Phoe

Princess-Champions of Hyperborea

She's so startled she forgets to check around her and see if this is an ambush. Alina squeaks, because that's the sound she can make right now. And then she flushes a darling shade of pink, because that's the thing that she can do right now. Her eyes are wide and her face is tense with pure bewilderment and she's looking down at Shazari's head and this has never happened before. She has no language for this. There aren't any cards in her hand for her to play anymore.

And speaking of her hand, she just barely manages to notice that one of hers is sneaking forward on its own to touch Shazari's shoulder. Maybe to pat it? She freezes a mere second before disaster strikes, but now her hand's just sort of awkwardly hovering there, which is at least as bad.

"Please, there's no need for... under your circumstances, I would have thought the same of... you have nothing to..."

Nowhere in Illumina do they teach their princesses to mumble like this. But if they did, no one would be better at it than Alina Cascade is right now. Second after awkward second ticks by and all she's done is make an idiot of herself. But then, as if by magic, she finds her breathing again. And after that, her heart. And then, finally, her words. Her hand drops down that final impossible inch, and she brushes the shoulder of her oldest and fiercest rival.

"For what it's worth, I forgive you. Ninian has tricked a lot of people, and her father even more than her. You were doing your part as the Princess of Jedad, for your land, for your mother, for your people, for your... um, snake, and for your sister. I couldn't ask more from Ourania herself. So just, please, stand up Shazari. This is embarrassing."

There are some who say that Alina's heart grew three sizes that day. All of them live in the Bazaar. That's just the way of things. People talk. Rivalries continue. But for one very tiny moment, perhaps, two princesses understood each other, even though their lives had taught them not to come together like this. Perhaps not to even try. There's a quiet magic in this instant that almost matches the raw power of the Caduceus.

Plus, if she's magnanimous enough for long enough right now, she might be able to skip town again without having to talk about any crown jewels that may or may not be where they're supposed to be right now. One more slip out from this snare, and she's free forever. Or at least until she has to write the letter inviting Shazari to Illumina to discuss reopening trade for the first time in ages. Maybe even... no, she's getting ahead of herself. Free forever. Free forever! She'll be a legend!

Princess-Champions of Hyperborea

Did she just? Did she really just? That's not fair! That's cheating! That's... ooooh, darn it. Alina's good and stuck now. If she consents and walks over she's handing Shazari the upper hand for the rest of this little encounter. If she escapes, even if it's the most graceful and memorable escape in their long history together, she'll still be the loser stuck outside the House of Hospitality in her pajamas that she didn't even pick out herself. To say nothing of the... you know, the other problems with that option. Plus, that's playing right into Shazari's impressions of her! She... long term, Alina, long term. Darn it. Darn it! She's so good, that Shazari! When did she get this good?

...Thinking about it, she probably should not have written that letter the last time she was here. That's why this is happening right now, definitely. If she'd simply not written anything and quietly slipped away into the night, everything would be fine right now.

Well, no. The letter needed to be written. The guilt would have eaten her alive if she hadn't. But she shouldn't have given it to Tashanna! Letting anybody see it was the real mistake. If she'd just written it and burned it, everything would be fine right now.

Well, no. Again. She needed to write it and she needed to give it to someone who was definitely going to hand it to Shazari. What would be the point in writing it just for herself? The real problem was the tone she struck. She probably shouldn't have sounded quite so... triumphant. You know, so taunting. If she'd been more polite and conciliatory, explained that this had been for Jessamine's sake and nothing more, maybe Shazari would have understood. She'd be playing less viciously right now, at least. Right?

But, well. It's just... at the time? Alina really thought that when Shazari finally managed to find her way out of that giant snake, she'd appreciate things feeling normal for a few seconds more than any other thing Alina could give her. That's why Tashii got the long letter telling her how brave and beautiful she was and not to give up on herself just because of what happened with Helya, and Shazari got the one that was pretty much just the princessly equivalent of 'Haha, got your jewels, loser! Come get me!'

She's paying for it now, she thinks bitterly. Nuts. Pear on a lemon cake. The only play she's got left is to try being the bigger princess. Metaphorically. Sh-shut up!

