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Ezner was exhausted.

He was slumping along the stone streets of Rharne's Earth District, barely able to lift his feet from the ground. He hadn't had a good night's sleep since he'd been released from the safe house as a freeman. He thought sleep would come easy, it always came easy when he was a slave. But every night he was visited by terrors. He'd wake up in his house that was far too big, far too empty, drenched in sweat with a scream echoing back at him from the walls.

The house and his freedom, both gifts from Faith. But he was struggling to deal with both of them. Faith, in her extreme generosity, had given him a property fit for someone well above his station, and the station above that. And it was all... somehow... his? Ezner didn't know what to do with such a large property.

He had begun forming a habit, several habits.

Each morning, after he'd been woken by his own screams and sweat, he would get out of bed. He would remove his sheets, carrying them out of the open door of his bedroom. He'd walk down the hall, glad that the coldest trials of winter were gone, and the wooden floorboards weren't quite so biting. Ezner certainly didn't love the cold, doubly so when walking through this giant house naked. He'd walked past the other rooms to the only staircase, and down them he descended. He'd walked out through the common room, hung the sheets on a line in the back yard to dry, then returned to the common room to work out.

After that came a breakfast cooked in a kitchen far too big for him, at a table meant for at least eight and not one. At some point, Ezner would slam down his fork into his plate if only to break up the deafening silence. He cleaned his dishes, cleaned all the surfaces, then returned to his bedroom to get dressed. Once dressed, he was out the door to greet the rising sun.

He walked down the road of the Earth Quarter to his job. He had been given a job at a local smithy, not as an apprentice but an entry level position. Most of his duties involved shoveling coal and charcoal, as well as hauling heavy loads of raw copper, zinc, tin, and iron all through the workshop. It was a long, exhausting trial, and now as Ezner's feet carried him home through the dark evening, his body was on the verge of completely collapsing.

Still, it was better than having to fight and hurt others. It was an honest trial's labor and it helped to strengthen his body. Maybe he could get promoted to apprentice one trial, if he worked hard enough. It was still crisp out, but no longer cold. Ezner wrapped his cloak tighter around his shoulders as the wind shuddered past him. He just wanted to get home, eat some bread and cheese, bathe, and go to bed. And do it all again tomorrow.

Up ahead, he saw a light on someone's porch. People were beginning to spend the evenings outside as the weather improved. It wasn't for Ezner, but still, part of him liked to see people like this. They were happy. It was good that someone could be. He found himself wondering if he was unhappy as a slave. Less happy than he was now? He still wasn't even sure what happy meant.

He had very few good memories to his name. Being freed by Faith, the time his mother gave him an extra apple, meeting... His eyes nearly bulged out of their sockets and his tired feet stopped him dead in his tracks. He saw the raven hair, the pale skin, the deep cerulean eyes, reading by lantern light.

"Elisabeth?"
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It felt good to be off the boat and back in the city. Having just endured the longest journey of her young life, the mage just wanted to sit on her porch and read by lantern light. The crossing had been difficult, jammed on a ship full of people for so many trials but it was over. After arriving home, she quickly bathed, washed her hair, and slipped into a change of clothing. So much better. Part of her wanted to lay in front of the fireplace and slip off to dreamland like she used to, but she knew better now. Until she was in better control of her abilities, sleeping next to a fire wasn’t such a good idea.

Sitting on her porch with a meditation book, Elisabeth was distracted by the words on the page. She wasn’t paying any attention to the people passing by. It wasn’t until she heard her name being said that her sapphire eyes glanced up…and saw a ghost from her past.

“Ezner?!?

Dropping the book she held, she slowly stood up, as if somehow that would gain her a better look at the man whose face had haunted her thoughts for almost a cycle. The tears came immediately, her chest releasing a pain she had held for so long. Her legs were frozen in place, unsure what to say or do. He looked different, but she knew it to be him.

She had so many questions. Elisabeth always had questions…but this time, they could wait. Her legs swiftly covered the distance between them in a matter of trills, arms immediately wrapping around his neck as her face buried itself against his shoulder, holding him close as her voice struggled to convey…well…anything. “I thought you were dead…” It was the first and only thing that came to her mind to say because she had. In her heart, that is what she had felt for if it had been anything else, certainly, she would have had some sign.

