Illumin0sity

Journey to the East

Per usual, Elann’s actions revealed her answer and intentions withheld in her mind before she spoke in confirmation of it all. Before she spoke she removed herself from the blanket, slipping herself from it entirely and atop it with him. His question was an invitation extended to her to say she could have him and to make love, and be made love to by, him. Whether he wanted to or not, the question would have shaped his answer to be in tune with her own. Should their relationship had been like that, then that would’ve been the case. As it were, any attempts at giving her direct control over his body and actions were spurned or had faltered.

She spoke to confirm as much, leaning down onto him, her breath on his neck as she whispered the same question for him to answer. Noah didn’t answer immediately, forced into a pause by the way her breath rolled down the soft skin of his neck before her lips pressed there deeply. A sharp intake of air came from him as he fought to not shy away from her kiss but to angle his head up for her, granting her further access to the tender place if she so desired to continue. The sensualness was riveting but not overwhelming for the Kelvic. It was enticing the intake of air to come out as a soft and whispering gasp.

“Yes,” he answered in the same breath as she pulled up.

Meeting her gaze with his, his own was void of the usual predatory intent to have and take as what was usual for when they first started laying with one another. He was soft and seemingly vulnerable under her there, perhaps smaller than he ever had been in such situations where they were going to make love. It was an unspoken testimonial to just how safe and secure he felt with Elann, being under her and having her press her lips on his neck. There was a deep sense of trust he was instilling in her in that moment, the night allowing him to shed another layer of the wall long erected against her as a stranger to the deepest and tenderest emotions residing in his core being.

Leaning upwards, he met her lips with his once more, his hands grasping softly at her being beneath the dress though his hands failed to invade the fabric and touch her skin beneath, as much as he wanted to. He urged as much with his look, not saying to hurry up, but asking her to be rid of it so that he could touch and be touched by the bareness of her body. Noah pulled back from the kiss and brought his chin up a small ways, revealing the delicateness that was his throat to her in another display of trust in the situation.

Lately, due to his injury, she had been the one in control when it came to their lovemaking, but Noah thoroughly enjoyed it, just as Elann enjoyed him being a more dominant in the same situation. Naturally he was submissive, living under a dominant male for a large chunk of his life, then binding himself to another dominant figure in Caesarion. Elann was the first chance in which Noah was allowed to be on top, so the speak, and he enjoyed it. He also enjoyed when she took the reins, admiring the strength of a woman he knew she could be. Maybe she could learn to admire herself in such aspects as well?

Journey to the East

Elann complied to his request, moving closer to him to hover over him. She brought up the game, suggesting that since he won he did deserve kisses. He hummed in agreement, smiling slightly as he looked up at her still in their close proximity. She then pressed her heated lips against his. The simple pressing of flesh on flesh was grandly uplifting in this moment, further elevating him up and away from the heavy feelings that once weighed him down. He didn’t forget what he read in Elann’s journal, the memory was there and would remain for the foreseeable future, he let himself be reminded she was making changes and the past was just that. It didn’t need to be dug up, especially if he had wanted to start over from their other slow and sensual night in the tent, the one preceding their morning’s loving.

Her hands went to the places he detailed long ago, going up his unafflicted side slow and light to bring goosebumps to his skin and a spiking in his heart. She spurred him to bring his own hands onto her, one moving to reside on the side of her neck, sliding up to caress and maintain a loose grasp behind her ear, his palm hot to the touch eventually being ebbed out by her cooler temperature. The other hand found her waist underneath the blanket but still above her dress. The fingers favored the small of her back, holding her in that spot loosely as well.

The kiss was sensual and he sought to maintain that, being careful with his lips but remaining physical, as if straddling the line between passion and gentle love. Noah thoroughly enjoyed their new interactions allowed since their marriage, the kissing and her openness to his public displays of affection, ones that were once hesitantly went along with by her in Syliras before their marriage. The more he thought about it the more he realized they never really said they were going steady or were more than friends until their marrying vows. It had grown naturally in the way that became obvious to even Matilda that feelings for one another were developing between the couple with each passing day they spent with one another. Perhaps it was destined from the day they went to the orphanage together, fates aligning to force them into one another’s paths and lives.

