Hylozoist

Interplanetary Space Friends - A Game About Space Adventures, Friendship and Fast Food

I'm sure that's a completely unhelpful description, but I don't really quite know how to put it.

@Valor

Quite the opposite, it's very helpful! I think we'd benefit from that sort of scene personally, because it really can help cement what the characters are like ("What do they do when they're free to do whatever they want..." is a good way of understanding characters and what players like to do, perhaps even more so than asking "what do they do when they're forced to act by circumstances"). I'll let others weigh in on it as well, and I may have to step in during this scene to go "okay, folks, let's move along a little now" if it gets too slice of life.

I'm a little sad that we lost the Ship AI character, as that would've been a nice way to string together some "daily life aboard the Quest For Flavour" bits.

RPGC #13: Resolutions! - Voting and Discussion

34 Seconds

I like the setting and the way of counting down to everyone's new year's resolutions, really reminds me of wartales from World War Two. A very good and brief summary of events leading to this war-torn environment also helped feed the tone, and indeed did some of the survivor's resolutions allow the reader to relate. But really, that's where the reader-character connection ended.

With the way you ended your story with the threat of eliminating this quickly introduced team of characters, the pay-off of "Oh no they might die" was played down a lot due to this obvious lack of character development. With no prior knowledge to help me connect with the characters through sympathy or understanding, other than the suggested stereotypes and blindness of one soldier, the countdown and suspense of an oncoming bombardment were almost totally negated. Perhaps focusing on one character and telling their life story, or the relationships and stories of this whole group of characters, would've helped. But, again, without that emotional build-up, there's only a dry payoff.

But, as @Silver said, the tininess of these almost World War-like veterans does give a solemn tone to the short story. Your piece does have some great aspects, as said: The beginning description, the atmosphere, etc. But, again, what makes death the saddest is when you can see, personally, what had and could've been.

@Gutshot

I didn't know the community got to vote on it either, that will teach me for not reading the fine print. I realise that it might not be the done thing to leap to one's own defence when it comes to reviews, but your review touched upon one of those things I was actually quite nervous about just after hitting the send button.

Wait! Give me a second to explain! It's behind a hider so you don't need to read it if you don't fancy it!

The original version of the story was a fair bit longer, and I struggled with trying to create a character that was fully fleshed out without it going off the rails in terms of length. The more I wrote, the more I wanted to cut out, and I ended up feeling far happier with it as an exercise in telling as much as I could with as little as possible, going for evoking a feeling rather than trying to tell a complete story. I'd decided that there'd be no real pay-off in terms of plot (a nod to the bonus category of “…That was anticlimactic.”), no reason for the war given, and so every time I started writing more things about the characters and trying to establish who they were and flesh out why they were fighting, it watered down the sense of bleakness.

In one version, the soldiers survived. In another, the soldiers died. If they survived, it wouldn't feel so bleak and pointless. If they die, it wouldn't matter because there was no personal connection. Neither felt as satisfying, to me at least, as to end it before finding out their fate. Making a resolution is an act of hope, after all. The bleakness probably did suggest a Bad End for the soldiers, but who knows.

It was a gamble, and I'm still not one hundred percent sure whether or not it was the right way to go. I think it would've been a more engaging narrative if it had gone down a route where an emotional connection was made with a character. It just ended up being, broadly, not that sort of short story.

Pokemon Gijinka [Always Accepting!]

Go ahead. As awesome as a third pokemon would be at the moment Gredy would rather strengthen the pokemon that he has rather then pick up a third right away.

@Bright_Ops

No problem, I shall work on a Togepi to work alongside Seth. I'm positively giddy with excitement.

Project Crossover [Video Game Crossover RP]

I think all the squads are done posting now, aren't they? I need to know what happens next!

Pokemon Gijinka [Always Accepting!]

Just don't do what I've done and opt in for a Kill Ozma playthrough.

@Saltwater Thief

You absolute madman. I've never done it, I've just sheepishly watched other people suffer their way through the Hot & Cold sidequest-minigame-thing. I mostly end up replaying it because there's something about the setting and it harking back to the more fantasy elements of Final Fantasy that I really liked. And the music. And the characters. And the plot. And the fact my brother accidentally scratched up the CDs when I was younger, so for the longest time, we never got past the first disc, so playing through the start of the game reminds me of spending time with him on the sofa back home.

Interplanetary Space Friends - A Game About Space Adventures, Friendship and Fast Food

I'll give Vonny a bit of time to weigh in on the mission choice, direction and what-not, and then make a post to move things along. I've got to venture into the outside world this afternoon ("Can you deliver?" "Uhhh..." "Great! Thanks!"). Just so I'm not entirely surprised by whatever lunacy ends up happening, the plan is to help throw a party on Ofromia, right?

I would like to run a little bit of this-is-what-the-ship-is-like between Nurr-Slugg and Ofromia (or wherever it is you end up), but if people are desperately yearning to sink their teeth into some delicious ribs sort-of-structure, I'd be happy doing a post outlining the journey overall and throwing the action back to you just prior to landing on Ofromia. Either's fine, really, but I want to make sure things are progressing at a rate that people like. Hopefully, eventually, I'll have a much better handle on the pace that works best for the group.

It's a learning experience for us all!

Pokemon Gijinka [Always Accepting!]

I'd be happy to have a Togepi, but I also called dibs on the last Pokemon submission so if Bright wants you I'd give him the nod.

@Saltwater Thief

I'll wait to see whether @Bright_Ops calls dibs first, and if he opts to not, then I am afraid to say you might be stuck with me. I've only just hauled my behind out of bed, but I'll start putting pen to paper on a character submission in a bit. If my day magically goes to plan, it'll be up in about eight or nine hours, and then that'll be something a bit more concrete for @Bright_Ops to make a decision on.

PS- nice avy. My least favorite party member, but what a great game.

@Saltwater Thief

Maybe closer to nine hours, I might end up getting sucked back into an FF9 playthrough.

Daemon Days(Original Sci-Fi/Fantasy blend Roleplay)

This looks rather interesting - I like the just-into-the-future setting and the many possibilities of the Daemons. I'd like to register my interest, and hope that more folks flock to this check, it's a promising idea!

Interplanetary Space Friends - A Game About Space Adventures, Friendship and Fast Food

So i am imaging Octodad https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LTmONNEUXjI with cat features and an exo-suit. how of base is that?

@DracoLunaris

Hopefully not too far off base, although I also got a bit of a github's octocat vibe, but that might be more due to my enduring love of adorable mascots and the common species name "octocat".

Pokemon Gijinka [Always Accepting!]

Right. The tea has begun to kick in and coherent thoughts are actually happening.

Trainer players! Here are the things I'd give my left foot to play, would anyone want one of these? Due to not being allowed to send body parts via the postal system, a drawing of my left foot will have to suffice in lieu of the actual left foot.

In The Order That I Would Give My Left Foot To Play, From "Most Willing To Cut Foot Off" to "Still Want To Play But Not Quite So Willing To Permanently Maim Myself To Do So"
Togepi, because look at it. Just look at it.
Cleffa, because... okay, look, I'll be honest, there's going to be a theme here, and it's mostly stuff that makes me go "awww".
Marill, because it's blue, it's white and, together, we can use Water Gun to deal with those fire types.
Chansey, because eggs are good for you.
Pancham, because sometimes you just have to punch things, and I got super excited the first time I got one in Pokemon Y.