Avatar of Sombrero
  • Last Seen: 9 yrs ago
  • Joined: 11 yrs ago
  • Posts: 547 (0.14 / day)
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    1. Sombrero 11 yrs ago

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Recent Statuses

10 yrs ago
Dammit, smell! Why do you always lie about the taste of things!? Bread is never as good as you say it is! And vanilla extract tastes like petrified ass! PETRIFIED ASS!
3 likes
10 yrs ago
Using a phone on RPG. PROS: You can zoom in! CONS: fucking everything else!
11 likes
10 yrs ago
Glorious Math Teacher: "You know protractors, right? The rules we have for protractors are simple: Freshmen use these, don't put them in your mouth."
6 likes
11 yrs ago
Punching out Nazis and wrestling a yeti, sitting at home with some festive Spaghetti, rigging my boots up with high-power springs... These are a few of my favorite things!
9 likes
11 yrs ago
Still trying to figure out whether the Crusades qualify as actual wars, or a steaming hot mess of clusterfarkery best accompanied by the Benny Hill theme...
3 likes

Bio

I'm here, and I'm stuck in the middle with you.

Most Recent Posts

Meanwhile, in Dom's subconscious:
Gah, it's a trap! I knew it!
Hurry! Make a roll for bluff!
Is there a disadvantage for improvisation?
Of course there is! What do you think I am, some kind of genius?
Well, I'd hope so... *clackety clack* Is that a 2 or a 5?...
It's a 1. Critical failure.
Your handwriting is terrible.
It's dark in here, okay!?
Domonic raised a single eyebrow at the scene in front of him. There were men. Men with guns. And Cesare obviously had good taste in henchmen. Where'd he even find that giant. His hands fell to his pockets, fingers clenched around the two knives he brought with him. He struggled to try on another accent. B-movie German wasn't the most convincing, but it hid the voice of Ibor well enough. If the trap was already set, he would have to convince them they had the wrong guy.

"A-are you men Vivaio und Sons? I vas comingk to see if I could set up appointment sometime. My mozzer is in Hospice."
It hadn't been very long since the morning Domonic found the new pressure cooker he put in his apartment had something in it. He had exhausted his last three in his numerous attempts to stop Stand-Up Guy from foiling his plans. They worked as well as he could have hoped, except for the part where he was put behind bars. Or rather, in a little grey room with abhorrently saccharine employees breathing down his neck and only allowing him to use plastic spoons and glue sticks for everything. That was well enough, he supposed. He could still kill someone with either of those things, if he really wanted it hard enough... He didn't even need to explode two of the pressure cookers. They were deterrent enough, and it bought Domonic just enough time.

The problem was, it was an expensive household appliance, and once you make a pressure cooker into a bomb, it's never going to be a pressure cooker again. So he had to buy a new one every time. This time, he resolved to use other methods. His pressure cooker would be used for pressure cookery only from this point on. But now something else was in it.

It exuded an air of expensiveness, and as he opened it, he noted (almost aloud) that it smelled, frankly, like shit.

Inside, there was a formal-looking invitation, an address, and money enough for ten more pressure cookers. What was this? Some kind of taunt? Some demonstration by a stuffy eccentric that wanted to demonstrate some illusion of omnipresence? Did they think he was stupid enough to fall into that kind of trap!?... He cursed the note in Russian spitefully. But there was something about it that was definitely off. Who would put this kind of effort into inviting him into a trap unless they were as insane and economically detached as Domonic made himself out to be? Obviously, this Cesare character was loaded. Dangerous, but loaded...

Perhaps Big Game would pay him a visit and show him who was the dangerous, loaded man in this country... After casing whatever fancy joint this shady character invited him to, of course. Maybe he could squeeze something valuable out of him before the job was done... He also really, really needed a lead in crime elsewhere. Ohio wasn't exactly a happening place, and maybe he'd run into the golden guy there. The man probably oozed money. He fancied you could probably rob him by accident... He hoped...

That was why he smuggled his weapons arsenal across three or four state borders in an old jeep. Wearing jeans, an old T-shirt, and the least conspicuous gas-station sunglasses he could stuff in his pocket, he stood and eyed the building he was led to. He then eyed the address, just to be sure. And then he eyed the colorful cast approaching it.

Rubbing the bridge of his nose and keeping his head down, he followed them in.
I think I'll just boink this again since we're at the 24 hour mark...
<Snipped quote by Polyphemus>

Fitting Dragonfly into a Toyota Camry will be hard.

Fitting Dragonfly and everyone else into a Toyota Camry will be harder than actually taking down the Coalition.

Then comes this issue of it being capable of driving and that hurts to even think about.


The solution is obviously for one of us to go full James-Bond-Villain and purchase a boat-sized 70s muscle car. Armored, of course.

EDIT: Better yet, the company car should be a giant Rolls Royce-styled Tank.
EDIT EDIT: A google search has provided me with knowledge I wish I'd had all my life...

This was a thing!
Well I don't have a mouth!... And everyone knows that Synths always have mouths...
I'm playing the one true human here amidst a bunch of superhumans, witches, and otherwordly beings.


It has yet to be determined whether Domonic is actually super-survivey due to an actual super mutation, or whether he just spent several years of his life training with the Israeli Shaolin. Only science holds the answer... And Science would prefer to smugly withhold that information and snicker whenever somebody gets it wrong.
What's the old phrase about two dicks again?

... Not sure what Damselfly is into, but I'm surprised she hasn't at least given it a chance. I mean, it probably doesn't count as beastiality...
Looks like hiding in one of several jigsaw bases and attempting to personally befriend Mr. Dragonfly before the end of all this might not be such a bad idea...
Once the Coalition is destroyed, our vastly different goals are sure to surface and drive us apart. When there's nothing left to stop us, there should totally be a supervillain battle of doom. Of course, this should be done once everyone has their maximum power and such.
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