Alina swallows and does her best to at least make sure her shawl is on perfectly straight before anything else. When she walks over, it's at least with the kind of easy grace she's so well known for. If she's got to play a losing hand, if nothing else she'll look amazing doing it. A princess must always be beautiful. She smiles.

"Well, if you're sure," she says mildly. She hopes it's mildly, anyway, "But I insist you come by tonight anyway. It's been so long since we've seen each other, it would be a shame to waste this chance on trifles."

Masks: Resurrection Roundabout

"That's because you're aware of them right now. They're actually significantly lighter than a normal commercial model would be, or even your original natural limbs. But you got switched off for a while and now you're being fed sensory data for the first time after your brain adjusted to a new normal, so now you're... well, yeah. You'll adjust to that part pretty quickly. You're doing great so far."

Errant nods and stands up herself. She cycles through a couple of different postures for a moment. Rigid and military, a casual arms-folded wall lean, hand on one hip and her weight on that side of her, so on and so forth. Adjusting. Trying to find the right energy to match. What type of coach is best to get Cinders through her big montage? Not Mick, that's too yelly and abusive. No one that she's been trained by, either. Hell no. And definitely not the Shogun. Jesus christ. Well, never mind. Plain old Errant would be fine for right now.

Then she glances over at the handrail and winces. This had all the feeling of something she was going to get charged for. How expensive are hospital parts, anyway? Does she still have enough to cover something like that? She shakes her head slowly, and walks to the other side of the room. Her strides are smooth, powerful, and precise. Everything a rookie should aspire to be. She turns around again with a casual, liquid smooth spin that's more a page out of Sabrem's book.

"Ready for your next assignment, Cinders? I want you to walk over here, and take my hand. I just wanna get an idea for what your initial parameters look like. Then if you like, I can see about getting your discharge papers filled out."

Princess-Champions of Hyperborea

"Oh! It's... it's you. Didn't see you there, haha... ha."

Alina winces. This isn't fair! It's not! She brought her gorgeous regalia all the way to Jedad, you know, and somehow that little... rrrgh, the Princess of Jedad manages to catch her in a clashing shawl/pajamas combo! She was only popping out to gather some fresh leaves for tea, you know! The odds of this happening are basically zero!

But it happened! It's happened twice in a row now! Somehow, Shazari's managed to find her while she's in her radiant, most absolutely resplendent best while Alina's... not. The unfairness of it all flashes across her face without her meaning for it too, and she stiffens awkwardly.

Hastily, she smooths out her hair with both hands (sighing when it floofs anyway), tries to rub the sleep from her eyes, checks the corners of her mouth for stray bits of pancake, then draws herself dramatically to her full height. Which is about up to Shazari's shoulders. Her face flushes deeply, but she doesn't look away. Deep breaths, in and out, in and out. She pulls every bit of regal bearing she's ever had inside of her, or at least that she can manage in pajamas, and clears her throat with a dainty 'ahem'.

She doesn't move an inch, but she does smile so politely that both of her mothers probably feel a tingle of pride shoot up their spines at the same time. She follows it up with a perfectly delicate curtsy. From right where she's standing.

"You're right, there's much we should discuss. I was just about to make some fresh tea; would you care to join me? With lemon cakes, naturally."

Princess-Champions of Hyperborea

"I love these so much!"

Alina sets her fork down, beaming like the dawn. She glances briefly around the table and, uh oh, there's Momma making one of those 'I know you mean well, but...' faces, and Jess (who is very clearly in the middle of trying to swallow a bit of appleberry lembanana) is actively trying to get her foot far enough under the table to kick her in the shin. And Euphie is, well... it's tough to get a read on Euphie. Nervous excited frantic desperate hopeful hurt betrayed. If she's anything, she's a wild animal that's gotten too used to being chased off by villagers, and now that her leg's caught in a trap she doesn't know what to do about the person reaching toward her with the upturned hand and the gentle whispers. Alina picks the fork back up and waves it enthusiastically.

