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9 yrs ago
Current The respect one gives is a measure of oneself, not the other individual.
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Bio

Hey all, JB here.

I'm a DM for a large number of games here on RPG, as well as a player in several others. Many of the games I run are overly complex, or they involve Dungeons and Dragons (which is also overly complex!).

I work 40+ hours a week, and am the proud father of two tiny terrors named Chibi and Chibette and married to my beautiful Wifey. As such, I am quite busy more often than not. I typically write 2-5 paragraphs per reply and try to maintain an excellent level of grammar. If you noticed me glancing at your profile, I probably was looking to see if you would be a good match for my RPing style. Even if I didn't send a PM to you, feel free to send one back!

I enjoy 1x1 RPs and small groups. I'm fond of medieval, steampunk, and futuristic settings, and I'll jump into romance, adventure, and slice of life RPs fairly quickly, although supernatural (vampires, werewolves, etc) RPs get old for me pretty quickly. If you're looking for an RP partner and I've glanced at your profile, then I'm most likely willing to give it a shot, but decided against PMing you because I'm actually kinda shy. But I'm always looking for a new friend!

Please feel free to say hi at any time!

Name/Aliases: JB, JBRam, Jeebs
Gender: M
DOB: June 1988
Location: Maine (East Coast USA)
Hobbies: Ridiculously complex RP ideas involving lots of spreadsheets.

Most Recent Posts



So this is our reward? The gloom of the settlement mirrored the aggressively neutral glare from a human woman. Her clothing and hair style were as chaste as one would expect of a nun (at least, an armor-clad nun), and yet her demeanor was about as unwelcoming as it could be. We traveled towards civilization for how long, only to be greeted thus? Pathetic. Useless. Waste.

The woman produced a candle, setting it alight with a tindertwig and shedding light that provided insubstantial warmth to the woman's face, but the cold stare instantly snuffed out any feelings of compassion in her direction. This was not what she had expected. Where was the mirth? The merriment? Where were the happy faces of children playing with each other? Instead, they were greeted with gloom, depression, the chains of an oppressive fog lurking about, obscuring the town from view. Barred doors, such as she had encountered her whole life, were the main greeting established here. Not that she had expected a town would lay out a scarlet runner for her arrival, but she had hoped there was aught other than this: loneliness amongst despair.

Around her was a motley group of individuals that seemingly were as surprised as she was with this turn of events. Many seemed to have some semblance of power or training, certainly more than one would expect from a commoner, but none seemed as weathered as those she had known before. The teachings of the fey were not helpful yet in discerning their strengths or weaknesses, but if they were fated to travel together, time would reveal such information. Before them was a pair of children, seeming quite out of place in the murky atmosphere. The fog around them felt foreboding to Lydiane, and perhaps a bit sinister. "You there. Children. Should you be out and about in a time like this? Where are your homes?" Lydiane called, her voice stern and feeling almost abrasive against the chill silence of the area.


The lack of a green-hued individual sorely disappointed Katia. She was promised a Green Man, and instead got this brash, impatient, muscular absolute hunk of a man. She was not happy in the least. Of course, when life gives you eye candy, there is no reason to look away. She listened to the brief discussion that followed, her interest quickly waning. The hall was for heroes of Ysgard, despite them never having been to such a place. And so, while the not-green man jabbered on, Katia tried to find a good meditation spot.

The task was easier said than done. The hall was entirely artificial, and although it felt special, it was hard to gain that special something that she needed to clear her mind. She had just gotten settled on a reed mat before the fireplace when Birbin shouted about a passageway downstairs. Annoyed, she opened one eye and glared at the wizard, wondering how he could be so thick-headed as to suggest moving quickly after a taxing battle. To her dismay, not only did the Ysgardian follow, but also Cesar. Thankfully, Wick remained behind, as did Thea, Theodore, and Haemar. It was all the same to her. A rest was required, and a rest would be achieved. "Impatience..." she muttered before returning her mind to the crackling soliloquy of the hearth.

Her mind cleared, and she saw before her the verdant valley they had passed through from high above, as if she were soaring on the wings of the Really Big Crow. Beneath her was a hoard of soldiers darting amongst the trees. She focused her mind, harnessing the vision to show her what she was meant to see. The bird dipped low, and she gazed into the face of the nearest soldier. Instead of a man, it was an amalgum of pain and shadow, evilly twisted beyond recognition. Katia jumped, her eyes opening into the flaming hearth before her.

