Misha's heated gaze snapped out of focus at Brick's motion. She stared down at the cup, wondering how the Rabins were able to afford such nifty and high quality dishes. Nonetheless, she did not trust the steaming, tinted water, so instead of drinking it, she simply stared suspiciously into the mug. Shaking her head, she glanced back up at Kianna and shrugged sheepishly. "Do we look like we need tea?"
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please be gentle w/ the cat
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Kianna clenches her jaw as Misha spoke. She nods slightly. "I hope the Broms are what you hoped for." She locks her eyes on the flames to save herself from looking at Misha. She didn't know if she should feel... happy? Sad? Angry? Kianna just knew she wished things had happened in another way were they could have a least made it out as friends. She sighs softly as the heat from the fire warmed her entirely. "I'm sorry I suggested to bring you back as a prisoner."
Misha dropped her hand to the ground and began tracing invisible patterns in the dirt and bits of ash below her to distract herself. She shrugged dismissively. "We are enemies.. after all. You gotta protect what's yours." She summoned the courage to lift her eyes to Kianna's face, outlined in the soft light of the fire.
Kianna glances over at her from over her arm. "Do you ever miss me?" She asks softly, not looking her in the eyes. She hugs her knees tightly before Misha could reply, not wanting to hear her answer. It could go any which way. She inwardly hoped no one was watching - or listening for that matter - to their exchange. Her eyes lingered on Misha for a few more moments before she returned them to the flames.
Misha's breath hitched. Her gaze moved to Kianna for a fraction of a second before drifting upwards to the steady stream of smoke and ash flowing from the flames, then back to the coals. She could feel the heat on her bare arms, but her blood seemed frigid and infinitely slow. Her teeth cut into her bottom lip, drawing blood before she could choke out a quiet reply. "Yeah. All the time."
Kianna sat down and pulled her knees to her chest. She watched the fire as she ignored Misha. Her eyes followed the dancing flame as she listened for Misha to day anything, even if she knew she wouldn't. Should I be sorry? Did I genuinely fuck up? Were we that terrible? Kianna thought of the months that Misha had stayed with them. Sure, things could be intense, but why wouldn't they be? How could the Broms be any better than them? Kianna shook her head slightly.
Misha raked her nails across the top of her hand, trying to distract herself from Kianna's avoidant form, but she couldn't help herself. She glanced down and caught sight of her silhouette in the firelight. With a soft sigh, Misha bent down and joined her, keeping a safe distance between them. She couldn't bring herself to lift her eyes from the hot, red coals as she said softly, "Kianna... I think I am sorry."
Kianna shrugged once more before replying. "Say whatever you like. I don't care anymore." She fought to keep from crying, and kept her eyes on the fire. Why did things have to be this way? Maybe if you acted like you regret it, at least for my sake. As if you missed me. Kianna felt Misha's anger from where she was sitting and sighed.
Misha turned away from her, her face burning. She went to say something - anything! - but she couldn't force her mouth to move. Maybe there's nothing to say. She wouldn't believe that. Every time she thought about Kianna, a million words ran through her head. Anger. Regret. Betrayal. A pang of doubt that she had ever made the right choice when she woke up in the middle of the night and found herself as alone as ever. She wanted to tell her all of those things, but she couldn't bring herself to say anything at all.
Kianna just shrugs. She didn't have enough energy to fight her. The river fiasco had sapped her of all her strength. "You're right, how could I have been so naive. I'm the one in the wrong." She turns back to the fire. "I hope it was good while it lasted." She mutters, loud enough for only her to hear. It was for me... Kianna thought to herself as she gazed into the flames. She didn't care if Misha replied or not at this point.
Her bitterness unraveling, Misha struggled to keep her composure. She tried to force fond memories of their shared past out of her brain. If she could just stop herself from thinking about them talking together, and holding each other, and promising - briefly, honestly - to be there for each other when no one else was.. Misha blinked hard to try to distract herself. She stared blankly at Kianna, then glanced at the fire. "Do you want me to say I made a mistake? That I regret everything and I'm gonna crawl back here and everything will be perfect again? 'That what you want?"
Kianna just shook her head. "Whatever, Misha." She bit the inside of her cheek to distract her from how angry she felt. She didn't want to lose control of the situation. Kianna sighed heavily and ran her fingers through her hair before turning to her again. "Sorry that we're terrible people. We'll never drag you down again," Kianna smiled sweetly at Misha, but her eyes were cold. She just couldn't show her how much hurt she felt. She'd rather die.
Misha shook her head slowly, glaring at Kianna the entire time. "I didn't want this, y'know. I mean, you were like my only friend here!" Or with the Broms, she thought, but she wouldn't dare admit it. "It's not like I did all this just to hurt you. Shockingly, not everything is my fault." She turned to the side and crossed her arms.
Kianna glared at Misha. "That's not what I meant and you know it." She remained where she was and watched the Brom. "Then tell me why. What made you think they were any better? Did I do something that made you make the choice?!" Kianna was practically snarling at this point. It was a miracle she hadn't lunged at the girl alreadym
Misha recoiled. "It was me. Not you!" She held her place for a moment, then broke into bitter, self-deprecating laughter. "That's so cliche." She put her hand to her head in exasperation. "Why?" She stared at Kianna. "Because I'm a damn bad person. And I was sick of feeling like I was dragging everybody down. So I went somewhere they'd leave me alone."
"But you know what he did to me!!" Kianna snarls, eyes glaring. "I understand how you felt. I really do! But you fucking," She looks down at the ground to compose herself. She was shaking at this point, "you fucking went to them. Fabine of all people. You meant so much to me..." she trails off and looks away to fight back tears. Misha didn't understand. She didn't. And that hurt Kianna the most.
Misha stood her ground, trying to hide emotion from spreading across her face. She wanted nothing more than to fall into rage and avoid the conversation altogether, but now she was faced with Kianna - who she had tried to avoid - upset. Misha almost accepted her words, almost swallowed her pride, but she cut herself off a moment before. She clenched her fists and glared at the other girl. "Yeah, right! I'm all out to hurt you. And now I'm over getting it on with Fabine because I hate you so much."
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