Prince

Naruto: Birth of a Better Generation

I do so as well. Our goal should be to salvage two active teams.

Naruto: Birth of a Better Generation [Characters]

After making all final editions to your CS, post it in the actual CS list as a reply for me to link.

Naruto: Birth of a Better Generation

You realize your sensei is legit picking up his students, right?

Naruto: Birth of a Better Generation

Tink. Tink. Tink.

"I see hows youse stop, girl. I see hows youse reject my words. But teh words I speak are teh truth. There were men before Sai far worse. A war before Sai far worse, an' ignorant little runts like chu ten' to forget about it. Teh Second Great Shinobi War..." he told her as he chuckled. Reality was, there was no history class about this war. Almost no one spoke of it. It was the war that led up to the regime of Sai, but no one had ever really explained it, especially to the younger crowd. Bits and pieces of wars from the past were lost, especially that of the First Great Shinobi War and the villages before Sai. The world was purged of itself, and men like Hayato held the last keys to it.

"I seen Sai 'imself. Hitori-san and Sai spoke on teh last battlefiel'. Do youse know why Hitori was hailed a hero? Not 'cause he ended Sai, but 'cause he tried not to. Sai was left drained. All dose wicked beasts taken from him, his clones cut up - his hearts pierced, an' he still fought. He fought with passion dat even if was wron', mon cheri, was dah most admirable t'ing a man can have. Hitori, seein' dat spark in him - that humanity - offered teh let'm go if he had himself sealed. Hitori would've let Sai live to see his dream come true in dis generation," Hitori told the girl as he had his hand raised, allowing a muted, yet still powerful-in-appearance ball of swirling wind appear before her using his Spherical variant. "Sai was gonna kill'm all.He had teh same idea, ya see. He wanted a worl' with no soldiers. No wars. He saw teh only way fo dat to be to kill'm all, including 'imself. Hitori den used teh Reaper Death Seal to save us all, girl,"

Hayato shook his head, assuming his speech would fall on deaf hears he would then have to make bloody, yet still made the attempt. "Youse don' think a man like Sai took o'er teh worl' alone, tho, didja? Sai wasn't nothin' for worl' domination. Truth is, an' everyone dat ain't a runt like you knows, dat Sai had his empire given to'm. He had a sensei dat was a tactical genius, an' alongside his son, brother and best frien' took over Iwagakure. Dey held a coup durin' teh Second Great Shinobi War, and den used dat country as a base to take teh others. Not shit I guess you knew, but lemme tell ya, it was a war dat didn't need fought. Do you know what spurred it? Teh arrogance of Konoha. No one knows what specifically started teh war, but it came from dese here - our lil home. First was teh Land of Lightnin', den Water, and seein' teh opportunity the Lan' of Earth came in. Dat war was fought o'er selfish pride; I was trained to fight'n'die in it. My home was Ame, girl. I fought a few battles, but when the coup in Iwa ended up branchin' to Kumo and started war with Kiri, we fled. We fled 'cause didn' stan' a chance. Ame was left to die by Konoha, and its only salvation was teh shinobi dat took over teh worl' once called it home."

Dozens of the little metallic balls floated around Kami, defying gravity as if that was an accomplishment. In truth, Hayato was just waiting to use them, even though he didn't really wish to. "You t'ink I'm some barbarian girl, but you don' know. You don' know how the foolish, arrogant pride of a few can cause the deaths of so many. You don' know not understandin' one's place can result in so much death. You don't see how teh Resistance everyone idolizes wasn't e'en the only one. T'ere were dozens of'm all across teh lands. It was with dere combined efforts dey beat Sai, not just a few. Dat is what Hitori and Hosuka understan', and dat is why we get so much lenience. We were part of teh same cause, but don't chu for a moment think tere weren't others like-minded dat would've done far more harm dan good. Theyz still aroun', too. Youse know what happened to Division B, an' dats why I was made a sensei. I won' letch punks get churselves killed. En' a story."

Naruto: Birth of a Better Generation

Tink. Tink. Tink.

