[OOC] The White Island Prophecies

[Cath]

Yes Milord.
Nice map by the way, very artistically drawn.

[Cath]

Grr, another double post.
*puts £1 in the doublepost charity box*

[Joos]

Catharyn said
Nice map by the way, very artistically drawn.

This makes me feel good

[Cath]

However, since the Great Ocean is allegedly empty; the map could have benefited from being zoomed in a tad more? That way, you might even have been able to fit some cities on there.

[Joos]

I have three words for you. Work in progress. :)

[Cath]

Yay :) How exciting.
I didn't notice a CS; is there anything specific i need to add?

[CraftWork]

I would like to toss my hat in the ring as a player. I'm interested in The Miner's Apprentice, is there anything else I should know about the world that'll help my CS writing?

[CraftWork]

I would like to toss my hat in the ring as a player. I'm interested in The Miner's Apprentice, is there anything else I should know about the world that'll help my CS writing?

[Joos]

Hi CraftWork. Well, most of what you need to know is in the first post. In particular, I direct your attention to the "Peoples of the Ethnoi" section and look for the Gurgs, the culture to which the Miner's apprentice belongs to.

CraftWork and Catharyn - I need a post as a character application. A reasonably long post, about 5-6 paragraphs written from the point of view of your chosen character. I want to know how you write and how you can imagine new elements. I want to know that you can take a story and make a new one with it.

[Joos]

Hi CraftWork. Well, most of what you need to know is in the first post. In particular, I direct your attention to the "Peoples of the Ethnoi" section and look for the Gurgs, the culture to which the Miner's apprentice belongs to.

CraftWork and Catharyn - I need a post as a character application. A reasonably long post, about 5-6 paragraphs written from the point of view of your chosen character. I want to know how you write and how you can imagine new elements. I want to know that you can take a story and make a new one with it.

[Cath]

I'm game. :) Do you want it via private message or on here? Also are you providing a topic or shall we just post part of an intro?
Also, call me Cathy.

[CraftWork]

Awesome, may have gone a little over 5-6 paragraphs. Though depending on you view on paragraphs I could also be not even be close. For future reference, how long should a paragraph be to you?

Also, just call me Craft. It's slightly faster.

[Halvtand]

Awesome, new content!

After reading the character descriptions I think the outcast may suit me the best. I am a bit worried though, about how much interaction this character will get with all the others. Perhaps I'm reading it wrong :)

[Joos]

Cathy - I would prefer it if you posted your applications here. Of course, if you insist, I will read through PMs as well. And you have an idea of what the character is about. So give yourself some convenient starting position and write. Once the IC begins, I will give specific starting positions for everyone

Craft - A paragraph is usually about 30 - 60 words. But more than that, a paragraph is a segment of the scene. It is not the length so much as the content.

Halvtand - Your fears are not unfounded, but if you notice, I have placed her somewhere near the Gor hating miner's apprentice. Also, your IC starting position will be determined by me and I will ensure it so that every character has at least one other character nearby to interact if they choose to.

[Cath]

Oh wait, do you only want a post as our character applications? I'm halfway through a CS :'( So confused.

[Joos]

I don't know why we have confusion here.

In order to be in this roleplay, you need to write a sample post as one of the six characters mentioned. The post you write is your application. It should be about 5-6 paragraphs long (about 30-50 words per paragraph). Do not give me a CS, with Name, Age, Skills and stuff like that. Just write a sample post as the character of your choice and show me how good you are.

[Cath]

I think the reason we have confusion here is that i'm relatively new to the customs of Advanced. It will be done

Thalia Laurent - Hair up & Hair down x2

Here's my entry post. It's one of the recurring dreams Thalia has. Whether it comes true or not is yet to be seen.

The sea wind, like a vengeful ghost, had materialized from the east to tousle hair and bring forth the sounds of creaking timber. Thalia's feet dragged on the red dust that made up the path into her village, it had a name but she could never fully remember it. Her shoulders were heavy; looking to either side she found two sacks of grain balanced on a wooden pole across her back. Green and black flags fluttered in the wind and her lank brown hair pulled at her head as if vying to escape. The opening of the wooden palisade into her village was bustling with more energy than normal.

