woman that raised one of his soulmates.

“...Hi, Lace…”

“This is why you get punched when people visit!” Allegra called from the couch, allowing herself and her children to be known to the woman now visible on the front step. Mordechai steadfastly ignored her while maintaining eye contact with his older sister figure.

Glancing past Decky to see the model and children, surprised that there were outsiders in the James house but not surprised this fucker had another lover, Lacey took a moment to take in the sight of the woman before her fiery glare met with his. “Hi, Lace? HI, LACE?!” The older woman hissed, venom from the more seasoned serpent oozing out of her. “THAT’S HOW WE’RE GOING TO GREET THE PERSON WHO WATCHED YOU SHIT YOUR PANTS IN THE PLAYGROUND AND HAD TO CLEAN YOU UP?!” She pushed forward, using her indomitable will to force Decky back without laying a finger on him.

“Oh shit,” Allegra laughed breathily as she watched the leggy brunette manhandle Mordechai like a pro, making no move to help him as she stayed on the couch settling Viva and Chai. The baby boy was now the one crying from the stimulation in his environment while Viva slowly wiped tears off her splotchy cheeks and watched the intruder with wide, curious eyes.

“Ya know I’m not good with greetin’s, Lace,” Mordechai pleaded, hands up in front of him in defense while he leaned back from the woman whose fist was now twisting the collar of his shirt into a handle for her to throttle, no longer able to meet her eyes.

“Dumbass move, practically a foul,” Allegra refereed from the couch, excited to see more of Mordechai’s family in action.

“Shut up Legs, I sw-”

Taking a deeper look at the children, and seeing the boy that looked just like Danny, Lacey bit her tongue, her grip tightening around her friend’s collar. With her head, she gestured to the little boy, “He your’s?” There was a hint of disbelief in her voice as she came to the discovery that she and her brother were left out of this milestone for this boy they both loved dearly, far too much for their own good. “And you and her. You two a thing? Fucking? Loving?” The shock was starting to set in as she started to see why exactly her brother was hurt. There was so much lost time between them and who knows when any of them would die. Mordechai forgot who his family was. And that hurt like a bitch.

“Hey, whoa, no- I mean yeah he’s mine but we’re not- she’s not-” Mordechai suddenly started trying to get his shirt free from Lacey’s grasp, a hint of panic lighting up his movement as he tried to explain two years in the two seconds before Lacey came to her own conclusion. “-it wasn’t intentional, the cops took my fuckin’ bike and then I ended up in New York an-” What was Lacey thinking? What was forming in her mind and how much hurt and anger was it causing her?

He’d only kept in touch with Nolan because he’d messaged him while fucked up asking about him and Lanie like he hadn’t burned those bridges, and when Nolan reached out back he realized how much the other boy needed someone too. Mordechai only met Mika these past two years because the man literally found and busted in on his home just like Lacey was doing to him now, but that didn’t stop the fact that he hadn’t cut himself off completely from Edenridge like he’d illusioned himself into believing while excusing his benders and lack of care for his life.

Brownsville had tried to change that, but he was still so stuck in his own self destruction at the time that the only times he allowed himself to think of home was when Allegra demanded stories and anecdotes. He’d abandoned so much family here. Lacey had by all accounts been the Boaz brothers’ first ever authority figure. Before even Phil, Rey Rey, and Beau had become solidified as providers in his worldview, Lacey Cernis had seen two broken boys that had gained the absolute attention of her otherwise mute and empty eyed brother and decided she would do what she could to raise them, too. It had been her intense coaxing and coaching that had Sonny ready to talk and introduce himself the day he and Mordechai finally met in person at age five for kindergarten, and later the reason for such a foul mouth as he’d learned to speak from her, though she would never admit it.

“I’m sorry,” he whispered, hands still shakily trying to find a weak point in her grasp as if on autopilot, feeling choked despite the fact that she wasn’t impeding his air. “I couldn’t come back, but I should’a stayed in contact.”

