tactful cactus

Chavtastic (Cactus & Lovelydame)

Alex had been partying and hooking up since thirteen, and in the five ensuing years, he'd had several flings, and several "girlfriends," but he'd never been particularly interested in seriously dating anyone. It was mostly his budding criminal life that held Alex's attention. Girls were fun, but required so much... work. Time. Attention. Time and attention better spent pushing drugs, fighting, and drinking. So when this girl bumped into him, spilling her books everywhere, a scathing oath rose to Alex's lips. "Watch it, you f--" and was cut short by the girl's wide blue eyes. In fact, most of the air left Alex's lungs and his usually cold, calculating mind was suddenly befogged by hormones. Animal magnetism, he reckoned, was the name for what he felt: the tingling in his fingers, the queer warmth in his cheeks, the tickle rising to his lips. Very few people had ever caught Alex off-guard, and even fewer of them were female. But this girl... this stupid American girl, with her feathery blonde hair and conspicuous cleavage... had bewitched him, instantly, completely, and without warning. "Ehm...." he said stupidly, as his brain kicked back into gear and he helped her gather her books from the floor. "S'alright, luv," he said with a sheepish grin, clutching Ellie's books to his chest. "Hey, you're Ellie, right?" Brian interjected with his slow smile, his faintly bloodshot eyes roving over Ellie's body without restraint. "I met you at Ahmed's party last weekend, I think. Heeey, man," he said, elbowing Alex's ribs, "this chick can smoke." "You like to par'y?" Alex asked, recovering from the hormonal rush somewhat but still stupidly clutching Ellie's books. The corners of his lips curled in an impish smile as he remembered the acid in his jacket.

Chavtastic (Cactus & Lovelydame)

Aight, here's a screencap from the show:

Chavtastic (Cactus & Lovelydame)

Sweet! The only pic I could find of my "inspiration" for Alex's appearance is not a very good picture of him: He's a cast member from this season of Rupaul's Drag Race (which I am obsessed with). So just to be clear, my character is not a drag queen, just physically based off of one. Hah. I'll see if I can't get a screenshot of him with the septum piercing- oh darn, I'll just have to watch the episode again! :'D

Chavtastic (Cactus & Lovelydame)

[[Good god, have you ever... I have never... well, anyway, this should be right now, for real for real.]] Most students at Leeview High saw an ordinary school when they looked at the building's bland brick edifice and faded metal signage. For most students, the school's name evoked tortuously boring lectures, uninspired teachers, and the factory-like churning out of a public education. Most students also saw the place where they met their friends day after day; the warm, moist embryo of their adult personalities and cultural niches. Banal teenage lives ebbed and flowed with the synthetic sound of the school bell as classes began and ended, began and ended, lunch and homeroom and class again. For some, high school was a bastion of hope in a dreary, anti-intellectual world. Some excelled at academics in hopes of a better life at some moderate-to-very prestigious university, where better heads prevailed. When Alexander Black looked at Leeview High, he mostly saw a business opportunity. Originally hailing from London, England, Alex had relocated to this New York suburb not three weeks prior. Though it was the middle of the school year, today was his first day at Leeview, and he kept thinking about unloading the forty tabs of acid, brought all the way from England, tucked in the inner breast pocket of his pristine olive green military-style jacket. He didn't look much like the hooligan he really was, but that was all part of the business model. Look smart, act nice, get away with murder. For this auspicious day, he'd chosen a conservative pair of jeans and a chocolate brown button-down, both which fit his slender body expertly. His sandy blonde hair was combed neatly and tucked behind his ears, and a tasteful hint of expensive cologne preceded him. The only outward indication of Alex's deep-down inner maniac was a tasteful, thin, silver nose ring glittering from his septum. He was early, and slightly nervous. He had some connections to the underground in New York from his mates at home, but he'd met none of them in person yet. Essentially, he was alone in this rather large town. Luckily, Alex was charming and socially adept enough that he would have at least a dozen new friends by the end of the week. And that was the plan, that was his mission: help the Crew take over stateside, one gullible American at a time. Alex sauntered right in the front door of the school with his head held high and his gaze level. Nobody issued him a second glance. Groups of students clustered in the hallways, chattering and laughing and screaming and creating your typical teenage din. Alex inhaled deeply, then exhaled slowly, scanning the clusters of people for a familiar face, any one of the handful of Crew he'd "met" on Facebook. To the left, in an alcove under the stairs, a crowd of fifteen or so all garbed in black and faintly reeking of pot (Alex made a mental note- future customers there); a dozen feet from them were a group of boys in jeans and sweatshirts looking altogether too "normal"; to the left, around some lockers, a group of girls of varying size and shape, all passing around colorful Japanese graphic novels, some of them sporting cat ear headbands, false fox tails, or both; and then he saw them in the corner: A clean-looking group all dressed in preppy, trendy, expensive clothing, all trying very hard to look nonchalant. These were his people, the elite, the cool, the partiers, the kids that all the other kids thought they wanted to be. Alex recognized one boy from Facebook, who was a self-styled stoner, wearing one of those ridiculous Bob Marley tee shirts and with his hair partially dreaded. "What's good, mate?" Alex called in his thick, chavvy English drawl as he approached the other boy for a hand slap. "Nice to finally meet you." "Yeah, yeah man, good to meet you to. Welcome to America, bro." "Fanks. You're Brian, righ'? From Facebook?" As Alex spoke, some of the girls in the group came to attention, intrigued by his exotic pattern of speech. Alex noticed and flashed one of them a smile. "How you doin', dahlin'?"

