Current
I gave you a bunch of daffodils because you're such a narcissist.
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4 days ago
Well if you must know, tonight we have a fine selection of courses for your dining pleasure, you may choose to either eat a dick, some pussy, or my ass.. If you're lucky you'll get a three course meal
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8 days ago
If you see two birds sitting on a perch, there's something fishy going on.
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9 days ago
I have a simple solution to the furry problem. Shave all the furries.
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10 days ago
Well I got done changing a lightbulb, too me a few minutes but I can only do it once a year.
Location: The Tavern/Avengers HQ. Interacting with: Femnal, Satilla, the Group
"About fifty grams of the pure salts. I think half a gallon of brine if not?" Thomas replied back. The recipe did call for fifty grams of purified saltpeter, meaning any impurities found in common niter would have be driven out by fire and flame. Otherwise, a nitrogenous brine salt solution would have to be evaporated and the salts recovered, like wise for any preserved meats and such re-hydrated to extract the nitres and from there the salt-water boiled out. Alchemy was one part chemistry, one part magic, one part cooking. "Hrm, I guess I could skip on the alchemy part since we are in a hurry. It'll take at least thirty minutes to prepare everything so, I suppose it won't do good for us in a pinch for time."
A few beetles later, and a mess of hemolymph on Thomas's hands and table soaking in rather nicely, they had extracted the six glands from the three beetles and their carapaces were sitting in Thomas's mortar to be ground to bits. There was no reason to grind them now, not with the rest of the group ready to go evidently. So they'd have to remain there awhile, assuming Femnal was okay with that and having a few living fire beetles crawling around. "Femnal, if you could please watch the beetles until we return? I don't want to lock them up, they might get a bit stressed if I keep them in the dark." Given that three were just murdered, it was ironic that Thomas should really care for the well being of the creatures.
"I've got some pure alcohol if you wanted to wash Satilla." As if almost on cue to Satilla's complaint, Thomas retrieved his silver flask of aqua vitae. Not that Thomas thought it would be useful to go around smacking undead with a silver flask, but rather offering it up for Satilla to clean herself with. "Careful though, it's pretty hard on your skin... And if you try drinking it... Well it's nearly two hundred proof." And with that, the sorcerer looked at his own hands with some moderate bug juices and considered cleaning them down with alcohol for a moment. There really wasn't anything wrong with having bug juice on your hands, as long as it wasn't puritic or corrosive. So Thomas held off for now and spared his hands the alcohol.
"Alright everyone, I guess pick up a fire beetle gland and we can head out. I'll be sticking close to Satilla due to my spells, so I think our Six glands here should be plenty for each of us. I'll try and do some alchemy later when we get back."
Well, if it was settled, it was time to head on out, bug parts in hand.
Location: The Road from the Apothecary towards the Tavern, the Tavern. Interacting with: Satilla, the Group, Femnal
With a nod to Kyra and Sana, who decided it was better to hurry than the dwaddle the daylight gone, the cosmic sorcerer acknowledge the fading light. Ah once more the romanticism of keeping these beetles alive slipped way with the lamenting of the western sun. Would they even know they were being harvested for their special glands? The illuminating organ so preciously held that was its defense, now became its down fall. To which Thomas sadly had to wave goodbye to one of his new pets, and with a solemn sadness tilted his reach into their imprison to carefully avoid getting bitten by a startled bunch of bugs. And yet also careful enough not to release all of them when only one could be dealt with at a time. Slowly, ever so gently, sneaking up on the insects before grasping one by the thorax and pulling away from the rest. The flashing distress of ember-like glow before its eyes signaling its anger. Squirming to escape, mandibles clicking and clacking away in a fierce demonstration against the predators strange. "I'm sorry buddy..." How quaint, an apology as Thomas forced the wriggling beetle against the table, hands pressing against the surface for Satilla to extract the precious glands near the frightened creature's eyes. Thomas could hold, if Satilla could cut. Or if Satilla prefered to hold while Thomas cut, the question was how may days would each gland last?
"How many more do we need to uh... Extract from?" Thomas wondered aloud, "I think we can spare a few if we can get two good glands out of each one." With his free hand digging around for his pestle and mortar to grind up the remains after Satilla was done. "Yeah, he didn't seem to have any Saltpeter, it's a pretty common alchemical reagent, I mean its used in quite a few processes and even... Wait a minute..." Thomas seemed to have a stroke, or a stroke of brilliance. Maybe it was the feeling of the life fading away from beneath his palm, or the twitching of legs still fighting him despite all that happened. "Uh, Mister Femnal Sir, you don't happen to have any niter do you? Any charcuterie or brining salts in the back room there?"
