Blackfridayrule

The Tree of Astra (LadyAnnaLee and Blackfridayrule)

Ah, there it was.

Ridahne had been doing so well, the whole night had been going so well, and with one stupid word she ruined it. Figures. Why she wasn't just waiting for something like that to happen was beyond her--she should have known better. The first thing out of her mouth was a very quick but quiet, "But that's not what--" And then she clamped her mouth shut so hard and so tightly that Hadian would have been proud of her. You'll only make it worse. So she took a breath, sighed, and gave her second, more thoughtful answer.

"I won't do it again. But...think about this...Should not honor come from truth and justice and what is good and right? Not from an artificially given station? Don't let the corrupted actions of one Sol ruin the word. It is our language. Language is history. Language is culture." And then even more softly she added, "I did not mean to offend you. I thought to honor you but...I have never known when to keep my mouth shut." Then bowing, she said, "I will do better."

And that was all she had to say. She quieted and gracefully sat back down in her chair, reaching for a cup of wine. She was not angry, not bristling or bitter or furious. Instead she just looked a little deflated, like whatever emotion or energy that had fueled her up to this point had left her, and she was now just kind of tired and defeated. Maybe even a little sad. So Ridahne sipped her wine and quietly waited for the two of them to be 'released' from the celebration. Ridahne had done this many times before and she was good at it. Perfectly polite, she would sit and be the presence she was required to be, to speak when spoken to, and to wait patiently until the ritual was over. That was her duty. So that's what she did. Instead of paying attention to other conversations she merely inspected her cup, occasionally gave a cursory glance around the room, and thought of bed.

The Tree of Astra (LadyAnnaLee and Blackfridayrule)

really wanted to post but tendinitis is bad and I just started acupuncture so I'm kinda sore. ill post when I can

The Tree of Astra (LadyAnnaLee and Blackfridayrule)

Ooooh, have fun! I wish I could but I'm very far from the beach :( Enjoy mate!

The Tree of Astra (LadyAnnaLee and Blackfridayrule)

Perhaps just disappointed that her efforts didn't go over well. Nothing too crazy.

The Tree of Astra (LadyAnnaLee and Blackfridayrule)

youtube.com/watch?v=uTAaKAVpOOM&list=…

A long-accumulating playlist of stuff I use as inspiration for Ridahne. Enjoy!

The Tree of Astra (LadyAnnaLee and Blackfridayrule)

Ridahne didn't know what to think or feel. She felt a tear or two spill down her cheeks but she wasn't necessarily upset, just...moved. Emotional. Which emotion, she couldn't say. All of them? She decided that whatever it was, it wasn't wholly bad. She decided on just overwhelmed. That seemed to encompass much of tonight, she thought. Somehow Darin coming over to speak with her made her feel even more 'on the spot', which just made her cheeks burn even hotter with embarrassment. She felt so exposed, so open and vulnerable. It scared her. And yet there was freedom in that, too. She didn't want to a make a scene though, and she realized with a quick glance around the room that she had anyway. Inwardly, she cursed herself for not just shaking the feeling off and rolling with it.

Her amber-gold eyes flicked up to Darin, reflecting something like panic and yet something like an apology too. She wanted to speak, to move, to say something or give some sign. But she just had to...just had to breathe for a moment. This day had been earth-shattering for her in one way or another, and her brain was still struggling to keep up and process it all.

Get a grip, Ridahne. You were trained better than this. Pull it together.

One breath. In. Out. Another. Each one slower and longer and more controlled than the last. And then her hand reached up to take Darin's and her grip was strong and purposeful. She stood, smoothed back the loose runaway locks of hair, set her shoulders square and stood tall, composed. It was the best she could do. Ridahne spoke in a low voice so that only Darin would hear, "I am with you, Darin-Sol." Her hand was still wrapped around Darin's; she squeezed it. "To whatever end."

Sol.

The honorific just sort of came out of her mouth without any thought or intention and though she didn't show it on her face, it surprised even her. But she had no intention of taking it back. When she thought about it, it fit. Roughly translated, the suffix meant 'one of high honor', but in Azurei only the Queen or her princesses merited that level of honor even though the word itself did not mean 'Queen'. Ridahne had not belonged to a Sol since her betrayal and had promised herself she would not swear to another ever again. But this felt right. Yes, it felt right. She hoped Darin wouldn't panic like she had when she had first called the girl Ri'atal. Perhaps she'd explain the translation of it later. Either way, it was something for her ears alone for now.

