Avatar of MonsieurShade
  • Last Seen: 8 yrs ago
  • Joined: 12 yrs ago
  • Posts: 1925 (0.42 / day)
  • VMs: 2
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    1. MonsieurShade 12 yrs ago

Status

Recent Statuses

9 yrs ago
Current Tfw you want to go to the gym and get your stronk on but you've busted your shoulder and need let it rest.
9 yrs ago
Holy fuck. Ok, shit. Insane hiatus. Fuck. I'm still around folks, just been beyond extremely busy. Will try (heavy emphasis on try) to be more active in the coming months.
1 like
10 yrs ago
God forbid I be one of the lucky bastards that doesn't have their wisdom teeth grow in. Nah, just fuck my shit up fam.
1 like
10 yrs ago
As someone who works for a pet store I both love and hate pixar. The next person that tries to ask me if we have "a dory fish" for their goldfish bowl is getting straight up clubbed like a baby seal
9 likes

Bio

I'm just a simple college student working his way through life while simultaneously testing the limits of how much caffeine and alcohol the human body can subsist on before it gives out. Just call me Shade.

Most Recent Posts

Orb weaver landed rather unceremoniously on his butt, and sensing another attack coming, started to roll to the side. He hadn't noticed Casan's landing at first as he'd been so preoccupied with avoiding whatever came next, stifling a yelp as the weapon cut into his arm as it whizzed by. The criminal stood up and dusted off his clothing, grumbling quietly in aggravation, but ultimately none the worst for wear. With numbers stacking against him, Orb weaver contemplated just putting back the jewelry so long as the heroes agreed to do him a favor in the future. Unfortunately he'd never get the chance to as Casan rushed him and struck him in the side with a wing, knocking the wind out of Orb weaver and sending him sprawling into the street. The criminal remained conscious, albeit extremely sore. "I really hate that shape shifter..." He groaned as he slowly got onto his hands and knees, wincing as he felt a sharp pain in his ribs.
Orb weaver hissed in pain at the sudden pressure in his shoulder that resulted from the arm lock, though he was still quick to retort, "Considered that once. I just figured that if i'm gonna be a criminal I should at least be up front about it.". Orb weaver followed this up with three things; the first was a kick to the knee, the second a harder kick to the groin, and finally a headbutt, driving the back of his head hard into Talon's nose. Orb weaver took the opportunity presented by his attack to bend over, dropping his center of gravity and allowing him to rotate his hip in order to toss the hero over his shoulder. "I'm nothing if not a man of integrity." He said as he rotated his shoulder a bit to alleviate the stiffness.
Perhaps it was luck, or maybe fortune really did smile upon Orb weaver, but as he exited the jewelry store, he spotted something shiny moving towards him from above. Reflexively, Orb weaver raised his hand -and by extension his bag- to protect his eyes from the glare has he tried to see it better just in time for the object to strike the spot where his hand had been. Orb weaver remained unharmed, however now there was something embedded in his bag, which in all likelihood might have. The criminal clucked his tongue, not sure if he should've been impressed or annoyed by Talon's entrance. "Oh great, now i've gotta sew up my favorite back pack when I get home. How lovely. You know, if you're going to go about heroing it up, throwing knives around probably isn't the best way to apprehend a criminal if you want to stay popular with the public." Orb weaver deadpanned as he pulled his gun from his coat and leveled it at Talon's chest. "That slightly worrisome method of crime prevention aside, don't you think you should be dealing with more pressing matters? A fire from a gas station explosion potentially endangering lives and you're dealing with petty theft? Priorities man, priorities.", Orb weaver was remarkably calm considering the deadly weapon thrown at him, his voice held a hint of mirth and amusement as he chastised Talon, almost as if it were a game to him rather than a dire situation.
Gotta go to work now folks, i'll be back by about 7:30 if anyone considers interacting with O.W.