And either way, they had to cut up whatever amount of beetles were suggested. Though Thomas was rather protective of anyone but himself and Satilla handling them. In a twisted parental way...
Location: The Road from the Apothecary towards the Tavern, the Tavern. Interacting with: Satilla, Kyra & Sana
"Sounds like a plan." Thomas' reply as he caught the cat running back. Still a slight aversion to the kitty, but old habits die hard. Sort of like necromancers who turned themselves into liches. But Satilla was right they had everything they had required more or less, these bugs should be more then adequate for providing light. All that was left to do was to wait and see if the others finished up their shopping sprees too. And maybe tomorrow he'd find a bit more in the rather barren apothecary's store. Or maybe if they were lucky, they'd find an knickknack or two in the old tower to try and sell for some decent coin or alternatively store credit? But there was a nagging thought in Thomas' mind that the old timer might be keeping too many secrets from prying eyes.
The walk back to the tavern was rather uneventful. No one had stopped to accost them or their beetles. Maybe a pin would puncture them nicely, assuming the illuminating glands were avoided. Or Keystone could cut their heads off with a knife maybe? Thomas could too but he was rapidly becoming attached to the little guys. Or girls, Thomas had no training in sexing beetles. Hopefully the tavern owner Femnal would be fine with having a few ingredients short of gunpowder under his roof and incendiary insects as Thomas walked into the tavern looking for the others. He had his hands full, but spotted Sana and Kyra sitting yonder by a table, having all the silverwork done it seemed, as the day was wearing thin. They still had to prepare a thing or two, but as the daylight slips, they'd best head into that tower before nightfall. With the excitement of a schoolboy presenting show and tell, the sorcerer aptly set the glass vessel down on the table for the women to see. "We've got some Firebeetles. We should able to use their light-emitting glands for a good light source, and uh, if we extract them carefully enough, I might be able to grind their shells down for that potion for later use."
Location: The Apothecary. Interacting with: Satilla, The Merchant of Penance (shopkeeper).
"Yeah, it'll be educational I'm sure." Thomas' somewhat sheepish reply to Satilla who was perfectly oblivious, or perhaps focused on other things than the awkwardness that had just passed over. It was a rather short but fruitful trip, searching out for potions but instead returning with these lovely fire beetles. Shame they'd have to die somehow for their organs to be extracted. Maybe it was possible to drown them? Invert a jars in a large pitcher or something, fill it with water, and then slowly tip the jar slightly to allow the water to escape? something to preserve their hard carapace to be ground down. Maybe Keystone had some experience in gutting things open delicately? Somehow these beauties would have to die, hopefully they lived out good lives. "Okay then, let's head out um, we should meet the others and see if they are ready to explore, or maybe we could go visit a tailor or leather worker for a needle or awl and some string or cord if we wanted to make these into necklaces?"
"Thank you Sir, I'll have to peruse your wares another day, we've got some fire beetles to uh... Well you know." With the last remarks and a wave, Thomas picked up the cage of beetles delicately, careful not to agitate the doomed buggers. Hopefully Satilla could take the box, the materials shouldn't be that difficult to manage, although why the old timer sorted out his own vials instead of using Thomas' was beyond him. The boy had placed his tubes back in his satchel already as his sunny eyes watched the beetles crawling around. There was a strange fondness the sorcerer had for animals, probably from being a farm boy and having a menagerie of them around him, bar cats. Cats weren't a favourite with Thomas, but for the sake of Satilla, he'd put up with Skittles, who... Speaking of where was the familiar feline? "So, anywhere else you'd like to go Satilla? Or should we deal with these beetles first? Not sure if we should prepare them now on or wait for the night?"
Down the rabbit hole, Our depths delving deep, Waking as we stroll, Now walking asleep.
There was only one direction to go. Well there were multiple directions one could attempt to go, yet only two were paths of relatively lesser resistance. And of those two paths, only one was convenient. A pathway down into the belly of the beast, towards the sounds of animals strange. Like a moth to a flame, led by self-immolating curiosity, AdAM peered downwards, finding no signs of guards or sentries to eliminate in the unsecured new area. Then again there were no such guards either guarding the previous room, suggesting that whoever was working there either had no associates or hires to protect what research and development was taking place there, or desired to keep said experiments a secret. Yet who was capable of collecting an array of organics together like this? Even AdAM with his assassination skills would find gathering nine targets, or at least the seven he had confirmed, difficult to do. Of course this was mostly since their captors had required them alive and the warforged left a body count. No one hires an assassin to capture someone alive, that is what a bounty hunter was for. Although it was rather feasible for AdAM 8 to cocoon a target up horrifically bundling them in spiderweb. But the creature tended to not give up its food so willingly to its master. After all, a squirming meal of a corrupt cleric selling pardons was quite filling by the amount of fat the priest had.