“Bullshit,” she released Decky furiously, and ran both her hands through her hair. “Bullshit, Mordechai. Sonny might think you fucked off, running away from us but I saw Danny’s grave. Don’t play fucking dumb with me. There’s no fucking way you’re lying to my goddamn face right now.” She needed to calm down. All of this was crashing in like a tidal wave and she could feel every part of her body shaking. “Every birthday, every Hanukkah, even the day he died, you know who went to visit him? Me. And I saw what you did. Don’t play fucking dumb with me, you know I can’t stand liars.” She walked past him to take a seat in the kitchen. Leaning forward, she grasped her hands, holding them tightly, and bounced her right leg up and down, deep in thought. “When are you going to realize you’re not fucking alone and you never were?”

Mordechai took the time that Lacey looked away to send a look that conveyed his confusion and alarm to Allegra, who was no longer smiling at the scene before her. “Viva,” the young mother said to her child, the little girl looking up to her mother expectantly. “That’s your auntie Lacey, she needs a hug, show her how good ya are at ‘em.” The girl’s head swiveled between her mother and the woman in the kitchen while she gave her direction, sliding her way off the couch and stumbling her way over until she smacked into the new woman’s legs. Leaning against them, she extended her arms up towards Lacey expectantly, pudgy fingers clenching and unclenching in a grabby gesture while she stared Lacey down with her big brown eyes.

Loosening herself to look at the little girl, Lacey’s demeanor softened but instead of grabbing the child, she asked, “Do you want to hug me?” She let her question sit in the air, before adding, “I don’t want you to hug me if it’s not what you want, okay? So let’s start with this first,” the stranger got up and knelt down, bringing herself more to the child’s level (to the best she could). She offered her hand for a handshake, if the child was willing to take it, or even understood the gesture, “My name is Lacey. What’s your’s?”

Viva dropped her arms from their extended position with a bit of confusion, staring at Lacey’s hand like she was unsure what to do with it. Did she want to hug her? Of course she did! Hugs felt so good, and they made booboos and sad things feel better. Suddenly remembering the adult had asked her a question and bringing up the manners her mama taught her, she grabbed as much of Lacey’s hand as she could and shook it up and down happily with both of hers. Allegra, for her part, was watching the interaction like a hawk despite her calm demeanor, ready to intervene if anything were to go wrong.

“I’m Viva Gavwiel Cawdenas Boaz! Nice ta meet’cha!” She said dutifully, the name falling out of her mouth for the second time in as many days. Unlike the previous morning, Mordechai didn’t react at all, thoughts spinning as he tried to piece together what Lacey had said.

“A very pretty name. It’s very nice to meet you, Viva,” Lacey gently held onto the little girl’s hand. When Viva released it, the older woman continued, her voice no longer loud like she was when she barged into Mordechai’s new humble abode, “I’m someone who has been in your daddy’s life for a very long time and I want you to know, when you’re ready, we can hug. But I’d like you to get to know me first, if that’s alright with you? Like…. One thing I love to do is play with yo-yos. Do you know what a yo-yo is?” She asked curiously, guiding the child in the conversation but allowing her to be the conductor and take the lead if she wanted to.

Viva nodded her head vigorously, excitement lighting up her features. “Papa’s good at yo-yo!” she expressed, her words pulling Mordechai out of his thoughts and back to the conversation at hand. She began to stumble through her story about when her papa showed her a bunch of tricks. The reality was that he was extremely rusty since his time learning it under the very woman who sat in the kitchen- the one that taught damn near all of them when they were younger- and he only showed her like three tricks, just over and over again. The wonder of childish eyes. As much as he wanted to let his daughter have this moment, let Lacey have this moment, he couldn’t let go of what she had said, so when Viva finished her story, he finally interrupted.

“Lace, why’d ya think I’ve been comin’ back?” he asked, brow furrowing. “Why did Danny’s grave make ya think I’ve been back? That don’t make sense.”

Shooting a quick glare at Decky, she returned her gaze to the child and smiled, “Maybe later I can teach you some tricks. For now, go back to your mother but before you go, you can take this with you.” From out of her military green button up jacket she took out a LED yoyo. Putting distance between her and the child, Lacey stood up and did a finger spin sidewinder trick. It began with a horizontal pinwheel throw; she did that a few times before popping the yo-yo up and landing it on her index finger (on her non-throw hand). The yo-yo spun on her index finger like one would do with a basketball and just when the yo-yo was about to dive, she lacerated into the center of the string causing the yo-yo to bind. While the strings spun around the yo-yo, her throw hand hovered over it, which caused the yo-yo to do a side winding movement. In seconds the yo-yo was fully fastened and back in her hand. She handed it to the little girl.

