Wolvena

Supernatural - Hell On The Horizon

Esme

Esme continued to watch Duke from where she sat. She saw his shoulders relax and was well aware of how hearing his nickname from her affected him. She could never have imagined him waking up without her at his side would cause him to feel this much fear. She could understand a little, but not this much. It made her feel awful for falling asleep against Sarah and not putting up more of a fight to get back to the RV. Sending him into a state of panic and fear was one of the last things she ever wanted to do to him. Esme’s gaze was soft as she watched him limp towards her, eyes never leaving him, then they softened more into a look of apology as she saw the tears in his eyes. She had made Duke feel helpless in his physical state. If something had happened, there was nothing he could have done to come after her or help her. This made her feel even more awful as she kept her eyes on him. Tears stung her eyes for how awful she felt for putting him through all this, especially for what was to come later in the day.

It wasn't until Duke was standing next to her did she noticed that he had opened some of his wounds, but before she could say anything about them, he spoke. “I’m sorry, I….” Esme was cut off by him stumbling in the grass and falling to his knees, and she held out her hands to catch him. Before she knew it, he had her caged in and then leaned her back into Sarah, causing her to gasp lightly. Then, after scanning her face, he kissed her. Closing her eyes, Esme kissed him back just as deeply and worked her arms around him to hold him close. Through her kiss and embrace, she did her best to convey she was sorry for scaring him and that she was alright. When the kiss was broken, she opened her eyes and looked up into Duke's face, taking in his question. She sighed softly as she removed one of her hands from him and reached for her jacket, and grabbed it after Sarah pushed it into her hand. Digging into a pocket, she pulled out a bandana. She did all this without losing eye contact with him. Esme then gently took care of the bleeding wounds as she spoke softly.

“I didn’t mean to sleep out here…. I woke up last night from dreams and couldn’t go back to sleep. I didn’t want to wake you, so I went out for some air.” she told him as she continued to tend to his bleeding wounds. “I then went to the…. The panic room. I felt I needed to. I got worked up and scared Bobby in the process. I left the panic room and needed a way to release it all without waking anyone. So, I came out here and beat the hell out of some mannequins until I could barely lift my arms. I had planned to come back to the RV after I caught my breath. Cason found me out here, and we talked a bit, and Sarah forced me to lie against her and rest. Things got so calm with her curled around me, I fell asleep against her.” Bringing up her free hand, she brushed his hair from his face before cupping his cheek and rubbing it gently with her thumb. “I’m okay.” Esme then pulled his face back to her, kissing his forehead before kissing him deeply. She then wrapped an arm around him, pulling him closer to her.

Esme didn’t want him to feel what the day would bring just yet, she just wanted him to feel the relief of having her there in his arms and the love they both shared for each other. She also wasn’t ready to feel all the emotions that the day would bring once she pulled herself away from Sarah. However, she knew they couldn’t stay here forever and would eventually have to get up and face the day's events.

Supernatural - Hell On The Horizon

Esme

The last thing Esme heard from Cason before passing out was that he would help her and that the name Ryker sounded familiar to him. It brought her some comfort, but she still didn’t want him to get into any sort of trouble by helping her with her requests. She also didn't want Natalia to be hurt or upset by the possible outcome. She knew that, if anything happened to Cason, she would probably never forgive her. But she also knew that if it had anything to do with that damned asylum, Cason would jump on it to keep Natalia safe, even if it felt like it was two different groups of demons involved in the two situations. For the most part, Esme slept the rest of the night peacefully, her mind having retreated to her safe place as it sometimes did when she was so mentally tired or when she was going to fall into one of her deep sleeps. The lush grass of the meadow beneath her, the scent of flowers around her, and the gentle breeze blowing on her face and through her hair. As well as her four-legged companions from her childhood running around below the hill where she sat.

As morning approached, Esme’s safe place slowly faded away into something a lot less happy and peaceful. Darkness surrounded her, grief and guilt weighed down on her heavily, and she was having trouble finding her way out. As the sun rose and shone on the property, fear gripped her tightly in the darkness of her sleep. She fought to find a source of light, and against the crippling emotions bearing down on her. She knew who the fear was coming from, but couldn’t put her finger on who it was at that moment. It was a fear that came from someone who was scared of losing someone. It had been so long since she had felt this fear so strong, it was taking her a moment to realize who it could be coming from. It wasn’t long until she could feel the gentle nudge of Sarah, making her aware that she had fallen asleep, and she was momentarily stuck in her mind/dream. This wasn’t the first time she had been in the position. Stuck in her mind or dream, and slightly aware of what was going on in the waking world. “Damnaidh!” she screamed into the darkness. “Of course, my body would decide to choose today to go comatose!”