A glance up at Wick told her that all had remained normal in the hall for the previous several minutes, and Katia slowly got to her feet, still shaken from the vision. The mat was rolled up and placed in its spot in her pack, and she perused the hall for the first time. A shortbow and a quiver of arrows were drawn from the stores, should she have need of another long-range option, and she sat next to Wick, reaching out in silence to hold her hand. She had no idea if the vision were a product of her imagination, a deity's intervention, or some other force of nature, but in this place, this hell amongst the heavens, anything was possible.
Sigurx's Cave


The group held its ground and waited for the others to catch up, as it was obvious that the troll had noticed them. Once Detta caught up, she stopped about 30 feet from the troll, and after using Detect Evil, began to speak diplomatically. "Are you Sigurx? Pardon the sneak, but we were expectin' one a bit more violent. Now, I am against hurting anyone that don't deserve it, but some sod over at Fort Ramsgate wants yer head. Don't suppose you could tell us why?"

"I's a troll. If there ain't no bounty, then people don't know we exist," the troll replied with a shrug. "I's Sigurx, but you probably know that, assumin' ya can read."

Detta chuckled. "Took me a few years, but I got the hang of it." She puts a gauntleted fist on her hip. "Why do you dislike the goblins and not us? The hobgobs, right?"

>Detta rolls Diplomacy. Result: 17

The troll hoisted the giant club on its shoulder and eyed Detta for a moment with the one good eye. "Ya see this burn?" he asked, pointing to the massive scarring on his face. "That's why. Gobs been tormentin' me fer years. They only recently stopped."

A wince. "Years?" Detta said with a frown. "The bastards..."

>Detta rolls Sense Motive. Result: Natural 1. The troll seems incapable of lying. At least, not well. Kyra also rolls Sense Motive with a result of 20. She receives basically the same result - The troll does not seem very good at lying. He has a lot of anger and frustration at the hobgoblins, though, but also, oddly, a lot of fear towards them.

Detta shook her head. "Name's Detta. Turns out my friends and me 'ave a job for driving off some folks that carry the same banner as we jus' found in a hobgoblin cave not far. If you tell us everything you know 'bout them, I promise we'll give the bandy-legged shites what-for."

>Detta rolls Diplomacy. Result 22. Detta's annoyed that the hobgoblins would do this to anything, let alone a troll.

The troll snorted in anger, apparently recalling the abuse he had faced previously. "I've gots some info on them gobs, fer sure. They met up with some human shite. One of them two warring groups that have been playin' footsy over that tower for years. He had some lady with 'im, and she got the gobs to fight fer em. That's why they left, finally leaving poor ol' Sigurx alone. You take em out, and maybe I'll be grateful."

Tapping her chin, Detta hummed in thought. "How many hobgoblins went with the shite and the lady? And, oh, a few'll meet my axe at least, Sigurx. Doubtless."

"Eh... how many... Erm... More 'n you lot, fer sure. Numbers ain't my strong suit." The troll shrugged, almost apologetically. "If you saw that cave of theirs, then you can probably guess as good as I."

At this point, Kyra has left the bushes and stood by the Dwarf, bow still drawn but not taking aim. Valerio decided to make himself more presentable via fixing the tears of his clothes using a Mending spell.

Detta raised her hands. "Right, fair." She eyed the troll's club. And sniffed. "Have you got anymore facts about the humans they met?" Detta asked.

>Diplomacy again. Result: 12.

The troll gave a shrug. "That lady is craftier than she looks. Other 'n that, dunno much about em. Wasn't around long enough to have tea 'n crumpets, if ya know what I mean."

Valerio waltzed towards Detta after his clothes are properly mended, his hands raised as a peaceful gesture.

"Right, right," Detta put one foot forward and raised a finger. "One more question, then we go hunting and leave you alone. You like the taste o' squirrel, Sigurx?"

"Squirrel? Bit crunchy fer my taste. Lots of small bones. Will do in a pinch though. What of it?"

"Well..." Detta produced the squirrel Valerio handed her earlier. The lifeless dented thing dangled by the tail between her thumb and forefinger. "Fancy pants 'ere-" Detta jerked her head in Valerio's direction. "-is adamant that this not go to waste. But, well, we don't so much need it. Waste of food ain't nothing good. You want it?"

>Roll Diplomacy again. Good thing you got ranks in it. Result: 24.

Valerio protested with a timely "... Hey!"

"Quit whining Val, you said to offer it," Detta said.

The troll eyed the squirrel, then the paladin, then the squirrel again. He stepped forward and held his massive hand out to receive it. "Thanks, I guess," he said, still unsure of the gift. "Free food is free food, right?"

"Could have addressed me by my name, you know. My pants aren't that fancy..." Valerio said to Detta.

"They's pretty fancy," the troll muttered.