Viva giggled giddily at the trick, clapping her hands excitedly before gasping as Lacey handed the yo-yo over to her. Unsure about accepting the gift, Viva turned to look back at her mother with wide eyes, prompting the young woman to smile and reassure her daughter.

“Go ahead bubbe, and don’t forget your manners.”

Viva spun back around to Lacey’s outstretched hand and enthusiastically received the toy from the older woman, shouting, “Thank ya vewy much!” before grinning widely at the brunette and running back over to her mom and baby brother, the latter of which had dozed off once the noise level had dropped. Allegra helped Viva up onto the couch while still paying attention to the tense scene in the kitchen.

“There’s not many jews in this town, Trouble,” Lacey crossed her arms, standing in a tall, intimidating way, dropping her nickname for the boy since he was little, for the first time since they were united. “So you’re telling me, I find out you’ve been ‘officially’ here for a month and you ‘haven’t’ visited your brother’s grave? I find that very hard to fucking believe. There’s no way the Khourys would visit him and the only other person who would, goes with me when I do. Are you seriously playing this game right now?”

“There’s no game, Lace, I visited when I got back but I was wasted ta shit, Badger had ta practically carry me out,” Mordechai admitted. “But you’re actin’ like I’ve been comin’ back this whole time and lyin’ about it and that ain’t true,” the frown became more pronounced as he thought back to what little he could remember of that day before he wasted the rest of it passed out on Mary-Anne O’hara’s couch. He’d started drinking before he ever set foot on Liberty Road, let alone through the gates of the cemetery that resided there. He’d been focused on the quote he could barely keep his gaze straight enough to see, but even through the drunken haze he remembers how much the quote had smacked him in the face.

“I must admit I miss you terribly. The world is too quiet without you nearby.” -Lemony Snicket

He’d remembered precariously dropping down and placing his back to the headstone while he unloaded all his guilt and shame onto Danny while the rough surface scratched at his back and shoulders. He remembers that it was one of the most uncomfortable places to be unable to get up from, but he had chalked that up to his physical and metal state at the time.

Now it made him feel like he was missing something, like he always was. His brain was struggling to fit together the puzzle pieces with such blurred images as his base, but Lacey’s words were instilling a fearful curiosity in him that he couldn’t fully comprehend.

“What did ya see that made ya think it was me, or at least a jew? I don’t fuckin’ know what’s goin’ on and I can’t figure it out with what I got.”

It was at this point that Lacey was beginning to believe him. The look he was giving was terribly dumbfounded. This only caused the sadness to be more visible on her face when she realized Sonny was right and Decky really did just leave them and never looked back. That is until recent days. “You got to be fucking kidding me,” she whispered taking out her phone and opening it to her camera roll. It didn’t take a rocket scientist to understand the implications of Danny’s grave now. The question Mordechai had been asking all his life was true. Somewhere, likely in Massachusetts, he had a family. Not like her and her boys. Not his chosen family. And she doubted it was his despicable parents. No, somewhere in this fucked up world, he had a real blood family that loved him enough to put so many rocks around his little brother’s grave and keep coming, lurking in the shadows, watching him but not once interacting with him. She didn’t say anything more, instead she tossed her phone to him and took a seat back down, waiting for his devastating response.

Mordechai caught the phone on instinct, eyes more focused on the way Lacey seemed to deflate into the chair like she was expecting another emotional punch directly to the solar plexus and was getting a head start on crumpling over. Trepidation lining his posture, Mordechai turned the phone towards him and blanked out as he tried to comprehend what was staring him in the face, the screen brightness all the way up so there was no mistaking it.

Rocks and pebbles lined the top of Danny’s gravestone, over a dozen of them painted with care or weathered with age, but just as many were blank yet carefully placed. There were different snakes on some of them, interspersed with little drums, which the man assumed were Zion’s personal touches, while others had musical notes and comic book onomatopoeias, a surefire tell of Rye’s hand. Closest to Rye’s were rocks with tells of the other Phillips-Shomer’s predilections or just a handful of the smaller unpainted pebbles to show they’d been there.