"No, I mean it! Of course the pancakes themselves are warm and fluffy and wonderful, that goes without saying, but there's also these little pockets of, mmmm... I'm not sure what? But it's like these little gooey bombs of sweetness and I want to learn to make mine like this someday!"

That's something of a lie, of course. Alina's been around kitchens long enough to know that what she's tasting are little pockets of uncooked batter. There's too much fruit in here, and the excess juices and imbalanced mixing meant they cooked unevenly, and the outside lied to Euphie about how done they really were. But, it turns out? Warm, uncooked pancake batter is delicious. And when it's just in little pockets like this... oh gosh. Maybe this is how they should be made.

"Plus, they're fun! They're so fun, actually. Like a game! I never know what the flavor is going to be until I put it in my mouth! For instance... mmph! Thish? Rhh strrbrrh ish shoooo good! But it's even better when I find a gross one, because now there's strategy! Can you guess which forkful is which? Do you spread it out and hope to end with a good bite? Do you try to find all the penalty bites at once? Are you a coward who covers the entire plate with syrup, Jessamine? I've never had anything like this before."

When she smiles at Eupheria, it's with the same look in her eyes she had when she complimented the Wicked Queen's puppetry. And maybe that's enough to get the wild animal to let the wandering princess get close enough to free her from the trap.

Princess-Champions of Hyperborea

If they were talking about literally anything else, this would be a perfect morning. Alina closes her eyes (they feel so soft now! It's weird! Had she forgotten what they felt like, or were they really different than before?) and takes a dainty sip of sweet and refreshing tea. Her neck knows nothing but the pleasures of this shawl and her nose, which is dainty and refined and not a twitchy pink button thank you very much, breathes in nothing but the smell of pancakes. Her ears are the only things reminding her not to try and slip inside this moment forever.

"Hmmmm." Alina half sighs, half muses.

There's been so much crying, lately. And all of it the very best kind. When she'd steeled her heart and left home again, all she'd meant to do was stop an evil maniac from getting his hands on the staff of creation. She'd hoped she'd be able to learn something about a medicine that might cure her mother, after rescuing Dandy maybe, but never, even if you gave her her life to live twenty times over, would she had guessed she'd find anything this good. It was a lot off her mind. More than she deserved. Seeing Jess in Momma's lap, this time while she's old enough to properly hold onto the memory, is almost too much for her heart to hold. When everything's over... she's going to paint this, she decides. No making that mistake again. She'll paint Momma and Mommy and both of her sisters, all together and with so much love, they'll have to put it in a gallery. It'll be her first real masterpiece.

...No, not like that. She'll need to paint Eupheria, too. And figure out what to do with her in general. Get her away from this place for a while, for starters. Too much pain here. Too many memories. Too much temptation. Maybe keep her busy? Hm, but what court positions would be open? Maybe... she'd talk to Mom about inventing a new one. Royal, uh... Joybringer? The Lady of Smiles? Eh, it's a work in progress. Alina's fingers brush over her shawl and she turns her head just enough to watch her great-grandmother cooking. She can't keep the smile inside of her, or the tiny sigh of relief. She's so lucky. Alina Cascade is the luckiest girl in Hyperborea. She takes another sip of tea.

"Jess is right, he's not scared of me. He probably never will be. And he must be out of moves by now, right? It'd be nice to... rest for a little while. I feel like I haven't slept since Argossa. But... is it really ok? What if he doesn't stay still? I wouldn't sit around waiting for me if I were him."

She purses her lips. And then her stomach growls indelicately. Pancakes. Pancakes are an essential part of any strategy meeting. Does Eupheria make them with chocolate chips?

Masks: Resurrection Roundabout

"Wow. You've really done your homework, huh?"

Errant leans forward in her chair and folds her hands under her chin. And then she's quiet for a long moment, not bothering to keep the frown off her face anymore. She's statue still, hardly seeming to blink or even breathe. Quiet. A moment longer. A moment longer. Just enough for the questioning "Um?" to start up.

She sits up again and sighs.