“Today is not the day for me to be down for the count. I have to be present for the funeral!” she screamed into the darkness. “I need, no, I have to be by Duke’s side during it! I also should have ended up in bed last night, not here, so I could have been there when he woke up!” closing her eyes, she tried to wake her body up, and to get her eyes to open. As she did, Esms could feel Sarah nudge her again. Esme growled, but her body in the waking world remained still and silent. “Come on! Wake your ass up!” she yelled at herself. Her body did nothing in response, not that that was surprising to her. Opening her eyes, she looked around the darkness. Times of her being here before creeping in on her, as well as the cold the place held, and having no one to pull her out at times. If Duke went looking for her, he didn't know where she was, and he could see Sarah, and she was sure Cason had gone back to Natalia by now. Her only hope was getting herself to wake up or Sarah waking her up.

Esme plopped onto her ass and crossed her legs in frustration just as Sarah nudged her a little more aggressively with a light bark. Sarah’s growing worry wasn’t helping her frustration any. Then it hit her, Duke’s fear. He had woken up to find her gone after falling asleep with her next to him, now he was looking for her and couldn’t find her, sure he’d be scared that something had happened to her. Clenching her fists and squeezing her eyes shut, Esme tried once again to gain control of her body, or at least her mouth. There, she could slightly feel the link that connected her consciousness to her body; it could be just enough to get Sarah to hear her. “Sarah….. Bite me.” Esme’s sleeping form mumbled. Sarah whined in response as she looked down at Esme. “You have….. To….. It’s the only…… Way….. Do it.” Sarah continued to whine, not wanting to hurt Esme in any way, even with being told to by her. “Please…. Sarah.” Esme’s sleeping form begged. Sarah’s ears went back at Esme’s words, but she obediently leaned her head down and took Esme’s left arm into her mouth, ready to do as she was told.

Suddenly, Esme’s eyes popped open at the sound of Duke’s worried voice calling her name. She shot upright just as Sarah bit down on her arm, hissing from the pain from the bite and the soreness of her body. “Good girl, Sarah. Good girl.” she groaned to the hound. “I’ll make sure Cason doesn’t scold you, since I’m sure he told you to wake me gently.” She gave her a smile and a pat on the side, before looking around for Duke from where she sat. Once she saw him, she could see the worry all over his face as well as feel it.“Over here, Bright Eyes!” she called over to him as she lifted an arm and waved to him. Once she knew he had seen her, she rested her arm on her lap after crossing her legs. “Sorry, I scared you. I had planned on being back before you woke up this morning.”

Supernatural - Hell On The Horizon

Esme

Esme was grateful to Cason for staying as she unloaded everything she was holding inside onto him. She hadn’t intended to, but once she started, she couldn't stop the flow of words leaving her mouth. She felt a bit lighter, and Cason also seemed to know exactly how she felt, which helped to an extent as well. It was strange to her that at that moment, out of all the people on this property, Cason was the one who caused her to unload her problems. Never in a million years did she think she would be confiding to someone other than Duke or her godmother, let alone a demon, but it was strangely comforting in a way. It wasn’t until Cason sighed and spoke did Esme turn her eyes to Cason. “Bored, huh?” she replied with a light laugh in her tone. “I can believe that, since you don’t sleep…. I had a few drinks, but not as many as Duke. Whisky and my emotions being on overdrive don’t mix too well. My godmother could tell you a good story about that.” She gave another light laugh as he scanned her face and flashed his polite smile. Her eyes briefly went to the knife in his hand as he played with it.

Esme nodded her head lightly at Cason’s assumption and continued to listen as he spoke, smiling a little at his offer to watch over if she wanted to take a nap. Her smile faded when he shrugged and brought up the others and how the morning would affect them. “Yeah, normally I don’t, unless it’s hatred or rage, but I do feel something from you, which is a bit strange. But yes, things are pretty quiet, except for what I feel coming from a couple of foxes, rabbits, and deer in the distance.” she told him. She softly sighed as her eyes went back to Cason’s knife. “The peace is doing me some good, and I know I should take advantage of it now before everyone gets up. It’s going to be hell for them and me, but even with me being as tired as I am, I’m not sure I could nap if I wanted.” Esme turned her eyes up to the moon and took a deep breath in, then slowly let it out. “Talking would be nice, if you’re really for it, and don’t worry, I won’t tell anyone about the free therapy session. I know how things can get once people know you’ve offered it.”

She lightly laughed. “But other than you, Sarah offers some pretty good therapy. Strangely enough, if she’s close, I don’t feel as much from anyone, but when she’s curled around me, I feel nothing unless I concentrate. It’s like she’s an emotion dampener.” Esme shrugged and fell quiet. When Cason spoke again, she looked over at him, her eyebrows knitting together as she took in what he was saying. ‘Acid burn in the brain? I’ve experienced a similar feeling.’ she thought to herself. She crossed her arms, then brought a hand to her chin in thought. “Demons having accidental emotions?” she whispered thoughtfully. She was pulled from her thoughts by Sarah nudging Cason and herself. Removing her hand from her chin, she placed it on Sarah and patted her. Sarah then moved to sit behind her before lying down. “I have actually heard about it happening, I’m just trying to remember where.” Esme told Cason, drifting back into thought. She tilted her head down, closed her eyes, and crossed her arms across her chest again. “Where did I hear it?” she whispered thoughtfully to herself. With Esme being lost in thought, Sarah took the opportunity to scoot closer to Esme and curl herself around her, then used her head to gently force Esme to lie back into her.