"I'm sorry," she said softly, though at a less private volume. "I'm...not used to...being so...open. You play nicely. Will you play more for me on the road?" She smiled despite herself. "Maybe I could sing for you? I grew up around sailors, and they do love their working songs and shanties..." Another smile. It was awkward and uncertain in its delivery but it was her way of apologizing for all that had gone awry between them thus far, and it was her way of asking, Are we good?. She got the feeling that neither of them would be the same when they left this farm. Now was as good a time for a fresh start as any.

The Tree of Astra (LadyAnnaLee and Blackfridayrule)

Somehow the whole celebration had thawed Ridahne's usually stony, well-guarded heart and she danced readily now that she'd been convinced to get up at all. She knew more dances than she let on. And even if she didn't know the steps or the style, she caught on relatively quickly and had a general feel for rhythm, control, and grace. It was all her sword practice that helped her. In fact, one word in the Azurei language for sparring with a blade was literally translated as 'dance'. She had bodily control aplenty and so using it to move to music instead of with a blade was only a short hop. She was less familiar with the siren and human dances and had to rely on guidance and watching others, but the elvish ones, both Orosi and Eluri, she was quite adept at. But her favorites were the Azurei ones. They were somewhat aggressive in their tambour and a little bit more primal, which suited her. She felt like she could get things 'out' that way.

An Orosi man lifted her by the waist and together they did a quick spin, though as he lowered her into a dip between his knees, Ridahne slipped. She was tired at this point and couldn't keep up with a dance that required that much control. But instead of being embarrassed about it, she broke into peals of honest laughter as she was half on the floor, still clutching the hands of the Orosi man. He laughed too. And it was the first time since she'd been in Darin's company that she'd laughed wholeheartedly like that. It was the first time in months. He helped her up and she bowed to him with her hand across her chest and stepped away, panting.

Ridahne leaned back against a support beam and looked at Darin. She gave another real, genuine laugh as she smoothed back the parts of her hair that had come out of its knot. She didn't say anything, but she didn't have to. For once, things were good. And that was all either of them needed. She called for another round of the lemon-herb drink, kadih, and she and a group of five slapped their cups on the table and threw them back.

The music slowed and softened, and people began to settle in. Ridahne did too, sinking back into her chair. Ravi insisted Darin play, which got Ridahne's attention quickly. Play? Ridahne hadn't realized she played anything. The human protested and even glanced to her as if for help; Ridahne smirked and shook her head slightly. Oh no. You're not getting out of this one. But something about her expression was encouraging. They brought out the fiddle and Darin started to play, slowly and cautiously at first but then the notes seemed to just pour out of her. But then attention was turned on her. And Ravi asked her to sing. He wasn't wrong in his assertion that she could sing--she could, or reasonably well anyway. She was no bard, but good enough for taverns anyway.

Ridahne's eyes went wide. She opened her mouth to refuse, to say no. To say that no, she couldn't, not on the spot like that. Not to a fiddle--she didn't know any songs to a fiddle. She didn't know what to sing, or what fitted the occasion. She couldn't remember any in her panic. Except when she drew breath and pushed it out again, what came out of her was not 'no'. The song just sort of...came. And it followed Darin's song reasonably well, or at least the tone of it if not the exact tune. Softly at first, and then her voice rose and rose until it filled the hall, rivaled only by Darin's rhythmic sawing of the fiddle. She sang in Azurian, so most didn't know what she sang about exactly, but the emotion was there all the same. She sang of grief. Of loss. Of heartbreak. She sang of love, of passion, of fire. Of defiance. Of serenity. And while she sang, Ridahne began to dance much like she had during the first Azurei dance. The stamping of her bare feet on the wood floor was like a drum and the wavering of her hands matched the rise and fall of her voice. And Darin continued to play. The result was something that had not been done before, something new. It was the intersection between Azurei and human. Of stone and the night sky.

Ridahne sang her last note just as Darin's faded off into a soft echo. The silence hung there a moment, for it seemed wrong to disturb it so soon. And Ridahne saw just how many eyes were on her and Darin. She had a sudden expression like she'd just found herself naked in a public square and took several steps back until she had her back against the wall; she slid down and sat on the floor, wanting nothing more than to be less visible than she felt. Her cheeks were bright red even under the cover of her olive skin and tricolored tattoos. What had just happened there was...something sacred. Something pure and unexplainable and could not be replicated or understood. It just was.

The Tree of Astra (LadyAnnaLee and Blackfridayrule)

Also, when you think of the Azurei dance style and the music for this dance, go look up a Maori haka and you've got the heart of it. A little different but that's kind of the vibe I'm going for.

