clanjos

Legend of Zelda: Chains of Fate RP

Name: Dingle Of The House of Tingle

Race: Hylian (Great Fairy)

Appearance: An inhumanly beautiful woman of slender frame and gentle disposition, Dingle wears a suit similar to her adoptive father's, a skintight green spandex unitard with red pants and a massive backpack. She has, in a scabbard at her side, a pirate's cutlass. Though it's usually bunched up in her pointy hat, she has a LOT of hair- it reaches down to the backs of her knees when let loose. It's a vibrant red that isn't that common among Hylians.

Cliches:
Scion of the House of Tingle (4 dice): The greatest hero of Hyrule, Tingle is known as "The Hero of Fairies" for protecting the Fairy Fountains across the land from destruction or corruption during the cataclysm. He has taught her the finer points of being a merchant, negotiating with shopkeepers, how to fly on a balloon, store things in her pants, mapmaking and geography, and looking good in a spandex suit.

Student of the Pirate King (3 dice): Linebeck earned his title of "The Pirate King" by ramming his ship through the heart of Gyorg, saving the Gerudo pirates from its fury. To Dingle, he has passed on the arts of swashbuckling, reading the horizon for weather patterns, navigation, and sailing.

Apprentice of the Garo Master (3 dice): Ingo is the Garo Master, a highly skilled infiltrator and assassin. Quick on his feet and silent in duty, Ingo has done his best to train Dingle in the arts of the Garo- stealth, deception, and acrobatics.

Great Fairy of Kindness (2 Dice): In truth, Dingle is not the daughter of Tingle. She is actually one of the last Great Fairies, the Great Fairy of Kindness. She can (theoretically) heal the sick and wounded, grant boons to noble travelers, enchant weapons, and even resurrect the dead.

Personality:
Dingle has been raised by three of Hyrule's greatest heroes. She's noble, courageous, and merciful, viewing all things as equally deserving of life. However, she was also raised by Tingle. She is greedy, selfish, and tends to demand rupees for services rendered. But never more than a person can reasonably afford.

Backstory:
There is nobody in Hyrule who has not heard of the legendary exploits of Team Rupee. Tingle, the Hero of Fairies, Linebeck, The Pirate King, and Ingo, the Garo Master, are shining beacons of hope in this dark world. Heroes of the downtrodden so omnibenevolent, even Ganondorf must grant them grudging respect. They have traveled from one end of Hyrule to the other, seeking adventure, discovering treasure, and protecting the downtrodden citizens of Hyrule. What very few people know, however, is that Tingle has a daughter. Dingle was found alone in a cave in the Twisted Acres, in a dried-up pool of water, and Tingle raised her as his own child.

However, this isn't entirely true. Tingle DID find Dingle in a cave in the Twisted Acres- specifically, a fairy fountain that was drying up. This would have spelled doom for the infant fairy, so the eccentric merchant hero took her in. Knowing that the healing powers of a Great Fairy might be sufficient to cure the corruption of the Lost Acres, Team Rupee set to training the girl to be all she could be. After all, they were getting on in years, and the girl would need to know how to defend herself to protect a fairy fountain... and get the rupees to live well.

Twenty years later, she's joined up with the caravan to make a shitton of rupees and get her fountain repaired so she can begin the work of healing the forest's wounds.

Digimon Adventure Redux

"Oi, wanker, wake up. OI. WAKE UP. OI!"

A black dinosaur, about shoulder-height, stood prodding an unconscious, short, black-haired boy with its foot. The dinosaur looked over at the other monsters present.

"I fink 'es dead. So do I filch the digivoyce, o'what?"

Back on the Rails - A Multiverse RP

Name: Richard "Dick" Wrole
Age: 25
Appearance: A blonde man with greenish, tired eyes and a red sweatshirt, he usually wears jeans. He's now got a rotary dial from a phone booth in his pocket.

Powers/Equipment: The H-Dial, a mystical device with the ability to transform its user into a range of strange and incredible heroes. These heroes tend toward the Cape aesthetic, but some of them can be downright strange- IE, Cock-A-Hoop, Boy Chimney, and Daffodil Host. The downside to the dial: Dick doesn't get to choose WHICH hero he turns into, and some of the powers are eccentric. Case in point, Flamewar, who can set things on fire by insulting them, Robby Go-Go, with the power of Super-Disco, or Pelican Army, who is a hivemind composed of thousands of pelicans and a telepathic redcoat soldier.