Esme instinctively stretched out her legs, then crossed one over the other. “Oh, right!” she nearly yelled as her eyes popped open. “It’s a rare occurrence, so rare that most consider it a myth or a flat-out lie.” she said, looking over at him. Realizing that she was now lying down, Esme tried to sit up, but Sarah wasn’t having it. She used her head to keep Esme pinned down against her body. Esme sighed heavily and gave up the fight, then continued to talk. “Now that I think about it, I came across a demon years ago that seemed different from most. It was a feeling I got from them. Kind of like what I get off of you.” Running a hand through her hair, she looked up at the moon and returned her hand to her chest. “I haven’t thought about that day in years, or even the journal entries I came across talking about demons feeling emotions like empathy. I honestly thought the entry was some sort of joke at the time. But now…. You’ve made me think differently.” Suppressing a yawn, she looked at Cason before Sarah pulled her attention away by wiggling her nose under one of Esme’s hands.

With a soft smile, Esme slid her hand over Sarah’s muzzle and up to rest on the top of her head.“If you give me a little time, I’m sure I can track down those journals for you.” she offered warmly. Esme rubbed the top of Sarah’s head and opened her mouth slightly to say something else, but closed it again, having second thoughts. ‘Do I really want to ask? Do I truly want to know if he can find the answers?’ she asked herself. It was then she realized how calm it had become, how clear her thoughts were, and how relaxed and heavy her body and eyelids had become. Sarah had pulled a fast one on her while her mind was distracted by Cason’s question. Briefly closing her eyes, she sighed heavily, fighting the sleep that threatened to take her over. “Could you help me with something?” she asked in a tired tone as she looked at him. “I know this could put you in a difficult spot, and if you don’t want to help, it’s fine…. Could you possibly see if there is any truth to the demon deal story, and if there is a demon running around by the name of Ryker?”

“One of the demons I fought ran his mouth….. Said that this Ryker was behind what happened to me in the….. Asylum. If this demon truly exists, it means he is still looking for me and…. Wants to continue what he started, just as Valdin said.” A shiver ran down Esme’s spine at the thought of being in that situation again, and having to fight her way out, or have the others come rescue her if they could find her. Closing her eyes, she turned her head away from Cason, feeling terrible for asking, but he was the only one she knew who could get her the answers. “I just want to know if he’s out there, so that I can prepare myself for if he shows up.” she almost whispered. She wouldn’t admit it to Cason or anyone else, but she was terrified of the thought of Ryker showing up out of the blue and kidnapping her to finish his plans with her. She was no longer human because of him, she didn’t want to fall into his hands and become a monster. Forcing Ryker from her thoughts, Esme focused on Sarah’s large protective body wrapped around her and her steady breathing. Not long after, she lost her battle with sleep, which was made clear by her sighing and nuzzling her face into Sarah’s side.

Supernatural - Hell On The Horizon

Esme

Esme continued to focus on slowing her breathing and on the calm and quiet around her, opening herself up to everything the night had to offer. Other than hearing the nocturnal animals wandering around nearby, Sarah’s breathing, and the sound of bugs, it was quiet, peacefully quiet. With everyone asleep, save for Bobby and Cason, and most of her pent-up emotions now released, she felt she could breathe a little better. Even with the slight burn still within her chest. It felt like this was the calmest she had felt on the property in days, at least while she was awake. Having no one but animals and bugs around her was doing her some good. It wasn’t long before all that changed. Cason had walked out of the house and was making his way to her. Esme tilted her head forward, her chin resting on her chest. ”Of course he’d be the first to find me out here.” she breathed. She did not attempt to open her eyes and looked up at Cason, even after he approached the fence line. At his tease, a slight smirk tugged at the corner of her lips. What a way to break the silence as soon as he shows up.

“You come with jokes. Ha, ha, you’re funny.” she said sarcastically as he got closer. It wasn’t until he dropped down beside her did she open her eyes and look at him. Esme listened as he spoke, and she shook her head softly and decided to answer his questions in a different order. “No, he didn’t take off on foot. Yes, he’s still sleeping.” she half sighed. “I’d be in that bed too if my dreams hadn’t gotten the best of me, and I needed to go….” she trailed off, looking at the house. “Talk to her. No, I had to….” She then brought her gaze to Sarah and then back to Cason. “As for if I’m good….. Am I good?” She gave a breathless laugh and looked past Cason. “If I were good, I wouldn’t be out here beating the hell out of these mannequins to the point where I can barely lift my arms. Hell, I decapitated one. I’m too mentally tired to process all their emotions, let alone my own. It’s too much right now. And I can’t tell Duke that right now with everything he already has weighing on his mind.” Releasing a heavy sigh from her lips, she looked down at her right hand, which was still wrapped around her staff.