The Tree of Astra (LadyAnnaLee and Blackfridayrule)

Ridahne was surprised by Darin's mood. She realized upon a little reflection that she shouldn't be--this was just like home for her. These were her people. But still, it surprised her all the same when the human gleefully took her hand and all but dragged her into her seat. She couldn't help a tiny, tiny smile. Well, at least one of them didn't feel like a complete outsider. It wasn't anyone's fault either, that was just how Ridahne reacted to large gatherings like this. If they had set them a table with Ravi and maybe two or three others and a modest meal, she might have been perfectly at ease. Here, with this bountiful spread and exuberant cheer and many voices, she was out of her element and it showed.

Again, she defaulted to a kind of forced composure that read more as aloof than nervous, but the closer one got to her, the more they could see her unease. She'd warm up to it eventually, she told herself. But it was just so...overwhelming! It didn't make it bad, though, just...a lot. She grew up on bread, rice, fish, and lean, hunted meats from the desert. Fruits, sweets, and fresh vegetables were foreign delicacies to her as a child. Even as an adult, she couldn't ignore the novelty of them.

Darin thrust a plate at her and was throwing things onto it with a kind of joy that was almost childlike in its purity, in its genuine honesty. She was waving and smiling and looking positively radiant in such an easy way that Ridahne almost felt a touch of gentle jealousy. In comparison, if Ridahne was a dog, her ears would be pinned flat against her lowered head and her tail hanging stiffly between her legs. Not only was the whole affair a lot to process, but it was the first time she had been so...public since her fall from grace. She did not fear the occasional glances of Tax, whom she knew understood her plight. But there were other Azurei, and though they were all acolytes of the Tree and saw her current purpose as far more than she ever was before this, she could feel their curiosity as they looked at her. The mark on her forehead signaled 'treason of a high degree' but it did not specify what she'd done exactly. But word had also reached their ears of events back home. The unprecedented situation of both a Sol and her apprentice being killed, and the remaining Sols having to choose one on short notice, was not small news, and every Azurei in Astra would know about it by now. All of them had the same question in their eyes.

Was it you?

But as she sat there, her plate piled high and her clay mug full of that light, fragrant mead, something deep within her, that flame that made her Isfahan, Fireheart, blazed. She felt suddenly a fierce defiance. You are not an exile. You are Ridahne. You are guardian of the Seed-Bearer. And, staring directly into the eyes of one of the Azurei looking at her, she took a long, very purposeful pull from her mug. Her demeanor seemed to shift from beaten dog to prowling wolf, and she finally began to eat. Really, she was thankful that Darin was putting things on her plate for her. She genuinely didn't know where to start otherwise, and never would have put that much on her plate by herself unless cajoled into it.

The food was incredible. The flavors ranged from sweet, savory, spicy, salty, earthy, from rich to light, from robust to delicate. She had never seen such a diverse spread of cultures in one place. And the mead did a little to put her at ease, too. She welcomed the flavors of home with relish, but was equally curious about the things that she did not recognize. And like the dusty Atakharan-region kid she was at heart, Ridahne ate anything that was put on her plate for as long as things were put there. The only thing she actually took from the table herself was a pitcher of a semi-clear, fragrant beverage that she knew at once. Ridahne took it at once and filled two small cups, one for her and one for Darin, which she pushed into her hand with the same kind of enthusiasm that Darin had shown her a moment ago.

"Here! You have to try this!" She actually smiled. "Don't worry, there's no alcohol. But it is strong in flavor." The drink smelled sharp and acidic, but not in an unpleasant way, and it undoubtedly was made with several different kinds of herbs, the most recognizable of which was lavender, but there was also mint and something else decidedly floral. "Do you have lemons this far north? I have not seen them. This is lemons and herbs brewed with a little honey. Where you are from, you do...this.." she tapped her little wooden cup against hers. "But where I come from, we do this..." She slapped it against the wooden table then drank, and there was a faint echo around the room of the noise as several other Azurei did the same. The flavor was at once sharp and sweet, sour and floral, bright and complex.

Ridahne was in a better mood now, less awkward looking and a bit more at ease. But she was not prepared for Darin taking her hand and practically dragging her off to dance. She smiled but said, "Ai! Wait! I don't know how!" She did not say the she could not dance, for that was untrue. She could. But she had no idea how people danced here and to music like that. Still, she allowed herself to be led away to an open space where people were dancing. And Ridahne Torzinei, fierce warrior, Hand of Death, mystical moonlit forest sprite and slayer of royalty, was blushing. It was harder to tell on her dark, inked skin, but there it was all the same. Still, she was smiling a bit. "I'm too tall for you, Darin! What do I--how..." But she followed Darin's guidance and tried to match what she was doing, and though she was not very poetic about it, she did make it through.