Elisabeth knew words. Lots of words. Yet at that moment, she couldn’t think of anything to say.
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Ezner watched her stand as the world slowed down. He hadn't seen her for almost three seasons now. Not since the morning after they'd met. He barely knew anything about her, but she was his only friend in the world, the only friend he'd ever really had. He saw the look on her face, heard his name on her lips, and knew in the deepest parts of his chest that she hadn't forgotten about him. Just as he had been thinking about her constantly, every trial, she had been too. When they met, he had hoped that they would free him together.

Then time sped back up, and in a heartbeat, Elisabeth had thrown herself against him, arms around his neck, her face hidden to keep her tears private. His own arms wrapped around her tight, his hands flat against her back. And he held her firmly, absolutely needing her there and now. The world melted away around him. The scent of oranges and lavender filled his lungs. The scent that lingered in his memories whenever he had thought about her, but it was never quite the same as it was now.

He heard her whisper into his ear, and the face she had bore earlier made more sense. He didn't know how she'd come to that conclusion, but it cracked something within Ezner. And his own tears began to flow silently down his cheeks, falling into her perfumed hair, and he squeezed her just that much tighter. And he held her there, for as long as she needed, for as long as he needed. He was a free man now, and he could do whatever he wanted.

And all that he wanted in this world was to be in this moment with her forever.
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She felt his arms slide around her, remembering what it felt like to embrace him. There had only been one other time – at the Dey’s house – that she had been compelled to do so. His situation, from the start, had broken something inside of her. Elisabeth would be hard-pressed to name one other person that provoked such a strong emotional response within her. Having long thought about the matter, she finally alighted on one component of it – need. Elisabeth absolutely felt that he needed her. What that need was, wasn’t her place to say, but she felt it, and surprisingly enough, returned it. She needed him too and was much clearer on the reason why.

Ezner had known the truest form of the young woman. Having met just after she arrived in the city, he had befriended her, and even though her situation had paled in comparison to his, he had been like a rock, considering her thoughts and feelings. It had been, at that point, a new experience for her but what it translated into was, for her, stability. Of course, his disappearance had upended all that, and yet as she stood there with him, she felt relief that a foundation anchor of who she was now had safely returned.

Finally releasing him, she noticed his tears, streaking down his dirty face. Slender hands gently slipped to his cheeks, wiping away the tears that fell. Sapphire eyes took in everything about him, trying to gauge if she could note any clues as to what had happened in the three seasons since their last encounter. He had gained some sorely needed weight – that was obvious. Ezner looked much healthier, and that was a good thing.

Mustering up as much discipline as she could, a soft smile played about her lips, whispering gently. “I think, you have had an adventure that I need to hear about.” Tangling her fingers through his, she gently led him back to the porch, picking up the dropped book and setting it aside while she retook her seat. Taking a deep breath, she let her eyes search his, curious about what story he was about to tell her.
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She let go of him, stepping back, her deep blue eyes staring at him, studying him, as they had done those two trials they'd spent together. She was always watching him, searching him, looking for something. But he never knew as to what. It was different under her eyes as compared to the eyes of potential buyers. He had been sold several times and had grown immune to being under their gazes, where they sought reasons to drive down his price, injuries, scars, deformity. But now, her eyes were seeking reasons to help him, seeking things to make right, things to heal. Just as she had helped to fix his hands when they first met, just as she had seen him being underfed and demanded change, just as she had seen his rags and worked to get him better clothes.

Under her gaze, he felt safe and cared for, and a soft smile answered hers in return. He felt her fingers find his and allowed her to pull him up onto the porch, happy to follow. He still couldn't believe his luck. He'd walked by the house she'd let him stay the night in, but he never saw her. It was often empty, no glow of candles or fire in the windows. He had assumed that she had left.

Guilt was on his face now.

He hadn't ever given it dedicated thought, but now that she was back here, part of him had thought she had left him behind. It was there, just under the surface, disturbing his sleep, adding to his pains of adjusting to his new freedom. He'd always thought she'd be there, that she would've been a part of it. But she wasn't. She wasn't at her home. Ezner had approached the Institute, having asked someone where it was. He had spoken to a couple of people, but they either didn't know her or said they hadn't seen her in a long time. And he had left, saddened.