The people entering were heavily armored knights and their squires; swords and shivs were drawn and pointing inward. Bodies were stumbling from within, instead of sticking to the track they dispersed like water vapour into the countryside. A man Thalia might have recognized raced past at once fast and slow. Thalia caught the expression of fear and dread in his sooty face in horrible slow motion. She tried to speed her pace but the sacks of grain appeared to be weighing her down.

Pushing her way through the throng of slow-moving activity, Thalia was greeted with the sprawling village interior. The smell of fire and smoke filled her nostrils. From somewhere, perhaps it was inside her head, a sirenic chanting started. It could be from those laundry girls there, but their mouths aren’t moving as they worked. Could it be those old war veterans? The harmonious and mournful sound didn’t contain any words, instead pulling heartstrings with the raw emotion contained in their voices. It seemed to sing of home while foreboding some sense of departure.

To her left, a hastily erected bowyer and training yard took up precious grazing land. Rows of children and adults took up the bow and practised their skills, overseen by a squad of soldiers reminiscent of a murder of crows. A particularly talented young girl was offered a place in the army and when she refused, two soldiers picked her up as if she were a ball of snow and took her. More soldiers held back her family as they screamed for her. Thalia wanted to help but before she could turn the throng of mindless bodies surrounded them and her line of sight was blocked.

To her right, the village’s local tavern appeared a beacon of bright lights and hearty sounds. The double doors stood open and Thalia could see inside a whole host of people inside, sat at the crude wooden tables with tankards of ale. A travellingband of musicians were playing a jaunty jig which mingled at odds with the choric lamentations racing around Thalia’s head. As she watched, flannel grain sacks appeared over the heads of four of the village’s most accomplished men and women. Black armored soldiered appeared at either of their shoulders and they were pushed from the tavern.

Four sets of gallows rose from the ground like corpses outside the place. Thalia watched helplessly as the victims were maneouvered into position. She felt the dead weight of the grain slip from her shoulders and Thalia got up and ran. She had one thought in her head. Family. Family. Family. She seemed to be the only person moving at the right speed. The smell of fire and smoke was almost unbearable now. Thalia blinked and her house hoved into view. She slowly dropped to her knees and then onto all fours. Tears fell freely from her dirty face and with her cheek resting on the red dusty track she wept. Before her, the family home was engulfed in an inferno forty feet high. Flames licked from every window.

[Joos]

Cathy - that was beautiful. I loved the descriptions and your writing is very visual. It tells me a lot about Thalia, that dream. And using a dream is a good technique.

I notice, Thalia's biggest fear seems to be the loss of her family. I am assuming that is bigger than seeing the revolt fail for her. That's an interesting angle.

Can I ask you to edit your post just once before I induct you as the first member? See if you can weave in her physical appearance and describe her garb without it sounding forced. You have very clearly showed me Thalia's weakness - her fear of failure, of seeing her family and friends executed. Show me a bit of her strength. And I don't mean skills like fighting or speaking, but things like her resolve, her mettle. Again, see if you can weave it in. Need not be too long. Just a little bit.

However, I am fairly sure you are awesome. And I like the name Thalia.

[Cath]

Awww, thank you! That really means a lot, i wasn't sure whether i had got it quite right as a post.
I'll try, i've got the appearance down pretty good in the CS but i'll see if i can extract that and put it into the post.

Gah, it'd be so much easier with a picture

[Halvtand]

Joos said
Halvtand - Your fears are not unfounded, but if you notice, I have placed her somewhere near the Gor hating miner's apprentice. Also, your IC starting position will be determined by me and I will ensure it so that every character has at least one other character nearby to interact if they choose to.

You had me at "hello".
I'll get that post written then, feels good to know that you thought this through before you posted it. I'll read through the miners apprentice again and hopefully that will give me an idea for personality and stuff. I want the two of them to be not quite compatible, but not really opposites either.