Avatar of Bluetommy
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2 yrs ago
Current I remember being on this website all the time. Where does the time go
1 like
4 yrs ago
Buying GF with Fall Guys crowns please pm me if interested
1 like
4 yrs ago
I'm going to beat you to death
4 yrs ago
Today on bottom gear
4 yrs ago
Dear diary, I shat myself to destroy the libs.
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I already have ideas but as Pyro's busy being a good-for-nothing SLUGGARD I guess I have to wait.

still love you though
The Eternal Warrior


"Right... kaiju..." Gilad mumbled to himself as he took the blades from his chest and impaled them downwards into his neck for easier storage. He sprinted through the streets of New York, leaving a trail of blood. He mumbled to himself, thinking about ways to kill a kaiju. He'd done it before but... it had taken a lot more firepower than he currently had. As he rounded a corner he spotted a barbecue on top of a large balcony, and with it...

Two propane tanks.

He had his firepower.

Climbing up the building, he grabbed the propane tanks and fastened them to his hips with some pilfered nails.

Now he just needed a way to trigger them.

As if on cue, a police cruiser sped by. Gilad smiled, leaping from the roof with a grunt, and slamming down on top of a parked car. Kicking his way in, he hotwired it, and sped off after the cruiser.

With a little effort, he managed to get beside the cruiser. He kicked open the door, knocking the metal to the street beside, and leapt over to the cruiser. He climbed on top and kicked his way into the windshield. With a boot on one officer's throat, he relieved the other of his pistol just as the car crashed, spinning through the air and sending Gilad flying. He crashed into the asphalt and left a hefty amount of flesh behind as he burst back into a sprint.

Right, bomb and trigger.

He realized that the car probably had heavier weapons in the trunk, and momentarily turned back to grab a shotgun.

Bomb, trigger, and boomstick.

Now to get to Central Park.

He arrived a few minutes later on a pilfered motorcycle, which he swiftly crashed into a tree.

Oops.

He pulled himself to his feet, pulled a branch out of his knee, and examined the skyline.

He was just in time to see the kaiju fall to a massive metal golem.

That's new.

"Tina, fuck's that thing?"

"I honestly haven't the foggiest, it is fighting the kaiju, so maybe work with it?"

Gilad worked alone, Tina knew that. He wasn't just some slut who would fight alongside anyone at any time, a fight is like a kiss, you don't just go up to random people and kiss them now do you?

"'With' is a dirty word, Tina. Bad girl."

"I'm sure the other geomancers enjoy your playful flirting but I'm not in the mood right now, just do what it is you do."

Flirting? He wasn't... well whatever. He supposed that with the beast prone, now was his opportunity. From the small glimpse he got of the thing, he thought he saw an exoskeleton, which meant the joints were weak spots. Or it could be a shell, if that was the case he could get between the plates.

Well he had two bombs, why not try both.

He dashed over to where the massive beast lie prone. It was huge, that much was true. Not only huge, but shelled, and on its back. All the better.

He leaped in between a split-trunked tree and used that vantage point to get onto the beast's belly. Before he had time to think outside of a quick "time to move", he had shot one of the tanks with the pistol and tossed it at the beast's shoulder. He probably wasn't going to kill it immediately, but robbing it of its weapons would make that part easier.

Then he saw its massive red eyes, dead and staring blankly. Huge beacons that drew his eyes. Ugly, horrible things. He wanted to break them so badly.

So Gilad tore a tank from his waist and tossed it, drawing his shotgun swiftly. He held steady as it arced down, down, right towards the beast's head. Finally, it was just right, and with a blast of shells, the propane tank exploded, just as the one he'd tossed at the beast's shoulder also finally came to the end of its fuse, the pair of explosions launching Gilad off of the beast and off into the treeline.

Hopefully that did some damage.

