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4 yrs ago
Current So, as an American, what do I do when I need to choose between illegal immigration to Canada and dying in a civil war?
5 yrs ago
Woo! Got the prick!
8 yrs ago
When you try to write an essay on climate change but it just degrades into angry rambling halfway through.
5 likes
8 yrs ago
Conquer it, conquer the bread.
2 likes
8 yrs ago
Up until today I've never had any trouble with my EUIV Japan games. Today I got stomped five times in a row before even uniting the country.
2 likes

Bio

I'm a weeaboo communist. Are you surprised?

EDIT: You probably are now, but I'm not going to tell you why you wouldn't have been like two years ago. You get to agonize over that yourself.

Most Recent Posts

Kwedolobhakalle, Tactical Room
Admiral Brita Veronika, General Charlotta Aslög, and Jade Sigfrid Halvar were all standing around the tactical table, which had a semi-transparent top with the rest of it covered in stone to hide the candles that lit the almost opaque tabletop, which allowed some of the light through. Veronika appeared to be speaking.
"- And if we did that, then the entirety of the New World would be ours!" She exclaimed, perhaps somewhat over-excitedly.
"Erm... sorry Miss Veronika, but I do not see how killing all of the natives using huge floating cannons would help us take over the New World. Is killing the natives-if there are any-not counterproductive? It would deprive us of the ability to peacefully absorb them into our empire, and that ability is something the need. I suspect that many other nations will see natives as an obstacle, but they are sorely mistaken, all we have to do is show the natives how much good we can do for them and they will join us! I mean, wouldn't you join an empire that could raise your quality of life greatly while also letting you keep your beliefs and traditions? I can answer that for you, you would. I gave the chosen governor orders to do so, it is useless to bicker over." Said Sigfrid.
"Then I have a proposal." Said Charlotta "Since other nations are trying to colonize the New World as well, the absorbed natives could either be used to show other nations that we have formed good relations with the natives, or be used as a ruse to make other nations believe that we have learned how to thrive on the New World and have spread out across the entire area. Or we could go with Admiral Veronika's crazy kill em' all idea."
"Hey, it seemed like a good idea in the plaertid!" Said Admiral Veronika in defense.
"That plaertid being here about one hour ago, I assume?" Mocked Sigfrid.
*Ahem*
The United Vanjanan Empire shall claim the cove and all the fertile lands within through way of monetary transaction and further colonization. Our superior vessels shall reach the New World quickly due to their advanced construction, and then we shall begin the (mostly) peaceful absorption of any natives that may exist into our glorious empire!
(TotallynotimperialistIpromise)
Kwedolobhakalle, United Vanjanan Empire. (One month ago)
Sigfrid Halvar was not one you would expect to be leader of the richest known nation on the planet. He busied himself with things such as mathematics and the sciences, the closest thing to kingly he studied was military tactics, and then for enjoyment. He didn't think he would ever have to fight anyone, just pay them off. However, that area of study wouldn't ever make him appear like a king to anyone outside of Vanjana, the cultures were simply too different. Sitting upon the Jade Throne (which he had personally modified to include a much-needed cushion), he felt like nothing more than a figurehead, with the Representative House doing everything important. All he did was say yes or no, and sometimes suggest something to them. In fact, some of the richer individuals in Vanjana had more power than he did. While he didn't see himself as power hungry, everyone knew that he loved power. It was unlikely that he would kill for it, but if he could get it without harming anyone too far down the cultural totem pole he would jump on the opportunity.

His throne room was a sight to behold, while not as large as others, it had been known to intimidate diplomats purely as a result of how expensive it must have been to build. The throne was solid Jade, with a purple cushion made using the most expensive feathers despite them having no actual affect on how comfortable it was. The walls were decorated with various commissioned paintings and the Vanjanan flag was displayed above his throne. The entire ceiling was one huge mural, depicting the port of Kwedolobhakalle bustling with activity. It was painted using the most expensive materials on the market, again just to show off the great wealth of Vanjana. There was a red carpet leading up to the throne, embedded in the marble floor. The edges of it were covered in pure gold, which was cleaned daily to prevent it being anything but perfectly clean. At the very end of the room were the doors, two huge slabs of jade clad in two thick gold stripes that left a strip of jade visible in the middle. Those doors opened slowly- being cracked open by a team of men standing by purely for that reason-to reveal a man wearing ornate robes that identified him as a member of the Exploration Guild. He was carrying a scroll with him, its contents hidden.

"Why have you come to me, good sir?" Asked Sigfrid, getting up out of the throne and walking towards the man.
"My Jade, our explorers have made a great breakthrough! While attempting to find a shorter sea trade route with Lydiah, my exploration fleet stumbled upon an unknown continent. We immediately returned, and began to search for other groups that had found it as well. I managed to acquire a full map of this 'New World', and it is just as large as Edoniras! I have taken the liberty of searching the map for habitable colony sites, and I have found many in an inland bay that is directly in the center of the continent. It is in the perfect location to trade with natives-if there are any-and other colonies. I have come to report this and ask for permission to form a colonization fleet."

Sigfrid's eyes lit up at the thought of a new continent, and he snatched the scroll right out of the man's hands. He unrolled it, revealing a map of the new world.
"Prepare a colonization force! I want it launched as soon as possible, just uproot the filthiest towns near the port cities. They'll be happy to leave." He scrawled a quick decree onto the map scroll, giving the explorer permission from the Jade to recruit colonists. "I shall prepare the navy."
He hurried out of the room, his royal robes flapping in the air behind him as he nearly ran through the doorway.

