Dervish — Roleplayer Guild

So this was the fairy Lethe. Like most of her kind, she was physically unimposing and spoke in a high, shrill voice of a creature that was trying to call out to an existence far above its own; namely every other sentient creature in Hyrule. Out of curiosity more than driven, Maryev had dutifully followed the fairy to the Shadow Temple, the foul construction leaving less than positive impression on the Darknut, which surprised him; there wasn’t anything to the rumours about the old dusty tomb, were there? It was a tale to keep children from desicrating the graveyard with their feces smattered feet and hands and inability to pay heed to the dead, who had accomplished more in that simple act than children ever had in their short, miserable lives. He chose to ignore the feeling, as well as the others gathered around. He had said his peace, and while he took note and interest in the fact that one of his kinsmen was here, a rarity he had never expected to see in some time, he also knew that any Darknut who walked these lands had been exiled for one reason or another. None would willingly walk the lands of their enemies, not without an army at their backs. The real puzzle was why he still possessed his weapon and armour; that simply should not be.

Regardless, his attention was immediately back on Lethe when she mentioned something that lifted Maryev’s feelings substantially. Ganondorf, the Gerudo King, had returned! The fact the fabled Hero of Time, the damnable Inquisitor, was nowhere to be seen was a boon. It quickly dawned on the Darknut that that was the purpose of the meeting; this motley assortment of jesters and low lives was to be the substitute of an apparently Goddess-blessed child. While it was still rather pathetic, it was a step up from enthusiastically expecting a prepubescent boy with no training to speak of to step up to save the world.

Of course, that was one way to look at it, Maryev saw it another way; every time the Inquisitor rose and defeated the Gerudo King, the Hyrule royal family grew more powerful and their influence crept further and further. It was mortifying to think about , and he would have no part in trying to stop the one true friend and ally the Darknut people had so these sniveling cowards could continue to spread like a plague. It was unjust and it was wrong. He found himself quietly agreeing with the boisterous and annoying Hylian girl who spoke out against the exhibition, claiming there was no Goddess (something Maryev didn’t believe in, regardless) telling everyone what to do, but it was likely the whims and machinations of the fairy. Although he knew it was ridiculous to expect her to fly across Hyrule and track down each individual for them to arrive at Kakariko Village after planting a thought in their head, there was something else at work that made her capable of pulling off such a feat. He almost recoiled in disgust at the revelation that he actually agreed with a Hylian. The end times were approaching, it seemed.

"I assume that all these years off the throne has done little to quench the desires and madness of the Insane King?" The Shrouded figure spoke in a voice that was far too mundane for his otherwise sinister appearance.

“Stay your tongue, cur. The Gerudo King has been the lone champion of those the Hylian Kingdom seeks to extinguish in its imperialistic conquests of the lands. We stand upon the graves of his personal assassins as we speak. Do you people not think that perhaps you have been manipulated since you were children, to believing in fantastic stories that play right into the King’s hands? Nobody, not the Hylians, not the Goron, not the Zora, no one stops to question this tale that has been told for countless centuries about how Ganondorf is a great evil that wants to destroy everything; did anyone stop to ask “But what does he plan to do after if he has destroyed the world?” Precisely! Absolutely no one who has power is that bafflingly stupid. Do you not question why the same races flock to join him, and why they all still exist? Likely not, because you think that they are monsters, and even the Gerudo are seen as lesser and backwards compared to the beautiful and fair Hylians.” He said, his voice mocking the very mentality of near everyone standing around him. “No. You question nothing because none of you are willing to do what is unpleasant or admit that you’re committing murder every time you slay a Moblin or a Lizalfos. You don’t see the wretched conditions your ancestors have forced upon them as your precious living space grows because of the might of the Hyrule army. So tell me why we should pay heed and join with this fairy who threatens all of your lives with a frightening tale that has been passed down by your forefathers to keep you from questioning the world you live in? Does anyone have any proof of Ganondorf’s purported evil other than the stories you’ve been told? I thought not.”

Oh man! Just as it was picking up the chapter ended! :(

So far, I really like how you write and that opening scene was genuinely touching! I think a bit more fleshing out of the world and what exactly the team is about will come, but I felt like I could have used more of an idea of what the world's like and what everyone has in common, perhaps a bit of insight about each character from the protag's POV. It also kind of felt like the chapter cut off at a really odd point, as it went from preparation to the first minutes of deployment and then ended. I think it wouldn't be as jarring if you either wrote to a bit of a cliff hanger or stopped just before they deployed. Overall, really fun so far and I am a fan of this digestable format! I really wantto see where this goes. :)

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