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    1. HHShetland 11 yrs ago

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10 yrs ago
Current Please note: I feel like I'm not cut out for RPing, so I've chosen to leave. Will log off now.

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@ClocktowerEchos

They might, if they were in the same room. Which they were not. Zhang was talking to an invisible tin man; and an invisible knight, too. :V
I'd just like to say that I fully approve of the unexpected direction this RP has taken. :P
@Earnest Evans

With the situation inside the bar seemingly resolved, Gov. tried his best to focus his analytical and perception circuits on his current job; the sooner it was over with, the sooner he could move to a more discreet location and make a dash again.

Before he could think on that plan further, he was approached by a pair of locals. One of them was an old-looking fellow with a beard right out of one of those J.R.R. Tolkein novels all of the 'nerds' liked to talk about. Or they used to, anyway, before the nuclear attack evidently made everyone illiterate.

From the looks of things, the fellow accompanying him was some kind of garbage man who'd had an accident with a welder and a stuffed Deer's head, or something equally ludicrous. Evidently the nuclear attack made everybody extremely accident-prone well. Made him sick, the mess they made everywhere.

Switching over to his rather light 'helpfulness' subroutines once the man with the beard started talking, however, he realised that maybe he could start off that distraction he needed after all, if he could set a mob after this 'danger to the community'. The same 'Vault Dweller' individual they were talking about at the forum, he concluded was the most likely scenario.

"Vault suit?" He replied to the man's query with his usual officious tone, the lights on the head lighting up as he 'spoke'. "...Like on the Bobbleheads? I am afraid I have not, citizen. ...That being said, there is most certainly an individual in there who has gotten someone in the community angered and hysterical; no surprise, if it's the man I think you're talking about. I have recorded what sounded like the prelude to a textbook hillbilly brawl in there. Perhaps you'd recognise this 'Vault Dweller's voice. Be glad this information doesn't fall under the Classification radar or I could be fired."

With that explanation of his hopefully piercing the man's skull (he sounded intelligent enough), Government accessed his most recent recorded archives and played them back to the man, in the original voices... though the sound quality was very crackly, filled with white noise and more than a little faint. The rusty wall he was recording through was probably responsible for a lot of that.

"I... loo...ing for you! Me... you n-... to talk."

"I assume you... -ere to kill... offer your ass-... We can talk, but... the people here are... won't leave my partn-..."

"Oh, and keep this under wraps from any potential spies..." Gov. started communicating again in his normal 'voice', detecting a bountiful opportunity to do his real job even better, hopefully riling up the locals even more in the process; an evil in times like this, but nobody truly understood the Robot's predicament!

"...But there is most certainly a filthy Communist infiltrator in there as well. Listen to this."

Gov. accessed his archive again, audibly rewinding all of his tape to reach the voice of the supposed infiltrator.

"...The party wi-... the people, it only re-... -ance and... when...... -inks, comrade."

The playback clicked off abruptly.

"Blegh, my synthesiser is rusting just from playing that back. 'Party'. 'Comrade'. Without a hint of what you call 'Irony'! If that isn't a Pinko, I don't know what is!" Gov. declared, seeing it fit to clang one of his claws against his cylindrical chassis. He never wanted to do that, seemed like more of a habit absorbed from constant rewrites of his diplomacy subroutines.
Judging from the sounds that came afterwards, Gov. could tell that Stubby had foolishly gotten his gun out again. You can't negotiate if you have a gun out. You have to hide the gun! A cardinal rule of politics, that.

"Hmm, I s'pose you're right." Gov. heard the Guard say as he put his gun away. "I apologise. But I'm still watchin' these folks. 'Specially the one who just burst in all unceremonious-like."

As he was amplifying all of this sound, Gov.'s inner processes had reached another conclusion that prompted him to feel ashamed. The man who burst in, he had missed him! Didn't even know what he looked like. He could have been another pinko.
@Levythelevy

I should point out that Gov. is outside, so no-one inside should be able to see him.
@Orcus @Apollosarcher @ClocktowerEchos

Government just couldn't let his pre-programmed 'curiosity' stay under wraps for long. It had been only a few minutes of him standing guard outside the Radiation Roost and already he'd grown sick of looking at the street. It'd been a while and he was still not used to how much his beloved America had changed.

Everything was so... dusty, ruined, and unorganised. These were the nightmares of those pundits who conjured up images of Iraq during the Resource Wars, saying America would turn out like that. Evidently they were right. And even worse, apparently Communist infiltrators like the one he had witnessed could not only wander around freely but also spout their rhetoric in public. Gov. had in his memory banks a time when that man would be dragged off and thrown in jail for life like the vermin he is. Maybe then this nuclear war wouldn't have happened, he thought.

The robot's attention was shifted when the Communist wandered right past him with another man, evidently not acknowledging him at all, and entered the Radiation Roost. Gov. had his recorder on him the entire time, the rusty wall repair being thin enough to hear through it. Unfortunately, the soundwaves ended up getting polluted when he detected another man approach the bar, burst in and confront someone else inside. It sounded like there was going to be some kind of struggle. Gov. would have taken the opportunity to try running driving away again had it not been for the whole crowded street business.

But before the confrontation could escalate to violence, he heard the distinct sound of Stubby whipping one of his shotguns shut.

"Is there a problem, sirs?" Gov. heard his 'owner' say from inside the bar, combined with the sound of a stool screeching against the floor. Gov. knew that the guard towered over most people in the town, so whoever he was talking to was probably quite intimidated.

"If there's gonna be a lil'... altercation in 'ere," the Guard continued talking, "I'd suggest takin' it outside, away from me an' all the other ordinary folk jus' tryin' to enjoy their drinks."