"I'm sorry. This is new for me too. Talking, I mean. Like this. I... ugh, I'm really sorry. You should have somebody more, y'know, the kind of person you're worried about having to talk to. Normal. Not... me."

She shakes her head, sending her hair tumbling back and forth behind her, and presses the button to fully activate Cinders' new limbs before she's got time to overthink it.

"I'm not trying to dodge your question, ok, I've been sitting here trying to think of... you know, a good movie to connect this to, or, or, you know, a show or something. How would High Queen Ourania explain this? Stuff like that. And honestly, I'm flying blind here because I'm pretty sure those prosthetics they've given you are unique.

I'm... sure they told you already that those belonged to me? Those are the Mk 0.5s, the prototype trainee limbs I got fitted with after a couple of years of outgrowing child civilian designs. It's important that you understand this, ok? Those are not designed to give you your normal life back. And they're not a superhero's cybernetics, either. They were designed specifically to train a potential AEGIS candidate, that is, uh... me, to adapt to life with better-than-human cyberware and to gather data on the pilot's physical and neurological responses to combat and superhuman stimuli."

Blank stare. A deep sigh. Keep going, Errant. Don't give up on the mission halfway through.

"To... to ensure that the full range of response data could be gathered over the trial period, the 0.5s have a special, unalterable subroutine that randomly fluctuates their output in response to commands from... you, you get it, right? For as long as you're wearing those, there will be moments where it's going to feel like you're climbing a mountain or running through water just to get out of bed or walk down the block, and others where you'll try to skip and wind up fifteen feet in the air. On my worst days I had to have somebody else feed me because I would destroy everything I tried to touch, or else I couldn't lift a fork. The only upside is that the custom-fitted limbs they can make with the data these provide can be..."

She does her best to smile now. And to her credit, she probably at least gets close.

"Well, my recorded best at that stage of my training was 27.6 feet for the high jump. 57.9 horizontal, 745 pound bench press. 1,000 pound force on my hardest punch. But... that's enough of that for now. Stand up, if you can, and tell me how everything feels. We can talk more after that."

Princess-Champions of Hyperborea

"Lose me? You're not going to lose me, I'm right here! Don't worry, Kazelia, it's me! I'm in control! I'm the one who's-- nngh!"

Pressure. Pressure pressure pressure! Building up inside her head! It hurts! Oh, Kazelia, it hurts so much! Create! Sculpt, paint over the canvas! There's so much to do, what do you want? What do you want?

Alina is blazing with the light of creation. In her hand lies infinite possibility. All of the hurts of the world are fixable, all the hurts that plague Hyperborea can be wiped away with just one hand. Not with hard work and sacrifice and responsibility, but just one hand! She never has to feel guilty anymore! Nobody's going to look at her and judge silently, ever again! She can fix... everything!

She can make it so Shazari gets a happy life and a prosperous kingdom and never has to deal with the after effects of having needed to descend inside the Snake Husband to save Jedad. She won't have to say she's sorry for failing to get hold of the Heart before it was too late, and happiness would follow.

She can wash clean the incense of Askaia and pluck every bad dream of kidnappings and poisonous shadow arrows out of the heads of the gentle cats who live there, shape new and even greater glass towers to float across the island as a sign of Forever Friendship and pluck Summerveil from out of her memories and put it at the base of Big Hill where it belongs, sparkling and bright and as full of love as it is of ripe strawberry bushes for little girls to hide their practice ribbons in.

She can purge all the rot from Feloria, reweave the great walls of their cities and fill their gardens with more beautiful flowers than even they've seen to beautify their work, make even the harvest crops grow in prettily and perfectly and all by themselves so that the people will have more time for singing and dancing and making beautiful things as their hearts move them! And all of this for free! She could pluck Diana from the sky if she wanted and set her back in the school she loves so much to foster her power and someday be Alina's greatest advisor.

And there'd be time for tea and gossip while she thawed the ice in Mommy's heart! She'd put on the grandest of shows and right at the end show her Momma and get to watch the two of them reunite for the first time since she was smaller than small, and make it so it wouldn't even be awkward that Momma left in the first place. Everyone could forget, and love her, and be loved by her, and each and every one of them could blow and shape the most beautiful glass sculptures to rival even the Heart Tree of Argossa, a place where Alina could watch over the world and keep fixing things if they broke or making them even better as she realized how she might.