They parted naturally to breathe, his inner being warmed and enjoying the touch and taste of her on his lips, of which he licked. As he looked at her he could feel an almost magnetic attraction to her gaze and being, using the quiet love in his heart for her to bring on feelings of want for her to remain in his space whether they had sex here or not. He didn’t care what would happen after their breath was caught, he knew he would enjoy whatever came.

Noah’s gleaming lips parted to let loose a question Elann may have not expected. “Do you want me?” he asked, leaving the way for them entirely up to her. Sensing what he regarded as desire within her, he asked the question to show he wasn’t utterly oblivious to her wants anymore.

Journey to the East

“Yes,” he answered. He didn’t have a problem understanding her writing or the way she structured it. Her calculated reading voice and the fact they were linked emotionally allowed him to glean what he was supposed to feel, or rather, what she felt in the moment she was recalling. The longer they were bonded the deeper they were being connected and the easier it would be to come back from falters and slip ups. As it were, their bond was still young, much older than the one with Caesarion, but young in comparison to the one his mother shared with Lanna. Though they couldn’t read one another’s minds, they would arrive to the point of being able to communicate without speech altogether.

“I do,” he answered again. “I like kissing you.” Though he remembered Caesarion’s kisses as well, and it was the reason for him liking the action, the enjoyment he drew from Elann’s kisses was unparalleled and far outshined Caesarion’s own. Even if he were upset, either with her or not, a kiss could be rid of uncomfortableness and discomfort relatively quickly and easily with a simple action.

The next recitation came to his simmering delight. His eyes were on her again as his mind churned to produce the image she described, walking outside with the wagons and the fluffy clouds. He imagined himself over her as she walked, seeing the clouds more upclose and personal. She shifted to the mountains and he imagined those too, though at a much closer distance. Being in Zeltiva he could see them from the rooftops and feel the very cold breezes as they would blow down from that way from time to time when they weren’t blowing in from the bay. The squirrels and crow came next, of which he imagined as well, this time planting himself beside Elann in the memory as they both watched the squirrels chattering with their twitching tails and rapid movements, how they scampered up and down tree trunks, leaping from the branches to the next tree. He saw them go back down to the ground where the crow came and scared them away, probably attempting to either join in on the fun or terrorize the rodents for its own enjoyment.

Noah drew his arm in back to him and tucked it, bringing himself to roll over his good side to lie on his back, closer to her but not under the blanket like she was. He was still dressed in the trousers from yesterday’s evening. As he settled on his back his face contorted into that of a pained wince, his nose scrunching as his top lip curled up at an angle.

With the two passages she had reinstilled his faith in the journal harboring goodness as well as otherwise darkly recounted memories, though they were written in the way of neutrality. He was feeling better inside, the image of the playing squirrels lifting his mood all the more. Noah brought his hand up and ran the back of his fingers softly against her arm.

“I like when you read to me too,” he said, his hand falling down over his chest, resting over where his heart beat. “It makes me happy.”

He lingered for a moment, looking up at her. “Kiss me.”

Journey to the East

Noah listened to Elann’s otherwise soothing voice. He wasn’t on edge but he was discomforted and sought to regain comfort through Elann’s speech. The words came, his gaze stark on her and unmoving, exchanging looks between her lips and eyes as they move across the words. At the mention of his lips he lifted his head and brought his hand from underneath, touching along his bottom lip as he tried to imagine himself in the scene Elann described, transcribed from memory. He knew he was a fairly quiet sleeper but it was odd being told as much, especially since he was so deeply asleep in the moment she was recounting.

She talked about the butterfly, to which he could imagine vividly. They weren’t a common sight in Syliras, nothing as brightly tuned as what he imagined she saw on that day. If they were as brightly tuned and did come to Syliras, Noah didn’t notice, probably thinking everything looked drab and grey compared to how vibrant and colorful things were out here and in Zeltiva. She then talked about him waking up, of which he had no recollection whatsoever. He didn’t like that, not knowing when woke up and spoke groggily and incomprehensible.

Elann finished and looked to him, meeting the gaze that never left her. His hand was still by his lips, the fingers resting on the bottom one, pulling it slightly off and down to the side. He was quiet in his consideration of her unspoken inquisition, asking him what he thought about the passage read.