A new song started to play, one with more drums and without fiddles, and Ridahne gave a mock-wicked grin. "My turn," she said deviously, and pulled Darin into a now forming line. Most were Auzurei, but there were plenty of others who knew the dance as well. They did not dance 'together' necessarily, but more in sync with each other, and instead of bouncing and twirling and skipping and dipping like some other dance styles, it was much more controlled, much more sharp and precise. There was some chanting involved, a kind of call and response that resonated deeply through the hall. And the dance style could be called nothing but 'percussive'. Everything was in time with the heavy drum beats--hard footfalls, the chanting, hand movements, and occasional slapping of the arms, which echoed through the hall with a stirring crack. And suddenly Ridahne felt as much at home as Darin had been this whole time.

The Tree of Astra (LadyAnnaLee and Blackfridayrule)

Ridahne could hear the clink of plates and bowls and mugs down below her, along with a soft din of voices. They really were excited, all of them. Ridahne was just glad she wasn't the fixture of all their attention--Darin had that honor. And that burden. She couldn't imagine that they would let her alone tonight, and Ridahne pitied her for that. She guessed they both needed time to think and to ponder. Time to consider their own conversations with Ravi, time to think about what came next. And Ridahne had visions to think of. Her last one had been so clear, so abruptly obvious about what it meant and what she needed to do and this one was so...vague. The first part was clear enough at least. She held on to the image of his hand in hers, the feel of its leathery warmth and the grit of sand between their fingers. Peace. Joy. But inevitably her mind was thrown back to the other part of her vision.

The contrast had been sharp. One moment she was happy and blissful and the next she was...she didn't know what else to call it besides broken, at least physically. She tried hard to think back to the other sensations, other thoughts. It hurt to breathe and her voice, when it came, was raspy and strained. She did not feel the pull of the earth upon her, nor weight on her feet. It felt like she'd been floating. And like something had been accomplished. Yes, like some great struggle was now finished. Finished, and she could let go. Of what? Let go of...

Ridahne sat up and gave a small gasp, looking around as though there was anyone to see her up there on the roof. There wasn't. Ridahne wasn't certain, but she had a feeling that she'd just seen two possible futures. One was her long distant future of peace and happiness. The other, her death. Untimely. Painful. Neither future was certain, but she disliked the idea of even knowing her own death, even in part, before the events played out. To know like she had in the prison cells of Azurei was one thing--the evidence was plain before her and events were already set in motion. For this, she had no context, and was glad she wasn't given more. She shivered. She didn't want to think about that now. For now, she should focus on getting ready for the feast. She needed to look halfway presentable and do her people some pride, at least.

Ridahne slid down the roof and down to the ground, where she found a young human woman and asked after bathing supplies. The woman gladly showed her to a place she could wash and left her to it. Ridahne cleaned up, braided the front of her now combed and washed hair back into a kind of half-ponytail, though a knot was more fitting than ponytail for what it was. The two locks of hair wrapped in blue cloth and tipped with bone beads were prominently in front of her pointed and pierced ears, the silver plates lining the helix polished bright. She put on her traditional garb--a halter-neck half shirt of sorts fringed with small bone beads and woven of tight, sturdy linen. Her knife harness was obvious and she wore the blades in it out of habit, though she left her sword with her saddlebag. She'd be more comfortable with the harness than without it and hoped no one would take offense to her wearing it so openly. She also wore her uri--the sarong-like garment made of a thin, flowing fabric dyed indigo blue that hung about her knees. Though it was sufficiently secure on its own, she also bound it at the waist with a wide band of rust colored silk, fastened with a silver pin in the stylized shape of a seahorse with its head reared. She did not wear shoes. This was her formal attire, good enough for the banquets in the house of the Sols, and good enough for here.

Ridahne emerged as if from the woodwork to find Darin, placing herself gracefully beside her just as the feast was about to begin. Her movements were controlled, elegant, and smooth. Composed. This was the only defense she had against her own discomfort. Ridahne grew up poor and was unused to the idea of banquets and feasts. Though she'd been exposed to them plenty as an Eija, she never could quite figure out how to be at ease at one. How much food was she allowed to take? Was it rude to not try everything? Was she supposed to let someone else eat first before she could start? She struggled with those thoughts even in her own country. Here, she felt lost. Everyone teased her for it back home, mostly in good fun. She found them overwhelming and left her unsure of how to behave, so she defaulted to stone-cold composure. She realized for a moment that Darin was probably thinking the same things she was, and that composure cracked a little to reveal a soft, barely concealed smile. She leaned down close to the human's ear.

"Is this as overwhelming for you as it is for me? I feel like a pig brought from the mud and set in a chair at table..." She was not ungrateful, not in the least. Just nervous.