Personality: Had someone said "Take this magic rotary dial and go beat up evil things," he would have jumped at the call. Granted, he'd probably ask what the hell the person was on, talking about magic rotary dials and interdimensional superheroes, but it's a fair question when dealing with wackos. He's a man of moderate intelligence and has a patchwork knowledge of many subjects, mostly involving biology, computers, and physics, although nothing too specialized. He's torn between how awesome being a superhero is and how weird his various forms are.

Brief Backstory: An American with a love of all things superhero, he's visiting the island to take a break from college. His family's a little rough right now, but hopefully a vacation's just what he needs. Besides, ruins are awesome. And volcanoes, dormant or otherwise, are EXTREMELY awesome.

Other: PELICAN ARMY!

Digimon Adventure Redux

I'm not one to turn down an invite.

Massive Multiversal Crossover

Shocker+: The Chibu Corps

Five of them. Five giant monsters that had stood against the Titans and destroyed them effortlessly. The names always called out before the flash of light: Birdon, Neo Pandon, Kyrieloid, Enzan, and Moetaranga. First, they had burnt away the colossal Titan without skin, and then the sleeping Titans within the city's walls had fallen before them, and then a female Titan. At first, it seemed like the loss of the wall would be the death of the city... But for the past few weeks, these protectors had torn through the attacking Titans like wheat. But this Titan was different. It was intelligent, and the giant beasts were nowhere to be seen. Eren knew this was his time to shine, to show what he and the rest of his squad had learned. After so much of the city's authority disappeared, the people needed to know that they didn't have to rely on strange crea-

MONSLIVE! NEO PANDON!
MONSLIVE! BIRDON!

FUCK.

At this point, the five monsters didn't even come out in full force. He threw his hands up in defeat, grumbling as the giant chicken bit the head off the Titan and incinerated the body before stomping its head into jelly. This was just another day in the life. But that strange dancing golden figure people had seen around the city... he'd actually come forward. Addressed the town square. Said that there would be an announcement from a representative of the one responsible for the Titan-killing monsters. That was supposed to be soon. Here was hoping it was somewhat interesting.

---

The Town Square, Later that Day

Up on stage, two hooded figures stood on either side of a podium, tied-up standards on either side of the stage. The city had lapsed into chaos and madness with the government gone along with the Titans, but these men claimed to be the reason that crime and lack of civil services were the worst of the people's problems. A fifth figure strode up behind the stage, this one... floating off the ground somewhat.

"Bonjour, citizens of an abandoned city! We are the Chibu Corps, protectors of humanity... and slayers of Titans. Like you, our homes were long ago beset by giants as well, far larger and more powerful than the ones you face. These... Titans of Light, we shall call them, sought out our explorers, adventurers, hunters, and merchants in order to destroy them for 'being where they do not belong...' They sought to shackle us to but one world! Yes, your plight spoke to us. For we are brothers, crushed under the heels of giants! But you did not have the advantages we did. We had giants of our own, giants like the ones we have used to destroy the Titans which plague you! Like us, you have fought back with all your might, and you have prospered! Because of your perseverance, we have come, from distant worlds."

The hooded figure removed his cloak, letting it fall to the ground. Though the floating creature, all brain and tentacle, was greeted by screams at first, a respectful silence came over the crowd as they remembered that this was the being that helped save them from the Titans.

"Though your defenders vanish, though your king has abandoned you, you are not alone. For we have come to bring you into a cosmic brotherhood of those who have been oppressed, ignored, destroyed, and risen above the heel of those who would use their power to destroy what you hold dear! We invite you into the brotherhood... of Shocker+! Join us, and never be trod underfoot again- by man, king, or Titan!"

The other hooded figures removed their cloaks as well, letting them fall to the ground. At first, another scream scream... but then, cheers. The Titanslayers. The beings from beyond the stars, here to help the humans live safely. Here to help defend them from those who would crush them. It was hard to say no to the help of friendly neighbors in the absence of their leaders and regular defenders. The standards unfurled, revealing a two-headed eagle clutching something in its claws.

"Bon, bon, bon! I see you like this agreement! Well then... it is time for us to wipe out what is left of the Titans! Adieu!"

===

Shocker+: IMAGIN ALL THE PEOPLE

The pink-haired little girl sat in the street, crying over a cat, dying from cold and wet. In the shadows, two red eyes looked out as a small, white creature- seemingly equal parts cat and rabbit- began walking out to the girl.