It was only now that she was back that he realised that he'd been feeling that way. And so, when he sat in the chair across from her, his shoulders were slumped and his eyes couldn't find hers as he stared at his hands, slipping deeper into his guilt. He began to speak, his voice strained, starting to crack.

"It wasn't much of an adventure. A few trials after..." he took a deep breath, "After we last saw each other, I was at the Order of Adunih. I had some pretty extensive injuries after a fight at the Pit. The healers there patched me up. When I woke up the next trial, I found myself face to face with Faith Augustin. She had Mr. Dey, and others arrested, for abuse of slaves. For abusing me. She bought me. I... I was kept in a safe house while Mr. Dey and the others were taken and tried in court. Afterwards... I was a freeman."

But what should've been a happy story, what he thought was going to be happy. The story he had practiced and rehearsed over and over in his excitement to see her again, had crumbled as he broke down completely. His dirty face fell into his even dirtier hands as he sobbed openly. He couldn't say another word. He didn't know how to tell her about the loneliness of his freedom, about the pain he felt walking past her old house, about telling people at his job that he was a freeman before he could tell her. He didn't know how to tell her how his new house terrified him with how big it was. And he didn't know how to tell her that he had wished for and hoped that she would've been there waiting for him.

And he didn't know how to tell her how heart broken he was that he had never found her.

All he could do was sob.
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Squeezing his hand softly, Elisabeth sat there and listened to his story. Even before the words came out, she knew there would be trouble. Pain was evident on his face, but she didn’t know why that would be. They were together again – wasn’t that a good thing?

He got the words out…somehow. Ezner was free, she couldn’t believe it! It was only trills before he completely broke down in front of her. Elisabeth moved quickly, instinctively. There was no thought – just movement. Slipping between his legs on the step below the one he sat on – the position ensuring he looked at her and only her – Elisabeth gently took his face in her hands, head softly pressed against his forehead. He needed to feel her there, the weight of her presence. The young woman let him sob, knowing the healing power of such things. He needed to acknowledge what he was feeling but she wasn’t going to let it go on for long. She was done with tears where he was concerned. He was there. He was free….and she was going to help with whatever he needed help with. Speaking softly, she gently caressed his face.

“Ezner, I’m here. I’m not going anywhere. I was out of the city for a bit but I’m back now. You found me. You. You walked past my new house, that you didn’t even know I had, and found me. The time for sad tears is over. You have your entire life in front of you now and I’m here to help with whatever is making you feel this way. We can talk and work out everything. I can’t promise I will understand sometimes, but I will always do whatever I can you make sure there are no more sad tears.”

Looking up at him with concerned sapphire eyes, she again began wiping the tears away, hoping that something, anything that she said found its way to him. “Just tell me…one word at a time. Whatever comes to your mind first. What hurts you?” It was going to be a slow process and she had no idea if she possessed the right skills to help him navigate the minefield he was facing…but she cared and sometimes that was enough to effect change.
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He felt her hands slip into his, clasping at his cheeks, and pulling him up to look at her. She would see a shade of the same man who couldn't be what he wished to be three seasons ago. That man had been broken by unfettered freedom coupled with complete and utter solitude. When he'd been a slave, he was not human, he wasn't concerned with things like loneliness, boredom, thinking, emotions.

But Elisabeth had... undone all of that. She had shown him how to think. How to feel. And then she was gone. He was gone. He heard her words as his sobs slowed, comforted by the touch of the only person who had ever offered him a kind touch. He always listened, no matter what he was doing. He never missed a word, especially from her. He cherished the words she spoke.

He sputtered out the words, an absolute mess of a man who knew no shame, for such things had never been taught to him. Pure, raw emotion exuded out, "I was alone." It was as much an admission of himself. He knew he hadn't connected with anyone since his freedom was granted to him. He hadn't even bothered to try. He didn't want to, for there was only one he wanted to reconnect with. One person he wanted to tell. And she was holding his face now.

He still felt and carried the guilt of internally blaming her for not being there, but with that came old habits too. It was obviously different, spoken in the same manner that Elisabeth would've heard him speak to Mr. Dey. "I'm sorry. I disappeared."

