Prince

Naruto: Birth of a Better Generation

Alright, Lilly, I literally just saw you go on another Naruto roleplay to ask if your character was generic after I said she was without even explaining why I said that.

You may not roleplay here. Leave.

Naruto - Legend of the Bijuu's - Part I - OOC

When I used the term generic, I was explaining that you put no effort into making Okani fit my setting. She is a Naruto character. She is a fine Naruto character. But, she was not a Birth of a Better Generations character, and that's all I was stating. I repeatedly explained this.

Naruto: Birth of a Better Generation

1) You may.
2) No Inuzuka has been shown using a nature release and they're mostly combat oriented. I literally just made a character with only 4 non-Academy jutsu and no nature release as of now. If I can do it, you can, too. Develop one later.

Naruto: Birth of a Better Generation

Kino had graduated sixth in the first class and was only beat out by previous fighters from the resistance or shinobi from clans. He had easily earned his spot in Division A, and had proof of such via his note from Shin Uzumaki. It had arrived at his Uncle's not too long before and sent the household into hysterics. Kino had a note from the Jounin Commander? The idea wasn't absurd, but it was definitely some excitement. Kino disregarded it, despite the special meal provided for him; Kino could never turn down the shrimp and steak dinners his aunt made, but he could easily convince himself that his uncle only wanted recognition for pushing him as a shinobi.

Kino spent the last few minutes he had before leaving out with his brother. Of all the people who congratulated him, he knew his brother meant it. Kino strove to be the shinobi he thought his brother could have been, if he wasn't paralyzed. His brother was always strong and smart, and at this point still is the latter, albeit in regular classes. Kino, as he did for most of his life, pushed himself to be good enough for two, and thus far had always received his brother's praise. With that confidence backing him, Kino had no fears regarding who he was set out to meet. He was not to be assigned a Jounin leader, but instead two Chuunin, alongside himself. The idea that he would fight alongside two Chuunin made him believe that his mentors felt he would be a Chuunin soon, or that he didn't need the extra protection. Either way, Kino was set.

In his letter, Kino was given a name and pictures; they were of the two he was instructed to find prior to meeting Shin. They would be his superiors and his team was made given special circumstances, or so said the letter. He knew neither of the people; just that one was an Uchiha and both were Chuunin. Regardless, it took little time for Kino to find at least one of them. Jhino was already in the small crowd, and Kino had no qualms in addressing him. "Jhino! I think that's how you say your name!" Kino half-shouted from behind him. If Jhino were to turn to see or greet Kino, Kino would have retorted with a bow. "I am Utaka Tsukino. Just Kino, tho. I am to be part of your new team."

Naruto: Birth of a Better Generation

No, those are just traits.

Naruto: Birth of a Better Generation

a) I'm not looking for anything so-well previously defined that it cannot adequately fit in this setting. Just because this is a Naruto theme does not mean that a Naruto-character will fit in.

b) I don't mind you using character concepts. But, understand, if I have to choose between the integrity of the setting and your character, you won't get in.

I cannot emphasize enough that this is not just a Naruto-setting. Every single revamp of your character ignored that. There was a fucking dictator that took over the entire Shinobi world, killed tens of thousands, purged most Shinobi, almost brought an end to Shinobi in general, controlled six of nine Bijuu, completely hid one of them. There are elements in this roleplay ranging from the fact that Sai wasn't entirely a terrible dictator to the fact he was the reason there are so few clans now. Every single clan is in a weakened state. Politics are weak. Trade is weak. The entire world is rebuilding and a lot of it is asking if the revolution was even worth it.

Naruto: Birth of a Better Generation

My advice is to start over with a Genin around the age of 12. I am not letting you have a Jounin as you had ample opportunity to alter your character to make her suitable as well as ask me questions regarding anything you (obviously) didn't understand. I simply do not feel that you deserve to be allowed a Jounin, and even if every single roleplayer here disagreed with me, it wouldn't alter my decision. I gave you my verdict. Make a Genin; you have like seven to view as examples.