"Contract? I can make mi-"

The crabbit, however, was interrupted by a booming voice as sand began dropping from her clothes.

"SPEAK YOUR WISH, YOUNG LADY. YOU MAY HAVE ANY ONE WISH."

The girl gasped, jumping away from the cat as a torso made of sand, with dangling legs, formed in front of her. The creature coughed and crossed its arms.

"TO GRANT THE WISH OF THE DOWNTRODDEN... TO ALTER TIME TO BUILD A BRIGHTER FUTURE... THAT IS THE PURPOSE OF THE IMAGIN."

Still nothing. Did he pick a deaf kid or something? "THE COURSE OF DESTINY IS IN YOUR HANDS. SPEAK YOUR WISH AND IT WILL BE SO."

"Um... well... can... can you save this cat? Make sure it doesn't die?"

The sand-man sputtered. Usually the wishes were a bit more effort-intensive. Grab absurd amounts of money, beat up a Yakuza boss... all sorts of things along those lines. "...uh... _{I gotta admit that's a little out of the usual ballpark. But... UH y-YE,} *ahem* YOUR WISH SHALL BE GRANTED."

The sandy torso pulled itself out of the ground, now a full body. It stretched before picking up the cat and running off at top speed, passing several buses along the way before dropping off the cat at the emergency room of the local veterinarian... and forcing a few technicians and vets into the room for good measure. As they began to warm up the cat, life and energy slowly returned to it. The rabbit turned to leave, collapsing into sand.

"THE CONTRACT HAS BEEN FULFILLED."
---
The blue-hair girl sat crying in the hospital, having visited a childhood friend. That accident... it meant he could never play the violin again. The cat-rabbit thing, again, slunk out of the shadows... and was once again interrupted by the appearance of a sandman, spreading acoss the floor.

"THIS WORLD IS CRUEL AND UNJUST, YOUNG GIRL... BUT WE IMAGIN EXIST TO CHANGE THIS. SPEAK ANY WISH AND IT SHALL BE YOURS."

"If... if you can make Kyosuke well again... Let him play the vio-"

"_{oh for fuck's sake, I thought Rabbit was kidding about this high school drama bullshit...} YOUR WISH SHALL BE GRANTED."

Pulling himself out of the ground, this sandman pulled a communicator, stepping through a bathroom door into a desert.. "Hey, Rabbit? Yeah, pull the GaohLiner around. We gotta make a trip. Yeah. Yeah, Athas should work."

Ten minutes later, a short, stocky bearded man in a loincloth barged into the hospital room, waving a staff and shouting a strange language as the sleeping boy's hand and body returned to normal. The man nodded and left, returning to the desert behind the door. The jellyfish Imagin nodded.

"THE CONTRACT HAS BEEN FULFILLED."
---
Several weeks had passed. No despair. No witches. The ones that were SUPPOSED to be there had been destroyed and their grief seeds rendered useless. QB was pissed. But tonight, something big was happening. A parade of silhouetted magical girls walked through the city streets, in advance of a giant construct of gears and magic. Walpurgisnacht was upon them. To stop it, it would require magical girls. And here they were- blue hair, pink hair, black hair with glasses, and all the rest. The crabbit had one last chance.

"Contract? I can ma-" "SIEG SHOCKER!" OH FOR FUCK'S SAKE!

The skies darkened as, far above, tremendous humanoid shapes flew into formation, blotting out the sun. Drawing rifles, they leveled them downward... and began firing. Bullets half a foot in diameter impacted the gear-creature. Though they did almost nothing, the rain did not stop- pushing it downward, slowly, chipping off small chunks of the gear. Soon, ammo depleted, the first volley moved to reload. Walpurgisnact spun up its gears, trying to ascend to reach the first rank of Zakus... only to be met by fire from the second rank of the green giants. The first rank resumed their fire, aiming to flip the giant witch over as a shadowy figure walked beneath Walpurgisnacht, drawing a black device. As it opened up, a black cloud shot up, engulfing the titanic witch... and leaving a tremendous black cloud in its place. Sufficiently weakened, the shadowy figure leaned down and picked up a doll like the ones the Chibu Corps carried about... though this one an effigy of the fallen Witch.
---
"THE FINAL CONTRACT IS COMPLETE."