His posture shrunk a bit more, trying to hide more within himself from the source of his pain. He remembered every word she'd ever said to him, and a few began to echo in his skull, in her own voice.

"Where else would I be? I said I would see you through this and I will. I don’t turn my back on people."

"I don’t walk away from friends."

"You and me. Together. You aren’t alone anymore."


In a bare whisper, "I was alone..."
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Sighing softly as he spoke the words he needed to, Elisabeth understood. She understood. For so many arcs, she had felt alone…but it had been by choice. How would she feel now if everyone she knew and cared for was taken away?

Alone.

Taking her hands away from his face, she did the one thing that the young mage knew she needed to. Ezner had been feeling alone – and he needed to know he wasn’t anymore. Slipping her arms gently around his torso, she settled her head against his body, just holding him, closing her eyes, and listening for his heartbeat. She didn’t speak for a few bits, letting her presence ground him. He needed that, more than he needed words.

After a few bits, she finally allowed her gentle voice to reach out to him. There were things he needed to know.

“Before I left, I went back to that little stairway behind the Marketplace. I talked to you…and I left the blanket you had the night you stayed at my house. I felt like I needed to tell you things, like how I wanted to help you and that I was sorry I couldn’t. I felt like I let you down. But I promised you and myself that I would help someone else. I told you that you were my first friend and that I would never forget you…and I never did. I told you that you changed my life and that the two trials we spent together were special. You had no reason to trust me and yet you did. You allowed me to start trusting people. There are a lot of things I wouldn’t have now, if not for you and those two trials.”

Gently raising her head, letting her sapphire gaze find his eyes, Elisabeth told him the last thing she had said. “And I told you that I missed you. And I did. You are not alone anymore. I’m here. Whatever is hurting you, we will figure it out. I promise.”

She simply held him, waiting to see what his reaction would be to what she said.
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Ezner watched as she started to lean into him. He almost wanted to pull away, afraid of more pain to come. He didn't want to hurt anymore. But her arms were around him before he could, her head against his chest. And unconsciously, his arms wrapped gently around her head, cradling her there.

Thump-thump thump-thump thump-thump.

His heart was racing. And the tears kept flowing. But for each passing bit that she held him, his heart beat slowed, his breathing slowed, his tears slowed. And he began to hold her tighter, seeking more of her comfort.

Thump-thump.

Thump-thump.

Thump-thump.

He listened to her words as he held, and she held him, there. She... she truly thought him dead. She hadn't left him alone. He'd left her. He'd been taken away. He hadn't ever said his name while at the Order. Part of him thought maybe it was to protect her, protect her from Mr. Dey and his lecherous intentions. But no, that was surface level. He hadn't shared her name with anyone else because he liked that he was special to her and... she was special to him. In a time when he had nothing, for the first time in his life, he'd allowed himself to be selfish, and he kept her name, her memory, all to himself.

And that selfishness had been eating at him all this time and he had no idea.

When her eyes, her beautiful, crystalline blue eyes found his, he knew how much his loss had hurt her. He knew that he wasn't alone in this pain, that he wasn't the only one lost and confused. And in this moment, he pledged both a silent oath to himself, and one said aloud to her. He wiped the tears from his earthen eyes, his gaze taking on a determined, steely gaze, "I promise I will never be lost from you again."

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Elisabeth did not realize she was holding her breath. Not unit she felt his arms slowly embrace her. Then, and only then, could she finally release the tension built up inside. It was then she knew that yes, it was still the Ezner she knew…and he was fully present with her. That he remembered their connection and was a willing participant.

He remembered.

His heartbeat slowed and soon, things settled. For her part, she was afraid of saying anything that might upset him further, but she knew there were more questions to ask. A balancing act for sure.

It was then he made a promise to her to never be lost from her again. She understood the words but needed to know what they meant to him. Sometimes things could have different meanings for different people. What did the promise mean in Ezner’s soul? Promises were a funny thing. Balthazar did not like promises and generally disliked the times in the past that she had made them to him. Something about them not being worth very much when forces greater than one’s self were at play. The young woman had taken them to mean that despite that, one would do everything in their power to keep them. Elisabeth had tried to argue the point a few times but had finally given up. Still, she made promises to other people in her heart, even if they did not want to hear them out loud.

