Screw it, I'll show Hampus' Theme.
Earnest Evans Member
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- Earnest Evans 12 yrs ago
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Hampus the Red, Meta-Ridley's Expeditionary Shuttle
Nursing the minor bruise he had gotten from being jolted as the ship took off, Hampus set off down the halls. He guessed that, wherever the engine was, it would be immensely noticeable. He wagered a guess that the engine would be immensely bright and would make incredibly ominous sounds as it worked.
Hampus turned a corner, and felt a constant, dull hum reverberating through the walls. Hampus guessed that this incessant hum belonged to the engine. At least it won't be hard to find it. Just gotta follow the noise, Hampus thought.
Hampus played this unusual game of hide and seek for quite a while, thanks to his wretched sense of direction. Castle Aldrheimr was always clearly signposted, and you could always tell where a class or a party was by the volume of magic surging through the halls, so wizards never bothered to learn basic directions. This neglect severely hampered Hampus' training attempts, and it was certainly impeding him now.
Finally, as the hum grew deafening and rattled through Hampus' bones, he found the engine. It was a truly awesome sight, pulsing and glowing as brightly as the sun. Hampus was mesmerized by the engine; he had never seen something so... so bright before!
Cuban Pete looked critically at Cirno's crude slide. He shrugged, and gave Cirno a resounding thumbs-up. With a quick spritz of his bottle, the ramp was lubed up. Now that Pete had made a crude Slip N' Slide into the portal, he decided to take full advantage of it.
Working up a running start, Pete leaped onto the ramp and rapidly slide down it. With that same disappointing electric crackle, Pete disappeared...
...And reappeared in his ship, still going a fair turn of speed. He slammed right into the wall and was knocked flat on his ass. Pete, in strange psychological accordance with the rules of his game, would be stuck here for a while.
Cuban Pete, feigning shock and awe, leaned over the impromptu ramparts to watch the battle unfold. Sure enough, there were two human figures desperately running away from a giant boar. _Since that muscled fellow hopped down to "watch" the fight, maybe he'll deal with the boar. Maybe he'll get hurt enough for me to have at him, too! Oh, that would be grand!_ Cuban Pete rubbed his hands together menacingly as he thought of all the fun he could get up to with _three_ fresh brains.
Turning back to Cirno and Okuu, Cuban Pete shrugged in an exaggerated display of unsureness. He took his Hand Teleporter out, and showed it to the two. With an over-elaborate hand motion, he pressed a random button on the Teleporter's display. With a familiar sad-sounding electric crackle, a bright-blue portal opened at Cuban Pete's feet. Stepping backwards off the portal, Cuban Pete motioned towards it. Evidently, he wanted them to do... something with the portal.
I hope it's okay if Hampus gets shanghaied onto Meta-Ridley's ship. After all, you can't have an expedition without redshirts!
**Hampus The Red, Meta-Ridley's Ship, Hangar**
Someone was yelling. Someone that Hampus knew he should listen to. Waves of consciousness came flooding back as Hampus realized where he was and who was yelling at him.
"-or I will break your arms and make you do two hundred push-ups! Initiate Hampus, **RESPOND**!"
"Present, sir!" Hampus shouted, as he snapped to attention.
The man who yelled at Hampus, a giant of a drill sergeant with breath like a morgue and a chin as craggy as Scotland, glared at Hampus' previous inattentiveness. After an incredibly uncomfortable pause, the drill sergeant stepped back and addressed Hampus and his fellow Initiates.
"That's all you rats accounted for, then! LISTEN UP, MAGGOTS! You've been granted a _major_ gift from Lord Ridley just by being here! You boys are here to _prove yourself worthy_, in the name of Shadow Eternity! I do _not_ want you rats screwing this up! If you do, I will make damn well sure to keep your eyes intact so you can see what you look like _when I'm done gutting you!_ DO I MAKE MYSELF CLEAR?!"
"Sir, yes, sir!" The Initiates shouted.
"Good! Your current posting will be in the _engine rooms!_ When the engineers ask you to clean out the engines, you damn well better be in the reactor with your own goddamn toothbrush by the time they stop speaking! _If_ you do well, you will be given the glorious opportunity to be the first off the ship and into the meat grinder! Failure to comply with orders will result in _immediate_ termination! DO I MAKE MYSELF CLEAR?!
"SIR, YES, SIR!" The Initiates howled.
"_Diiis-**missed**_!"
Hampus and the four other Initiates he was with scattered. _Oh, dammit!_ Hampus thought, _I don't even know where the engine room is!_ His mind aflutter with all the lovely things his sergeant would do to him if he failed, Hampus hurried along through the halls. If he was lucky, he'd reach the engine room without trouble. Of course, Hampus was _never_ lucky.
In
Massive Multiversal Crossover: Interest Check and Signups
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11 yrs ago
Forum: Casual Interest Checks
Well, physical strength and a couple megayears of combat experience.
In
Massive Multiversal Crossover: Interest Check and Signups
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11 yrs ago
Forum: Casual Interest Checks
Hey, wait, about this Leman Russ character. I've nothing against their... current form, but isn't playing a fucking _Primarch_ a little overpowered? Russ managed to turn away an entire Ork Waaagh! by himself, and even baseline Space Marines (who Russ is to them what a fly is to a human) are above and beyond pushovers. I sincerely hope you can actually play this character properly, otherwise the RP's power balance is _fucked._
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