Illumina would heal in a day. She'd rebuild Castle Thessia and wash away all of Oberon's horrid corruption from the rooms he'd warped beyond recognition. And without even stopping to rest, she'd fix the towns, move the rivers so they'd flow better, put every house back just the way it was... no! Make them better! Give every person in Illumina their own stately mansion! No! A castle of their own! And there would be music and rain every single day and it would be the most wonderful, magical place that anyone could ever dream of! So wonderful the whole world would want to move there!

And it would... and it would... and it would!

"...J-Jess?" Alina's wide smile falters. Her wings shiver through with sudden strain, "What are you? I-I mean, how did you get here? Why are-- make me? But I..."

It's such an easy thing, you know. Make her happy. All she wants is for Alina to look at herself, just look at herself, just look at herself! The Caduceus throbs in her hand. The waters on the floor draw together and rise up in an inverted waterfall that sprays its gift back down to everyone all over again. But where the stream rushes strongest, just next to Alina, the water runs smooth and crystal clear: a more perfect mirror than any you could make by hand if you had a thousand years to learn the craft. And she looks. Just to make Jessamine happy, Alina looks at her perfect body.

Why is she crying? Her face is so beautiful. Her lights are so dazzling. Her arms and legs are so powerful. Her body is shaped as if from water itself. Everything is perfect. Better than perfect. And she's... and she's... not... Alina. Not Alina anymore.

Well, she can fix that! She just has to make herself more Alina! She can keep the fixes and the power and the everything, she just has to draw out more Alina-ness to show overtop so that everybody will stop worrying. S-so... that's all she... yeah. She'll just. Yes. She'll focus on her most essential self, and that will fix everything before she fixes everything else.

In the waterfall mirror, another form materializes next to the radiant and perfect Story Queen Alina. And it's not her most essential self either, but the shape of her as a young Princess-Promised again. Just a kid. The one who turned up in that reflecting pool all those lifetimes ago when she had a terrible choice to make about what lights could shine where. The young Alina looks at her grown up self and shakes her head sadly.

"Poor Eupheria," she says wistfully, "She had to hold that awful thing for so long. Waaaaaaay longer than you, Lina. How many Euphies do you think she had time to make to cover over herself before you showed up?"

"But! But I!"

"You know what I think? I think she needs a hug. You and her both. Can your stick give hugs?"

The waterfall loses shape. It breaks apart, and everywhere fresh water surges up to people's knees. Alina's wings sparkle brilliantly as she softly drops down from the air. She's still clutching Rita tightly, and she's still clutching the Caduceus even tighter. There's a strain on her face that looks almost like it's hurting her as she looks into the eyes of the only two people in the room who have been brave enough to ask her to be less than More.

She shivers.

"I don't, I don't want to be weak. I don't want to be cold. I don't want to go back. I don't want to be the short one, the useless one, the one who ruined everything! I... I don't want to feel broken anymore! Can't you... don't you want me to... I, nngh!"

Her wet hair and her crown are weighing down her neck. Alina bows her head, and sniffled while nobody can see her face. Her impossibly perfect legs are shaking as she clutches her shining fingers tightly around the staff.

"I... I can't! Please, I," she looks up again and half reaches out her hand before drawing it back again in haste, "Help me! I don't know what to do! Help me!"

Masks: Resurrection Roundabout

"Don't worry Cinder, you're doing fine. Just relax, ok?"

Holy shit this is a disaster. This is a disaster wrapped in a catastrophe. Bake at 375 degrees for 15 minutes, arrive at hospital room. Jesus Christ, what is she doing? This poor kid! Corporate espionage steals her arms and legs and then she goes and gets grafted to the Fuck You Test Limbs without anybody explaining that to her and THEN they go and saddle her with this third rate knockoff mentor figure to

Rrrrrrgh!