These all made sense. What didn’t make sense were the larger rocks placed around the headstone’s base, each one surrounded by smaller ones done in the same style, half embedded into the grass. Birds. There were lots of birds in the first one; he noticed a cardinal, a blue jay, a robin and an owl on some of the larger ones, the smaller ones containing pigeons, doves, and ducks. He followed them to the next grouping of rocks that seemed more focused on scenery and destinations. The aurora lights shine from the largest rock with such detail it looked like a picture, a snowy mountain range shared size with what was a surprisingly intricate field of flowers for such a small canvas. Giant redwoods covered another scenic rock while the sun sat above soft white clouds on yet another, a trail of birds- unlike the first set- in front of the bright orb drawing his eye directly to the next distinct style and grouping. A treasure map trail dotted across a painted brown background before ending at a large red X, and on the next was a magnifying glass that hovered over a bright eye against a dark background. The largest one of this batch was a carefully detailed star map, each dot of a star dedicatedly placed and each constellation gently lined. The final grouping of rocks were an almost dystopian mix of mechanics and nature, the main focus being a motorcycle covered in vines and moss, flowers bursting wildly from the headlight. A smaller one had a cute little broken down robot with his hand extended to the lightsource, a small fluffy animal that Mordechai couldn’t distinguish from the photo nestled up against the machine’s rusted tracks.

All of them were beautiful and each grouping showed unmistakably separate interests and personalities. None of which Mordechai could connect to the people he knows that would understand the depth and meaning of leaving rocks on a jewish grave.

“What…I-” Mordechai’s words came out in a strangled whisper as he tried to express to the room the absolute chaos now tearing its way through his head. Those rocks weren’t some fair weather visitor seeing a trend and joining in, they were intricate and well maintained along with the rest of Danny’s plot. They were remnants of people who cared enough to dedicate time and effort into painting a bit of themselves onto something permanent that would become part of the plot and indicate I was here, I was here for you and I leave a constant reminder. Flowers were ephemeral, they grow and wilt and die just like human beings do. Leaving a rock on a grave during your visit means that the love you place and leave upon your lost one’s final resting place will continue to last long after even you too have passed, much as your love for the deceased had already weathered their loss and persevered.

“I…I got blood?” Mordechai finally tore his eyes away from Lacey’s phone, looking distraughtly over to the woman and finally understanding why she’d dropped like a puppet with her strings cut. He missed Allegra getting up and slowly walking over to him, gently taking the phone from his shaking grasp before he dropped and shattered it. She respectfully kept her eyes off the screen and locked the phone before walking it over to the silent woman in the kitchen and setting it quietly on the table in front of her. “That’s what that means, right? That- that was four sets, I didn’t have any blood and now there's four people out there?” Mordechai’s chest began to rise and fall quicker the more he said and realized. “And they know about Danny? About me?”

“Apparently,” Lacey grabbed her phone and forcibly pocketed it in her jacket. “I don’t fucking know. I really don’t fucking know but I guess the only way to find out,” she stood up, not shedding a single tear even though she probably should and gave Legs a quick glance over before entering the living room. Going to the entertainment center, she grabbed a portrait off a shelf and made her way to Mordechai, “Whenever you come back from whatever you need to do, I’m assuming you’re heading to the Edge because it’s about damn time you showed your face there, start with the people you know.”

She handed Decky a portrait of the family that owned the house. Victoria had her arms wrapped around pre-teen Maxine, hugging her tightly and kissing the top of her head. Sly held onto the hip of his wife with one hand and kept his youngest daughter close to his side with the other. Penelope wasn’t looking at the camera, she was following something in the sky and twirling a dark item in between her fingers. A black feather if you take a closer look. A raven’s feather. “They’ve got to know about your parents, Trouble. I bet this whole neighborhood knows about your family but they’re keeping quiet. Why?”

When he took the picture frame from her, she placed her hands on his shoulders, pressed her forehead against his and desperately squeezed him, “You ever disappear again like that, I’m going to hunt you down and kill you, you fucking hear me? I will make it so painful, you wished you never ran from your family like that ever again. Blood or no blood. Don’t EVER fucking run away again. We need you, you stupid idiot. We need you…” her voice cracked and there was a sudden build up in her eyes. “Say it. Say you’re not going to leave us.”