“Ezner, tell me what that promise means to you…so I understand? Please...” The question was posed softly, inquisitive sapphire gaze rising to meet his as she leaned back a bit, letting her head lift from his chest. While her arms no longer wrapped around him, her hands found their way to him, tangling fingers with his. Despite his newly found calm disposition, he still needed to know she was there. Touch was the best way, so she fostered the physical connection best she could as she waited to hear what he had to say.
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Ezner let his fingers savor the feel of hers entwined with his own.

Ezner heard her question, and he had to think about it, he truly did. For when he had given the promise, it had come from instinct, come from a place deep within him. He'd never given a promise before, not to anyone. He had been a slave, he wasn't allowed to make promises, both by former owners, but also by his own self. After all, what use was empty words? A slave was only as good as their utility allowed. Fanciful things like hollow promises were just not something that ever registered.

But when Elisabeth had told him about the words she'd spoken, spoken to him, thinking he was dead and gone, he had truly felt something for the first time in his life. He felt as though he had value to someone. Someone wanted him to be around, not for his ability to fight, or the ability to peel potatoes, or run errands or clean the house. Someone wanted him around just to be around. No, not just someone. Elisabeth wanted him to be around.

In her soft eyes, in her caring touch, he was a man she truly valued and cared about. To her, he was a person, and always had been. And so, when he spoke, he did so while looking directly at her. And for the first time in his life, he felt like a person speaking to another person, and soft smile adorned his face, slightly curled more on the left than the right.

"I need you in my life."

Then he gave her fingers a soft squeeze, letting her know that he was here and knew she was too, offering comfort to her as she did to him. He thought back to when they had first met, and she asked him who he wanted to be.

"I am a man who can see the world through his own eyes. And I want to do that with you."

He then pulled her fingers from his, gently upturning her palm and placing it on his. He glanced at her, then gestured with his gaze down at their hands. And using a finger, one letter at a time, he spelled out Elizabeth into her palm.
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Elisabeth knew she had asked a difficult question. If the answer hadn’t been important, she wouldn’t have. But never in a million arcs would she have expected the answer that he gave her. Nor would she have expected him to look her directly in the eyes when he told her…with a smile.

And that was when he dropped the bombshell on her. It was truth to him but to her, she really didn’t know what to make of it. He needed her. Need. It was something that every person had to determine for themselves – what they needed in their life. Ezner had decided that she was an essential need and spoke it plain, simple, and straightforward. No one had ever told her that they needed her. Ever. No one needed her. Maybe...maybe... wanted her…but need was a very different thing.

Squeezing his fingers back softly, the young woman smiled at him, finding the words she was looking for. “Ezner, I’m your friend. I will always be here. Now that you are free, we can do all the things you want. I told you that sometrail, you would see the world through your own eyes and now you have that chance. I would consider it an honor to be with you when you see things for yourself.”

The movement of his hands caused her to look down, watching as he spelled out her name – almost – in her palm. Breaking into a wide smile, her slender hand gently took his finger and traced out the letters again in her hand, but instead this time, drawing an ‘s’ instead of a ‘z’. “EliSabeth. It’s an ‘s’. It’s ok though, the two letters sometimes sound the same and there is a version of my name that uses a ‘z’. Arguably, it’s more common than the way my version is spelled.”

Rising, Elisabeth kept hold of one of his hands, giving it a soft tug. “It’s cold out here. Would you like to come inside? I was about ready to make dinner. No doing my dishes, alright?” A soft grin accompanied the comment, recalling what she had told him the first time he visited her house.
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In soft words, "I'm your friend too."

His eyes narrowed as he paid extra close attention as she respelled her name using his finger. S. Had it been earlier while locked up in the safehouse, under the tutor's expectant gaze, Ezner might've felt self-conscious and frustrated at having spelled her name wrong. But now, he just broke into the widest grin, broad and toothy. He knew how to spell her name now.

Then she was up, and bringing him with her, inviting him into her house. Before, he had looked around, knowing the sort of things people might say or think about Elisabeth if they'd seen her bringing a slave into her home. But now, he simply stood, nodding his head, "I would like that very much." He was still grinning about her dishes comment, understanding the joke now that had to be explained to him last time, at her last house.