Gov. took this opportunity to deploy his arm-mounted Plasma Pistol, making him combat-ready... or as combat-ready as he can get, anyway. Since the Communist had not noticed him when he walked in, Gov. could easily catch him by surprise if he tried to make a run for it. This felt just like old times.
For your interest: if anyone wants to control Stubby, or any other NPC I introduce, they can. As long as it makes sense.

EDIT: Changed my mind. I don't intend on holding on to NPCs, though. I've made that mistake in the past.
@Earnest Evans

The room in which the South of the Border Political Forum was being held had turned into a loud, shouty cacophony of opinions, and certainly not a reasoned and well-thought-out one. This was very fitting of the American populace, Government had analysed. From his record, they always tended to get all hysterical and irrational when something beyond their immediate knowledge as provided by the half-assed news media confronted them.

Government was parked in a corner towards the back of the room, having been dragged along with his latest owner, a local Security guard who everyone called 'Stubby Shotgun'. He was, ironically, a very tall African-American man with long hair, a big black beard and a preference for dual Sawn-Off Shotguns, so his name was only half ironic, Gov. had deduced. So far both he and the guard had remained quiet throughout the crowd's shouting, but it seemed like the residents of the town were itching to go at this Vault Dweller character with torches and pitchforks, as hysterical citizens are apt to do.

Gov. analysed the situation. He needed to leave town, that was for sure. The longer he stuck around redneck country, the more time was given for the Impostors that call themselves the 'Enclave' to overthrow the country's democratically-elected leaders! But evidently the superstitious locals wouldn't take kindly to robots wandering around on their own, which was why Gov. was relieved his latest captor-turned-owner was a bit more reasonable than most, though still stubborn to accept his authority. However, the situation might change if the locals were preoccupied with this Vault Dweller...

Gov. reached an internal concensus. He raised one of his metallic claws into the air and raised the volume on his crackly voice simulator, ready to rile up the crowd even more.

"I have heard rumours..." The cylindrical robot began, his voice reminiscent of a certain fast-talking miniature car salesman off the TV, "...That this 'Vault Dweller' individual has the ability to reprogram security robots by sneaking up on them and somehow magically turning them to his side, instantaneously, with no-one noticing! Not even the robot! As an official representative of the United States Federal Government who happens to be a Robot, I say this is unacceptable! Absolutely unacceptable! He could infiltrate the highest echelons of power and devastate the country even more than it already has been! He's probably a Communist! Would you want him running this country? I don't think so!"

As Gov. finished his speech, he analysed the reaction of the crowd. Unfortunately it didn't appear to have the intended effect at first, since everyone seemed to have gone silent and were now looking at him, confused.

"See?!" One of the locals, a woman, spoke up, her hysteria quite evident; thank God. "Even machines are afraid o' that there menace! What's the world comin' to when-"

"Wait jus' a minute!" A man interrupted her. "What was that about Federer Gub'mint?"

"Well, you see-" Gov. began to explain himself, his pre-programmed priorities taking over his artificial sense of judgement yet again. The locals would have to agree with him if they knew his authority! But then again, a lot of them were apparently idiots, so it was a long shot.

But before he could even start his usual explanations, Stubby Shotgun spoke up for the first time that day.

"Don't listen to the tin can. It's delusional. Still 'aven't figured out how to fix the damn thing." He said, rather nonchalantly, waving his hand. "Anyone in this room wants to have a go, be mah guest."

The rest of the room began murmuring to each other, first calmly with mentions of 'rampaging machines', but then soon enough someone evidently got them back on topic and they started screaming about the 'Vault Dweller' again. Everything was going according to plan...

-----------
Ten Minutes Later...
-----------


After Gov.'s bold assertion of his artificial intelligence, Stubby Shotgun decided to keep him even closer than usual once the Forum was over. He and Gov. had left the mass of screaming citizens early so Stubby could go and have a drink at the local bar, the so-called 'Radiation Roost'.

As they got close, Gov. analysed the area around him, and he couldn't help but record a rather suspicious-looking individual of Asian descent on the road, on a cart pulled by a Mutated animal. A Chinese fellow, from the looks of things. From his tone of voice and cart full of red, quite possibly a dirty Communist. It was a shame Gov. didn't see this fellow before, or maybe he brought him up to the angry mob. May as well set them against a target who actually deserved an angry mob set against them.

"Aghh..." He heard Stubby grunt to himself in annoyance. Turning his head a full 360 degrees around, Gov. saw why: a neon sign outside the bar reading 'No Robots Allowed'.

"Looks like you're gonna 'ave to stay put, Gub'mint." Stubby addressed him in that weird accent, tapping his finger against his chassis. "Y'all see any trouble, call me at once."

"Very well." Gov. replied, having no intention to abandon such a dangerous-looking fellow when he was still in action, in the middle of a crowded street, too.

"...But I am only assisting you out of a moral obligation to ensure the safety of American citizens. Not because you have any actual authority over me." Gov. continued, his artificial intelligence not really knowing what 'tact' means. Again, good thing Stubby was a calm man.

"Whatever... damn stupid machines..." Stubby mumbled to himself, this clearly not the first time he had to deal with Gov.'s mechanical honesty, as he entered the Radiation Roost, leaving the Robot standing guard by the door.
I'm waiting for a prime opportunity. I tend to do that when RPs start.
<Snipped quote by HHShetland>

Nope. It's just some fellow wearing armor.


I see. It was a little difficult to tell if he was speaking approvingly of the Vault Dweller or not.
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