The bells were ringing. Hayato had released the small, metallic balls into the air and allowed them to float there on chakra threads. He only needed a few, and he let their light chirp echo only thrice before he moved. As if bending the air around him, his body seemed to glow like a mirage. It was his White Jacket Insanity. Faster than her chuunin eyes could process and fast enough to give the Legend himself Kirugetsu a challenge, Hayato grabbed at the girl's throat and slammed her into the wall behind them - making any agility she might have with taijutsu absolutely moot. It was no jutsu he used before, simply scare tactics he learned in the deserts of Sunagakure, but it had now developed into far more.

"In my hands,mon cheri, are three metal pipes. With dem, I shoot jutsu dat can topple buildings. Try an' move now, an' you won't have a head," Hayato warned her. He was not playing. Not anymore. True, Hayato was not one to abide by the normal social convenes of Konohagakure - or anywhere for that fact - but blatant disrespect to him was not something he would allow. At least, not from someone under him. Damn the consequences as well; he never did care for reprimand, and the Hokage himself hated to even attempt such with Hayato... mostly for the same reason Kirugetsu hated even talking to the man. "I will do what I wan', an' no man here - not even Hosuka-san himself - will stop me. Not without'a catchin' first, an' even if'e does, I don' fear death. I cain't," he told her. He spoke words that within the village sounded like blasphemy. Speaking out against the Hokage, Hosuka, was insanity. Hitori, his brother, sacrificed his life to use the Reaper Death Seal on Sai himself - an act of valor that made every single man in the world respect Hitori and thus his brother. Almost everyone one, at least.

"I hunt men dat even Hosuka fears. In teh war, Sai had dese guards, you see. Teh last shinobi he evah trained. Dey had seals of unholy power, girl. Dey did grotesque t'ings to teh body. Dey could use teh power of teh Uchiha... teh Hyuuga... teh Senju... an' so many more. Any clan you can t'ink of girl. Sai had'm all, and made'm into beasts of men. Soldiers at'is will. Dey killed more people den Sai himself an' from what I take enjoyed it far more..." There was a look in his eyes. Of horror. Not of fear. But of a disgusting horror. Some of those with Sage Seals were abominations. Experiments gone awry, men after power or sometimes men so twisted they were beasts to begin with. The Sage Seals were not just a threat because of their threat of Sai, but because of their instability and raw power. Any one of them could have the power of a Kage, although few did. To encounter one was suicide.

"I read yer profile, girl. You may've seen twisted bodies, but chu ain't seen teh twisted minds. You ain't seen how dat nature chakra ain't really natural at all. How it affects dose who cain't handle it, girl. I've seen dem stop othah hunters like me by grabbin' children. I've seen some dat acted like your brother, an' made you feel a world a' guilt for what chu had to do. But what dey all had in common girl was powah... no remorse... no guilt. No humanity left in'm, for teh most part. Dat's what I'm used to, girl. Dat's what I fight. What I see. Even among shinobi, teh t'ings I see - not just broken bodies, girl - are horrific. But chu know what?" he asked her, as if she could answer him with him holding her throat as tightly as he did. He then loosened up and tossed her on the ground. It was made plain: his question was rhetorical.

"I always come back wit'a smile on mah face, actin' like it don't bothah me a bit. I seen my best friends die, girl. I watched my home burn. I hid in deserts for years... not one've you lil kids got shit on dat. If you t'ink you deserve what I got - where I am - and teh treatment I get... then you t'ink of everyt'ing you love - these people in dis building, helpin' dem, healin' teh sick, savin' the hurt... burnt to the groun' 'cause've of a war dat never needed fought. Gone. Den, when you felt teh loneliest in teh world, you had to hide in a place dat might'a been Hell on Earth just teh live. You a medic nin, girl. You do nothin' but save lives. Imagine not wantin' yer own. Den, den at t'at moment, you might get a sliver of respec' from me. Until den, you on my team, you my subordinate an you gone listen to what I say. If you don' like how I ac', I don't give a damn. But, mon cheri, I'mma tell ya, I really don' wanna have to beat respec' into ya...