That was it. The one wish uniting the hearts and minds of everyone in this city at that moment, and the Gaoh Liner- and the Imagin within- were absorbing the energy from granting it. Jellyfish and Rabbit placed the figurine of the reality-distorting witch onto a shelf, looking out the window as reality warped around them. In this world, wishes had power. The world was malleable. And it was about to be reshaped in the image of Shocker. A green wave was spreading across the land, forever altering the face of the world of the magical girls.

Massive Multiversal Crossover

Takahara looked down at his watch. Across many worlds, the fun was starting.
===

Shocker+: The Chibu Corps

A black-haired young man and several others about his age stood on top of a castle wall, looking out over the horizon.

...We all survived the fall of Wall Maria and completed our training. We survived so many hardships, and today, we take the fight to the Titans!

It was then that a tremendous, skinless figure appeared in a flash of lightning behind him, kicking in the city gates and sweeping the defensive cannons off the wall.

Ah shit! The wall's broken and the Titans are gonna get in! And the people will get eaten by the Titans! And the land will get taken over by the Titans!

As the smaller giants rushed into the hole made by their titanic companion, three figures in a shadowy alleyway drew strange dolls, along with red and silver devices. Placing the devices to the foot of the dolls, the devices called out in unison:

MONSLIVE! NEO PANDON!
MONSLIVE! KYRIELOID!
MONSLIVE! BIRDON!

a few of the Titans on the ground looked up as they raised a human toward their mouth... only to be crushed with a sickly crunch by the immense weight of creatures even larger than the skinless giant. The humans of the city looked on in awe and terror as the creatures walked forward, crushing the Titans that so terrorized them like they were rotten fruit. Of course, that would do them no good if the neck of the Titan wasn't destroyed... which seemed to be the case as the dragon-creature and bird-creature brought their feet down, slicing the head and neck of the Titans to ribbons as they advanced toward the larger one. The skinless beast seemed to maintain its focus on the man on the wall... which proved to be its undoing.

First came the razor-sharp beak of Birdon, able to cut steel and mortar as easily as paper. It pecked into the creature's skull, injecting a poison that had stopped the hearts of far larger prey. Next, Neo Pandon's heads began breathing fire, melting away the sections of stone wall where the flames passed, bathing the Colossal titan- the only creature present a match for their size and strength- in a blazing inferno as the boy on the wall turned in fury at the creatures that would dare steal his kill. This was soon irrelevant, as the Kyrieloid jumped over the other two monsters, a blazing flame cloaking its fist as it slammed into the ground, a tremendous eruption of magma shooting up and melting away what remained of the wall. When the smoke cleared, there was a long, ashen cavity up the bisected form of the colossal Titan where its spine, head, and neck used to be- the line of the volcanic blast and flaming attacks of the monsters. The arms and legs fell to the ground, limp and lifeless. The three monsters proceeded to laugh.

On the opposite wall, a golden humanoid stood dancing, pelvic thrusting and laughing at the quick work his comrades made of these knockoff Ultramen. He raised his own silver device to his mouth and began speaking into it.

"Alien Commander Exceller, this is Sergeant P'ultoi with a progress report! The first of the Colossal Titans has been swept aside like teeny little rats... but it seems there are several built into the walls. Want we should make some Sparkdolls, or just salt the earth?"

"Already dead? Magnifique! These Titans are less than merde in comparison to the might of Shocker+! They will make an excellent display of our power... After all, we can not let the Kaijin or Shocker Cyborgs outdo us! Finir your extermination, P'ultoi. They aren't worth the Dark Spark Power. Soon, our Great Leader's plans will come to fruition, and Shocker+'s power- The power of the GREAT LEADER- shall bring the worlds to their knees!"

The golden man on the castle wall and the voice over the communicator-cum-transformation device shared a maniacal laugh in unison.
===

Shocker+: Team Thunderbolt

You're heading to Athas. It's kind of a shithole.

Eric Bolton, alias Mr. Thunder, grumbled. That was a heck of an understatement. The dark red sun of Athas beat down, making the slog in the Thunderbolt Gang's signature masks miserable. But Takahara, an accountant who had worked for him under Thunderbolt, and later as an accountant for Lexcorp (and, off the record, the Legion of Doom) had a great head for business. If Takahara saw a business opportunity here, then it was worth using the J-Dial to get here and skip the Gith blockade which normally tried to keep travellers out... for their own safety.