With that being said, Valerio clears his throat, before giving a big ol' diplomatic smile. "Why, thank you. I'd also like to say that your..." He notices the troll is wearing a stanky ol' loincloth. It's tattered, barely covering anything, and certainly not fancy. "... That loincloth of yours is quite exquisite, as well. Compliments your... sinuous muscles, and your... beautifully green skin! You look of a troll nobody wants to mess with!"

"Sure..." the troll replies hesitantly, looking down at his loincloth then back to Valerio, a somewhat confused expression on his face. "Ceptin maybe them gobs, I suppose."

Stifling a snort, Detta handed over the squirrel and answered the troll. "Call the food appreciation for your time, Sigurx. Now." Detta straightened and smiled. "I won't make you do promises, Sigurx, but if I hear about you causing any more bother for the pink-skins about this place..." She waggled a finger. "I'll be coming back to'ave a stern chat to you, alright? You been nice to us. Keep it that way for the good folks wanderin' the roads, if you please."

"Ah, yes, the hobgoblins. Right and proper shitesniffers, aren't they?" Valerio added.

"I's keeps to me own. Only bother those lookin' fer a fight. Too old ta go beatin' up on people, but that don't stop them from takin' shots." Sigurx sighed and turned back to Valerio. "Look, you been good to me. I ain't lookin' to sniff no one's shite, so what is it you want?"

"Good enough for me, friend." Satisfied, Detta nodded deeply and took a step back to wait.

Valerio, however, continued. "Like my friend Detta said, we're no friends with the hobgoblins. And I'm sure you'd want to get back at them, too, if you got the chance? We can arrange that, if you'd like, as a way to play on both our strengths."

>Roll Diplomacy. Result: 25.

Sigurx snorted, then stopped to think for a moment. "I's listenin..."

"As you can tell, we're small and puny, all the four or five of us. We won't be able to take 'em all on our own in an all-out assault, that's for sure, but we can sneak in and take out the bulk of their ranks, or at least a nice chunk of 'em. Sigurx, on the other hand, is big, and strong. You can smash their faces in like it's nothing! But of course, being big and strong and all also means you're pretty noticable... unless us small and punies can sneak in their fortress and prepare you a nice and proper entrance."

"Right..." The troll seems to be nodding, but is having trouble following the specifics of what Valerio is saying.

Valerio's smile almost faltered. Almost. "So here's what I'm suggesting. We sneak in and cut down their numbers some, perhaps even take out whatever it is that burned you, while you wait a good distance away, far enough so they won't see you, but close enough so that you can come in at any time. And then you just sit tight and wait for our signal. Once we call you in, you'll be in fine shape to come crashing in and smashing some hobgoblin skulls!"

>Roll Diplomacy. Result: 26.

Sigurx scratched his head, trying to wrap his brain about the whole proposal. "So... you's sayin' you want me to follow ya, then wait fer you to tell me to bash some squishies? Dunno how I's gonna hear your signal and not be seen, though. That tower sees a long ways."

"We'll make a smoke signal. Do you think you'll be able to see that by the treeline?"

Sigurx shrugged in response. "Might be. Somethin' loud might be better. Tower's usually burnin' somethin to stay warm or ta eat."

"I might have a spell to call you in... if not, then we'll make sure that the smoke will be distinct. In a pattern, if you will."

"Hrm... And how do I let ya know they's spotted me? Cause small and puny can be strong in many numbers. I ain't lookin' to be burned again."

"We may have a spell for that." Valerio mentioned, and started thinking to himself for a second. He looked back at his allies while he did so. "We'll most likely be on a rooftop or a balcony when we send the signal, so we will be able to see you from the treeline. If you don't think it is a right time to go in, then you can stay in the trees if you'd like. Otherwise, roar your loudest if you're planning on going in after we call."

"If you's plannin' to sneak in, you probably wants to do it at night. Gobs don't see so good at night, so you's be sneakin' easier. But if they see me, I's chargin' in the front door. Might give you lot a distraction at the least." Sigurx sighed and shook his head. "Guess it'll be one last glory run for ol' Sigurx. Give me a bit to grab my things, and we can go."

The brow furrowed an arched quizzically atop Kyra's face. She seemed genuinely impressed that these two had managed to convince the trog to potentially give its life to their mercenary's quest.

>The group has successfully recruited Sigurx. The party gains 1600 EXP.
Eilina hadn't known the tiefling long (barely even could remember her name... some sort of flower?), and so she largely stood awkwardly silent as the others mourned. The elven ranger pushed past in her grief, and Eilina did nothing to stop her. It was a cowardly thing to do: running away when faced with mortality, but the gnome had more important things on her mind. Soon after, Lex the Paladin stated that he would go upstairs and keep watch in case Ceria returned, and also left. The party was quickly dwindling.