No. She's getting ahead of herself. Euna isn't anybody's warden or teacher or, or... whatever the hell else. Not just yet. But still, jesus. Fuck. There's so much to say, so many horrifying implications to work through and she's been talking to this girl for... how long now? And she hasn't even managed to break the ice! Guh. Should've sent Sasha. Should've sent the Commander, like they did for her. Should've... just... anything else. Anybody else!

Euna takes a deep breath that she hopes is at least stealthy. Ok, ok, easier questions, easier questions... come on, Errant, you're doing this for her. Do it for that look she had on her face when you walked in the door. Her arm half twitches toward the bed, but she stops herself. Right now, there's nowhere she can touch Cinder that would have any meaning. Any value.

She fights to keep the frown off her face.

"Ok, how about, uh... actually, you know what? Let's forget about my questions for now. Is there anything you want to talk about? Anything you want to ask?"

That's too soon, you idiot! That's much too soon. Errant cracks her neck, and braces herself for what comes next.

Princess-Champions of Hyperborea

This is... amazing! Like swimming through the deepest lake, but you can still breathe! Like sunbathing after a shower but you don't have to get out to do it! Like... like dreaming. It's like dreaming, but you're still awake enough to enjoy it. Alina gasps with wonder.

She's so happy she's floating! She stretches one crystalline hand out in front of her, wiggles her fingers. Beautiful. Gorgeous. Beyond compare to anything but a single memory. A dream. A memory of a dream, or, or a dream of a memory. Hers now. Forever hers. Alina is beautiful and flawless. Her silks and her hair flutter gracefully in a breeze that's just for her. On her crown, her new lights glitter and she lights up in all new colors. A pair of great, shimmering diamond wings sprouts from her back and unfurl themselves with Queenly poise. Where her lights shine through the feathers, the ground is bathed in wondrous pools of color.

On the ground, the emeralds she'd seen the world through sparkle brilliantly, full of pride. Full of softness. Full of relief. They rise before Alina, and when she clutches her shining hand around them there's a feeling of raw heat, and then she's holding a single perfect gem which floats up to her ever expanding crown and flits happily between old friends and new. Green is healed at last.

"Look at me!" she says with breathless, giddy laughter, "Everyone, look at me! Can you believe this? I feel so good! I can do... so much!"

She twirls in the air with a massive flutter of her diamond wings. Underneath her, all her friends and family are covered by a kaleidoscope. So strong! So fierce! Faster than fast! More graceful than grace itself! So, so warm! So warm! Alina feels her scar melting into nothing, lifting her higher and higher, further and further into bliss!

"Keep singing, Kazelia! Please, your voice is so beautiful. I want to hear the songs of your journey, now that ours is finished. And after that, I'll... oh! I'll help you see the stars again! Won't that be great? And Adila! Let's give you a voice that you can speak with, safely, and extra hands for holding things, and oh! My stars! There's so, so much that we can do now!"

Alina gestures with her free hand and, as her fingers curl delicately into a fist, she lifts Rita up into the air with her on a column of ochre light. Her heart beats lighter than it ever has in her entire life, and she dips her neck down to kiss her perfect girlfriend, hardly noticing the way that Rita's looking at her even as she melts against her lips. She pulls away and looks surprised to see Rita shivering, eyeing something or someone on the ground and looking more uncomfortable than in love. Her little hands keep twitching, like she's thinking of doing something awful and then second guessing herself. Alina's wing bends so that she can scratch Rita on the special spot behind her left ear that always calms her nerves with the tip of one radiant feather.

Her mind is already drifting out and away, across Hyperborea. Thinking of all the little hurts, and then all of the bigger hurts she's seen or heard about since all of this began. Plans are forming in her head, the rivers she'll move, the oases she'll build in the deserts and the hills she'll shape and the houses she'll rebuild and the towns she'll make grander, and everyone, everyone will love her and forgive her and never say she's a screw up who doomed Hyperborea again! They wouldn't... wouldn't dare. Would they?

"...Kazelia?" Her smile strains her lips. Her eyes are so soft they look liquid, "Why aren't you singing?"