ALrighty! Woke up from a night of sleep and am ready to GO! Incidentally this is day 3, so no matter what I am doing or where I am at, I have to change into a Succubus at midnight!!! The transformation Will last from midnight until 0500, where I must either stay out of the town or get mauled by everyone >>
ANYWAY with that fun ahead, lets eat something. Wait, JOB? Chopping wood? DO I LOOK like a woodcutter to you? Screw you lady, gimme some mead and food and I'll be gone!

Hmmm. It's like 5 in the morning and pouring rain. Looking about, I DON'T think Whiterun is the best place to live a thiefy lifestyle. I need a place with more rich people. More people period. I'm thinking SOLITUDE for my perma-home :D So, off I go. In the rain.

OOH a camp! I wonder what lies within. Methinks I'll check it out. I mean, what could POSSIBLY go wrong here?

Well. I mean. I found *something.* And at least nothing tried to eat me, that's always a plus.

Hey, check out my **sack** huehueh

....of potatoes. POTATOES. WTF did ya'll think I was talking about.
dirty minded bastards
Well, ready to move onto Solitude, just gonna walk through these rolling plains and OMFG WTF IS THAT?!!! A friggin mammoth skull? No. Maybe um. Maybe we should tread carefully here >>

And THAT is what you call a NOPE location. Nope, nope, nope, nope, nope and NOPE.

Ah crap, I have crabs.
I knew I shouldn't have screwed that dead body a while back 
Really? Why the hell does a crab have a ring? There can be only ONE explanation. It must be married. I wonder...did I kill the husband or wife? And where is its life partner?? I feel kinda sad now. Well, not really but. Respect C to the Rab, much respect. I will probably eat your legs tonight. Just sayin.'

Well, I think I found the spouse crab. Better kill it too, or it might secretly follow me and slit out my throat for killing it's loved one. Mmmm. Grilled crab cakes tonight!

What's better than a wolf with one arrow to the face? A wolf with TWO arrows to the face!!!

OH GOD. OH MY GOD IS THAT MY BLOOD?!?!!

OOH level up time :D I suppose it was worth bleeding for. For some reason my SS didn't work in my leveling screen so let me tell you what I did. I picked health, and I took the first pickpocket perk, which increases my chances of successfully pick-pocketing by 20%. A successful thief must know how to pick someones pocket, after all.

I'm just gonna take a shortcut to Solitude and NOPE. Giant arches looking all epic and shit. I have a bad feeling about this. Better be cautious.

I KNEW IT! Not just no, but hellll to the NO. At my level I would get totally rekt by a troll. So, I'm gonna take the LONG way around. Eff this, I'm out.

Just gonna slide down the mountain here and hope I don't slip and fall to my doom

Such a nice view! And also a nice reminder that one wrong move and I snap every bone in my body. *In Consuela voice* Noooooo noo.

I ran into a Kahjiit! I may as well start my life of crime now. YOUR GP OR YOUR HP!!!!
.....what? It's a line.
it doesn't suck *at all*
Yay, I got 3 vials of Skooma from the lil kitty. And, because of one of my mods, I can sell Skooma to people for some GOOD money. Oh yeah. Such a PURRfect deal. Heh. See what I did there? Huehueh

This scantily clad lass looks like she might be into Skooma. Hmmm. Outskirts of Solitude. Selling Skooma. I vote YES.

What the actual f**k?! I can attempt to sell Skooma to a DOG?! What's more, is the dog actually talks! (Screenshot didn't take, what the F**K steam?! STOP NEGATING MY SCREENSHOTS!!!!! >:(
I don't know whether to be more concerned that my character can actually attempt to sell Skooma to a dog (he didn't buy it), OR that the dog can actually talk to decline the offer. There's something awfully fishy about all this.

Well, I arrived in Solitude just in time to watch an execution. Hmmm. Look at this crowd. *starts to sing* One of these things is not like the other, one of these things just DOESN'T belong.....

Poor Roggvir. All he wanted was to get aHEAD in life. Ah well. We all knew he was HEADed for trouble anyway. Okay okay, sorry for the crappy puns. I guess this post has finally come to a HEAD.
okay I'll stop really we all know I won't.
