Tsukiko Umene, Honeybadger
"Four-hundred ninety-eight... four-hundred ninety-nine..." The black-haired and well-endowed woman, sometimes known as The Honeybadger, was finishing her morning workout. With one final extension of her left arm, she completed her last one-hand pushup.
"Five hundred." Considering she was already on her hands, more or less, Tsukiko leapt off the floor of her apartment in a handspring in order to get back onto her feet rather than the conventional way. Now on her feet, she glanced over at the mirror hanging on her open bedroom door.
Am I getting fat? She approached the mirror, making sure to examine her body thoroughly by twisting and turning.
I don't seem to be, but I feel like I am... and my face... She leaned in to examine her face in the mirror.
No wrinkles... I think... I'm not that old yet. But... wait... A scowl formed as she raised her hand, carefully grabbing a specific hair and plucking it from her head. Holding it in front of herself it was clear to see that it was not a vibrant black but instead a dull grey.
Another grey hair. With a scoff, Tsukiko dropped the hair and let it fall to the ground, where it would eventually be disposed of via vacuum cleaner on some other day.
Now satisfied with her appearance, Tsukiko adjusted her clothes one final time and walked to the kitchen. As she began rummaging through cabinets she could hear a strange sound.
"What the hell?" Turning around she spotted her cellphone sitting on the kitchen table. It had made a loud vibrating sound. Though she was no stranger to owning cellphones, Tsukiko had a bad record of neglecting them and generally not caring about them. So the small device was rarely used. She snatched the phone up and opened the text message, reading the orders from the Hokage.
"Why does it always have to be on short notice? Would've been nice to know yesterday. I could've gotten up sooner. Ugh..." Tossing the phone carelessly back onto the table, Tsukiko gave up on scavenging for food and made her way to the front door.
After closing and locking the door behind herself, Tsukiko turned to walk down the apartment building's hallway. There were three thug-looking teenagers leaning against the wall several meters away, minding their own business. Tsukiko glared at them for a moment before approaching them.
"Shouldn't you assholes be in school or something?" The sound of her voice startled them. These kids clearly knew her, as they all immediately tensed up in fear once they laid eyes on her.
"Probably..." The older woman glared at them a moment longer, creating strong tension in the air. She leaned in close, to look eye-to-eye with the boy that spoke up (who was quite nervous of her proximity).
"If you ain't in school and you ain't trying to fight me... then are you perhaps planning on breaking into my home again?" By now the boy instinctively backed up, accidentally into his friends. All three of them took a few steps away, no longer leaning against the wall.
"What? No no no! We aren't trying to die. We're just hanging around here. Our buddy lives here, we're waiting for him. It's the truth, I swear."Tsukiko glared at the trio again, crossing her arms over her chest.
"You aren't trying to fuck with me? Every time I see you little shits I'm either getting jumped or I come home to find my place has been robbed." Tsukiko reached around to her back and drew her ninjato, The Equalizer, pointing the blade at the boys. All three of them were very shaken now, visibly trembling in fear.
"I think I haven't sent any of you to the hospital in a while. Today may as well be the day..." The three boys turned around and began to run, but before they could get far or Tsukiko could make her move a door opened across the hall. An urban-looking teenage girl opened the door, drawing the attention of all the others in the hallway.
"Matsuri!" the boy called out, almost like he was pleading with the girl.
"Tell this psycho bitch we were just waiting for you!" The girl seemed confused, but after realizing that Tsukiko had her sword drawn and trained on her friends she herself adopted a look of panic.
"Gunta is right! They were just waiting for me! Please, accept our apology for disrupting your day, Honeybadger!" The girl gave a very steep bow, prompting the three boys to do the same. All the while Tsukiko had a bewildered and confused look on her face.
"Oh..." After a moment of contemplation she sheathed her sword on her back. At the sound the teenagers all stood back upright.
"Whatever. If any of my shit is gone I'm cutting the fingers off the whole lot of you." Not waiting to converse with them any longer, Tsukiko shoved past the three boys and made her way to the stairwell. She could hear them start talking, despite how quiet they were trying to be.