Now, realizing she had a death grip on it and her knuckles had gone white. With some effort, she released her grip on the staff, then shifted and forced her legs out from under her, stretching them out in front of her before crossing them. She then pulled her hands into her lap and looked out over the lot. “Anyway, enough about my problems. What are you doing out here? I know I didn’t wake you or scare you like I did Bobby when I kicked that chair into the wall earlier. I figured you’d be with Nat, not wanting to leave her side after everything.” As Esme waited for his response, she absentmindedly played with the charms on her bracelet, her fingers lingering on one in particular that brought her comfort, one that Duke had given her years ago. Though when he gave it to her, it was a necklace. After all this time and adding to a bracelet, she was surprised it had survived all the hell she had been through. She had even managed to get out of the Asylum with it, which was one of the worst times of her life.

Supernatural - Hell On The Horizon

Esme

Esme stared at the now toppled chair against the wall, her eyes filled with tears. Her chest was tight and burned with all the pent-up emotion it held. Kicking the chair across the panic room did nothing to relieve it. She wanted to scream at the top of her lungs, but that would only set a panic throughout the house if anyone heard her, and that was the last thing they needed right now. Punching anything in the room would only result in her damaging her hands and causing Duke to worry about her even more than he already was. Esme was so deep in her mind trying to find a release that she didn’t hear Bobby come down until he spoke to her. She quickly spun around with a gasp and looked at Bobby, noticing the knife in his hand. Sighing heavily, she wiped the tears from her face with both hands and gave him an apologetic look. “I’m sorry, Bobby. I didn’t mean to scare you. I just wanted to come down and….. I did sleep for a bit.” she told him. Sniffling, she walked over to Bobby and stopped at his side, throwing her arms around his neck and hugging him.

She didn’t say anything else until he hugged her back. “I’m sorry again for scaring you. I’m going to go and try to get a little more rest.” she told him softly. Standing on her tiptoes, she placed a soft kiss on Bobby’s cheek, then released him and left the way she had come in. Esme wanted to stay and help him through his grief, but she was too tired mentally to process her own emotions along with his. When her feet touched the gravel of the lot, the cool breeze hit her like a slap to the face. She pulled her jacket tightly around herself and looked at the RV in the distance. Esme then set off, not to the RV but to the firing range with Sarah following closely behind her. With her mind and emotions in overdrive, she couldn't make herself return to the RV with Duke and rest. What she wanted to do was tinker with her car, but couldn’t do that without waking the whole house. Once at the range, she and Sarah grabbed a couple of the mannequins, then took them to a spot far enough away from the house where she wouldn’t disturb anyone with the noise.

After setting up and stabilizing the mannequins enough so that they wouldn’t fall over easily, Esme pulled her collapsed bo staff from her pocket. Flicking the pin and tossing the staff in the air, it expanded to its full length, and she easily caught it as he fell back down. Taking off her jacket and tossing it to the side, she spun the staff in front of herself and above her head a few times before taking a fighting stance. Esme needed to release everything she had pent up within her, and this was the only other way she knew how, beating the crap out of mannequins with her staff. After briefly closing her eyes and taking a few deep breaths, she began her assault on the mannequins full force. She pushed through the physical pain she felt coursing through her body as she visualized them as creatures or demons she had come across that had taken something from her or had royally pissed her off. The assault went on for a good hour and a half, with her throwing out profanities and names under her breath at them. With her final blow, she swung her staff and knocked the head clean off one of the mannequins, then collapsed to her knees, breathing heavily.

Letting her arms hang at her sides, she leaned back her head and rocked back to sit on her legs. Closing her eyes, she breathed in deeply. It had been some time since she had used her staff to release her pent-up grief or anger; she had almost forgotten just how well it worked in draining her. She could easily pass out right where she was and not think twice about it, but also knew it would send Duke into a fit of worry if he couldn’t easily find her when he woke up. Once she had caught her breath and collected herself, she planned on going back to the RV, but that didn’t mean she couldn’t be found before that happened.

All Roads Lead To You

Esme

Esme looked up at Duke, seeing the frown on his face from her words before he shook his head. She looked into his bright blue eyes behind his gunmetal colored mask and took in his words, and her mind began to wander slightly. Could she possibly be overthinking the whole situation with the handsy assholes? Was he really not bothered by the way she took control of the situation? If it were Dean standing there with her, it would be a completely different story. Esme brought herself back and focused on Duke’s words and how he was doing everything he could to lighten her mood and bring her back to where she was earlier. Seeing him smile down at her made it hard for her not to smile back. It was so easy to match his energy and let him influence her into doing things she normally would have thought twice about doing, depending on who the person was. At that moment, she could only assume this was a couple of the many reasons Dean never wanted her to get too close to Duke. But it had been hard not to get wrapped up in who Duke was since they had met.

