There was a certain topic that arose awhile ago, I shall not mention, and shall not discuss it. Despite the views that I expressed there, it had gotten me thinking. Perhaps I am not the devote sheep I claimed myself to be, happy and content with his little field of withered grass, and his brethren scattered few and far between, only straying over to say hello for but a moment's breath, before vanishing into the sunset itself. Do not get me wrong though, this is not a discussion, nor it is up for discussion on my far. There was just no other proper place to do this, and since this is fairly both on, and off topic of normal guild discussions. I felt this would be an appropriate place, rather, it does not matter anyways.
This is my goodbye.
I have been here a long time. I've be around long enough to witness the Guildfall, and the aftermath of slow death. Even before that, I watched as Spam's elitist trolled themselves into near extinction, pacified slightly by the Ban Hammer. I've watched new members poke around, finding their place, and eventually climbing the long, rusted ladder up into advanced; where there too, elitists formed. I always encouraged those who were willing to try, taught them the ways, how to keep their head down and conceal themselves until being accepted into the prestigious ranks of the best of the best. I have seen the birth of a thousand roleplays, and the death of many more. The point being, I have been around for a time. Under different names, different guises, simply disappearing when I became much to annoyed with the current company I kept, yet to kind, or weak, to say goodbye. Neither matters now.
I have been here to see the Guild prosper, when the members numbered so high a person could start a large group roleplay in a single day, should the winds blow their way. I've seen changes and contests, the art, the writing, and they were beautiful things. Now I no longer have the will to keep up with them. The instability has shaken my faith into a breaking point. I have seen many friends leave, and even more strangers. Yet it is not hard to find them, I know where they go, but I will not mention it here. One of the sturdiest of roleplays, long in it's reign has just crumbled, only to be reformed elsewhere. Perhaps that was my sign that times were changing.
Yet I didn't want to let go. I held onto hope as it shattered and cut down my spirits. I felt that given enough time, things would change. Now all I hear are promises, empty promises. We are but children in the creation of Mahz, and I for one, feel neglected. Not because I am so discontent with how things were, and not because I was one of the many who raised their voices in protest; I was the contrary. Yet, I see promises made, and here we are. Day after day, I ask myself, "Is it going to load?", "Am I going to be able to roleplay today?", "Will my group still be here when I finally get through?". As my roleplay, which I slowly worked up with time and effort, while juggling a load of life's inconveniences, I wonder, if I can, why can't Mahz?
Honestly, this entire thing, to me, boils down to Mahz. Mahz is the root of all problems, and when he is the only answer, you're left with neglect and yearning. Do not get me wrong, I am not here to bad-mouth Mahz, I am simply speculating: If I can juggle my life, Work life, Home life, Family life, Random events and things to deal with, and still be able to put a couple of hours of work into the things I have under taken, why can't he? I have under taken one thing, and it died, unfortunately, but I returned, and I made good on the things I said I was going to do. Now I have another roleplay, just one, for I know my limits. Does he not accept help? Is it pride? Is it sloth? Even those questions remained unanswered, yet here we are. Day after day. Hanging around a tattered old building, with notices for repair, that remain unfilled. Even the most basic of functions, that have been requested since Guildfall, remain unanswered. The instability is a definite game changer for me. Since there seems to be nothing really happening, I've grown quite tired of being a tadpole in this stagnant pool of broken hope.
Goodbye Guild. Thankyou for being the first ever to introduce me into the world of forum based roleplay. Perhaps someday we shall meet again, but for now.
Fare-thee-well. *tips hat*
This is my goodbye.
I have been here a long time. I've be around long enough to witness the Guildfall, and the aftermath of slow death. Even before that, I watched as Spam's elitist trolled themselves into near extinction, pacified slightly by the Ban Hammer. I've watched new members poke around, finding their place, and eventually climbing the long, rusted ladder up into advanced; where there too, elitists formed. I always encouraged those who were willing to try, taught them the ways, how to keep their head down and conceal themselves until being accepted into the prestigious ranks of the best of the best. I have seen the birth of a thousand roleplays, and the death of many more. The point being, I have been around for a time. Under different names, different guises, simply disappearing when I became much to annoyed with the current company I kept, yet to kind, or weak, to say goodbye. Neither matters now.
I have been here to see the Guild prosper, when the members numbered so high a person could start a large group roleplay in a single day, should the winds blow their way. I've seen changes and contests, the art, the writing, and they were beautiful things. Now I no longer have the will to keep up with them. The instability has shaken my faith into a breaking point. I have seen many friends leave, and even more strangers. Yet it is not hard to find them, I know where they go, but I will not mention it here. One of the sturdiest of roleplays, long in it's reign has just crumbled, only to be reformed elsewhere. Perhaps that was my sign that times were changing.
Yet I didn't want to let go. I held onto hope as it shattered and cut down my spirits. I felt that given enough time, things would change. Now all I hear are promises, empty promises. We are but children in the creation of Mahz, and I for one, feel neglected. Not because I am so discontent with how things were, and not because I was one of the many who raised their voices in protest; I was the contrary. Yet, I see promises made, and here we are. Day after day, I ask myself, "Is it going to load?", "Am I going to be able to roleplay today?", "Will my group still be here when I finally get through?". As my roleplay, which I slowly worked up with time and effort, while juggling a load of life's inconveniences, I wonder, if I can, why can't Mahz?
Honestly, this entire thing, to me, boils down to Mahz. Mahz is the root of all problems, and when he is the only answer, you're left with neglect and yearning. Do not get me wrong, I am not here to bad-mouth Mahz, I am simply speculating: If I can juggle my life, Work life, Home life, Family life, Random events and things to deal with, and still be able to put a couple of hours of work into the things I have under taken, why can't he? I have under taken one thing, and it died, unfortunately, but I returned, and I made good on the things I said I was going to do. Now I have another roleplay, just one, for I know my limits. Does he not accept help? Is it pride? Is it sloth? Even those questions remained unanswered, yet here we are. Day after day. Hanging around a tattered old building, with notices for repair, that remain unfilled. Even the most basic of functions, that have been requested since Guildfall, remain unanswered. The instability is a definite game changer for me. Since there seems to be nothing really happening, I've grown quite tired of being a tadpole in this stagnant pool of broken hope.
Goodbye Guild. Thankyou for being the first ever to introduce me into the world of forum based roleplay. Perhaps someday we shall meet again, but for now.
Fare-thee-well. *tips hat*