Jocelyn slept dreadfully the entire night, constantly tossing and turning. At one point she even thought she felt someone messing with her hair, bolting upright in her bed with her eyes wide and her breath coming in heavy, panicked gasps. She’d climbed out of her bed and walked through the house, making sure all the door were locked and that her brother was in his bed and not hiding under bed to mess with her. After she assured herself that everything and everyone was as it should be, Jocelyn still could not find her way back to sleep. She’d stared up at her ceiling for hours on end, her mind curiously blank and ears straining to pick up any sounds that did not fit into the usual groans and creaks of the house settling. She was up out of bed before her alarm clock went off, shuffling herself into the shower in order to even be able to function. Even after she got dressed, threw her hair up and trudged down the stairs to get some toast and orange juice, Jocelyn was still feeling off kilter. She couldn’t shake the idea that there was someone else in the house. Several checks in all the rooms, and a double check on the locked doors could not convince her that she was imagining things.
She was unusually quiet when Aidan drove her to school that morning, remaining silent when her brother tried baiting her into one of their usual playful arguments. “You alright?” He asked right before he pulled up to her school, Jocelyn’s head turning briefly to nod her reply before turning back to stare out the window. When it was time for her to get out of the car, Aidan called out to her. “Try and have a good day, alright?” She nodded again, unable to vocally respond to him. She was too tired, and too stressed to come up with one of her witty retorts, and if she was honest with herself, she just didn’t feel like it. She felt off, her mind dampened by fatigue and her thoughts sluggish. It wasn’t a feeling that she enjoyed at all, and it took all of her might not to grab her phone and call her brother to come pick her back up. She didn’t want to be there, but unfortunately for her she knew she was stuck there for the rest of the day.
Math class was always a struggle, but that morning it was absolute torture. Tony tried talking to her, but she would only shake her head and wave him back toward his seat, not wanting to get into a discussion about what was going on with her. How was she supposed to explain that she was losing her mind? People already thought she was on the border line of crazy; they’d lock her away like her mother if they knew what was going on inside her mind.
The next few classes weren’t any easier, her eyes threatening to droop if she remained sitting still for more than a few seconds. In each classed she asked to use the bathroom, heading into the girls room to splash icy cold water on her face in hopes that it would help her sit through the rest of class without drifting off to sleep. Luckily for her, the usual squad of prissy little princesses were surprisingly quiet, even after their little scuffle the day before. They’d passed her in the hallway, glaring angrily and peering down their noses at her, but Jocelyn had only rolled her eyes and ignored them. She didn’t have the energy to fight, and she knew if they decided to gang up on her today she’d end up with her face beat into the tiled floor before a teacher could come to the rescue. That didn’t mean she was going to cower away when they walked past. She stood her ground, bracing herself for a shove, and when nothing came she moved on, heading to chemistry and her almost forgotten apology to Tora.
Seeing said boy sitting at their table, Jocelyn drew in a sharp breath, hoping that he wasn’t going to make her words of apology difficult. The wink proved her wrong, and she knew she was going to be in for a long class period. He was upbeat while she was dragging. Her retorts were going to be slow in coming, and he would quickly pick up on her lethargy and take advantage of it, not to mention the apology which felt like some huge sign of weakness. Still, she did regret the way he’d left her house, and she honestly couldn’t deal with the guilt that came along with the fact that it had been entirely her fault.
Dropping her backpack on the ground, she dropped into her seat, twisting around to face Tora. “Before you even start, let me say that I’m sorry for chasing you out of my house. That doesn’t mean that I like you, but it was rude and I apologize.” She huffed out a heavy sigh, quickly turning back around to face the front of the classroom. “But don’t even think for a second that I want you at my house. All I need is for my aunt to start thinking I have some boy interested in me. Next thing I know she’s buying me makeup and dresses and forcing me to go to school dances. I want no parts of that at all.” Satisfied that she’d done what she set out to do, Jocelyn lowered her head down to the desk and closed her eyes, no longer possessing the energy to remain sitting upright. She didn’t care if she slept through class. As far as she was concerned, they were lucky she’d even showed up at school that day. She could only hope that Tora wouldn’t give her a hard time, but if he did, she wanted to have enough energy to dish out exactly what he dealt.