Orb weaver watched the chaos going on all around him, feeling not even a hint of pity for the people that were trampled in everyone's mad dashes to escape or exploit the insanity. Watching everything from above had been one thing, but this, being in the thick of it, Orb weaver felt as if he could do just about whatever he pleased and no one would be able to stop him. The criminal looked at a jewelry store and smirked, petty crime was usually below him, but he just couldn't resist, "Hmmm...maybe a quick pit stop before I get my computer. I always wanted a rolex after all." he said with a chortle. Orb weaver strode over to the door and kicked it in, reveling in the shattering of the door's glass as it hit the ground. He walked in, heedless of the clerks hiding behind the counters as he pulled out his gun and used it to smash open a watch case, "Don't mind me folks, just came in to sample a few of your goods. Oh, and for any of you considering hitting a silent alarm, the police have their hands full as is, let's not be inconsiderate here. Heh heh.". Orb weaver snatched up only what caught his eye, coming away with six watches, two necklaces, four bracelets, and a ring, but left the rest of the items in peace. "Thank you all for your co-operation. You folks have yourselves a very nice day.". With his new bounty deposited safely in his bag, Orb weaver exited the store and continued on his way to the electronics shop a few blocks down the road.
The nurse turned momentarily to Ryan with a hint of amusement in her gaze, "Believe it or not, it was actually one of the more well known ones. I used to work for BlackWater. At least back when they had the spine to admit they were mercenaries and not "private security". Bunch of softies they turned out to be in the end.". Dimitri let out another nervous chuckle as he fought his desire to move away from the nurse, however a slight shaking of his arm grabbed his attention before he could cave in to his urge to gain some distance. He looked down at Molly and snorted a bit after hearing what she had to say, "Nice t'meetcha properly, well, as properly as one can given the circumstances. You can call me either Dimitri or Decibel, either's fine. As for a mohawk...", Dimitri trailed off as he peered over the nurse's shoulder at the scar, "I think you could pull if off. Might come off as a bit punk rockish depending on how you do it, but with a name like "Madame Smash" it'd fit.". The nurse ignored the teen's conversations and tied up the end of the suture, giving it a small tug before cutting away some of the excess thread. She then placed a bit of gauze and medical tape over the wound before leaning back with the look of someone satisfied by a job well done, "There you go kid. From what I can tell you were pretty badly dazed but the scar is the worst thing you've got. Just take things slow and don't go tugging at those or you'll end up back in here getting new ones. You can still shower but i'd suggest wearing a shower cap so you don't get your stitches wet, also you may want to avoid sleeping on your back. You can take pain pills as needed, be sure to switch out the bandages with some fresh ones and if you can't, have someone with clean hands help you, come back to me in about ten days and we'll see if they're ready to come out. Oh, and these are for you." she said before handing handing Molly a small cup with two pain pills, an ice pack, and another cup of water. Despite some mounting fear of the woman, Dimitri thanked her for her help to which she responded by shrugging it off and saying it was her job. The nurse stood and lightly bopped the cyborg on the head, "Just don't go head butting people again. You might have a metal skull, but the rest of us don't.", "Actually it's a plastic poly-", Dimitri's jaw snapped shut as the nurse gave him another sharp glare. "It's the lunch period right now, so I don't need to write you brats a pass. Dimitri was it? You think you can handle helping your friend here up and making sure she's alright for the day? I can't exactly watch over her exclusively since I get multiple students in here daily.", "Uh...ok, sure.", Dimitri moved a bit to the side so the nurse could toss out or store the supplies she'd used before offering his hand to Molly, "You heard her, up and at 'em good to walk?".
Dimitri stared with fascination as he watched the nurse do her work. With the speed of an old hand, the nurse had cut and cleaned away a sizable patch of Molly's hair around the wound and hand begun the stitching process, weaving the suture needle in and out of flesh as easily as a seamstress repaired a dress. The cyborg could barely contain his curiosity, "So, if you don't mind me asking, what did you do before becoming a nurse? I don't imagine many school nurses would know how to stitch a wound.". The nurse didn't even look up as she spoke, "I was a combat medic for a private contracting company before this. You name a battle zone and i've probably been there.". Dimitri's mouth hung open a bit, "A combat medic? How in the name of the heavenly buddha did you end up here of all places?", this question prompted a wry smirk from the woman, "Well, let's just say that my employers didn't take to kindly to me using prisoners we captured as training dummies for field work. I would've probably been arrested at some point had I not slipped off the grid." she stated as nonchalantly as a person discussing the weather. If Dimitri's skin could become pale, he'd likely look like a ghost right about now. The school nurse had just admitted to being a mercenary who used human beings as guinea pigs as if it were the most normal thing in the world. The nurse seemed to pick up on his nervousness and chuckled, "What's the matter kid, cat got your tongue?". Dimitri could only laugh nervously, noting silently that the entire time she had not stopped stitching as she spoke.