His last few questions almost broke her into smiling, especially when he moved his hand from the back of her neck and brought it up to pinch her nose, causing her nearly to cross her eyes as she watched his hand. Looking back at his face, she saw the mischief from earlier had returned to his eyes. Placing a hand on his chest, she lightly pushed against him to put a little distance between them, then dropped her head to look at their feet, and sighed dramatically to hide the smile that came to her lips and the laugh that threatened to show itself. She was easily getting swept up in his sweet and mischievous nature again. She shook her head softly as she collected herself and put on a straight and serious face again. “Bandit stuff, huh?” Esme’s tone was calm and serious, it didn’t hold any sign of laughter or teasing. “Something tells me there’s more behind that.” Lifting her head, she looked up into Duke’s face, her eyes narrowed, and no smile. “I think you’re trying to get me drunk. That way I’ll forget about what happened and them, and be fun again, right? I’m not entirely sure how I feel about that.”

She turned her face to the bar momentarily and sighed heavily. “Also, if you get me drunk, you could help me unload these 'trinkets' without complaining too much, too, right?” she asked, looking up at him. “Hmm.” she added thoughtfully. “I wonder what kind of scene that would cause, or what Dean would think. I don’t think he’d take seeing you fishing things out of the front of my dress too well.” Although she was teasing him, the thought of getting tipsy didn’t sound like a bad idea at that moment. They were at a party after all, but she didn’t want to get so drunk she couldn’t walk straight or hold her own. The images playing in her mind became too much for her to handle, and her serious look melted into a grin that was followed by a laugh. Stepping to his side, she linked her arm with his and gave a little tug. “Come on, Mister Oil Tycoon. Let’s go get that drink. I’ll even let you decide what I get….. If you want to, that is.”

Supernatural - Hell On The Horizon

Esme

As Esme lay pinned under Sarah, she laughed softly and looked up at Duke as she stepped around her and Sarah. “Well, if it would make things easier, we could always ask Cason if he’d give you the mark he gave me.” she laughed. “Then you wouldn’t have to worry about where she is all the time.” She was only partly joking about having Cason give Duke the mark she had. She couldn’t help but think it would be a good idea for Duke to see Sarah as she did, but she knew how most hunters felt about Hellhounds. But shouldn’t Sarah being on their side account for something? Turning her attention back to Sarah, Esme watched as Sarah stood and nudged Duke’s face, causing him to freeze. She managed to hold back her laugh until he made his comment. “Well, look at it this way…. It’s better than her hating you and wanting to keep you away from me.” she stated. “It’s that right, girl?” Sarah gave a low bark in response and nuzzled Esme once again. Esme patted Sarah’s head as she tilted her head closer to Sarah’s, and dropped her voice so only Sarah could hear her.

“I know you wouldn't do anything to harm him. In such a short time, we’ve formed such a strong bond, and I know you wouldn’t harm me or do anything that would upset me. But I still can’t help but wonder what would happen if Cason decided to remove the mark that allows me to see you. Or if he decided I no longer needed your protection and told you to leave. Would you obey those orders?” Esme sighed heavily, and Sarah softly whined as she lay on Esme. “I know, I’m sorry. Forget I said that…. Anyway, I need you to get off me so I can get clean clothes and a shower.” She patted Sarah’s side and then gave her a small shove, which caused Sarah to slowly rise and move to the side, before gently biting Esme’s jacket and pulling her upright. Esme stifled her groan from the movement, then slowly took to her feet with Sarah’s help once again. Giving Sarah’s ears a good scratch, she moved away from her and around Duke, making quick work of grabbing some clean clothes, then waited for him to gather his. Once they both had their clean clothes, it seemed as if it didn’t take them any time at all to get inside the house and take a shower, then back to the RV to unwind, relax, and talk.

Several Hours Later

Esme woke with a start, looking to her side, and saw Duke still sleeping next to her. She hadn’t planned on falling asleep since she had felt like she couldn’t after everything. Sighing softly, she looked over at the clock. It was late or early, depending on how you wanted to look at it. She pulled herself from Duke’s embrace, taking special care not to wake him, then slipped out of the bed. Quietly, she slipped into her jeans and walked over to the door, slipped her feet into her boots, grabbed her jacket, and silently slipped out the door, closing it softly behind her. Walking down the steps, she pulled on her jacket, shivering slightly from the cool air. As her feet touched the gravel of the lot, she was greeted by Sarah. “Hey, Sarah.” she whispered as she patted the hound's head with a tired smile. As she stood there, Esme closed her eyes, took in a deep breath, and slowly let it out. The lot was pretty quiet and peaceful, which told her everyone was sleeping, except for Cason, since he didn’t sleep. Opening her eyes, her eyes scanned the lot, stopping on the basement door.