"What did you guys do to piss her off this time?" "We didn't do anything. That crazy woman just attacked us for nothing."Have I really grown so irritable that I attacked them over nothing? Tsukiko thought to herself as their voices trailed off on her descent.
I guess they didn't do anything. This time. Doesn't change their history of pissing me off. Little shits deserve everything that comes their way. But that girl. I've been beating those kids up for years and have never seen her before... Little slut's probably new to the neighborhood. Then again... Tsukiko exited the apartment building, stepping out into the street. It appeared the same as it always did. Downtown was a rundown neighborhood, with kids playing in the street more frequently than cars passing by.
Maybe those brats are finally growing up. Maybe they'll stop bothering me. They can just get on with their lives as far as I'm concerned. But how did those kids manage to get a girl? They're stupid, ugly, and have accomplished nothing. I'm the opposite of all those and still haven't held a steady relationship...An angry sneer formed on her face. Tsukiko lashed out, kicking a road sign that displayed the speed limit. The blow bent the pole, tilting the road sign to a slight but noticeable angle.
Whatever. I'm still young, I still have time. Plenty of time... Tsukiko reached to her pants' pocket to grab her phone, but she found there was nothing there. The phone was laying on her kitchen table still.
"Whatever, I don't need to see the time anyways." Oblivious to the strange looks she received, Tsukiko leapt up onto the nearest house, which was next to her own apartment building. In the manner of the ninja, she traversed Konoha by leaping from rooftop to rooftop at high speed.
She arrived very early to the meeting, needless to say. Her punctuality surprised some of the other shinobi, but her disrespectful attitude and lack of attention surprised no one. Despite the many who would show up, Tsukiko didn't pay attention to any of her comrades or subordinates. She only came out of her own thoughts once Zeno began to speak up. And even then a bored and uninterested expression took hold of her face.
Why couldn't this just be printed on a little sheet of paper and mailed to us? That way I could just throw it away and not have to waste my time here... I could be wasting it in way more enjoyable ways. I could watch some soap opera, I could chase down truants, hell I could even watch paint dry. With a sigh, Tsukiko crossed her arms over her chest and drew her attention back to the Hokage.
Whatever. He's the boss.
Shin Maru, Topaz
A loud clang echoed down the alleyway as a garbage can fell over. The man that tripped over it recovered quickly, getting back onto his feet and continuing to run. He clutched the briefcase against his chest tightly as he turned the corner. The alleys between the buildings of the Financial District were tight and often dirty, like this one. However, there were some alleyways that led to dead ends, such as this one. Trapped, the man turned around to change course and run the other way but it was too late.
"Alright, you ran into a corner. Now could you stop making this difficult?" Before him, standing at the intersection of the alleys, was a young man. He was significantly larger than the older man, mainly due to muscle mass. But his youth was apparent. He wore a black coat that was buttoned up, and a Konoha Police Department insignia was etched into the left torso of it.
"Running is just going to tire you out anyways. You're under arrest. Now-"The man charged forward, lashing out by striking the boy with his fist directly across the face. While this seemed to do a good job at stunning him for a moment, the man quickly realized that it wasn't enough. The cop straightened back up quickly, recovered completely from the attack except for the drop of blood trickling from his lips.
"You're making it hard for me to resist beating you," Shin said, reaching out and grabbing the man by his left wrist.
"Let me go! I'm innocent! I was framed! You didn't provide identification!" The man began spouting every excuse in the book, only earning a sigh from Shin. With a twisting motion, Shin managed to get the man to drop the briefcase and pin him to the ground with his arms behind his back.
"Detective Shin Maru of the Konoha Police Department." After slapping chakra-restraining handcuffs on the man's wrists, Shin picked up the briefcase.
The thing was locked, but it felt full. Shaking it garnered next to no sound from inside.
"This has all that fraud money, doesn't it?" Shin asked the man, keeping his foot on the man's back to make sure he stayed on the ground.
"I'm not telling you anything, you fake cop." With a shrug Shin flipped the briefcase upside-down before tossing it against the concrete ground, hard. The lock burst, opening the briefcase and sending paper money flying everywhere.