Once a blue planet teeming with life, Athas had since been stripped of its fertility by the use of corrupting magic and the decay of its sun, now a red giant. It was a sun-burnt land forsaken by the gods, water, and hope. The natural resources had been depleted and a lack of metal had resulted in the use of wood, obsidian and bone for weapons, tools and other common equipment. In such a harsh and unforgiving land, even the most mundane of creatures has developed psionic abilities in response to the constant struggle for survival.

Knowing Takahara, everything wrong with this shithole planet would factor into his plans eventually. But for now, the men of the Thunderbolt Gang had a job- and thanks to the blueprints they stole from the Central City evidence locker, it was going to be a lot easier. Their tremendous metal war machines came in as the J-Dial continued ringing without pause, more and more of the Thunderbolt Gang's masked henchmen coming into the endless desert of Athas. They looked down into a fairly protected valley, far away from any of the cities or villages and still barren of life... for now.

"Okay boys, you remember what Boss Shocker said! We're going to make this miserable place a lot better... and earn our weight in gold doing it! First, use Captain Cold's freeze ray to whip up a lot of ice!"

The masked men raised their cryoguns, spraying an ever-growing glacier onto the desert valley below. One of the tanks readied its own weapon, giving off a low whirring sound as it began to build up power.

"Next, Heat Wave's Thermo-Ray! We'll melt that ice and turn this little crapsack of a valley into an oasis!"

The tank finally fired, a red beam streaking down to melt the ice, the parched earth gulping the water down- the first water this valley saw in ages.

"Now for the important part! That daffy dame from Gotham, Poison Ivy, gave Takahara some special seeds for this! Get to work spreadin' em!"

A few hours and a lunch break later, Mr. Thunder reached to his side and pointed a wand- actually a complex mechanical device- skyward. Several of the other Thunderbolt Gang members did the same.

"And now... we use the wand of the Weather Wizard to call up a downpour!"

Large, black clouds formed overhead as they spun the wands over their heads, thunder rumbling and a gentle wind picking up- both strange sights in this barren world. Sure to attract attention from locals. Well, that was why they had the rest of the Rogues' designs, and a few more surprises from the evidence lockers of their home universe. Already, Poison Ivy's seeds were breaking through the sand to form a beautiful island of water, greenery, and life in the ocean of misery, sand, and death.
===

Shocker+: The Black Mist Wrestling Federation

The Demon Making Plant. Located in the scenic forests of Mt. Fuji. Home of the greatest evil supermen of this world. A perfect place for a man hoping to find mighty warriors to strengthen an evil Organization. Two cloaked figures walked through the doors, into a room where a blood-stained wrestling ring sat. They'd called ahead and challenged the wrestlers here to a match. Of course, there was an etiquette among wrestlers, and that required showmanship. Sunshine, the head of the dMP, stepped out of the shadows on the other side of the room, a staged training exercise for their guests- and the cameras- underway. They'd already completed the secretive Twelve-Hour Muscle Hell training regimen for the day. Sunshine the Sand Monster spoke up, crossing his arms and standing before the ring.

"Those robes... are you two with the Hell Missionaries?"

"No... I represent a New World Order... a Worlds-wide Wrestling Federation... and we're here to put your Bad Attitude to good use."

Sunshine's sandy face turned into a grimace of suspicion. That... was a voice he knew. It wasn't the one from the phone call, though- that was an ex-accountant from the dMP asking if a few of Sunshine's wrestlers could put some recruits for his stable through the ringer. This, though... this was...

"I know that voice... You're... you were banned from the Superman Wrestling Circuit thirty years ago!"

The hooded figure threw away his cloak and began laughing, echoing throughout the gynmasium.

"And now, free from the shackles of the Aztec demon Luar, The Black Mist Federation returns! The 20th century's most brutal stable of Supermen! And with my 13 Superman Cyborgs, I have come to challenge the dMP for the services of its students- if I win, I shall have my pick of them for Black Mist's future endeavors!"

Sunshine took a step back, gritting his teeth. This... wasn't what he expected. He'd worked out a deal with Takahara to showcase some of the dMp's talent during a big gladiatorial thing coming up, but he'd assumed that the people he put in the ringer wouldn't be veteran Brutal Supermen like Black Mist. Still, a good test of the skills of his students.

"What's the matter, Sunshine? Is it that I, Satan Demon, and my comrade Red Bloody Hell are so terrifying that you can not speak?!"

