Member
Dion
cider
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5 yrs ago
Current
I haven't updated this in over 7 years.
1
like
11 yrs ago
I'm so happy, found two orphan newborn kittens and was able to put them in with a nursing momma cat and she adopted them right away!
4
likes
11 yrs ago
Ladies, come help me defeat the men in the count down game in Spam. They're just asking for it.
11 yrs ago
Free used couch. Only has three legs and missing one cushion, stains minimal. Please pick up from the curb.
Bio
+18 only, I check IDs
Most Recent Posts
I've never used Skype. My computer hates it.
Blitzkrieg said
I had two 1v1s, one was balls deep in smut, the other would have headed there if I haven't lost intrest.
Blitzkrieg said
There were PMs?Aww shucks, I want to get on in the smut.
Any time, bby. Just bring you and your avatar.
That's some heavy drinking, who knew you'd become an temperamental interior designer when wasted.
How I ended up in the ER twice because of sexual activities gone awry.
1. Fooling around in the shower at a hotel and forgot to put down the bathmat. My husband was sitting on the ledge and goes to grab me, I slip and take a header into the opposite ledge, missing the faucet by an inch. End up with a chipped front tooth that has to be capped and a split lip, blood everywhere. This was in Denver, we were on vacation for our first anniversary and it was Labor Day weekend. No dentists were open and my husband was getting questioned by the cops while I was seeing the nurse in the ER. Everyone must have thought he beat me or something, it was pretty embarrassing having to explain to the nurse and the cops what really happened.
2. A few years later, having sex in a certain position with my husband, I'm not a dancer, nor a super flexible person, so when he does that I feel a twinge in my ribs. No big deal because it's feeling great lower down. Later that night I wake up with this sharp pain in my chest, I'm thinking 'holy shit a heart attack? wtf!' So he takes me to the ER and they run all kinds of tests, nothing. The doctor, who has like 4 interns with him, starts poking around and asks me if I had bent in an awkward position or picked up something heavy because it sounded like I had some pinched cartilage between my ribs. That's when I look him in the eye and tell him, "Yeah, my husband here had me bent like a pretzel earlier." The interns start tittering and making furious notes and the doctor I can tell is trying not to laugh. My husband's face was
And my face was red.
TL;DR It hurts so good.
1. Fooling around in the shower at a hotel and forgot to put down the bathmat. My husband was sitting on the ledge and goes to grab me, I slip and take a header into the opposite ledge, missing the faucet by an inch. End up with a chipped front tooth that has to be capped and a split lip, blood everywhere. This was in Denver, we were on vacation for our first anniversary and it was Labor Day weekend. No dentists were open and my husband was getting questioned by the cops while I was seeing the nurse in the ER. Everyone must have thought he beat me or something, it was pretty embarrassing having to explain to the nurse and the cops what really happened.
2. A few years later, having sex in a certain position with my husband, I'm not a dancer, nor a super flexible person, so when he does that I feel a twinge in my ribs. No big deal because it's feeling great lower down. Later that night I wake up with this sharp pain in my chest, I'm thinking 'holy shit a heart attack? wtf!' So he takes me to the ER and they run all kinds of tests, nothing. The doctor, who has like 4 interns with him, starts poking around and asks me if I had bent in an awkward position or picked up something heavy because it sounded like I had some pinched cartilage between my ribs. That's when I look him in the eye and tell him, "Yeah, my husband here had me bent like a pretzel earlier." The interns start tittering and making furious notes and the doctor I can tell is trying not to laugh. My husband's face was
And my face was red.
TL;DR It hurts so good.
Drakel said
You gotta slay my dragon first princess. ;)
I need to start making a list and schedule of these things.
Sometimes it's all in the details. I'll edit the ones I told in PM
I don't want to get in trouble >.>
mbl said
My fav so far is blitz taking his friend's barely-average, puke-covered sloppy seconds.You people are far too tame to handle stories of my sex life, but I'll share some alcohol nonsense. I was hanging out at a friend's family gathering. I'm still convinced there was something else going on, but I ended up smoking some chop and drinking maybe five beers and then blacking out for several hours. Apparently while I was in this memory lapse the cops showed up and nearly took me and some others to jail (I also said some 'funny' things to the cops if stories are correct). After this encounter with the cops I also managed to lose my wallet and keys (found them the next day) and pass out for a bit on a set of workout equipment. I now have a rep with said friend's family for drinking too much at family occasions, when as far as I remember I drank what would barely give me a buzz normally.
Most of my embarrassing stories deal with sexual situations. I didn't want to poison the minds of the kiddos in Spam.
Goldmarble said
No. Stop hoarding Gold....I don't like being hoarded!
I'll hoard you.
In
Harper Row hate/Cullen Row appreciation thread (possible spoilers for New 52 Bat-Titles)
→
12 yrs ago
Forum: Spam Forum
Imagine, the nerve to put something nerdy on an RP forum. Pfft.
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