“Can you read me another one?” he requested, moving his hand to stretch out between the two of them, resting there in the middle of them as his eyes softly asked the question again, looking between the journal and Elann’s gaze.

“You are going to write about my kisses like that?” he wondered afterwards, before she could start on the next passage. “You said they were stronger than a drink?” He wondered if she had a stiff drink before.

Her words didn’t fall on deaf ears, him just bringing it up now since he was feeling better in mind since she read to him. At the thoughts, his hand crept closer to her still, his gaze falling to her lips because he wanted to kiss her then. The disappointment in his bond was being uplifted and turning into the quiet desire for her person and touch again. The buzzing joy still had yet to come, he had been alleviated though.

Journey to the East

Elann started her explanation as Noah lied there and stewed in his thoughts. What she thought was a childish notion was a survival mechanism in his mind, both as a Kelvic and as a bondmate. Knowing what she thought allowed him to navigate around evoking anymore of her ill thoughts and would keep her sated, hopefully. It made sense in his mind. As a Kelvic, it let him watch out for any other telltale signs of repeated misunderstanding and unintentional harm on her side. Seeing more made it hard to get to the point of forgiveness with her, a state he had yet to reach despite their good vibes that evening.

She tried to compare writing in her journal to his art, asking if it was a part of him or if it helped him remember events. She seemed to pause more, attempting to lighten what he read by saying there were also pages of goodness in the journal.

“I don’t know how to explain my drawing,” he admitted truthfully. It had been a long time since he had drawn anything, Elann being the first thing he had drawn since he last put the book down.

He tried to draw when he first arrived in Syliras but he couldn’t concentrate on anything long enough to get a full picture out. Elann had seen the partly done pieces in the more recent parts of the book, they were no more than sketches and outlines of vague and indistinguishable items. He remembered what started him drawing in the first place and what kept him drawing, they weren’t probably what Elann thought though.

He looked at the journal again, reaching out for it despite not wanting much to do with it at this point. He pushed it towards her across the floor. “Can you read me one of them?” he asked in reference to the apparent good parts of her journal.

Journey to the East

As poetic as Elann’s explanation of Noah’s kisses were, they didn’t draw much of a reaction from him. He had intended to read while giving her his ears but he was distracted by the words, even the smudged ones he tried to read, lingering on them for a moment longer than the others. It was a mood-ruiner, what he read in her journal detailing her emotions and thoughts after their fight. He hadn’t forgotten his own words or how he felt saying them or how he felt after the fact, the passage was a bitter reminder that he disliked. Before he set the book down, as he was reading the two pages, the buzzing sense of happiness faded away to be replaced by growing discomfort.

Setting the book down, he asked his question, to which she answered she would maybe write that night. Given that the night went leagues better than the passage he read he figured she wouldn’t have anything ill-thought to write about, he knew he didn’t want to read it, whatever she wrote.

She brought her hands up into his hair and he looked to her, watching her go about her motions before returning the kiss she gave him. Though there wasn’t a card game to distract the Kelvic from her, there were the new creeping thoughts in mind that were uneasing him from the current situation. He did regret reading the journal even though Elann had said it was allowed, perhaps encouraging him to when she pushed it towards him. It was how he took it anyway. That wasn’t to say he thought his new feelings as her fault because it was his own action which brought the feelings on. Either way, they were heavy.

Elann slid from him and took a place underneath one of the blankets. He retraced her hands’ movements in his hair with his own. Noah reached forward and adjusted the deck of cards aimlessly on the floor before turning and then slowly moving out to lay down on his stomach, his hands tucked under his head as he looked at Elann and her soft smile.

“Why do you write in it?” he wondered innocently, a question brought on by what he had read but asked in the way that was void of ulterior motive. “I don’t understand.”

Journey to the East

Extending the journal towards Elann did little since she ended up pushing it more towards him to give him permission to read it. He still didn’t act though, only bringing both hands over it to flip it around and around as she explained what she was going to write about in the new journal started once they got on the road to Zeltiva. He hummed to acknowledge each point, the last hum dying off as his eyes dragged from the journal to her.