She still hadn’t said goodbye to Mika and hadn’t planned to until there was no one in the basement with her. Esme figured now was the best time, as any, to go down to the basement and work through her goodbye, even if she wasn't entirely sure how Mike would have felt about it. Taking another deep breath, Esme wrapped her arms around herself as she let it out and headed to the basement door with Sarah following closely. She hesitated momentarily at the door after opening it, finding it difficult to descend the stairs. A small nudge from Sarah is what made her step forward and down the stairs. At the bottom, she slowly and quietly walked over to Mika’s body, noticing that her body had already been wrapped, but not her face, to give everyone a chance to say goodbye. Sarah walked in just far enough to where she could keep an eye on Esme and lie down. Esme looked down into Mika’s face, a heavy sigh escaping her lips, and then sat in the chair near her body. “Hey, Mika.” she started in a soft, low tone as she looked into Mika’s face. It still didn’t seem real as she sat there looking at Mika.

“I’m probably the last person you would have thought would come down here or even want to be down here, but it didn’t feel right not coming down and to say a few things, even with how strained it was between us.” She sighed heavily. “First, I want to apologize for keeping my relationship with Dean from you; that wasn’t right. But he should have also told you. Second, I want to apologize for putting you and the others in danger, and almost killing Dean at the Asylum after losing control.” Esme took a breath and looked down at her clenched fists in her lap, fighting against the tears welling up in her eyes. “I still can’t believe you didn’t make it out of that warehouse alive, and for that, I’m also sorry. Maybe you’d still be here if I could have gotten a better handle on the vision I had. Tried harder to trigger it again and saw more, so we could have gotten there sooner, and you would still be here.” Esme tightly closed her eyes, causing her tears to fall and land on the back of her fists. “What was the point of even having the vision if we still ended up losing someone we cared about?”

At that moment, Esme wanted to stand from the chair and throw it across the room, but she forced herself to remain seated. “Since that night, everyone’s emotions have been all over the place. Dean and Duke had one hell of a fight, resulting in him bolting. Cason and I brought him back, which wasn’t easy.” Esme told Mika. She then opened her eyes and looked over at Mika. “I don’t know how you’ve handled them for so long. But I promise you, I’ll do my damndest to keep them from killing each other in their fist fights, and I’ll continue to help Nat through her emotional trauma. I’ll also help keep an eye on the others. Not sure I’ll do as well as you did, but I’ll do my best.” Esme then brought her hands up and wiped the tears from her face with a sniffle. She opened her mouth to say goodbye, but the words wouldn’t come; it felt too final. She wanted to see Mika sit up and say it was all a nasty joke, and that she wanted to work on getting to know each other better and become friends, but she knew it wouldn’t happen.

This wasn’t a joke; Mika was really lying there in front of her, wrapped and ready for her funeral. “I really wish we could have continued to head in the right direction with our friendship.” she whispered. Quickly standing from the chair, she turned with clenched fists and teeth, and kicked it, sending it sliding across the room. The chair hit the wall with a loud clang that echoed through the basement. “I…… I can’t…. Say it.” she cried softly to herself.

Supernatural - Hell On The Horizon

Esme

Hearing Duke laugh at her statement before Anna showed up brought some relief to Esme. If she could make him laugh at a time like this, it showed her that he wasn’t too far gone mentally, like she feared he might be. His reply caused her to hold back her laughter a little. She could see herself positioned between Duke and the others, and fighting anyone who got too close to her or took a swing at Duke. She didn’t like the idea of taking on any member of their group, but she definitely would if she had to. Which made her slightly wonder, who would look the worse after a fight like that, and if any of them would actually take her on. She had quickly shaken the thoughts from her mind as Anna approached and spoke to them. Esme watched Anna’s movements and the way she avoided looking her in the eye, but at least she answered her question. She also took note of how she briefly made eye contact with Duke, telling her that Duke hadn’t scared Anna as much as they had thought. But her using magic and everyone knowing she was human seemed to hit quite differently.

Esme couldn’t help but let this bother her a little, even though Anna had every right to be wary of her. She sighed inwardly, just barely catching the words spoken between Duke and Anna. Her mind had begun to wander as she stood there. She knew Duke accepted her, and Dean had shown he did too, but what about the others? What did they truly think about her now that they knew? Esme was pulled back to the conversation when Anna addressed them both, and then her. She nodded softly after finally making eye contact with Anna. “He’s lucky to have you, Anna.” she started softly. “Of course, I’d like that…. And yes, we’re good.” Esme smiled warmly at Anna, doing her best to show she meant what she said. She would hate it if anything came between their friendship. In the short time they had known each other, she had grown quite fond of the girl. If they spent more time together, she could see their friendship blossom into a more sisterly bond. Esme didn’t turn back to Duke until Anna left to go back to Sam. She closed her eyes and sighed heavily as she shook her head.

