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Stranger Beetles

Especially in the sleepy little town of Hawkins.

They'll probably pass her off as an foster kid, since there probably already rumors about of their miscarriages.

Then they actually adopt her

And beetlejuice

Stranger Beetles

A tear sparkled in Barbara's eye, and she reached a hand up to wipe it away. Beetlejuice seem to catch on that his wildly inappropriate behavior was even more inappropriate right now, and clammed up.

"We've tried," Barbara said softly. "But we can't seem to make it happen." She didn't particularly want to talk about this subject with a child she just met. "Maybe that's why you found us." She smiled down at Lydia, brushing her hair out of her face. "Why don't you head to bed, sweetheart?"

Beetlejuice followed Lydia up the hall, waiting until they were in the guest bedroom before breaking the silence. "Well that was morbid," he said, crossing his arms. "And what did Babs mean by "maybe that's why you found them"? We aren't staying here. This is just a temporary gig."

Was it possible that Beetlejuice was...jealous? Afraid, maybe, that the Maitlands made insanely better guardians than he did? Which they did. Afraid that Lydia wouldn't need him anymore? That maybe he'd be forgotten when she realized how much she preferred other humans over the gross demon of highly questionable morals?

Stranger Beetles

I agree. That'd be super cute! Maybe the neighborhood kids?

Stranger Beetles

Barbara heard the bathroom door open, and was going to ask Lydia what hair type she had, but paused. The girl had wandered up the hall and stumbled upon their would-be nursery. The girl seemed afraid upon noticing she was there, but Barbara just gave her a soft, if not a bit forced, smile.

"It's okay, hun. We don't go in there much anymore." She leaned over and pulled the door shut. "Do you think you'll be okay staying in that room by yourself?"

Beetlejuice missed the scene as he floated up, and broke the tone as usual. "Couldn't find a single damn sex toy in this whole house. These two have got to be the most vanilla couple I've ever seen!"

Did Beetlejuice adore Lydia? Of course. Would he do everything in his power to keep her safe and happy? Absolutely. Was he a good parental role model? Hell no.

Stranger Beetles

"I wouldn't use the word pathetic," Beetlejuice said, his image popping up in the mirror. "Pitiful, maybe. But nothing about you is "pathetic", kid."

Barbara poked her head in the door. "Here you go, hun. These are the best I could find." She set down a t-shirt, a pair of draw string shorts, and an entire pack of cheap, unopened underwear that she meant to return to the store, but never got around to. She smiled at Lydia warmly. "Let us know if you need anything!" And with that, she was off to google how to take care of ethnic hair.

Beetlejuice looked back at her. "Wow...they really are going the extra mile, aren't they? I wonder what's wrong with them." His lack of faith in humanity wasn't exactly surprising. "Well, in the meantime, I'll be snooping around. Maybe I can find where they keep their grown up toys at." With that, he grinned wickedly and flew out of the mirror, phasing through the door and cackling down the hall.

Stranger Beetles

The Maitlands were both horrified at the implication that there was any other kind of bed besides one with fresh, clean sheets, blankets, and pillows. "Of course, sweetie," Barbara said. Adam was already driving them home. "And I'm sure we can find you something to wear once you get cleaned up."

They arrived at the house shortly, and the Maitlands led Lydia inside.

"Oh...my...god. Is this a house or did we just walk into a Pottery Barn?" Beetlejuice commented loudly behind her. The house was neatly manicured with bright whites and grays, crisp and clean. It looked like the exact opposite of somewhere a gross demon would be found.

Barbara set her stuff down and beckoned Lydia to follow her to the guest bedroom. "Here you are, Delia. The guest bathroom is right up the hall, and if you need anything at all, just let us know, okay? I'm going to get you some of my clothes to change into. They'll probably be a little big, but maybe we can go to the store tomorrow and find you something, okay?" It was clear that having a child to take care of was Barbara's true meaning in life. She was so excited she was gushing.

BJ poked his head into the room. "Holy shit, this is the guest bedroom?" It featured a queen sized bed, and was decked out in the latest in basic white people decor. "What do these people do for a living?"

Stranger Beetles

Barbara needed to love and protect this child, pronto. "Oh hun...would it be okay if you came home with us tonight? We have a spare bedroom you could sleep in, and we could get this figured out in the morning."

BJ was looking at Lydia with a soft frown, wishing he could hug her right now. He was actually grateful to hear Babara's offer. This was probably their best shot at getting a roof over their head any time soon, even if only temporary.

"Better go with the labradoodles," He said, "I'll keep an eye on, ya, don't worry."

Stranger Beetles

The building literally wouldn't exist anymore. He'd implode it

Stranger Beetles

The doctor left his questionnaire at that and dropped it. He looked at the x-rays and came back.

"Well, the good news is it isn't broken, it's just dislocated. We can get it set right and you'll be in a sling for a little while, but you should be fine. I'll get your arm numbed up and we'll get it taken care of."

Beetlejuice couldn't help but bristle at the sight of the doctor coming back with a needle. It took some self restraint not to freak out and demand that Lydia run for her life. Once her arm was numb, Dr. Whitman popped her shoulder right back in and gave her a sling to wear her arm in.

"Just be mindful of it for the next few days," He instructed as he showed her and Maitlands out. Beetlejuice followed them.

"Dang. I really wanted to sign a cast," He said. Although he seemed much happier now that he knew she didn't have any broken bones. Once back in the car, the Maitlands sat in the parking lot, unsure of where to go next.

"Are you sure you don't have an address, hun? Any family nearby we can take you to?" Barbara looked both sad and concerned.

Stranger Beetles

She's grounded