“I…” Mordechai’s mind was swarming, and the feeling of being so lost was reaching up from within him, taunting at swallowing him whole as it had for the entirety of his life. Lacey’s connection at their foreheads provided him the grasp on reality that he needed to keep his head out of the darkness, and he focused his suddenly glossy eyes with her own as he registered what she said to him.

The James’, Sly and Vicki, they would know about his parents, about the family they kept from him? He’d never even thought to ask. You didn’t ask an adult about vulnerable things, it was a lesson that had literally been burned into him with all the others, so he had never asked. In his mind, his parents were only children and all his grandparents were dead, that was the portrait that had been painted for him early on and he had never thought to ask that it be tested as a fake. Were they his parents’ ages? He didn’t even know how old they were, the only reason he knew their names was because he and Danny weren’t allowed to call them mom and dad within hearing range. The only reason they knew their last name was because of school forms.

Mordechai had to rebuild his legal identity as a teenager with no access to his original information. The Serpents had helped fast track some of the papers, but it was one of the times that Mordechai had understood how his parents were crippling them from existing in common society, setting them up for failure and going so far as to not keep any of their identification. Trying to erase them from the world without killing them. It was one of the reasons the whole emancipation process and moving out of the serpent dorm had taken so long, paid dues aside.

But Edenridge knew his parents. The town his roots always seemed to die in when he tried to plant them, yet he wasn’t fit for any other soil, this town was actually cutting his roots off. Why? What had he and Danny done to be so bereft of familial identity? What sins of their parents were they forever paying for? Why had the town agreed to such a silence and robbing in the first place? The southside had agreed to communally purge all mention of the Boaz’s, and whatever the name of their maternal side was. This was some sick joke. It had to be some sick joke, right?

This cursed fucking town…

“I’m not goin’ anywhere, Lace,” Mordechai rasped through his tightening throat. He felt sick, and scared, and lost aside from the Lacey’s grip on him like the life preserver she’d always been. “I’m not gonna leave ya again.”

Their foreheads touching turned into Lacey pressing her lips on it, showing him that for as long as this world would let her, she’d be there for him. Pulling away, she quickly pinched his ear to bring him back from his dark place. During this period, she swallowed her tears, her heart hardening even more. “Okay fucker. I know these truths hurt like a bitch but it’s time to armor up and fight. Stop waiting on others to give you what you want. This is your truth, yeah? Finding your roots is important to you, yeah? Chase it. Chase it until you can’t chase it no more and stop being a little bitch.”

When she felt satisfied with her spiel, Lacey threw her arm around him, walking him with her to their next destination. That being Allegra. “Hey beautiful, sorry for that mushy scene. It’s good to see this idiot has someone looking out for him. Lacey. Lacey Cernis. I’m damn surprised he was able to find someone as fine as you. I hope he treats you right. If not, I’m just a call away. If you need someone to… show you around. I’m your girl,” she smirked, giving a playful wink; her mood drastically changing. It was almost concerning how quickly Lacey made the switch from familial interrogation to flirting. How quick she was able to compartmentalize.

Allegra had turned her head back from watching her children just in time for the two southie’s approach, a mischievous grin passing over her face when she heard Lacey’s proper introduction. She was well aware of the coping mechanism the other woman had just employed, and she was more than willing to play along. She made sure the other woman saw her taking a long look at her from head to toe.

“Oh, I’ll take ya up on that as soon as possible,” She looked at Lacey with the doe-eyed look that got her nicknamed Bambi. “I’m thinkin’ I need the full-town tour, start at the park, end at your bed?”

“That’s not the full tow-OWN-” Mordechai ripped himself from Lacey’s grasp while trying to avoid another quick shot in the side from Allegra’s fingers, sufficiently distracted from the previous emotional turmoil. “It’s not, it’s a straight shot down Carlisle an-”

“Are you gatekeepin’ my flirtin’? Listen here you emotionally unbalanced little shit,” Allegra cut in, a playful warning glare making his mouth click shut. While her comment had mostly been to lighten the mood and allow Lacey’s change of topic to truly take hold, it had also most definitely been an invitation. “Ya got dick the minute ya walked back into town, my dance card’s been empty for over two months, and your big sister is hot as fuck and looks like she could absolutely take me apart in the sheets-”

“Jesus fuckin’-”

“She isn’t wrong,” Lacey shrugged in agreement.