Memory banks aside, AdAM took his spiraling steps into the glowing lower room, alit with a grim ménage à trois of candles. There was no darkness to hide in, no way to stealthily slip in to view the menagerie of creatures below. Yet was it needed? Looking around the only perceivable threat was the fairy, the small organic creature cleared in her gear, to AdAM's perception as the stairway's design allowed the mech to survey the entire room with every turn. To which some guarded reaction was given, seeing how the miniscule winged insect was armed, with a child-like mace and shield, chainmail that seemed to be little more than iron handkerchief. A small target difficult to hit, but AdAM had clipped the wings off a fly before with his bolts. Yet without his crossbow, she would have the advantage, to which diplomacy would be the best course of option to avoid having to fight at such disadvantage so soon.
"Salutation: Greetings small winged Organic. Observation: You have found your personal belongings. Inquiry: Are personal effects found on the floors above? Warning: Do not be alarmed if a large arachnoid appears."
Indeed, some webbing noticed from one of the eight mysterious grated doors. And from the brief inspection, there appeared to be silken strands of spider webbing across the bars of one. A placard with AdAM 7 engraved upon the plate, felt by the hand of flesh as ruby lights peered into to see the armored monstrous spider in a state of suspended animation, or perhaps rather a state of inactivity? Spiders at least from what AdAM had observed of his travelling companion did not 'sleep' as humans would, but like its master, entered a state of inactivity. Passing the room containing his pet, once seeing it was relatively safe and unharmed for even a heartless murdering robot could develop attachments to those close to them it seem (that and finding another giant spider to train would be a hassle requiring travel to the Underdark and doing work for drow), the warforged inspected the other rooms. There he found the various ragged creatures all embedded with jewels similar to their probable owners and mounts were sequestered in the rooms save for one empty room, and a strange writing on the slightly opened door that revealed a collection of woody plants. Interesting, and those four corridors awaited invitingly now, but AdAM's priorities returned to freeing his armored spider from its cell.
Now perhaps most riders would approach their friendly animal mount with a greeting or warmth. Perhaps calling the animal by name or offering it some stroking affection, a touch to know its caretaker was here and a whistle of attention. Words exchanged meaninglessly to a spider and a warforged who knew that the spider was most likely incapable of understanding the complex affectless speech AdAM used. Vibration and touch on those silken strands would probably be better, as the mech observed a length of adamantine chain attached to a gleaming metal lock around his captured mount. Had he his tools, perhaps it would be easily picked, but alas his gear was not yet available. Though scanning the room it appeared key dangled beyond a grate, a few feet up from the door, so tauntingly like a lure. Gazing up at the potential solution, AdAM extended his right arm fully to find the key just out of reach, to which he squatted and stored powered into his mechanical and organic leg. There was no difference so far, save for the feeling, no apparent loss in strength or control, the organic pieces seemed to have been melded flawlessly. To which launching himself like a coiled spring at the grate, grasping it in his right hand, and pulling up the rest of his body with the uncanny dexterity of a gymnast taking to the poles. And then plucking the pearl from the oyster with a flesh-covered hand before rotating his body through his hanging arms into a back forward flip that ended with another perfect landing. Yes, if not an efficient sniper, perhaps AdAM could have been a performance artist, yet there was a difference in delivery and being pragmatic.
Now with key in hand, AdAM climbed atop the saddle, causing his mount to stir, shaking confused and appropriately agitated, unsure of the organic leg that it felt resting against its carapace. But a hand placed upon the sensitive hairs, calmed the creature down, a familiar grasp on the reins of its exotic harness stifled the stress. The master had returned, hopefully with food, or food soon. There was nothing in the room for food, and master was not food. Perhaps master shall hunt for prey? The eight eyes staring into the candlelight, armored legs lift its steel-clad body up alongside its master. The tethering chain unlocked by the turn of a key, as master released the spider and the pair reunited as assassin and horror. Now then shall master hunt for food? Fangs dripping with poison ready to sink themselves and gorge on liquefied entrails of master's latest target? Food sounded good, and those eight legs left the webs spun around the room to escape the zoo-like cage it was placed in. Eight hungry eyes watching the fairy in a multifold view. Master was most generous. Food. A giant fly for a giant spider?
Statement: The Unit mounted is AdAM 8. Comment: I will prevent it from considering you as prey. Observation: There is a high probability it may consider you prey. Inquiry: Are the others coming to release their mounts?
Would the fairy bat an eye at the appearance of a flesh-infused android atop a giant spider? Or was it common to see in the realm of fey that insects be used as beasts of burden? What is chaos to the fly after all, is just a meal to the spider. Alas, even more philosophy, to which a being of logic and reason made tabula rasa could indefinitely explore the duality of it all.
