Their relationship was still a secret. It had started at the very end of the first leg of tour- they’d been staying in the same room thanks to Ryan’s very convincing argument that they should bunk together, and Ryan had decided to go on an impulse shopping spree for his very well-paid stylist, as if people didn’t complain that Brendon was spoiled and given special treatment already. Brendon on that day had just been lounging around the huge hotel room, ordering food with Ryan’s credit card because he knew he could get away with murder if it was up to that man. He’d been incredibly bored as Ryan had some extensive interviews scheduled today and unfortunately Brendon wasn’t required to make him look pretty for those. Not that he wasn’t pretty anyway, all the time.

Anyhow, he stayed in the room and finally hours later Ryan arrived back. The sound of the door opening and Ryan’s familiar voice attracted Brendon’s attention and he had struggled to pull one of Ryan’s hoodies over his head before he headed into the living room, because the less articles of clothing either of them had on, the more likely it was that things would deviate from professional. That said, wearing Ryan’s clothes probably wasn’t very professional either. Oh well- they were friends before Ryan was his boss, and even before that they had a clear mutual attraction that they had been dancing around ever since they met. Sometimes Brendon wished that Ryan had just taken him home and got it all out of their systems before they fell into a working relationship- but then he wanted more than just that.

And more than that was what he got when Ryan showered him in a lavish array of gifts, designer clothes and a surplus of candy and several new video games that he’d managed to find out on his shopping spree. Brendon never would have guessed it but Ryan knew exactly what he liked and conversation about jeans turned into Ryan making comments about certain physical features of Brendon’s, and then they felt comfortable enough to bring up the whole frequently avoided topic of them flirting constantly. It was a perfect lead up into a kiss, soft and sweet and eager and almost relieved, the kind that made him feel like he could fall in love.

And so their relationship began without question or second thought- but, following a conversation about what would undoubtedly be a sour reaction from Ryan’s exhausted crew, exasperated bandmates and jealous fans who would call Brendon a gold digger or something even more tasteless, they decided to keep it wrapped up. Ryan didn’t even tell Spencer. It was nice to have it to themselves, though Brendon could tell that Ryan would much rather be showing him off and talking about him all the time even without prompting. They had a brief amount of time during the break between the first and second leg of tour to fully explore the new type of relationship they had and they became quickly used to being comfortably around eachother all the time, kissing carelessly and without reason or worry, so when they went back on tour and realised they couldn’t do that anymore it was difficult.

But it was exciting, as juvenile and dumb as it sounded. They made out in the brief moments they had alone, colliding together like it was the last time they’d ever kiss or something ridiculous like that, and whenever they were lucky enough to have a hotel they made sure their room was a floor above everyone else’s. The best part about it was that Brendon could tease him and there was nothing Ryan could do about it while everyone else was around. On the softer side of things, it was wonderful to curl up together if they had a hotel room after a show, Brendon talking about how great Ryan was and making fun of how dishevelled he looked after the performance.

It was right before a show this time, just over an hour before the band were due to go on stage, and Brendon was stood behind Ryan who was sat in a chair facing the huge mirror in the dressing room. He was idly playing with his hair, trying to figure out how to style it tonight, as Ryan spoke to Spencer, who had been hanging out near the door for the past twenty minutes. Brendon swore that he knew about them and just wanted to watch them squirm.

Alright, man, let me know how you feel about it. He’d suggested impulsively changing the lineup of songs and Ryan wasn’t entirely convinced, but Brendon could tell he wasn’t really listening anyway as he kept trying to catch his eye in the mirror. Thus, his response was lacklustre. ”Sure, okay, bye.” He sounded impatient. Brendon stifled a grin and moved around to stand in front of him as Spencer left and the door behind him closed. ”Hey, can I put some eyeliner on you tonight? It’d make your eyes stand out more, and I know you won’t let me do eyeshadow, so-“ Ryan was shifting forwards in the seat and Brendon stepped back against the dressing table of the vanity. ”Ryan, not now, I have a lot to do.” He sounded exasperated but he was smiling and Ryan looked so pretty and yearning, struggling to lean forward in his seat and reaching up to curl his fingers around Brendon’s wrist, anchoring him close. Annoying fucker. ”Ryan.” He glanced nervously towards the door.