What tips do you have to make it good? Here's my top suggestions.
1) No more stupid rap song. The metal hybrid music was good, but he only good line was when he paraphrased Simon Wiesenthal.
2) Goku is a kid? We've seen it already. This story should be about new or underdeveloped Saiyans.
3) Do something unusual with the characters. My idea is to have strong female leads, namely Pan and Bra(Bula).
My basic pilot episode:
Pan goes with her mom and grand mother to visit Bulma one day. Bulma is working on a new starship, but stops to talk to them. While she's talking to them, Bra walks up and asks if she can take a break. Bulma tells her that she can stop when she's done calibrating the engine, as she needs to earn money to fix the car she wrecked, to teach her to be a more careful driver. The three women and Pan go upstairs to talk.
After Bulma serves them lemonade, she starts talking about the ship. It's for starting colonies, four times faster than the ship her dad built for Goku, and can use capsules to carry enough supplies for twelve people to survive for a year. Pan mentions that she's a great pilot in simulations, and asks if she can be a test pilot. Videl says no, that she's to young to be traveling around space. Pan counters with the fact that her dad went into space at the age of 6, and Videl says no again. Annoyed, Pan gets up to leave. Her mom asks her where she's going, and she says she was going to take Bra a lemonade. After she leaves, Chi-chi says "I don't know where she gets it from, I wasn't rebelious when I was 14." Videl says that she was, and Bulma mentions that she was too, and that it's just a teenage thing.
Downstairs at the ship, Pan interupts Bra to give her a glass of lemonade. They start talking about how their mom's won't let them do what they want. Bra wants to do something traditionally girley, like open a flower shop or own a bakery. Pan, the tom-boy, wants to be a pilot. Pan says that the only way to get them to allow it is to show them how good they are at their chosen job, and heads for the bridge. Bra chases her down. Pan says that she'll fly this ship to Namek and back to prove that she's a good pilot, and, before Bra can object, she takes off.
When one of the Capsule corp workers tells her that the prototype just took off, Bulma calls it. The girls tell her that they are just going to Namek and back. Videl tells them to turn around at once, but Bra tells them that she hasn't installed the manual control computer yet, so they have to wait until the auto-pilot is done taking them to Namek to turn around. Bulma says that she'll send Trunks in a scout ship to meet them on Namek and bring them the part so that they can get the ship back to Earth.
When Chichi mentions this to Goten, he says that he wants to go too, as he's never been to Namek, and flies over to join Trunks. A day later, Goten leaves the ship to look around, and Trunks stays to wait for the girls.
On the colony ship, the computer informs them that they are arriving on Namek, but they notice that the landing sequence hasn't occurred. They run/fly to the bridge and look outside. There are only stars. Bra then realizes that, because she wasn't finished calabrating the engine when they took off, they could be lightyears off course, and without proper coordinates, as the stars around them aren't in the ship's database yet, they had no way of targeting Earth with a long range distress signal. They started broadcasting a general distress signal so that anyone in the area could hear them, and start scanning for radio signals.
1) No more stupid rap song. The metal hybrid music was good, but he only good line was when he paraphrased Simon Wiesenthal.
2) Goku is a kid? We've seen it already. This story should be about new or underdeveloped Saiyans.
3) Do something unusual with the characters. My idea is to have strong female leads, namely Pan and Bra(Bula).
My basic pilot episode:
Pan goes with her mom and grand mother to visit Bulma one day. Bulma is working on a new starship, but stops to talk to them. While she's talking to them, Bra walks up and asks if she can take a break. Bulma tells her that she can stop when she's done calibrating the engine, as she needs to earn money to fix the car she wrecked, to teach her to be a more careful driver. The three women and Pan go upstairs to talk.
After Bulma serves them lemonade, she starts talking about the ship. It's for starting colonies, four times faster than the ship her dad built for Goku, and can use capsules to carry enough supplies for twelve people to survive for a year. Pan mentions that she's a great pilot in simulations, and asks if she can be a test pilot. Videl says no, that she's to young to be traveling around space. Pan counters with the fact that her dad went into space at the age of 6, and Videl says no again. Annoyed, Pan gets up to leave. Her mom asks her where she's going, and she says she was going to take Bra a lemonade. After she leaves, Chi-chi says "I don't know where she gets it from, I wasn't rebelious when I was 14." Videl says that she was, and Bulma mentions that she was too, and that it's just a teenage thing.
Downstairs at the ship, Pan interupts Bra to give her a glass of lemonade. They start talking about how their mom's won't let them do what they want. Bra wants to do something traditionally girley, like open a flower shop or own a bakery. Pan, the tom-boy, wants to be a pilot. Pan says that the only way to get them to allow it is to show them how good they are at their chosen job, and heads for the bridge. Bra chases her down. Pan says that she'll fly this ship to Namek and back to prove that she's a good pilot, and, before Bra can object, she takes off.
When one of the Capsule corp workers tells her that the prototype just took off, Bulma calls it. The girls tell her that they are just going to Namek and back. Videl tells them to turn around at once, but Bra tells them that she hasn't installed the manual control computer yet, so they have to wait until the auto-pilot is done taking them to Namek to turn around. Bulma says that she'll send Trunks in a scout ship to meet them on Namek and bring them the part so that they can get the ship back to Earth.
When Chichi mentions this to Goten, he says that he wants to go too, as he's never been to Namek, and flies over to join Trunks. A day later, Goten leaves the ship to look around, and Trunks stays to wait for the girls.
On the colony ship, the computer informs them that they are arriving on Namek, but they notice that the landing sequence hasn't occurred. They run/fly to the bridge and look outside. There are only stars. Bra then realizes that, because she wasn't finished calabrating the engine when they took off, they could be lightyears off course, and without proper coordinates, as the stars around them aren't in the ship's database yet, they had no way of targeting Earth with a long range distress signal. They started broadcasting a general distress signal so that anyone in the area could hear them, and start scanning for radio signals.