Move Action: Descend into lower floor via helical stairs. Passive Perception. Acrobatics = 1d20 + 6 = (15) + 6 = 21, Success, Key get. Animal Handling = 1d20 + 2 = (10) + 2 = 12, Success, Mount calmed. Action: Use key to unchain mount, ride mount. Move action: Escape the Room, ending position near spiraling stairs.
Location: The Apothecary. Interacting with: Satilla, The Merchant of Penance (shopkeeper).
"Thanks Satilla, we'll have to think of a way to uh..." A pause as Thomas communicated his uncertain plans to kill the purchased specimens. Would drowning them work? The cage would be a nice holding tank, at least for the six of them, but they had to extract them one by one. Maybe some scalding water? Although Thomas really didn't want to kill all the beetles, ideally keep two specimens for breeding purposes. But that would require sexing the beetles, of which Thomas was no etymologist or was it entomologist? Then again an etymologist ought to know which they were, so entomologist then. But since the elder refused to state where they were obtained from for business purposes, there goes the idea of finding more buggers to make fire beetle babies and start a successful shop across the street from this undead-troubled ghost-town? "... Extract some beetle juice."
"We'll take all six sir, cage and all. And those other ingredients, if you could, I need to stock up on alchemy supplies. Plus we can do an experiment on the carapaces Satilla." Satilla and Thomas in the lab together? What was this some sort of highschool chemistry class? The afterthought of doing experimental alchemy with Satilla came along with the realization that it was her fingers wrapt over his shoulder. The slightest blush tinged those sunny cheeks thereafter, as Thomas' eyes quickly darted away from Satilla and back to the beetles or Shopkeeper, whichever could conceal his self-consciousness. "But I'll just... I mean anyone can attend if they want to watch us."
A single gold coin produced and set on the counter to pay for the beetles and while waiting for the other ingredients and the price of them not yet delineated by the shopkeep. Some more coins would be placed later, but Thomas was wise enough to keep his nice coinpurse from the old man's view. Their business was done for now, hopefully the shelves would hold more things in stock soon, the man had a crystal gem, maybe he might have something else? Maybe a necklace or bracelet, some jewelry for... Well after Thomas manages to get some loot of value from adventuring, maybe then he could. blushing thoughts aside, the young sorcerer returned to the light matters at hand. "I think that will be all, you see anything you need Satilla?"
And perhaps outside the store, as invoked by Thomas inadvertent apparent calling, somewhere a ghost in black-and-white striped pajamas appeared.
Location: The Apothecary. Interacting with: The Merchant of Menace (shopkeeper), Satilla.
Fire beetles. And not just one, but six. Now Thomas dropped all pretense of getting a decent deal and eyed those beauties with easily discernable awe. Once more that kid in a candy store, or in this case an apprentice in a wizard's shop, those eyes alit with curious wonder, the moment those beetles hit the counter. Each rodent-sized beetle pulsating their glands as they scurried in their confinement. Taking those brightened eyes at a single beetle and watching it crawl from one end to the other of the glass cage, intimately watching with utter fascination. Poor blighters would have to die to make this work, maybe Thomas could keep one alive, keep it as a live specimen? To study of course. Still though a young mage's finger couldn't help but follow one of the insects from the other side of the glass.
"Wow. Six? These are excellent beetles Sir. Where did you acquire them from? These might just work Satilla." A curious boy gave a nod to Satilla, confirming beetles did have the glands the elder spoke of and their properties seemed about right. Or at least what of Thomas could remember reading of them, there were so many insects to account for. One of the more numerous of the animal kingdom, and long when humans are gone, it would be they who inherit the earth. Hopefully Satilla would be the warier of the two given Thomas' seemingly cast off suspicions the moment the beetles were presented with the flare of a showman probably about to con a young man from his money. "And what about the other ingredients? I mean I think I can get away with extracting the gland from the beetle, and crushing the rest of the shell as a powder. I'd need some help of course Satilla, I mean it's a dry potion this time around so it'll be easy."
"It's a shame we have kill one of them. But how much for the lot Sir?" With all the innocence of a man hooked on buying, Thomas finally looked up from his beetles, yes his beetles as if he had already purchased them all. "And for the sulfur, phosphorus and a small gem too if you could be so kind as to measure them out on your scales Sir. I think have the tubes for you..." And with some rummaging, Thomas produced two empty sample tubes from his alchemist's kit, each stoppered with a bit of cork and placed on the table. Hopefully they'd be able to catch that wax shopkeeper too and nab some of her salty Peter.
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