Kwedolobhakalle Port, Present Day
Citizens of the capital waved at the leaving colonists, knowing that they could face untold dangers in the new world. However, that was simply at the back of everyone's minds. What was at the front was the fact that those colonists would be the first Vanjanans to venture forth into the New World. Sigfrid stood on the docks, honoring the colonists with a traditional Vanjanan salute; the left hand held at chest height with the palm facing up, and the first two fingers on the right hand (barring the thumb) extended in a salute reminiscent of those used by other nations. The Navy and Army bands played the Vanjanan Imperial March, but over their noise came the voice of Jade Sigfrid Halvar, screaming at the top of his lungs to project his voice sufficiently.
"Today, we begin a new age for the great nation of Vanjana! The age of colonization! May the brave few on these departing vessels be immortalized through their actions from this day forward, blazing the trail for the colonists to follow! FOR VANJANA!"
"FOR VANJANA! FOR THE JADE!"
The ships dropped their sails and turned in the direction of the wind, carrying them on towards the new continent.

Colony fleet:
900 Colonists
1,500 Soldiers, all Regulars
One Frigate
Two Barques
Three Brigs
Twenty Cows, fifteen Pigs, ten Chickens, ploughs, fifty horses, a years supply of food (Rationed, preserved) Axes, farming equipment, seeds for various fruit and vegetables, Fryas, Cloth, essentials, personal belongings, tents for temporary accommodation. Five large Vanjanan flags. One reproduced portrait of Jade Sigfrid Halvar. Multiple bars of gold for trading.

Course:
Lakfakalle
"Oh... I see, you're in one of those situations. I had a human father, the guy spent all of our credits on alkake. Down the hall is the equipment room, throw on a pilot's uniform, pick up a pistol, and go down to the Civilian Warehouse. Tell the guy selling the food that you're a volunteer for the Abh Imperial Pilot's Union, Hawking Squadron, Registration Number 4-15-12-16-8-9-14. He'll let you through, you can steal some food and get out of the building though the delivery entrance at the back. Keep the uniform and weapon, you can come back any time and do the same thing. Good luck."
LIV Terminator
"Your people work quickly, I am impressed." Said Kuuyi, picking up the recorders and taking them over to a computer terminal. It likely seemed archaic to the Fleetmaster, a non-holographic screen displaying a simple interface. There was quite obviously a five-hundred year gap between the weapons installed on the Terminator and every other peace of technology used by the Children of Lakfakalle. The screen automatically displayed the data from the recorder.
"Computer, run analysis on sensor data. Search for unknown objects and determine their trajectories. Extrapolate possible origin points to within a thousand light years of Lakfakalle, scan all possible origin points with faster than light wormhole electron pulse system. Narrow search to areas where metallic structures were detected. Eliminate all systems explored by friendly vessels."
"Yes, Captain." Replied the computer, at least the Federation had mastered the elusive voice-to-text program that had plagued thousands of species with typos over the 11 billion or so years of sentient life existing. After just a few moments, the screen displayed twenty six systems.
"Have your people been to any of these systems? Twenty six jumps passes the line on our drive systems. Besides simply not being able to produce enough negative mass fuel for that many jumps, the chances of catastrophic fore particle buildup increase dramatically after the tenth consecutive jump. You see, our FTL works in real space instead of another dimension or universe like literally every other nation's FTL does. This allows extreme particle buildup inside our warp bubble, unless that buildup is moved to the aft by a tractor beam system, then when the vessel exits warp the particle and radiation buildup is flung into the system from its outskirts. Due to the distances involved, the buildup is large enough to destroy an entire planetary system. After ten jumps, the tractor beam system can be easily damaged, at which point the vessel and its crew are ordered to remain at the exact same velocity for the rest of their existence to avoid such a disaster. Obviously, we cannot afford to lose this vessel as it is our only designated warship."

Lakfakalle
Two Abh Commandos rounded the corner in the corridor, talking casually about a planet named "Shuroh". When they saw what appeared to be a teenage girl, they stopped and stared at her with a confused look on their faces.
"What are you doing in here?" One of them said "You can't get your base rations from here, this isn't civilian food storage. This section holds the food that's going out to the colonies. Civilian storage is across the bridge to the other half of the building across the road. Hey... do you have work credits, kid?"
Vanjanan Imperial March
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aRzks4V-gT4

I swear, I never intended to use a Star Trek based song! It just happened to be my favorite for the role. Why is it in a completely non-Swedish language? Because it's in Old Vanjanani, Modern Vanjanani came into being due to Lydiahn influence, but they still use Old Vanjanani for writing and in some songs. Also, I am aware it doesn't quite fir with other MArches and Anthems, that's because I have fully embraced the idea that this is an alternate universe, and thus designed a somewhat alien culture.
I'm sort of surprised at my navy, I wasn't expecting 10 Galleys. I suppose the fact that my soldiers will constantly be vomiting makes up for that though.
duck55223 said
Gowia quick question since it will be central to this RP, how will colonization and exploration of The New World be handled?


I was wondering this as well, will it be more stat-based or more writing-based?
duck55223 said
Biggest GDP1.United Vanjanan Empire(83b)2.Lydiah(73b)3.Numberg(70b)4.Lance Empire(69b)5.The Glorious Republic of New Drakran(66b)6.The Empire of Corustaria(65b)7.Azor(60b)I just went and made a ranking of Highest GDPs.


I will kill you all with silver cannons that fire solid gold cannonballs. My muskets shall fire gold coins.
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