"Not so much, old man! The Demon Making Plant accepts your challenge! But if we win, you're working to teach our students. Best of three, three of your wrestlers versus three dMP supermen!"

The omnipresent ringside announcers chimed in.
What a horrible turn of events! That once-banished Dark Wrestling Federation, Black Mist, has returned to challenge the students of the dMP for their membership in the stable! It looks like the matchup's going to be...

First, we'll have Senketsu "Red Bloody" Hell vs. the dMP's Boaconda!
Next Black Mist's Cyborg Soldier "Bloody Hornet" will face off against The Pumpinator!
And finally, the oddly familiar Devil Spider will see if his wicked web can ensnare Hercules Beat-All!

No matter how this goes, the Superman Wrestling Circuit will never be the same! Black Mist, whose wrestlers were so brutal they were supposed to be forever banned from competitive events, and the dMP, the academy where evil Supermen go to learn the violent techniques the Black Mist Federation perfected! The future of the sport may hang in the balance, so... Let the match begin!

Titans Together!

This might be the longest night in history.

The Elementals (Chemical elemental characters)

Name: Mitchell Malone, The Meteorite Man
Element: Iridium
Age: 35
Gender: Male

Appearance:
Before: Okay, punk...
After: Let's Rock!

Powers: Iridium is ABSURDLY heavy. And, since it's most common in asteroids and meteors, he has the powers necessary for being a human asteroid- immunity to extreme heat and cold, rapid flight, and being nigh-indestructible.

Weapons: An acetylene torch and a warhammer made from "Thunderbolt Iron," which is what ancient civilizations thought the meteors containing Iridium were.

Backstory: 15 years ago, Mitchell Malone was the henchman of a mob boss named Mr. Thunderbolt. During a heist gone wrong at the Armour Chemical Plant in Chicago, Mitchell dropped into a chemical vat during a heist gone wrong. He then made the mistake of uttering the phrase "how could this possibly get any worse," as a meteorite splashed down into the vat. The chemical brew was a powerful experimental molecular adhesive, binding Mithcell's cells to the most common material in the meteorite- iridium. The rest of the crew ran off, leaving Mitchell alone. He pulled himself out of the vat, certain he should have died, and had an epiphany- he had to change. To leave his life of crime and sin behind. He cut a deal with the police, telling them everything he knew, and had his sentence reduced to ten years. After five years out of Sing-Sing, he has donned the mantle of Meteorite Man, using his fantastic powers to stop evil in its tracks! But... just because he's gone straight doesn't mean he's left the Chicago Way behind.

Back on the Rails - A Multiverse RP

Name: Richard "Dick" Wrole
Age: 25
Appearance: A blonde man with greenish, tired eyes and a red sweatshirt, he usually wears jeans. He's now got a rotary dial from a phone booth in his pocket.

Powers/Equipment: The H-Dial, a mystical device with the ability to transform its user into a range of strange and incredible heroes. These heroes tend toward the Cape aesthetic, but some of them can be downright strange- IE, Cock-A-Hoop, Boy Chimney, and Daffodil Host. The downside to the dial: Dick doesn't get to choose WHICH hero he turns into, and some of the powers are eccentric. Case in point, Flamewar, who can set things on fire by insulting them, or Pelican Army, who is a hivemind composed of pelicans and a telepathic redcoat soldier.

Personality: Had someone said "Take this magic rotary dial and go beat up evil things," he would have jumped at the call. Granted, he'd probably ask what the hell the person was on, talking about magic rotary dials and interdimensional superheroes, but it's a fair question when dealing with wackos. He's a man of moderate intelligence and has a patchwork knowledge of many subjects, mostly involving biology, computers, and physics, although nothing too specialized. He's torn between how awesome being a superhero is and how weird his various forms are.

Brief Backstory: An American with a love of all things superhero, he's visiting the island to take a break from college. His family's a little rough right now, but hopefully a vacation's just what he needs. Besides, ruins are awesome. And volcanoes, dormant or otherwise, are EXTREMELY awesome.

Other: PELICAN ARMY!

Monsters Hotel

"Iunno. Blacksmith, wizard, healer, witchdoctor. Depends on what people need. I'm better at the blacksmithing, though. Family's been doing it since before the Romans. Just... things got kinda fucked up when the government of Somalia collapsed and now every two-bit asshole with a machete's declaring himself the grand poobah of cocktrumpet mountain and choppin' up anyone who disagrees."