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    1. Noblebandit 4 yrs ago

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1 yr ago
When they finish building the factories that are meant to ease our burdens, we will still be growing the grapes and they will still be drinking the wine.
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3 yrs ago
It's been far too long.
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3 yrs ago
They had a contest for the scariest mask / and I was the wild an daring one / who won the contest for the scariest mask / and I'm not even wearing one!
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Mai wasn't to know what Ishida thought last night, but if she had, she would have laughed up a lung. She would have taken ditching school to go meet with a bunch of other thugs over LARPing a gumshoe any day of the week. Lucky for her, she didn't know what she was missing out on: the task ahead of her had already put her in a foul mood, and knowing the fun the others would be having without her would have only made it worse.

Her mood was only compounded by her tremendously poor showing in front of the gang. She was so angry that when she sat down for breakfast the next morning, her parents had to ask her if she was okay, and she couldn't tell them yes with a straight face. What was she supposed to tell them? "Yeah, I'm fine, I just tried to join a street gang, and they all hold me in utter contempt, thank you very much, Dad"? That would have spiced up the breakfast table. It also would have resulted in her getting grounded until college, so instead, she fobbed them off with some muttering about school and fled before her mom could try to bust out the "girl talk". Poor woman. Mai knew she meant well, but she had the social intelligence of a spoon.

The first debate of the day was whether she should get Yonaka involved immediately, or whether she should try to get some information on her own first. Going on her own definitely appealed to her more. It would prove that she had something of value to contribute to the gang, and that she didn't need to hide behind Yonaka's skirt the entire time. On the other hand, if she couldn't get anything useful out of her classmates and she had to come crawling to Yonaka for help, that would just make her look pathetic. On the other hand, starting with Yonaka at her side definitely offered more security, but also didn't offer as much in terms of glory. She considered it as she walked to school, but try as she might, she just could not decide. There was too much uncertainty.

Then again, it all depended on who she was questioning. There were some people who she could crack herself no problem. There were others who would be impossible for her alone to take on. Whether or not she would ask for Yonaka's help depended entirely on whether or not she would need it in the first place.

So who were her targets? Who recently had been assaulted? Out of everyone in her year, there were two names that came to mind - Fujiwara Mitsu and Kishi Kenzo. If two more thouroughly unlikeable people existed, Mai was taking that as proof in the lack of a benevolent god. It was no surprise that someone out there wanted to strike fear into those two, and it was her task to cut through the laundry list of the enemies they had made and find out who exactly was the one that pulled the trigger.

Mitsu would be easy. She had her own plan to deal with her later today. It was Kenzo who was the real problem. He and Mai had history. Nothing serious; a spat, really, but she hadn't exactly won her way into his best friends' club. He thought she was as delinquent in the making, she thought he was a snot-nosed goody-two-shoes kiss-up who spent more time talking to the teachers than he did other students. A match made in heaven, she thought bitterly. Part of her just wanted to ignore him and leave him to the wrath of the student council he was so infatuated with, but as hilariously ironic as that would be, she wasn't doing this for herself. She was doing this for the gang, and the gang expected results. Besides, any joy she got from leaving him to his fate would be nothing compared to watching that little toad squirm when he found out it was Mai who brought his attacker to justice.

That got her thinking. Why should she hog all the fun to herself? She'd been going about this all wrong. She'd been thinking too much about what the gang thought that she had forgotten to have fun with this, and isn't everything more fun with friends? How could she even think of excluding Yonaka when she was undoubtedly about to do Yonaka's favourite activity: putting the screws to some hapless boy until he confessed something he really didn't want to admit? She had been handed a golden opportunity here. Best not squander it.

Once she realised that, it was like the clouds parted to reveal a beautiful sunshine. As she came to the school gates, she decided she was going to look for Yonaka. They had work to do.
What a coincidence! I was going to make Mai a baseball player!
I'm looking at this script, and I'm giving you a fair warning, in a couple of posts, I'm going to be turning this into a sports anime.
That's some really helpful advice, thank you!
I designed her as a foil to Mr House. They're both robotics geniuses ruling over their own state, but House is an old man with an economy based on services, who's quite isolationist and desires to rule as an autocrat. May is a young woman with an economy based on goods, who is expansionist and wants to rule quietly, from the shadows.
<Snipped quote by Noblebandit>

Well if you want help you just need to flip through some politics and histories the best way I see to find a country that is entirely linked to a single person is either due to the following:
A. the person in question massively purged government making no one really fucking raise a finger against then

B. The person in question was a military genius possibly charismatic who unified the entire region or liberates a region with such power through sheer dumb luck or simply realizing its enemy was too weak or tactics. that everyone basically respects that person like hell. No leader who won a war lost an election that is a fact.

C. is literally the founder of said people like if someone is like priest/charisma build to convince people to join their goals it basically makes them impossible to be questioned unless bad things begin to mount up against then economic malaise, instability, military disasters Etc.

i am using just great leader reasons as for the nation basically what they are is what is important if someone made one of "Alexander the guy who cant stop conquering" then most of the history would revolve around the peoples and their conflicts and then what happened during the peace brought by the guy is still tense relations with different groups or people respect the peace.


It's not that I don't know the character's history. I could explain it in a short form right here. The problem I'm having is specifically with the style.

The character is the daughter of two other company owners, one a caravan company and the other a tinkerer/roboticist. She was a scientific prodigy and spent much of her childhood in her father's workshop, working on this or that, gradually building her skills. However, she was also very gloomy and manipulative even as a child, and she knew just how to twist people into doing what she wanted.
Her parents both died in a freak accident when she was 17, which put her in charge of both companies, which she merged. To start with, other executives within those companies complained because who in their right mind would want a 17-year-old girl as their CEO? Then her critics started to disappear or had their own unfortunate accidents, and any public criticism from company figures stopped. She kept a close eye on anyone whose loyalty was suspect, and if she believed they couldn't be trusted, she had them liquidated and replaced.
Then, for the next three years, she ruthlessly expanded the business to deal in more than just robotics and caravans. She targeted water, brahmin, guns, salvage, anything people needed to survive. If she wanted something, you would either be forced to sell it to her, or she would send some mercenaries to steal it from you. It made her company snowball: the more she controlled, the more money she made and the more mercenaries she could afford to send to the next target.
And now she's in the position where she effectively controls all the major resources of the area she operates in (I decided it would be somewhere in Quebec, but I think someone else wanted to do Quebec and I don't want to step on their toes), and she's looking to expand outwards into foreign markets.

I hope this explains my problem in that the narrative focuses too much on one character, rather than a state.
<Snipped quote by Noblebandit>

I mean there is a way it's called living under the shadow which is better referenced IRL with the country of turkey and Attaturk.


Oh, I understand that. I just don't want it to look like I'm just writing the character's backstory, that's all.
Maybe you can give some pointers then www

My biggest problem with writing it up is that I don't want it to feel like I'm writing a character backstory, but when the faction is so closely tied to one particular character, it comes across that way even if I don't want it to. I don't want people to read it and think I'm doing something like "and this is my character and she's so smart and cool and clever that she can rule an entire country just by herself, lololol"
@Noblebandit What is your faction?


It's a plutocracy. One company has managed to attain a near total monopoly over the production of their region, and keeps people in line through a mix of bribing the real politicians, and hiring mercenaries to handle troublemakers. It was kind of meant to be a New Vegas style faction, but with a post-war economic genius rather than pre-war one.
They are mercs, not some ideological faction, so as long as they can still get guns and contracts, it would be pretty hard to get rid of them.

Speaking of which, we might need some mercenaries of our own, when I can stop judging myself over my faction's history.
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