“Looks like I was the scariest out of the two of us this time.” she said softly to Duke. “It’s a strange feeling having someone other than a demon be afraid of me…. I guess my actions at the warehouse affected her more than I thought.” Esme’s voice trailed off a bit at the end of her sentence. Opening her eyes, she looked up at Duke, a small, slightly forced smile resting on her lips. “I’ll explain later. Let’s grab some clean clothes and get cleaned up first.” She fully intended to explain everything to him, even if she was a little nervous about how he’d take the news, but she wanted to get the remnants of their bad night off of her first. Without another word, Esme took Duke’s good hand into hers and led the way to the RV to gather their clean clothes so they could take a shower. Other than wanting to shower, she wanted this night to be over; she also wanted to forget about everything that had happened the past three or four days, but that wasn’t happening. There was no way she could forget about any of it, especially the fact that they had lost Mika and the news she had received from the demons.

It was all etched into her memory, and the words of the demons continued to ring in her ears. There was no escaping any of it. Esme still wasn’t sure just how much of what they said she truly believed. She still needed to talk to her godmother about it all, but she was hesitant about that as well. She knew the woman would want to take her and lock her away from the world to keep her safe, just like she did after pulling her out of the asylum those years ago. When Esme and Duke were just feet from the RV, Esme let go of Duke’s hand and turned when she heard the sound of heavy footsteps quickly coming at them, and held up her hands in front of herself. “Sarah, slow down!” she said to the Hellhound. But it was too late, Sarah came sliding across the gravel and slammed into her. Esme hit the ground with a grunt and groan as Sarah landed on top of her. Sarah then proceeded to nuzzle Esme’s face as she whined, happy she was back. Esme groaned as she placed her hands on Sarah and patted her sides as she lightly laughed at the Hellhound’s affection.

“I know, I know. I’m sorry I worried you, girl.” Esme said in a slightly strained soothing tone. “Next time we go on a recovery mission, you can go with us.” she whispered to Sarah. “I could have really used your help tonight.” Esme then moved her hands up to Sarah’s head and scratched behind her ears and the top of her head. “If I had you there tonight, maybe I wouldn’t have ended up in such a rough state.” Sarah gave a light growl in response and laid her head on Esme’s uninjured shoulder and nuzzled into her once more. “I’ll keep that in mind for the next time.” Esme laughed softly as she patted Sarah’s head.

Supernatural - Hell On The Horizon

Esme

As Esme waited for Duke’s response, she moved her hand to rest on his chest, and her mind momentarily drifted back to the times they had used the bucket to get clean. She could hear his voice echoing in her mind, telling her she didn’t have to use the bucket and that he didn’t want her to get cold with how cold the water was, and then somehow, a water fight would break out between them. It caused a slight smile to tug at the corners of her mouth. She was pulled back to the present when Duke responded to her. She softly shook her head as that smile tugged at her lips a bit more. “You’re right about that.” she said softly. She nodded to his statement, then almost clung to him as she felt him pull his good hand away from her. Esme wanted to stay like this just a bit longer, and it surprised her how quickly he reacted to her shower suggestion. When the door opened and the cool night air hit her, she shivered slightly. Duke then surprised her again, before she could slide off his lap, he scooted to the side, dropped to the ground, then slid her down his body until her feet touched ground.

Once on her feet, she wrapped an arm around him and looked up at him with a soft, loving smile. Reaching up, she placed her hand softly on his cheek. “Leave keeping your cast dry to me. As for approaching the others…. We’ll get through that together, but I’m sure they’ll be happy that you're alive and home.” she told him as she rubbed his cheek with her thumb. “Emotions were high earlier, things were said and done. If it hadn’t been you and Dean who fought, it could have easily been two of the others or even me.” Standing on her tiptoes, she pulled his head toward her and kissed his jaw softly. “And besides, if any of them have a problem and come after you, they’ll have to go through me first. I’ll kick anyone's ass who tries to lay a hand on you.” she told him matter-of-factly with a warm smile. Esme knew Duke knew she would do it too, because this wouldn’t be the first time she had done it. More than once in their past, she had stepped up and taken on fights for him.

This point in time was no different, except for the fact that they were now a true couple, and the link between them had grown even stronger than it was back then. “I know you’d do the same for me if I were in your position.” she added, letting her gaze and hand drop to his chest. Esme opened her mouth to say more, but quickly closed it when she felt someone drawing closer to them. She smiled softly when she realized it was Anna. She turned slightly to watch her come into view. “Anna’s coming.” she told him softly. Esme slightly tightened her grip around Duke just before Anna’s face came into view. She knew Anna was glad to see them both alive and okay, but she still wasn’t sure how close Anna wanted to be to her after seeing her use magic earlier that day. “Yes, we are. A little banged up and gross, but okay nonetheless.” she responded in a warm tone. Esme wanted to go and hug her to reassure her, but she remained at Duke’s side. She wanted to leave that choice up to Anna, since she knew she had freaked her out a bit. “How are you holding up, Anna?”

