Avatar of Etranger
  • Last Seen: 6 mos ago
  • Joined: 7 yrs ago
  • Posts: 371 (0.15 / day)
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    1. Etranger 7 yrs ago

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5 yrs ago
Current Felt smug, might delete later
2 likes
6 yrs ago
Tfw you always thought of months between posts as being a long time...and now there's month long gaps between your own posts
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Most Recent Posts

I'll join too.
I'm dooooown.
As Theresa continued her quiet little freakout, many things she could barely comprehend and certainly barely cared about occurred around her. There was some weird creature joining them at the table, some wizard people were yelling about magic and something else was telling about a "worldstar", and to top it all off, someone had just thrown their own head onto their table. It was like sensory overload on steroids which had been injected with acid which had been laced with amphetamines. It was so much that Theresa felt herself slipping into a state of numb shock, unable to muster greater and greater levels of surprise and bafflement to the point she doubled back into a sort of apathy. What the heck could she say or do about this that would mean anything?

However, when the head on their table began to speak, Theresa was almost glad to hear what it had to say. Not that it was especially pleasing in of itself, but at the very least, someone had come to them to offer them a clear line of action. Between everyone else being mystified as to what was happening, and the general uncertainty of the whole situation, Theresa was keen to acquire some answers. "So, um-" She caught herself as she raised her voice, still highly unaccustomed to the deeply masculine sound of it. "I think we should go to the council thingy. They have answers, I want answers. IthinkI'mdefinitelygoingtothecouncilthingymyself." The last sentence was spat out rapid fire out of a mix of anxiety and eagerness to get going. She really wanted someone who knew what the heck they were talking about to explain every last misbegotten detail about this ridiculous world they had found themselves in. If nobody was about to stop her, she was going to just dash right over to the building Miska had directed them to.
I'll keep an eye on this too.
I'll just squeeze on in here.
I'll keep an eye on this for now.
Still here. Technically due for a post, but I just kept putting it off.
I'm down!
When the madness began back at Craig's house, Theresa was less concerned than would seem appropriate. Her initial thoughts were that Craig had spent an obnoxious sum of money trying to put together a little show to impress them or something. After all, if he was tasteless enough to eat junk food from precious finery, then he must have been batty enough to organise this mess just to create "ambience". Perhaps they were starting their campaign in the midst of an earthquake? It became less easy for Theresa to write off what was happening as the manual began to float and flip pages autonomously. As light engulfed the room, Theresa had well and truly begun to panic.

She awoke to the distinct sensation of feeling heavy. She initially chalked it up to a groggy sensation. They appeared to have been taken somewhere. Theresa's immediate instinct was to wonder if Craig had drugged them all to drag them off. She had always suspected he had something of a rapist/kidnapper vibe to him. How could she be sure they all hadn't been violated while they were out cold? As much as her thoughts raced with wild possibilities, the more worrying prospect was their surroundings. Being in some sort of medieval tavern was one thing, but she it was painfully clear that some of the people around her were not at all human. She wanted to say they were all in costume, but their "costumes" were too elaborate and realistic to be artificial.

As Theresa continued to take everything in, an even more insane fact became apparent. The people closest to her appeared to be the characters of the others from her group. Given the way they were talking, Theresa was quite convinced they actually were the others from her group. They all seemed equally confused with what was happening, too. "So then..." Theresa began, swiftly halting her speech at the sound of her own voice. Only, she would not describe it as her own voice. It was much deeper, masculine even. Looking at herself, her hypothesis was confirmed; she was dressed in platemail befitting a knightly paladin. It was almost assuredly Alistair's platemail. Patting herself over, the feel of every masculine feature of her body further confirmed her fears. Her solid muscles, her square jawline, it was nothing like the pasty nerd of a woman she was supposed to be. Lastly, her hands reached for her crotch, and a final conclusion was reached. "That's a penis." She whispered to herself as faintly as possible. It was like a final admission that she was very much no longer Theresa Albern, at least not on the physical level.

As the others puzzled over their dilemma, Theresa, or Alistair as it were, sat still and internally fretted over what was going on. She was not the type to take charge in a crisis, and even if she were, what on earth could she possibly suggest in this fantastical scenario?
For the umpteenth time, Theresa questioned why she was still here. The answer was simple enough in theory; she had come here to get out of her comfort zone and challenge herself to be a functioning adult for once in her life. The only problem was she had the misfortune to choose to embed herself in a group with a degenerate man-child for a leader. While Theresa imagined she had little ground to stand on, at least she could claim not to inflict her obnoxiousness upon others if she could help it. Craig almost seemed to revel in acting like a pustule on the face of society. Here he was, gorging himself with common snacks, resting them upon finery befitting a man of a far greater caliber than himself. He was like a living metaphor for the rot in society. It did not help matters that he was one of the most horrendous roleplayers Theresa had ever known. She had preferred to roleplay online before this, and even on the bowels of the internet had she not encountered anything so overtly disgusting, though that may be trumped up to good fortune on her part. Nobody would know it from looking at her, but she had mentally driven needles into Craig's neck multiple times over the course of these sessions.

As much as his attitude bothered her, she was sometimes thankful for his inattentiveness. Today she had submitted a character produced in a rare spate of idealism on her part, accompanied by an equally idealised piece of lore to accompany Craig's realm of myriad juxtapositions. She was already thinking about how silly it was, and thanking the stars that Craig didn't really bother to look at it very closely. If he had, she imagined the malignant tumour would have had some crass commentary on it. It really was a blessing to go unnoticed sometimes, even if it was contrary to the point of her coming here.

Indulging in one of Alex's sandwiches, the topic of conversation turned to one of familiarity as they all awaited the beginning of Craig's campaign. "When do things not seem like we haven't done them a thousand times?" Theresa remarked listlessly. Sometimes she felt like every day was a repeat of the last. Granted, on her end, it was probably because she didn't get out as much as she should, but with this group, it did feel like the bulk of instances revolved around watching Craig act like an ass with little variation in poor behavior.
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