“So let me have my moment, ya already had yours.”

“Fine!” Mordechai replied in exasperation, hands flying up in the air. “Fuck my friends, fuck my family, at least you’re goin’ after Lace and not-”

“Not Sonny?” Allegra teased laughing as he closed his mouth and glared at her. “Your little sunshine? Baby that boy can light your life up like a menorah for all I care, I’m lookin’ ta be lit up like times square-”

“OK! Ok I ain’t gotta hear any more, and I know ya got more. Fuck. Y’all got like five minutes ta mingle before we gotta get ta the edge,” Mordechai relented with a grimace, trying to get the mental image of his sister figure and his baby momma out of his head. He dragged his hands down his face and tilted his head to look away from the two women who’s flirting was causing him mental damage. Viva stared back from her seat on the couch, head tilted to the side before her eyes slid to look at her smiling mother. “Wait, who’s watchin’ the kids?”

“Oh shit,” Allegra blinked, “I was gonna ask Poppy but she didn’t come back with ya,” Her attention immediately went back to her kids and she went back over to the couch to pick up a sleeping Chai, the baby boy groggily opening his eyes to greet his mother as he woke. When she got back to the adults in the room, Allegra gave one long look to each of them, raising her eyebrow at Mordechai in question. He followed her wordless query and gave a raised eyebrow back, eyes flicking over to Lacey before going back to her. Allegra nodded and he gave Allegra a nod in response. Smiling, satisfied, she turned to Lacey and lifted her arms so Chai was close to her while not leaving the safety of his mother’s hold.

“D’ya babysit?”

“All my fucking life,” Lacey gestured with a nod toward Mordechai. “This don’t come free though. If you get this loser to fix his shit with my brother, that’ll give us some space here to ‘talk’ about the town. Y’know, before I show you around.” Taking a step closer to Allegra, Lacey stroked her cheek with the back of hand, before looking at Chai, “That is if you trust me enough with your kids. We did just meet.” The older woman looked at Chai with veiled sadness and deep adoration. For a moment, the love she had for the Boaz boys was written all over her face as she looked at a ghost. As she looked at the face of Danny.

Shit, this baby really did look like him, it was scary.

“Nah,” Allegra replied quietly, cheek tingling from the gentle contact and face softening as she read Lacey’s. “I’ve known ya through stories from a man that ya raised, I’m just lookin’ to learn ya myself now. These kids are his responsibility too, and he wouldn’t okay it without havin’ complete faith in ya,” She looked over to her Ken Doll, and the man was looking away with an embarrassed blush burning at his cheeks. “I’m sure you're aware that he’s still in the learnin’ stage of speakin’ his emotions, but he’s an easy read once ya get to know him.”

She lifted Chai to her once more, offering the new aunt a chance to hold the new life born off of one they lost. It was her choice whether or not to take him, but her eyes showed so much longing and pain that Allegra knew for a fact she at least wanted to.

And Allegra was right.

With full permission to grab the baby, from both mother and father, Lacey eased her way to him, gently taking Chai away from his mother. Her finger grazed the other woman’s, and with that simple touch, electricity went in her skin, streaming through her body, causing her to grin in excitement. Mordechai did find himself a hot baby’s mama. And soon she’d get a taste. Yum. Sharing is caring, after all.

Locking her eyes with Allegra’s, Lacey thanked her silently for trusting her with her life. To Lacey, children were the future and the reason why most parents even get up in the morning. That’s how she felt with all those she’s ever raised, especially Sonny and Zion. Those two were her life and without them, she would be lost. Holding Chai close, Lacey leaned her cheek against the baby’s head as he rested himself on his aunt’s shoulder. “You two should get going, I got some cartoons to watch.” Swaying herself, embracing Chai protectively, she followed up, before letting them go, “Allergies? Meds? What they can and can’t do? Favorite toys? Things they’re scared of?” She shot glances at both parents, not caring who answered. As she waited for a response, she made her way to Viva who was sleepily lying on the couch and joined her.

"Viva just has seasonal allergies," Allegra answered dutifully, the way the woman treated her children already lighting a flame of affection in her guarded heart. "Baby benadryl is in the bathroom upstairs that connects the bedrooms."