Supernatural - Hell On The Horizon

Esme

Esme watched Duke grappling with what she had told him, like always. No matter how many times she pleaded with him to let her in and share his feelings and thoughts with her, he wouldn’t or couldn’t. It was one of the main reasons she worried about him so much, even back in the day, and was even the cause of most of their arguments. But she was determined to get her words through that thick skull of his and to make him see she was there for him through everything. She was there for the good and the bad and wasn’t leaving him because he lost himself to grief. However, if she were honest with herself, she should be listening to her own words. She wasn’t the greatest at sharing or expressing her own emotions or troubles with anyone, either. Esme often kept them bottled up inside until they finally exploded from her, and that had recently become quite dangerous with her new powers presenting themselves. Like Duke, Esme had only let out a small portion of her emotions to others and bottled and suppressed the majority of them, either out of fear or not wanting to burden others with them.

The only person she had truly been open with was her mother, but after she lost her mother, she never truly opened up to anyone, not even her godmother, to whom she felt she could tell anything. There were a couple she would open up to, but they had fur and four legs. So did they really count? Maybe and maybe not, but that didn’t matter to her; she hadn’t seen them in quite a while, since it had been some time since she had been home with her godmother. She would have to find time to go and visit. She had been away for far too long as it was. Esme also needed to call her godmother and update her on everything that had happened recently. Which she knew would worry her, but also knew she would possibly be able to find some answers to the many questions rolling around in her mind. Some of those answers she was still waiting to hear from Cason, hoping he had found out a few things. Esme was desperate to know if he’d had a chance to find out anything or heard anything from other demons. However, there was a part of her that wondered if she wanted to know the answers. Could she mentally handle the answers with no way to talk to her parents?

When Duke responded to her pleas, Esme sighed inwardly and nearly closed her eyes before he looked into her eyes. “I know.” she said before he continued. She wasn’t expecting him to be good at it, especially with it being new to him. She just wanted him to talk to her and not run off when things got to be too much to handle. A slight smile tugged at the corners of her mouth as he spoke, and she nodded. “You’re welcome, but I couldn’t leave you even if everything inside me was telling me to.” she told him honestly with a small sniffle. “And halfway sounds good. Knowing that much will help my sanity a bit.” She wanted to say more, but Cason suddenly clearing his throat caused her to flinch; she had momentarily forgotten he was there while trying to get through to Duke. Esme sighed heavily at Cason’s words, but also nodded in agreement. Her eyes briefly closed as Duke pulled his hand from hers and wiped away her tears as he replied to Cason. “Yeah, that might be for the best.” she replied to Cason with a sniffle.

About An Hour Later

Esme had stayed quiet the entire ride back to Bobby’s, secretly watching Duke and staying in tune with what emotions she could feel coming from him. Halfway through the ride, she had reached over and taken his hand in hers, just waiting to have something to hold onto and feel that he was there. These close calls of losing him were weighing heavily on her mind, as well as the loss of Mika. As soon as they passed under the sign for the junkyard, Esme’s chest grew tight and achy, making it a bit difficult to breathe. When Cason parked Duke’s truck, she didn’t move; she continued to stare out the window and didn’t attempt to get out. The closing of the door somewhat snapped her back to reality, and she only nodded to Cason’s words, then looked at her and Duke’s hands and intertwined fingers. After a moment of silence, Esme shifted to look at Duke, then carefully pulled herself into his lap, bringing his good arm around her and resting his casted arm in her lap. She then leaned into him, resting her head softly on his shoulder and her forehead resting against his neck without saying a word, just like she did back in the day when either of them needed to be quietly comforted.

She could still remember the times he would pull her into his lap and hug her tightly to his chest whenever she and Dean would disagree about something, and she’d storm off and sit somewhere. In this case, she wanted to feel his arms around her, hear his breathing and heartbeat in her ears, as well as be a comfort for him. As she sat in his lap, she could also remember the times she had pulled him aside and pulled him in close to keep him from bolting, which sometimes worked but not every time. Esme took a breath and slowly let it out as she nuzzled her forehead against Duke’s neck and held his good arm around her. It felt like hardly any time had passed when she felt her phone vibrate in her pocket. Without moving too much, she pulled her phone from her pocket and opened the text that was from Cason. She typed a quick one-handed response and hit send. “Alright, thanks.” She then tucked her phone back into her pocket. “ Cason said Dean is out cold if we want to go inside…. If anything, we can just go in to get cleaned up.” she told him, in a voice just above a whisper. “Unless you just want to use the bucket tonight.”

Even if Dean was out cold, she wasn’t entirely sure he would want to go into the house or not after everything that had happened that night, which she couldn’t blame him. She, on the other hand, preferred the shower over the bucket. There was only so much you could do with a towel and a bucket of water, and there was no way she would feel clean enough to sleep only using them tonight. Whatever he chose, her mind was set firmly on the shower, even though she didn’t want to leave him alone for any length of time.