“My kisses?” he questioned softly. “What do they feel like?” The second question was more in prompting, prodding for an explanation.

Noah went to open the journal then, cracking it open near the middle at blank pages. He didn’t intend to read just yet, using his thumb to flip through the pages towards the written-on portions until he got to the beginning of it all.

“Do you write every night?” Noah was unsure if he had missed her writing or just dismissed it, wondering if any of it happened while he was sleeping because of the tea or just being flighty with his attention span.

Flicking through the pages still, he landed on a tear stained one, the distorted paper sticking out with it’s smudged ink apparent against the neatly placed scripture. The automatic tilt of his head came as he investigated with keen eyes. He drew quiet, eyes going over the blobbed ink and tear stains before reading the writing itself. Noah’s bottom lip was drawn into his mouth, held there by his teeth as he read on a little longer before closing the journal altogether. He leaned forward a bit, putting the journal back on the floor before them.

“Are you writing tonight?” he asked lowly.

Journey to the East

“I know,” Noah chimed vainly.

Guess was a game that could be played for hours, until a certain number of points, or until the deck was done. It was often that Noah and his siblings would play until the deck was done then start over, just because it passed the most time when there was a large chunk of it to kill. It was one of Noah’s favorites because of the random factors, a well shuffled deck yielded enough volatility that nothing could be cheated and gloating could be punished by a suddenly bad stream of luck. Elann was his bondmate so he wasn’t attempting to be provocative in his gloating, simply teasing and aiming to draw reactions from Elann based in the playful nature.

The game wound down still, each hand offering a point to either of them, keeping Noah ahead by the few he was by. It seemed he was just lucky this night and he was enjoying it. He was sharing something meagerly personal about himself with Elann, his love for simple card games and games in general. It was small but it meant a great deal to him because they reminded him of Zeltiva and his younger years as a juvenile.

In the end it was him who won as they tallied up their suits. He showed her a tooth bearing grin once their totals had been announced, showing he took pleasure in the win and in teasing her because of it. If Elann remembered Aimee speaking about Noah’s mischievous behavior before she’d know this was but a small display of how devious he could be. She would perhaps recount the tale about Noah stealing Aimee’s cherished toy and putting it on the roof because she couldn’t get up there. Even if the wolf did, he would fly off to the next one, revelling in the teasing of his older sister.

He collected the suits and brought them back into a deck, shuffling through them per habit, going through the motions before reaching for the band which bound the cards together and rewrapping it around the deck to set aside once more. The game was done and he had won, now he was waiting for the next phase of their late night stint.

Noah looked around the pallet they were on in search of the journal. Once found, he reached for it and brought it out in front of the both of them, favoring it closer to Elann. “Did you start another one?” he asked. “You gave the others to Aimee.”

Like before, he hadn’t cracked it open though his curiosity begged to invade whatever was inside. The staunch want to remain in Elann’s good graces prevented it though, forcing him to show some self-control over the situation whereas he would usually, and easily, give into the wants of his inquisition.

Journey to the East

Noah nodded and hummed to acknowledge Elann’s words. He thought it interesting she still wanted a shop, regardless of what it sold. He didn’t know how her experience in the deserts of Mizahar would transfer to the bustling civilization that was Zeltiva. That was mostly because he didn’t know if the Benshiran haggled with currency or bartered goods, the former being the most common form of business exchange in Zeltiva and the latter being for more personal exchange between neighbors, thus rarer, especially for those who needed the coin in order to trade in the markets of Zeltiva.

It wasn’t Noah’s intention to provoke Elann’s passion in any way. He simply meant to reenact the words and teach how they were to be said given the situation. He was really focused on the idleness of the conversation, the game, and their closeness. Fratava as a language just harbored much of the emotion he didn’t display easily and was a language he preferred to speak. As a language, each word had its meanings, or multiple given the context, and each word was said with it’s own flit of emotion, the tiny flares combining into the flame that was the language spoken in full fluidity. It could be loud, hot, and angry, or it could be soft, sensual, and romantic as just seen.

“I wouldn’t,” he replied, not thinking himself much of a predator if he couldn’t fight in the slightest.