"Well then. Kinda hoped they were taped together a little better. Now I have to clean this up... Stay on the ground, sir. I'll be taking you away in a moment." As the young detective began to pick up the money, stuffing it in the briefcase by the handful, he felt his phone vibrate in his pocket.
Figuring it wouldn't hurt to check, he withdrew it and opened up the text. The Hokage was calling for a big meeting in all of fifteen minutes.
"Crap, I'm gonna have to hurry this up," Shin said aloud, stowing his phone away again. The pace at which he stored the money quickened considerably.
"Guess I'm also gonna have to do the paperwork on your case after the meeting. Hope nobody gets mad at me for putting it off, but I don't have the time for the reports right now." "Are you talking to yourself?" "No, I was talking to you. But I guess I might as well be talking to myself..." With all the money now stashed haphazardly in the briefcase, Shin forced it closed and withdrew a zip-tie. Once he used that to seal it closed, as it wouldn't stay closed on its own now thanks to his act of breaking the lock, he stood up and helped the handcuffed man to his feet.
"By the way, you weren't hard to track down. Paper trail was easy to follow. Maybe you should try something other than white-collar crime, because this doesn't suit you." "Piss off."Taking off at a run, Shin held onto the man's arm to keep him from being left behind. In fact, he was moving faster than his captive, resulting in the man's feet dangling behind in the air rather than staying on the ground. But this was the fastest way to transport him, without a car or some kind of assistance. The two arrived at the Financial District's police station. Shin dragged the man in, bringing him up to the booking desk.
"Get him on charges of corporate theft and fraud. I'd stick around and file all the reports and evidence and all but I've got a meeting to go to. I promise I'll get the paperwork taken care of in a couple hours, okay?" The woman behind the desk let out a sigh before grumbling a bit as she wrote something down.
"Whatever, kid. Just be sure to actually do the paperwork or we'll have to release him." "No sweat. Oh, and by the way, do you have any plans tonight? Because I'd like to take you out for som-" "Don't you have a meeting or something, detective?" "Oh, that's right. Gotta go see the Hokage. But think about that offer." Shin gave the woman a wink before running out the door, dodging two police who were holding trays of coffee for the whole prefecture.
Shin ran out to the parking lot, withdrawing some keys from his pocket.
Wait, taking the car will take too long. I'll be late like that. Guess I have to go the old-fashioned way. Shin pulled out his phone as he began to run up the police building to get to the roof. Apparently he missed another text, this one from Aoi.
That girl likes sending silly texts. Cute. Too bad she's already in a relationship. I guess the fact it's with another girl makes up for that though, so it evens itself out... Oh yeah, should probably respond.I'm pushing my luck right now, but I'll meet you there.
Putting his phone away, Shin began leaping from rooftop to rooftop. That is, with the smaller buildings. The skyscrapers of the Financial District were much above the altitude he was at, so whenever he reached one of those he had to run along the outside of it until he could reach the next building short enough to jump off of. While this was a fairly quick method of travel, Shin was a bit behind schedule and had to go a decent distance. In the end he arrived over a minute before the deadline, so he wasn't as late as he thought. Landing behind Aoi and Akio, Shin wiped his left arm across his brow.
"Phew, I was almost late," Shin confessed, standing upright and grinning at the girls.
"But alas, I have arrived." Shin made a quick pose, to show off his muscles. This was more out of habit from all his time flirting with girls, as he didn't particularly intend on hitting on either Aoi or Akio. After he finished flexing his arms he stood normal again and put his hands in his coat pockets.
"Is nobody else gonna hang out here?" Shin asked Aoi rather bluntly, before looking around.
He could already spot several people that he knew. He could assume that they had also been invited by Aoi, such as Yamato and Daiki.
As if those two would hang out together. Then he spotted several genin and chuunin, not necessarily classmates of his but shinobi younger than him nonetheless.
They must've taken the kids out of the school too. Eventually he even spotted Tsukiko Umene.
And she looks angrier than usual. I guess I shouldn't try hitting on her today, she might well kill me... With his scan complete, Shin returned his attention back to Aoi and Akio.
"I'm sure others will show up. We're the coolest kids, after all." A confident grin took hold of his face as he brought his arms up and held his hands behind his head casually.
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