And that was when Ezner remembered that he had a house too.

One that was much larger and more grand than her own as she led him through the door. One that reminded him more of the house he'd lived in as a slave to Mr. Dey than the cozy lived in home that Elisabeth had first brought him into. Stepping across the threshold, his eyes fell upon the couch she had offered to him to sleep upon. And there upon it, two blankets. He stopped there, just inside the door way, his memories from way back then rushing forth.

It really had been so long since they'd last seen each other. And he was a different man for sure. And she seemed different too, though he wasn't sure how. They hadn't gotten to know much of each other, at least in salient details, but they had reached out for each other in another way. They were both what the other had needed at the time. And the look upon Ezner's face was a mix of a man remembering both an old lover and a painful past as he stared at that couch.

After a long moment, he closed the door, only now seeing how dirty his hands were from work. Everything about him was dirty. He normally bathed himself immediately after work. "Can I help you with dinner?" He said, seeking permission, and then once more, "Can I clean up myself? I don't want to make a mess in your house." There was a bit of an intonation change in both of those questions. The automatic reply of a slave asking permission to do anything that wasn't explicitly told to him.
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Elisabeth watched his reaction carefully as she showed him the ‘s’, noting the broad smile on his face at knowing how to spell her name. Giving his arm a gentle squeeze, they went inside. Her new house wasn’t very different than the old one. Spartan with possession, there were a few books strewn around in different places, but it was obvious she didn’t view it as a place that needed to be decorated. It served a utilitarian function, allowing her a place to keep things. It was a place to sleep and escape anything that needed escaping as well…but a place like that didn’t need ornamentation or things for that purpose.

The couch, however, was the same one he remembered. Vin and Rilith had given it to her when she moved out. There was nothing special about it really. It was a simple, comfortable couch…but it was one that had given her endless nights of comfort from the realities of life. Maybe she was sentimental after all.

It was only when they stepped into the house did, she notice how dirty he was. Of course, he was on his way home from a job. At least that is what she presumed. Thinking quickly, she spoke. “Well, we could do a few things. I don’t have any clean clothes that would fit you…otherwise, I would let you clean up here. If you have clean clothes someplace else, you could go grab them and bring them back…or I could go with you?” The last option was borne of the fact that she didn’t think he would willingly let her out of his sight right then…and she was a bit curious as to where he was living.“If you don’t like either of those options, you are welcome to clean up the best you can here without a clothing change. I don’t mind, really” The smile she gave him reinforced that Elisabeth was truly fine with anything he chose to do.

Dinner could wait for a bit. She wanted Ezner to be comfortable so whatever that took, Elisabeth was willing. It was a conversation of two equals, discussing the course of the evening...and that felt really good.
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Ezner listened carefully as Elizabeth spoke, feeling a tightening in his chest begin to creep over him. He was being presented with a bunch of different choices. He definitely didn't wish to get her house dirty with all the charcoal and soot upon his person. He knew how messy his tub became every trial after her bathed. He wasn't about to inflict that upon her or her home. It was one thing for him to clean his tub spotless constantly, but here? Hers? He wouldn't do that.

And he only had clothes at his house.

He'd just gotten her back and he didn't want to leave her yet. He only was now realising that this conflict of choices was his own fault. He'd asked to clean up. Should he not have? None of the answers made perfect sense to him. Especially because he didn't want to take her to his house. He didn't want her to feel like he did inside of it. It was too big, it creaked a lot, it felt as though he were inside the corpse of a long dead beast.

And it was lonely.

But maybe it would be okay if she came with? He didn't feel lonely with her. He lightly chewed on the inside of his lower lip as he considered the options. His eyes were unfocused as he was thinking, his hands clenching and unclenching. Then he took in a deep breath, finding the comfort of her eyes once more. "I'll go get cleaned up and changed. I would like it if you came with me. My... house isn't far from here. It shouldn't be too long."

