Melkor

The Band of Not-So-Heroes: A Superhero Comedy

@Cherrywitch I'm gonna have to withdraw. Not for lack of interest, but a lack of time, apologies.

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@SpookySquid I'm not sure what I'd respond to. We're not out of the ambulance and I'm not entirely sure where you're going with the cyanide.

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I did some of that postin'.

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V E N T U S

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Because of amazing timing and placement with a water jet, Ventus had just spotted the man he'd been looking for, Mrs. Pickles. If not for himself, then for public image, he should really change his hero name to something more appealing… Air condensed and propelled him toward the scuffle on the ground between the two men. But, as things turned out, he'd spotted them too late to prevent damage to Pickles. He could clearly see several broken bones and snapped limbs. The moment he was within range, Ventus compressed the air between the two and gently removed Pickles from the fight and harshly threw the man in red against a collapsed tree trunk. He heard the sharp crack as something broke.

“ARGH!” Red let out a agonizing howl of pain. Apparently something was broken. “Who the hell!-” he'd taken note of who his attacker was… he'd also taken note of the fact that it was just the two of them and that he had a broken bone from one, not, attack. He was outmatched.

“So, to be clear, your plan was to kill one of the Hero Association’s most newsworthy heros on the same day of his big promotion and get away with it? Frankly it's a bad plan… everyone would know that it was you. I mean it's not even dark yet!” Ventus gestured around them. As the smoke cleared more and more, sun rays began to break through the smog. “So, red, you'll be coming with me.”

“The hell I will-” the fact that he resisted was simply not relevant. Ventus had a grasp on him and he was escorting both of the combatants to the ambulances and the police vehicles.

Ventus had noticed movement, just a bit too slow, as the man in red and pulled an automatic pistol out of his biker leathers. He aimed it and let off several shots. His aim was poor and those that would have done some damage, just bounced off of Ventus’, now blackening, coat as though they were weak rock throws. His air barrier was still in place. Soon enough the Red character was in custody, no doubt he'd make bail.

In the meantime, Ventus had transported Pickles to one of the ambulances where the paramedics rushed to get his body stabilized, the got him onto a stretcher and began the rush to the hospital. Geoff had elected to ride in the back of the ambulance, just in case bikers showed up.

“The fact of the matter, Clearance, is that you stood your ground. It's not about winning or losing. It's about doing what is right…”

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@SpookySquid Yeah, I was gonna say that if he were to escape with minor burns then he'd have to put it out quickly.

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@SpookySquid My only issue is the alcohol burn thing xD An alcohol burn acts like a strong acid(like HCL). A strong acid will give up hydrogen and dehydrate your skin, causing it to burn. An alcohol burn [R-OH + 3(O2) → 2(CO2) + ౩(H2O)] (or something like that xD) will also have hydrogen left over from the initial carbon chain which will dehydrate your skin, though not on the same level of bad news.

EDIT: Otherwise I'm gonna start working on a post.

The Band of Not-So-Heroes: A Superhero Comedy

I'm gonna look at making a villain.

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Posted!

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V E N T U S

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“Do you think that the recent developments have set a precedent for future promotions within the H.A.?” The interview had progressed for about ten minutes by then.

“From my perspective; just because people don't understand reasons for things, it doesn't follow that those things are wrong. The way I see it, everyone is upset that a,” Geoff made air quotes, “‘Newbie’ has passed them in the rankings… some aren't upset or simply don't care. I fall into the second category. But ultimately, just because someone doesn't understand something, that doesn't make it false or incorrect.” The audience applauded his remarks with as much enthusiasm as they could muster - it seemed that the audience always did that.

“Alright, we're entering the last thirty minutes of our hour long interview with Dr. Burr, the S-Class hero, Ventus. We're going to take a short commercial break.” He turned to Ventus and asked, “Should we start talking about something else? You don't look like you're enjoying this topic.” His microphone had been cut, so to the viewers it looked like they were miming as the commercials started.

“It's your interview Harry, I'm here to answer your questions.” Geoff chuckled.

“Well, I've had it with these questions, we'll start a new topic when we come back.” With that he got up and made his way to the refreshment cart, near the stage, and began filling a cup of joe. There was a teleprompter stationed next to the main camera, out of shot, that displayed the time until they were live again. Less than two minutes to go.

Geoff didn't really do much for the last two minutes besides drink a glass of water. When the countdown had finally reached the last 20 seconds, everyone began taking their seats again as the crewman counted, “10… 9… 8… … 4… 3… 2… 1… and we're live.”

The camera panned over the audience then turned back to the stage. “And we're back with Dr. Burr.” Geoff nodded for him to continue. “We have some questions from the internet.” Harry picked up a tablet and tapped its screen a few times. “This one comes from our Reddit AMA thread; ‘Ventus, since you’re such a strident atheist, what would convince you of God’s existence? And why are you so adamant about breaking the idea down? Isn’t it like telling a child that Santa doesn’t exist?’” Harry put the tablet down and looked at Geoff, “What would convince you that God exists?”

Geoff couldn’t help but crack a bit of a smile, the idea of a God that controlled everything and created everything and listened to prayers was ridiculous to him. “It's almost impossible to use 'strident' and 'atheist' is separate sentences, they just go together." He chuckled. "Well… First off - which god are you talking about..?" Some applaud. "The thing is, I used to think that I would be convinced if the clouds parted...” He smirked more and the crowd laughed as he made grand gestures of the clouds parting, “... and a voice said something like, ‘I EXIST!’. But when I think about it… what would make more sense? That I’m actually hearing the voice of God in the clouds or that I’m hallucinating? I don’t think that anything but proper measurable and testable material evidence would convince me of any supernatural nonsense like that.” The crowd applauded, but there were a noticeable group who didn’t and positively looked angry that anyone would say something about their god in that way. “As far as the Santa thing goes… well… funny thing is - kids manage to grow out of Sant-” The skeptics in the crowd burst into laughter and applause.

The noise from the crowd masked the commotion of a man bursting into the studio, seemingly out of breath. “City X… park… fight… fire… Mrs. Pickles… gang… help…” The man collapsed, frazzled, as the crew rushed over to either try to throw him out or help him, Geoff couldn’t tell. But he stood up.

“Eh, Geoff, what are you doing..?” Harry seemed weary of the situational change.

“I’m going to City X, there’s apparently a fire in a park and Mrs. Pickles needs some help with a gang fight… weren’t you listening?” With that, an applauding crowd and a dumb-struck Harry, Geoff began levitating again and he shot out of the studio, quickly exiting through the door the man had taken to get in. City X… that’s not too far… Geoff began to launch himself toward City X, the wind causing his hair and his coat-tails to flip around wildly.

***

It only took a few minutes for him to arrive in City X and only a few seconds for him to spot the billowing towers of smoke rising from the North Park area. He knew his first priority would be to put out the flames before they spread. There were already emergency services arriving on the scene. A few fire-trucks and police vehicles. Geoff set himself to hover above the park and he could hear gunshots, he put a weak barrier around himself. It wouldn't’ deflect a shot but it would render it useless.

He focused on the base of one of the smoke pillars, where he knew there would be a raging fire, and removed the air from the area - starving the flames. He did this until they were all put out, then he began to zero-in on the fighting and tried to find Mrs. Pickles.

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Hahahaha Yeah, it's fun (and expensive) to use a planeswalker deck. Also, I'm working on my post for Ventus.