He hoped, and kept hoping as his head hit a rock and his skull smashed like glass.
Meep
Yes I did
The Eternal Warrior


Somewhere, at Some Point


The pounding of fist meeting target.

The furious growling of the attacker.

The snap of bone being smashed to flakes.

The cold hard ground at his back.

Wait, what the hell?

Gilad was on the ground with a broken orbital bone, staring up into the lights above.

What had just happened? He didn't think he was that drunk.

He ran a hand over his bloodied face, his cold, clammy fingers being coated in warm blood from a massive cut in his eyebrow. It felt good in a way. He pushed himself to a seated position, his hand staining the canvas.

Right, he recalled entering a fighting cage.

Right before he blacked out.

Okay maybe he was that drunk. On the bright side, he felt pretty sober right about now. On a completely unrelated note that headache could be either a concussion or the result of that aforementioned drunkenness. Well he was up now. What was he even here for again?

"Gilad? It's Tina."

Oh, Tina's calling. Either that or the big hairy Japanese guy in front of him has a very high voice.

"Hey Tina," he responded out loud, much to the visible confusion of the bloody-fisted gentlemen in front of him, right before Gilad's fist covered his confused expression.

"Just calling to let you know about a big monster mash going on in New York, like... I'm talking big."

"Oh really?" Gilad responded, holding his opponent in a leg-lock and elbowing him in the head. "That's interesting... too bad I'm in... uh..." Gilad looked up at the room around him, spotting a few tattooed Japanese men with missing pinkies. "Japan, right now, definitely Japan."

"Oh I know, just letting you know. You know, just kaiju stuff, seems like something you wouldn't wanna miss out on."

Damn her correct observations.

"Fine, I'll see about making my way across the Pacific within the hour," he said, dragging his opponent's face along the cage and popping his shoulder out of place.

"No need!" she responded all bubbly-like. It almost sounded like she expected him to say that. "Just get to open ground and I'll toss you over."

That's strange.

He'd never had a geomancer do that before. He pondered why this could be as he drove the other fighter's head into the mat with a slam.

"Never knew a geomancer could do that."

"Oh yeah!" she said. Excitement seemed to be building in her voice. "It's supposed to be a last resort thing but whatever, you're immortal if anything goes wrong."

Well, she was right there at least.

"Alright you've convinced me," he said, holding the fighter in his arms like he was cradling an infant. "Just give me a second." He tossed the fighter into the cage wall, collapsing it and causing a few of the spectators to draw swords. Yay.

A not-very-interesting fight later, Gilad wandered out of the building with only two swords sticking out of his abdomen.

"Right... open ground."

"You're in the middle of Tokyo."

"Yeah... but there's no roof or anything."

"I'm going to open a hole through the Earth, I'd rather not accidentally sink the capital city of Japan, thanks."

"Don't seem like a very skilled geomancer if you can 'accidentally' sink a city," Gilad grumbled as he walked through the streets, ignoring the concerned passers-by as they attempted to get his grievous wounds taken care of. His interactions with the passers-by were simple, sometimes he'd just need to reassure them with a bored "I'm alright.", sometimes he'd have to knock out some police officers, the usual walk back from a day at the bar.

Finally, after walking for far too long, he exited the city.

"Right, I'm here."

Almost immediately after he said that, he fell, and kept falling. The air above quickly faded into a horrible stuffy heat, he couldn't breathe, his body burned, his lungs cried out in pain, and then it was done. It was impossibly quick but astonishingly painful.

And somehow a baseball-sized hole had been burnt into his torso. He could see right through himself.

"I see why nobody has ever done this before."

"Yeah, not a fan myself, oh well, you're here."

He turned, and yep, he was here, right outside New York City.

"Well, time to get to work."

Gilad ran into the city, prepared to fight and probably get drunk again.
Damn kids, get off mah lawn.

Rather than just express interest without doing anything, I decided to make a sheet first! Hope it's good!



I made sick man of Europe #3
Literally one post
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