Earnest Evans Member

Cuban Pete got up. Despite being nearly catatonic mere seconds prior, he had rocketed up to a standing position almost immediately, suffering no ill effects. Cuban Pete stared at Rattlesnake Jack, focusing on his guns. Still maintaining eye contact, he squeaked past Jack and walked to a small linoleum kitchen in the southwest corner of the pod. He cracked open the refrigerator and reached inside. Though the inside of the fridge was completely opaque, Cuban Pete managed to find two bottles of booze. One of the bottles had an unreadable label on it, though its brownish color and festive bottlecap was reminiscent of a cheap, space-themed beer. The other was a much more robust bottle, with *MAGNUM ALE* printed over it in big, friendly letters. Cuban Pete procured a glass from a nearby cupboard and shook the bottles obligingly.

Cuban Pete did not answer, beyond a weak rushing of air. It was at this point that he realized he was struck mute by the battery of mutations he put himself through! Cuban Pete's mouth closed into a deep frown as tears streamed from his eyes. It would be another few seconds before the game mechanics would allow him to move again, but Cuban Pete appeared to be shuddering with grief.

When Cuban Pete was struck by the bullets, he did not appear to react, beyond letting go. Instead, he keeled over and laid still on the floor, punctuated by an almost comical 'squeak' from his gigantic clown shoes. His face didn't contort in pain, anger, or even joy; instead, it maintained the same neutral expression as he left his mouth open, silently screaming. When he landed, the whole pod shook slightly. A small baton-shaped object fell from a rack on the wall, and crackled with electricity. A sharp crackle resounded from the baton, fading into a low hum.

Unleashing a (silent) berserker howl, Cuban Pete leaped up from his sitting position and charged at Rattlesnake Jack. Cuban Pete was momentarily surprised that someone could be slipped and not stay still on the ground for several seconds, but got over his surpise as he charged. With a speed and efficiency alien to the unrobust, Pete wrapped his gloved fingers around Rattlesnake Jack's throat. He switched to an aggressive stance. He tightened his grip around Rattlesnake Jack (now neck!)! Cuban Pete began violently throttling Rattlesnake Jack, shaking Jack's head like a ragdoll as he did so.

Cuban Pete's pod rocked as it landed, knocking him to his feet. When he got up, he heard *something* banging on the roof. Thinking quickly, he emptied out a nearby spray-bottle and squeaked over to the ChemDispenser. The device was rather silly for something that held so many different chemicals, looking more like a soda fountain than a piece of sensitive equipment. He filled the bottle with one third liquid Oxygen, one third liquid Silicon, and one third Hydrogen Monoxide. Swishing it around to dilute the ingredients, the bottle's contents grew thick and foamy. Brandishing his bottle of fresh Space Lube, Cuban Pete was confident that, whatever came through at him, he would be able to slip it. From then, the battle was *his*. With a sly grin, he opened the only entrance to the pod, spritzed a thick, lubey coating on the floor just in front of it, and hid behind the ChemDispenser. If this was a smart creature, it'd take the bait. If it wasn't, he'd just have to wait for the lube to dry before going out and hunting for it, personally.

Another day, another game of Space Station 13. Let's see... plan for the day... Get monkeys, bathe them in radiation to mutate them, check which genetic blocks give which beneficial mutations, and **You are the traitor!** ... Dammit. Alright, plan for the day... get monkeys, mutate monkeys, check their genetic blocks, give myself mutations, find the clown, kill the clown, steal a tank of plasma, and escape on a shuttle alive and outside of custody. Buttsauce. ... ... Well, that's almost all the steps completed. Got Hulk, TK, and Heat Resistance out of it, and the clown killed himself before I got a chance to. At least I got his mask. Alright, now to wait until evac, and **Your objectives have been updated!** Fffffuck! Damn adminbus! Dammit, I'm so angry I think I'm getting fucking tunnel vision! Alright, new plan... *find Clown Planet*. Woah, what's happening? Oh god dammit, what's wrong with my screen?! *find Clown Planet.* Everything's spinning! I can't see a damn thing! *FIND* Oww! My head! I can't feel my legs! *CLOWN* Getting... hard... to... think... *PLANET* **honk honk** Ten minutes later, the station had gone from relatively tame anarchy to a complete wreck. The singularity had been released, killing off the majority of the staff just in time for a mass breakout at the Xenobiology labs. On top of all that, the geneticist disappeared along with the escape pod the engineers were souping up and the clown's body. Cuban Pete paced around the escape pod he had just stolen. He knew nothing about his situation, beyond the fact that he had to find Clown Planet. Where this was, who knew. All Cuban Pete could do was fiddle with the pod until he got somewhere. He tried a few interesting-looking buttons, taking great care not to smash the console with his hulkish strength. As he pressed the buttons, the world seemed to swim away as a loud roaring signaled the starting of the pod's engines. Cuban Pete came to as the ship juddered to a halt. The stars around here were... different. They were much brighter, almost... cartoonish. That, and there was a planet below him instead of an asteroid field. Cuban Pete remembered that he had hardly even explored this ship, and went off to check it out.

So, does that mean Cirno and Utsuho and Pete are accepted, as well?

It's a freeform RP designed around letting you explore fantastic new lands. Why in the hell are you still using the same (rather generic-sounding) person for all these lands? Don't you want to try something new? Don't you want a _fresh start?_

That sounds like a big "if", man. It's probably for the best if you make a new character and bring them up the hard & fun way. Doesn't constantly reusing the same character get stale to you?

You've only excised three people. Why even include Code, Birth, and Anomaly if they're going to be playing absolutely no tangible roles?