Naruto: Birth of a Better Generation

@Big Sister AM: Your character seems fine, but I do have two issues. In her history, it said she took to a "sword class" at the academy. Now, the Shinobi Academies did not exist, but I believe you could squeeze by in saying she took a Kendo class at the regular Academies setup by Sai, as it would be common practice and plausible. Secondly, in her traits, I dislike the 'extent' she can sense. Stating "to the last drop" is almost like giving her Karin's ability, except she's a Genin. Just weaken it a little bit, but I'll let you use it to your advantage later. All it does it make her a sensor-nin and give her slightly better chakra control.

Naruto: Birth of a Better Generation

LillyDove said Her mother eventually found her, in tears hiding under a tree and decided to stay with her until she was alright. Okani told her mother that it was all her fault, they would never have left if she didn't take to Genjutsu and her mother promptly told her that in order to honor his sacrifice that she would need to become a Genjutsu master in Konoha. However her confidence had been dashed and she wasn't sure that she could do that, but her mother insisted.

Em rolling in the Academy and trying hard to measure up, failing some of the times as she wasn't a born fighter, being one who preferred to keep to the side lines. She graduated when she was 10 being the top Genjutsu user in her class, figuring out that if she needed to keep in the side lines than her own Jutsu's were needed, she set to work on developing them.

In the next coming years, she perfected her three Rose Jutsu's and went into the finals of the Chuunin exam, despite her hard work, she became a Chuunin the next year and it took her five years to become a Genjutsu master at Joinin Level.

You are only slightly better at this point. It has only been like a year and a half since the fall of Sai. Literally, there were NO Shinobi Academies. She could not have graduated to become a Genin. There were no Chuunin exams. She could not have been promoted. Shinobi earned their ranks in the Resistance.

Prince said Fifteen years past. Most clans were purged, shinobi were all-but a myth and the people had been lulled into their new lives. Sai ruled each major village using a clone of himself, and was working on improving his society at this point.

I may not have screamed it out at you, but it is literally stated in the description that Shinobi were no longer being trained. Others have came and asked me what the time frame is, so there is no reason you could not have. I do not feel like you are reading my setting and I don't care how much work you think you're putting into your character, it's only a fraction of the work I put into formatting this specific setting - to which it feels like you're ignoring.

You are not designing a character for Birth of a Better Generations. You are designing a character fit to the general Naruto theme, and this isn't a general Naruto roleplay. This has more elements to it that you cannot just ignore, and for that reason I am no longer allowing you to make a Jounin. I feel that you have overwhelmingly failed to meet the criteria I have repeatedly stated, use the example given in an actual approved Jounin or even follow my advice.

Additionally, why would she blame herself for the death of her brother due to learning genjutsu? That makes no sense. There are a bunch of reasons to self-blame, but you didn't even give me one. It seems like you were just attempting to add an emotional layer to the story that was simply weak.

Overall, she is not approved. Overall, I'm getting frustrated. I will not hold your hand and help you through creating a character. I will help you with any questions asked, but you haven't even made that effort. My final verdict is that you will make a genin, like everyone else, and if that is not suitable for you, you may leave.

Naruto: Birth of a Better Generation

LillyDove said
I think I changed enough of her history and removed the OP techniques, I hope this is suitable to you.

It's really not.. I see no efforts for you to be part of this roleplay. Your character is a generic Naruto-themed character with no single quality that stands out to place her in this setting. I don't feel like you understand what is trying to be done here, and I surely don't think you realize your history contradicts itself.

Her father is a semi-wealthy Genjutsu master. Means he's a Shinobi. Why couldn't her mother afford healthcare? Also, you use generic medical terms without even knowing what they mean. If she was afflicted by a disease caused by a pandemic, she wouldn't be chronically ill. Her illness would be acute and severe.

I seriously cannot emphasize enough that your character is not built for this roleplay.