Ezner turned back to the front door, opening it for them both, stepping through first. It was a habit he had formed while serving as Mr. Dey's bodyguard. Always enter the unknown first. Back into the chilly air sent a shiver through him. He bundled up his cloak even tighter, slipping his hands deep into his pockets in the hopes of warming them a bit. His face showed his displeasure at this chilly evening air, particularly as the winds began to whip past him.

"It's not far. Three streets down, two streets over. Near to the Order of Adunih."

He descended the steps of her porch, waiting at the bottom, a soft smile on his face as he looked up at her, the moonlight catching off his eyes a bit, as he slipped a hand from his pocket, extending out in offer to her.
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Avalaon

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She thought for a moment that perhaps she had given him too many choices, but the issue with that was that life didn’t care about things such as that. Ezner was free now and he would have to figure out how to make decisions on his own or ask for help. Elisabeth stood there, gently watching him as he struggled through the thought processes that accompanied such.

It took him a minute to decide that he wanted to clean up and change at his house, but that he wanted her to accompany him. In her mind, it had been the logical choice, but the choice hadn’t been hers to make. Nodding softly, she gently walked past him to grab her cloak and scarf, laying a hand on his arm. “Dinner can wait a bit. This is more important…and I’ll be with you.” Elisabeth was wary of pushing anything with him for the time being. Unaware of just what the emotional and mental toll of his experiences were, it just wasn’t wise to move too quickly in any one direction. Stability. He needed stability.

Old habit die hard, and as he stepped out her door in front of her, she almost wanted to stop him from the involuntary act of leading her out…but she stopped at the last minute. It was actually…nice? Elisabeth was aware that what he was doing was something that had been trained into him and she felt guilty about enjoying how that one small act made her feel. He was protecting her…and that was something she wasn’t used to. It made her feel like she mattered.

But then, the surprise came. His hand held out to her with a smile, to help her down the steps. Without any hesitation, she accepted, squeezing the proffered hand gently as she made her way down to the ground, speaking softly. “It’s a nice night for a walk, I think. I wish I had returned before the snow melted. I would have loved to take a walk in the snow with you.”
Hidden 3 yrs ago Post by Benedict
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Benedict

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He gently guided her down the steps, his hand slipping free to slide back into the warmth of his own pocket. He didn't like wearing gloves, they were itchy and they made his hands sweaty. But mostly he didn't like how tightly they seemed to fit. Most of his slavery he'd always worn loose or ill-fitting clothing, and he'd grown used to it. Tight clothes made him feel even more confined. And reminded him of the trials he'd had to wear collars or chains, for those were the only things that slave owners made sure were tight.

Ezner's other hand unconsciously left his pocket, rubbing at the tattoo on his neck.

Ezner nodded at her words, his face somber, his hands working to tighten up his collar before diving back into their warm abodes. He began walking along the road toward his house, the same road he took every single trial. "I don't like the cold. I want to like it. I know you do. The way you spoke of it in Viden is nice. But it just hurts. It feels like iron against my skin." Iron chains.

He walked slowly, enjoying just being in her presence, "I got to see the snow from the safehouse I was kept in. It reminded me of you." But he hadn't been allowed to go outside in the snow, nor open windows. He'd been told it wasn't safe. Mr. Dey had dangerous connections. Ezner walked a bit in silence, "It would've been nice," in reference to her desire to have come back in winter. It wasn't said with malice or blame, a simple agreement with her words.

"Did it snow where you went?"

Hidden 3 yrs ago Post by Avalaon
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Avalaon

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When he went to release her hand, Ezner would find Elisabeth squeezing a bit tighter, keeping hold of his hand for a few trills more before allowing him to have it back. If pressed, she wouldn’t be able to say why but she suspected it simply had to do with wanting to make sure he was really there.

She noted him rubbing the tattoo – a nervous tick she remembered he had before. Why was he nervous? Nope. No more secrets. Elisabeth had spent a season with mysteries, secrets and enigmas. Gently grabbing his hand as he moved it back to his pocket, she stopped in the middle of the street, forcing him to stop and turn to regard her. Her eyes were always kind, but now he would see a bit of confusion swirling within them. “Why are you nervous? It’s just me, Ezner. You rub your tattoo when you are nervous, and you just did it. I’m no threat to you.”