It was only after the feline kurjian mentioned that they should move on that Eilina stepped past the crumpled body on the floor, not wanting to look at it. She hadn't the stomach for that sort of thing, and Yvah's short eulogy already had gotten her slightly teary-eyed. Instead, she sniffed and wiped away the tears that threatened to spill from her eyes, composing herself for the next room.


In the northeast corner of the tiny room was a tank with a young humanoid girl, barely taller than Eilina. The gnome wondered if the spell that the girl used to enhance her voice hurt her ears any, and winced in empathy. Next to that tank was a coffin, and another tank and coffin on the opposing wall. The tank opposite was empty, but still filled with the same liquids. Perhaps it was in preparation of another victim?

Worse, it seemed like they had reached a dead end. "I'm sure we're missing something," Eilina said quietly. "Maybe they hid a clue inside the coffins? I don't think we should open them until everyone is ready... and maybe after we save the poor girl."


Kiki smiled up at the bard who cradled her, glad someone cared for her well-being. The pain from the goblin's attacks subsided as her wounds magically closed, and she let out a quiet giggle as Ardiane kissed her forehead. "I think I like you best this way," she whispered before forcing herself back to her feet. "Should we keep moving?" she suggested.

Kiki stepped into the cave's opening once everyone had gathered. These goblins didn't seem very vigilant; perhaps they didn't expect anyone to interrupt them. The sound of running water echoed through the cave from the stream that flowed from its mouth. Kiki hoped the sound would cover their advance.

>Everyone who wishes to enter the cave, please roll Stealth with Advantage.
Sigurx's Cave


As the group began to prepare for its attack, the troll calmly put down the food it gnawed, grabbing instead what appeared to be the trunk of a tree. "Oi, there ain't enuff of ya to be gobs!" It called out loudly as it stood to its feet. "If you ain't be gobs, I got no quarrel with ya. Put down yer shiny bows and blades, or else you be squishies."

As Kyra got closer, she could see that in addition to the grotesque features of a normal troll's face, this troll also had severe burns covering half its face, and one eye was missing. All across its body were jagged blade slices crisscrossing, as if he had felt the gentle caress of a thousand cuts. The troll was old, perhaps bordering on elderly, and he was no stranger to battle.
Welcome back!


Once again, the battle was over almost before it began, leaving Katia feeling temporarily winded. This strange place took more from her than she desired to give, and although she remained uninjured, she had expended most of her energy in the batle. She spent a few seconds to collect and center herself again, trying to remember the lessons she was taught long ago. Would she ever see her family again? Would she ever walk those verdant paths, unburdened by the cares of the entire world? Or was she doomed to a life driving shades back from empty villages?

The answer she found in her brief meditation troubled her.

Katia shook off the doubt, instead choosing to approach the new face. "I wouldn't go that far," Katia spoke up in response to the man's praise of Birbin's magic. "We found the guy running for his life, and cleared out some of those pesky shadows that chased him. But he took us in for the night, so I suppose some measure of thanks is in order. You look less... Green than I expected." Katia's non-sequitur was abrupt as she leaned closer to investigate. "Valmjr of Ysgard, I am Katia Lei... of a location that now seems of little consequence. A rest in this Hall would be much appreciated, as would some further answers about this town. I hope you might know a bit more than your gnome friend could offer."


From Drajhan's astute observations and knowledge of social situations, it appeared evident that the man with two toes... er, fingers, was unlikely to assist at this time. "Perhaps another time, then?" the dragonborn offered as he approached the cave's entrance. The sights that greeted him were quite remarkable indeed, the likes of which he had never seen before. Of course, he could not let his ignorance show, and pointed out the bubbling pools of liquid to any who may have not seen them. "I would recommend avoiding stepping in those puddles, at least until we can identify the substance," he offered helpfully.

There was little more to do outside the cave. Drajhan's interests lay deeper within. And so, he stepped into the mouth of the cavern, keeping an eye out for anything out of the ordinary and trusting that tge good folk he traveled with would accompany him. Eventually. Preferably before he triggered some sort of magical explosion or whatever other nonsense was trending in these kinds of caves.
With little left to explore in these caves, the party continued on their journey, following the directions previously provided. Barely an hour had passed when a sign was posted on the road bearing crudely etched words in common:
NO GOBS.
GIT SKWISHT.
SIGURX.

Near the sign was another path leading away from the main trail. Among the many hobgoblin tracks that were easily discerned by the accomplished druid were several larger and fresher footprints, some of which were freshly made since the rains a few days previous. It was likely that they were still about a day's journey from the castle.
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