Jacque sat out on his balcony with a turkey sandwich in hand as he watched the havoc being wrought on the city below. The criminal might not have been willing to admit it, but while he wasn't usually a fan of mindless chaos, it did make for a good show when one could sit on the sidelines and spectate without risk to themselves. The sounds of gunfire could be heard in the distance, likely from people either fighting off the drones or capitalizing on the disorder and mayhem. The gas station down the street seemed to be particularly lively, as evidenced by the smoke clouds that billowed up from that direction. After finishing his sandwich, Jacque stood up and brushed some crumbs from his clothing. "I wonder if someone's got a live stream of what's happening up on the internet. I gotta check it out." Jacque said to himself as he stepped inside, only to freeze and spit out a particularly colorful stream of profanity as the mentioning of the internet reminded him of his destroyed laptop. Jacque scratched the back of his head and sighed, "Guess i'll go out and steal a new one while this crap is going down. Damn I don't wanna deal with this garbage. Ah well, at least I won't have to spend money.". Jacque went into his room and grabbed his bag, mask, a collapsible baton, and his handgun along with two magazines, then exited his flat once more, sparing a passing glance at Remi's cage just as the serpent finished swallowing it's meal. As he rode the elevator down, Jacque slipped his weapons into his coat and put on his mask, donning once more his Orb weaver persona. Once the elevator hit the bottom floor and opened, Orb weaver smirked beneath his mask, "Here's hoping those heroes are too busy to deal with lil' old me.".
Jacque whistled a jaunty tune as he bounded up the stairs of his flat. The building wasn't far from the park, in fact if he wanted to Jacque could simply step out onto his balcony and see what kind of mayhem he'd wrought by riling up the fine citizens of happy harbor. The criminal fumbled for his keys, then cursed as he dropped them. As he stooped to pick up the keys, Jacque heard a series of booming sounds in the distance. It was like thunder and yet decidedly different, especially considering the fact that the clouds above looked normal. His curiosity mounting, Jacque pulled his phone from his back pocket and prepared to check his weather app for signs of an impending storm, but instead ended up clicking his news app as it had a new notification. Jacque read quietly, his nose crinkling as he sneered with distaste, "Robots attacking the city? What is this, national mayhem day!?" he growled. With a sigh, Jacque unlocked the door and stepped inside, wondering as he walked towards the elevator whether or not the robots causing a ruckus actually served a purpose beyond just destroying things. "Y'know, the more I think about it, the more I feel as though crime as a whole is declining in quality. I hope whoever's behind this is at least taking the opportunity to rob someplace important or something." he said as he lifted the little brown box and shook it a bit. After arriving at the elevator, it was just a short trip to the 11th floor and down the hall to the left before Jacque made it to and entered his apartment. "Daddy's home Remi. Dinner time." Jacque all but sang as he strode over to the massive plant filled terrarium that doubled as a television stand. The occupant of this tank was unable to hear Jacque, however the sudden vibrations resulted in a large scaled head to emerge from under a leaf. Jacque grabbed his snake hook from atop the television and stooped down to unlock the cage, scooting a bit to the side in case Remi came out biting. Moving with the sort of speed and fluidity forged from years of practice, Jacque unlocked the cage, opened the rat's box, opened the cage, tossed the rodent in, and closed and relocked the cage just seconds before Remi lunged out in all of his glory. The rat never even got the chance to explore the cage as eight feet of false water cobra bit down on it's face and coiled around it, chewing in venom as it did so. Jacque stood up and dusted his hands off, ignoring the squeals of pain as he walked towards his kitchen. Watching the heroes flail about could wait, for now he wanted a bite to eat.
Have I ever mentioned that I do so enjoy playing antagonistic characters? I wanted to expand on Orb weaver's manipulative nature, and decided to do it in a delightfully dickish way. You lot can expect more of that in the future, and there's a good chance Orb weaver will make Casan a primary target of these antics considering the fact that he'd be easier to single out and he destroyed Orb weaver's laptop.
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