When that matter settled, she allowed them to move on as he voiced his dislike of the cold. The way he described it, how it hurt him, pinched her a little. Elisabeth knew there were people that would never like cold and it was possible he would be one of them. She would have to learn to accept that. Nodding her head gently, she didn’t say anything, just letting him talk.

What followed was something of a contradiction. He didn’t like the cold, but the snow reminded him of her…and he wished she had been able to talk a walk with him in the snow. The young woman didn’t know what to make of any of it. Luckily, he asked a question that she could answer. “Yes. I left for Viden first and it always is cold and snowy there. Very far north. Then I went to Scavloris and was there through Cylus. Very cold. Very dark. Very snowy. I seem to thrive in that type of environment.” It was a fact she couldn’t deny, no matter how much sometimes she wanted to.
Hidden 3 yrs ago Post by Benedict
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Benedict

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He paused, his hand held by hers now. He turned to look, seeing the confusion in her eyes, and his own grew to match. Then a bit of hurt hid in his own and he wore it plainly. He mumbled softly, "I know you're not a threat."

'You're one of the only good things that has ever happened to me.'

He then clasped her hand that held his, looking her directly in the eyes. He didn't try to mask his pain, at both her thinking that he thought her to be a threat to him, as well as what made him nervous. He lifted her hand up to his shoulder, then pressed her fingers gently against the back of his neck, in the safety of the hood of his cloak, allowing them to touch the flesh where his tattoo was. He left her hand rest there, as his eyes slowly filled with tears but he didn't speak, he just looked at her.

After several long moments, "I wanted to keep holding your hand."

With his other hand, he wiped away his tears as he could no longer see her eyes through them. So he shared with her exactly how he was thinking. "But it's cold here. It feels like..." he gulped, "Metal against my skin. Cold, hard, painful metal." He rolled up one of his sleeves, holding up his wrist so she could see. The scars were faded but it was obvious he had worn chains there. "And it made me think of gloves I have. I don't like them either. They are tight. Too tight."

Then he clasped her other hand between both of his, letting his sleeve fall back down. "I like holding your hand. It feels what I think snow feels like. Cold, yes, but soft, gentle, close. Not painful, not like metal. Not like chains."

He took a deep breath, "I saw some children playing with the snow, and they were so happy. Watching that made me smile."

Then a nervous smile, "You're snow. And I want to hold your hand. But mine gets cold, and I don't want to wear gloves."

He'd heard her words about Viden, Scalvoris. One a place she wanted to take him one trial, the other a place he'd come from. It made him think of his mother, hopefully happy and free there. "You thrive on a couch with a blanket too. Cold isn't everything."
Hidden 3 yrs ago Post by Avalaon
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Avalaon

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Elisabeth didn’t waste a second. A soon as she realized what he was doing with her hand, she acted. Gently, she slipped both hands up around his neck, softly covering his tattoo, letting the warmth of her hands seep into his skin. Her forehead gently leaned against his, words warm and soft. “Ezner, that thing has no power over you anymore. None. It may still be there, but its power is gone. That will never be you ever again.”

His confession about wanting to hold her hand wasn’t expected but didn’t bother her in the least. They were both still a bit raw about assuming the worst had happened to the other so the idea that he wanted to keep a physical connection made sense. The only issue…is that he had refused to communicate that to her in the moment. “Then tell me that. I can’t know what you are thinking.”

He continued to convey how he felt. When he showed her his wrist, she removed his hands from his neck and moved them directly to this wrist, repeating the same act – simply allowing her touch and warmth to seep in. She was no healer, and her touch wasn’t magical…but Elisabeth knew the power of touch itself and hoped beyond hope that it would have a positive effect on him.

Ezner took her hand again and said he liked holding her hand. He had attached her to snow, but not cold. Interesting. Squeezing his hand gently, Elisabeth interjected a few thoughts of her own. “Snow is cold, yet soft and playful. I will show you sometrial – I promise. I won’t let it hurt you. I want you only to have happy thoughts of snow.”

The most surprising comment, however, was his observation about her on a couch and blanket. Curious. She wanted to ask him more about that but Elisabeth also wanted to get to his house so they could pick up his things and get back to her home. Squeezing his hand again, she nodded her head down the road, smiling. “Then hold my hand and we will get through the cold…together.”
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