In his mind, in order for a predator to reach old age they would need to be able to fight and survive to that age. As for people he revered in that regard, his mother and father were at the top of the list, both masterful hunters in their own regard, having yet to reach the end of their lives. Since they were the ones who taught him how to hunt, it was only natural to regard them so highly. He sought to be as valiant as they were, and even though he was accomplished in hunting, he was far from the mastery of his father or mother. None of his siblings had reached their mastery at all, especially now since they were all so involved with the workings of human society, Noah being the last to be fully dragged into it with the bonding to Elann.

Noah, looking down, waited for Elann to flip the card. Another point was scored for him and he smirked as Elann kissed the corner of his mouth. The card was a nine and she guess lower, to which he hummed as if saying it wouldn’t be her assumption. He brought his hand out over the deck and pulled at the card, hesitating to build whatever suspense would be - if any at all - before flipping it; a ten was revealed, to which he gave a closed-mouth chuckle.

“I told you I was going to win,” he reaffirmed playfully. “I’m going to guess lower too.”

Noah leaned in and kissed her on the corner of her mouth in reply, as if asking for her to remain affectionate despite the loss. He even lingered there, planting another peck in quick succession before pulling back enough to see her clearly, though his sights didn’t remain on her, flicking down to see the next card she drew.

Journey to the East

Noah didn’t know Elann’s skill level in comparison to what the professional clothing shops of Zeltiva produce. From what he saw of Elann, he knew he liked what she made, but he could’ve been utterly biased because it was she who made it. Arbitrarily, he could totally dislike something that was otherwise deemed beautiful simply because Elann didn’t make it. It was how his mind worked as a bondmate, unless it was corrected in the right way. Going on, Noah didn’t care for clothing much because he didn’t care to wear them. It was only by Elann’s urging that he even wore as much as shorts when walking around the camp. Then again, should it have not been for her inability to traverse the world quickly, he would’ve been in Zeltiva a week ago.

“You want to open your own shop one day?” he questioned off of Elann revealing her discomfort. That was a curiosity in his mind because Caesarion had wanted the same thing when they would’ve arrived in Riverfall. His interest was piqued, told by the inflection in his voice.

Elann complimented him again in a way, expressing her enjoyment over him being able to fight. He thought it was a given since he was an accomplished predator. Fighting, essentially, was in his bones and feathers. What was both funny and intriguing was she thought it sexy of him being able to fight. He naturally related her thoughts to her previous statement of the men of her tribe using spears and axes. Since she did have her own desire of him to be more manlike, like the men of her people, as much was clear by now, it was easy to make the connection.

“I would be a terrible predator if I couldn’t fight,” he joked, not totally disregarding her interest in him, but moving on because the joke was the first thing that came to mind.

Inside, Noah was on the fence about divulging that it was Caesarion who introduced him to the spear, encouraging him to learn how to fight in his human form just as well as in his eagle’s form. Boxing was some extension of that but the choice to learn hand-to-hand combat was Noah’s own. Caesarion had also encouraged the use of the bow, of which Elann used now. The bow in conjunction with his Stormwarden abilities would’ve been an awesome sight according to Caesarion. It went to show many other things about Noah were still developed by Caesarion’s influence, just not the want to be a normal man.

Elann guessed low, causing Noah to reach into her space again to flip the top card. He had scored his own point with the previous card coming up as an eight but he didn’t revel in it, partly distracted because of Elann’s fluttering closeness and piquing interest in him. Flipping the card over, it came up as a thirteen, making Noah smile a little. He hummed happily and in teasing, his smile broadening a bit.

“We say drracovata or vata,” he explained, the Fratava slipping from his lips in the deeply romantic way it sounded with little effort. The r's were rolled effortlessly from the back of his throat into the a, the rest whispered breathily to denote the intent of the word. “Or, ona toné nu chrroso laoché, ‘you make my heart burn.’” Diving from basic Common to the sensualness of Fratava’s romantics was beyond apparent, Noah’s voice even dipping deeper into a low whisper to mimic the way it was said when attempting to lure someone into another’s boudoir with sweet nothings.

“Lower,” he guessed, knowing there was no where else for the direction to go.