Chavtastic (Cactus & Lovelydame)

[YIIIKES I POSTED THIS IN THE WRONG FORUM. This is the correct forum. Damn, I feel stupid. Hahaha.] Now it's in the wrong section of the wrong forum. Oops!!!

'Sup bro.

No. Noooo. David Bowie is the one true god. You can be a mini-god, though. :3

thy Cataclysm

Welcome back! I don't know who you are or anything like that, and I'm kinda new myself, but welcome all the same :D

Oops. Please ignore.

(YIIIKES I POSTED THIS IN THE WRONG FORUM. D'oh! Forgive an ignorant noob, how do I fix this... err....)

Hi y'all~

My bio clarifies that while I'm really a cactus, I'm not at all very tactful. It's an oblique David Bowie reference. <3 Mahz- I feel dat. I've watched that gif 23492358 times and I still giggle.

Do cacti roleplay?

Yes. Apparently cacti do indeed roleplay. And this particular cactus likes to roleplay one on one with other cacti. Or humans. Or whatever. (On the internet, nobody knows you're a cactus.)

I rite gud, and i lik u 2 rite gud 2, k?

Really though, I don't have many gripes with writing styles, I'd just like you to write with nice grammar and punctuation to keep my eyes/brain happy, and please write enough that I have something to respond to. I'll do the same for you.

That said, I generally like to write and receive longer posts (several paragraphs up to novel, lol). I like adjectives, and imagery, and descriptiveness... ivity. I consider myself a decent writer. I'd prefer advanced-style roleplays, but I understand that not everyone thinks they're advanced or whatever. But I'm pretty laid back about all that, this is supposed to be fun! So let's just give it a shot and see how it goes!

I'm pretty busy for a cactus, so I can't promise that I'll respond more than once a day, but I'll try! (I'm on Spring Break this week, so I'll be on more often. <3) I might even skip a day. I apologize in advance for any lapses, but roleplaying is just a hobby and sometimes life has to come first. But I'll try to make it up to you when I get back with a big, juicy, new post!

As far as genres, I don't have a ton of ideas but I usually can latch on to others' ideas pretty easily (I guess I'm a parasitic cactus). I prefer to play males, but I'm flexible, and will play MxM, MxF, FxF, or anywhere in between. Also, in addition to being a cactus, I'm a marshmallow; I love romance, but it's certainly not a requirement! It's also great to have some kind of plot, to hang the romance on.

I'll tell you I'm not big on fandoms, I'd much rather play in an original setting. Some ideas...

Medieval/Fantasy
- Rogue Wanderer x Nobility/Royalty
- Mage x Mage (could be rival mages from different sects, disciplines, clans, or kingdoms)
- Knights/Warriors from rival kingdoms/clans
- Shut-in/Recluse Nobility x Someone Else (servant, etc.)

Fantasy Sci-fi
- Evil Genius/Mad Scientist x Someone Else (wide open here, use your imagination- could be one of his creations~)
- Space Pirate x Someone Else (e.g. other space pirate, partner in crime, innocent bystander, etc.)

Modern Fantasy
- Vampire x Human
- Vampire x Vampire
- Super Secret School for the Gifted

Modern
- Dominatrix
- Mafia/Gang/Crime
- Professor x Student
- Mysterious Shut-In x Someone Else (e.g. curious neighbor, delivery/repair person, etc.)

THAT'S ALL I CAN THINK OF BUT I SWEAR THERE'S MORE. I just suck at thinking of stuff when it's helpful, but I'll be on my way to work next week and think of 23423546 amazing ideas and forget them all before I can write them down.

So PM me with whatever you're hankering for, and let's see what we can work out! I look forward to writing with you.

With love and prickles,
Tactful Cactus