...but I will if I have'ta."

Naruto: Birth of a Better Generation [Characters]

I really don't like the idea of him killing his own teammates. Wasn't the idea I was going for. Division B got wiped out in a way I'll explain later. The natural immunity to some poisons is fine, but I really do believe that literally killing your teammates is a wee bit far to ultimately be replaced onto teams. It wasn't a 'training accident', either. Regardless, it should also be noted that I don't believe this character is as much of a "gifted problem child" as he simply is just a well-trained kid with some good abilities. There are others whom have been described similarly, so he's not a prodigy, especially not at fourteen. He is, however, a step above the norm, but again I will credit that due to his training and age. He's, if anything, proficient.

Naruto: Birth of a Better Generation

Hayato slammed his hand into the wall in front of Kami, swiftly passing her face with enough for to have slammed her entire head into the wall and likely cracked her skull had he wished. "Mon cheri, I told youse I was a real impatien' man..." he told her before planting a scroll into her chest with his free hand. Pressed into her bosom with literally nothing but his finger, the jounin grinned deviously. It was not lined with his normal sexual overtones, either - it was a type of malice. What was to come next would undoubtedly irate the young medic-nin.

Hayato withdrew his arm and stepped back, crossing his arms in the same motion and glaring at the girl with a glint of his own superiority. "In that letter, little girl, you'll see I've 'ad youse taken out of all of dese nice little clinics in Konoha. You won' be returnin' here for a whole thirty-days, an' dats only if I wan' chu to. You see, youse right; dis place 'as rules, an' one of dem is you listen an' respect your superior officers." Hayato then burst forward with speed, overlooking Kami with a new daunting body. It was no Killing Intent like his counterpart Kirugetsu had mastered, but it was easily an intimidating feature. For a moment, Hayato even spoke with a significantly lesser accent: "Do you know what I do? I hunt the deadliest nin left: the Sage Seals. Theyz the only men in dah world that can bring back Sai, an' deyz some of the teh most powerful. You will die if you don' listen tah me. You will die with jus' one wrong move, lil' girl. You won't be savin' a damned person if youse dead, an' it's my job to make sure ya don't. You got promoted to the field, girl, an' it's a helluva lot diff'rent than these cushy clinics."

Hayato stepped off from the girl and turned around to walk off. He wasn't going to let her step in. He wasn't going to entertain the notion that she deserved to reply. He was her sensei. He was her superior officer, and even if he wasn't known for it, ignoring his orders and making him wait only gave him time to go through the proper channels and have her place at these hospitals dissolved. As Hayato walked off, he radiated his rage, his superiority and his dominance. He was not going to allow her to do was the other genin did, even if she wasn't a genin. He never wanted this job. He never wanted to be a sensei. He was a killer. A hunter. A loner. He was a nomad, and there was no room for others in his lifestyle.

"Rule number one of the Allure, mon cheri: you will be treated as you treat me. You wan' a nice, productive sensei? Youse best be changin' dat nasty attitude."

Naruto: Birth of a Better Generation [Characters]

The character is easily acceptable, and I'd put him in the top five. Meaning give him a Registration Number lower than 000006.

Secondly, this is more of a request and suggestion:

If he was to be anywhere near the front lines of the final confrontation in Amegakure, the fact he is alive most likely means he is only alive due to a) Sai overlooking killing him B) not seeing a lot of action or C) getting hurt during the battle, but surviving a midst piles of the dead. Genin like him were used as simple fodder, and that's something I feel could fit quite well into the character.If he's egotistical, let him have linings or ingrained memories of being surrounded by people of similar skill who were slaughtered. The act of a false-sense of self-esteem beside an ego such as his are normally complimentary attributes that work well to give a character depth, and some badass battle-scars. Chances are, he's nearly-chuunin level.

Naruto: Birth of a Better Generation

"Learn quick, mon cheri, teh ruwels are not somet'ing I follow well..."