"Viva likes to climb, if she goes for anythin' just make sure it's stable first, but we don't stop her unless it's dangerous," Mordechai added. "She will try ta take ya down from the top rope if ya let her get onto the back of the couch."

"Oh yeah, beware of flyin' toddlers that wrestle with a Boa and a Badger," Allegra laughed while playing off on Decky's warning. "Chai's not very fast at movin' around on his own yet so ya ain't gotta worry about him much."

"Don't show anythin' with clowns," Mordechai finished his bit, thinking of his daughter's phobia of unknown origin. Clowns just freaked her the fuck out. He wanted to recommend that Lacey find something Disney, but he honestly wanted to start that tradition himself and make lasting memories of time with his kids. "Chai gets excited if he sees animals, if ya can do anything with that."

"No sugar past seven, bedtime is eight, but at least one of us should be back by then," Allegra finished, grabbing the light brown jacket off the coat rack by the door and throwing it on. "Other than that, go wild."

“Got it,” Lacey was turned away from them with the remote in hand, looking through what was on Netflix. She held one baby on her lap and the other leaned on her. Briefly placing the remote down, she pulled the throw blanket on them all. As she stared at the television, she remembered something, “Oh, Mordechai, since you’re probably tired of surprises I’m going to give you one more. Conan is with your brother. It was a group decision that we wished you were part of. Just thought you should know.”

It was like Badger giving him a right hook, no holds barred.

Conan's with your brother.

God, he didn't need this now. He thought the serious parts of the conversation were over. Little Conan had finally been laid to rest with Danny, his ashes no longer sitting in the Dawson house, but in an ash plot on Danny's grave. The best friends were finally back together and always would be. It explained why Zion's grouping of rocks had drums and crossed drumsticks as well. He thought Zion was maybe doing it on Conan's behalf, but he was actually leaving them for the boy, now that he finally had a spot where you could lay your respects.

Little Conan used to follow him around right alongside Danny when the boy wasn't hanging out with his own big brother, seemingly enamored with Decky, or maybe Decky and Danny’s dynamic. Danny and Conan had bonded over traumas much in the way Mordechai and Sonny had, the way Mordechai and Chase had before little Conan was lost to them and being a big brother trying to raise the younger was no longer a shared concept. Because of the timing of Conan's death, Decky had already mostly made his move Northside, and Chase wasn't the type to come knocking on Decky's door for support any more than Decky was one to assume someone would want him to help them through new traumas. He’d never been the poster child for good advice or wise words, or even comfort.

Mordechai at the time still had his little brother, and had focused on the grieving Danny over Chase. He had a feeling it was the fatal mistake to their friendship, and that seeing Decky and Danny interact after the loss of his own parallel was too much for him in the first place. But still, it looks like Crazy Train finally found his forever destination, and it was perfect.

She was right though, he was tired of surprises, but now he was just downright drained and exhausted.

"I wish I had been there too, but for what it's worth it was the right choice," he finally got out around the knot in his throat. "They always wanted ta be together forever. Platonic soulmates if I ever saw 'em."

“Would be nice,” Lacey muttered, not finishing her thought out loud. She hoped she died before Sunshine. She hoped she died before Zion. That’s how things were supposed to be. The older people, the parents, die before their kids but she knew things weren’t like that, especially not in Edenridge. Maybe when all things were said and done, she’d share a plot with people she loves. She didn’t care who, so long as they were family. Tsking, wondering why Decky was taking forever to go to the Edge, procrastinating and trying to keep conversations going when he had somewhere to be, Lacey dismissed him, as she put Cobra Kai on the television (if the kids liked wrestling they would like karate too), “Okay, I know you miss me and all but you got business, right? Get going and make my brother cry like a little bitch. The babies are safe with me.”

"Right, right," Mordechai replied abashedly, looking over to see Allegra watching him with a raised eyebrow, hand on the door while she waited for him. This information dump had him hesitating, unsure of himself again, but he’d set his mind and he was going to see it through. "I trust ya."

Those three words spoke a whole story in and of themselves.

With that, the soon to be snakes walked out the door of the James house and started their walk down to the Edge of Sin, ready to enter the den of Serpents.

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