Hayato then snapped his fingers, emitting a high-pitch shriek that echoed within and only within the room. The half-dead genin both simultaneously shouted out and covered their ears; the torture itself was confined to the room by Hayato. More important, however, was the nigh-ear-bleeding focus of the sonic assault onto Kami. "Is not wise tah speak tah yer sensei like dat. I am yer sensei. Now, I dun," he began explaining to her before snapping his fingers again, letting out another torturous ring, "care if you call me Hayato-sensei, Nakamura-sensei or e'en Allure-sensei, but youse best call me sensei. I watched Kiru-san an' his lil runts. I won' be lettin' youse treat me like dem. I'll kell ya first.

With that, the sonic vibrations ended and both genin were cringing in the fetal position, regardless of their bruises and injuries, even causing some cuts to open up and bleed. Although there was a calm to the storm, Hayato drummed his fingers along the door frame beside the room, each thump as loud as a hammer. He stood beside the door frame for a second before saying, "Get dese kids stitched up 'n sent 'ome, den you'll be meetin' me in teh lobby. You, mon cheri, shall be helpin' me find teh others on dis team, and I'll be given ya all introductions soon. Don't be too long, tho - I'm a real impatient man. were the final words of Hayato before he exited the room, silently marching down the halls.

As Hayato walked down the halls, he only reflected back on how he saw Kirugetsu and his genin being treated. As aloof as Hayato was to Kirugetsu, he was stern in the sense that these kids would be under his supervision. He had little idea what the jounin office was to send them on, but if he was going to bark orders at them, they needed to listen. Chuunin or not. Hayato hunted the Sage Seals - he knew of ruthless power, and he saw the unforgiving nature of combat. These kids, if they were to act like those of Kirugetsu's, would die in a half-a-heartbeat in any of the combat Hayato was used to. Division B was already wiped out. As self-centered as Hayato was at times, he couldn't let Konoha take another hit like that.

Naruto: Birth of a Better Generation

"A'ways was'a sore loser..."

Hayato lamented as he watched Kirugetsu and his two genin walk out from the hospital. It took very little effort to discern the reality that Kirugetsu had no intention on doing as Hosuka requested, however, he doubted the old vet would be reprimanded given Hayato literally egged him into combat. If anything, he knew he'd be reprimanded if the Hokage was even capable of such. Hayato only chuckled to himself at the idea of anyone reprimanding him for anything. Such a thought was... well, it just wasn't a reality in the world of the Allure.

"Yes, sir?' asked a nurse whom thought Hayato was attempting to get her attention as she chuckled. Hayato had been reading the profiles of his soon-to-be squad before taking notice of Kirugetsu, and found this to be a prime opportunity. Kami Rinha, a chuunin of his squad was a medic-nin, and he was at a hospital for shinobi. Finding her might not be nearly as difficult as expected. "Yes, mademoiselle, I do think you can. How lovely of you to ask; don't see such a lovely face with such a fair heart often neymore..." Hayato replied to the nurse as he moved forward slightly, letting his soft, yet dominate features take over while his sly grin steered the new direction.

It took very little effort to discern the location of Kami from that point on. He was relocated to the front desk where all he had to do was state his name and purpose to find her, and he'd be sent to her current assignment. His suave efforts were pointless considering the nurse would've told him anyway, but it nonetheless was a common trait of Hayato to attempt to use his rhetoric to acquire what he wanted. Hayato darted through the halls to find Kami, whom was simply healing some genins that returned from a mission. Simple enough, genins getting hurt on their first missions and Kami - as a chuunin - needed practice. Made sense. Considering Division B was just dissolved, she was most likely put on clinic duty as a form of standby until this moment, when her new sensei would show up.

"Ah, a medic-nin at such a young age. Rare, truly. Congratulations, miss," Hayato told her as he strutted into the room, ignoring the general rules of courtesy as there were still two genin in the room, one who needed treatment, even if minor. "Name's Hayato Nakamura, but... most known me as teh Allure of Ame, mon cheri. 'Ohkage 'emself assigned me to ya, miss Rinha."