Trash Panda

Let Me Steal Your Heart [BuzzingBee + Dagger]

He's trying really hard not to talk about it cx

Let Me Steal Your Heart [BuzzingBee + Dagger]

Despite his efforts to eat like he normally would, Crow found it difficult to stomach his breakfast, so he ate more delicately than usual. He was still clinging to the hope that no one would notice he was acting differently, since Cedric didn’t know him well enough to be familiar with his habits and Penelope had been out late with him and would have known he didn’t get much sleep the night before. However, that hope was quickly dashed when he felt the knight press her leg against his beneath the table.

He knew she was probably doing so as a means to try and comfort him, but instead the gesture only served to confirm that she had noticed something was wrong with him. He knew her well enough to expect that meant she was going to question him about it as soon as she had the chance. His eyes flicked to Cedric across the table, as he was suddenly glad the nobleman was sitting with him. He didn’t feel like talking about the reason why he was acting differently, and as long as the other man was there, Penelope couldn’t bring up the subject.

Unfortunately, the wall that Cedric unknowingly provided didn’t last long. As the noble announced that he needed to go to his guard post, Crow cursed inwardly. For a moment, he toyed with the idea of saying that he needed to go to his lesson, so he would have an excuse to leave too, but he knew it would look strange if he left a half-finished plate of food behind. He hadn’t had much motivation to eat, so he’d been working on his breakfast too slowly to outpace the others.

Now alone with Penelope, he glanced at her furtively. As he’d expected, she wasted no time in asking him if he was alright. The viceroy shifted uneasily in his seat. He didn’t want to talk about his nightmare, but he also didn’t want to lie to her—especially when it hadn’t been that long ago that his lies had nearly gotten her killed by Jaxon. While he doubted there could be any serious repercussions to keeping a dream secret, he didn’t want to bring up past hurts by telling her that he was fine when he clearly wasn’t.

“Yes and no,” Crow answered her after a pause, absently poking at the food on his plate. “To be honest, I’d rather not talk about it… but you don’t need to worry.” He looked up from the table to meet her gaze sincerely. “It’s nothing important. I’ll be fine.” It was a truthful enough response in his opinion. It had just been a bad dream. Nothing was wrong with him aside from the fact that he’d gotten a little shaken up by it. He didn’t want her to overreact and think that it was worse than it really was.

Beneath the table, he reached for her hand and gave it a quick squeeze, hoping the gesture would be enough to show her that he was alright and convince her not to press him to tell her more.

Let Me Steal Your Heart [BuzzingBee + Dagger]

He's not as subtle as he thinks lol
Crow's really hung up on his dream

Let Me Steal Your Heart [BuzzingBee + Dagger]

Crow nodded when Penelope said she was going to work on writing more letters. Between everything else that was going on lately, he’d nearly forgotten about her plan to bring the war to a peaceful end. He let out a quiet sigh. After the brutal nightmare he’d just had, he was all the more eager to see the fighting stop as well. There was far too much violence going on in the outer villages. He and the rest of the peasants in the kingdom needed a break from it all.

As Penelope and Cedric spoke to each other, the viceroy lapsed into thoughtful silence. He tried to pay attention to their conversation but found it difficult as his mind kept wandering back to his dream. As hard as he tried to move on from it, he couldn’t get it out of his head. It frustrated him that something that hadn’t really even happened had affected him so much. It had just been a nightmare, but he was fixated on it like he’d really experienced everything.

Well, technically I have, he grimaced as he recalled the real slaughter in Tamsworth and the battle in Jaxon’s camp. Of course, neither event had happened the way they had in his dream. In the village, he had been running toward an overturned cart to hide, but he hadn’t gotten cut off by a tax collector—the man had ridden up from behind him and slashed his side with a sword. He hadn’t even seen it coming. The fight with Jaxon had been more similar, but he hadn’t actually been alone with the murderer, and he hadn’t pleaded for his life either.

Crow absently brought a hand to his side, where the scar from his childhood was concealed beneath his tunic. He could still feel the shadow of the blade that had cut through him long ago, and he wished the memory would stop assaulting him in his sleep. It was already hard enough to deal with when it happened to pass through his mind during the day. He didn’t need the added stress of reliving the nightmare while he was trying to rest at night.

Lost in thought, it took a moment for him to realize Penelope had asked him a question. He looked up at her blankly for a moment until he recalled what she had said. “Yeah,” he answered with a shrug. “Unless I’m told otherwise, I’d assume that’s what I’m doing every day.” Glancing over her shoulder, he saw that Preston had returned with his breakfast. The boy set the plate down in front of him and tested it quickly before giving a short bow and leaving the group of nobles alone again.

Crow looked down at the food his attendant had brought, suddenly wishing he’d asked the boy to bring him a smaller portion than usual. He still didn’t have much of an appetite that morning, and he wasn’t sure if he could finish it all. Regardless, he didn’t want to draw attention to himself, so he forced himself to eat what he could while he was sitting with the others.

Let Me Steal Your Heart [BuzzingBee + Dagger]

Crow's definitely having an off day ^^;

Let Me Steal Your Heart [BuzzingBee + Dagger]

Fortunately, because there weren’t as many nobles in the Great Hall this late in the morning, it didn’t take long for Crow to spot an empty table on the far side of the room. He was about to take a step toward it when a subtle motion caught his eye. Glancing back toward Penelope’s table, he hesitated as he saw her wave to him. He was still uneasy about the idea of sitting with Cedric, but he didn’t want to purposefully ignore her either. She had already seen him, so he would look like he was if he still went to the other table now.

“Penelope waved at you,” Preston spoke up unhelpfully at his side.

“I know,” Crow muttered.

“Are you going to sit with her?” the attendant asked.

“I’m not sure yet.”

Preston tilted his head curiously, “Are you avoiding her?”

“No, I just…” Crow trailed off with a sigh. “Never mind.” It was too much trouble to explain that he wasn’t fond of her current choice of company. Instead, he made his way through the crowd, silently deciding that he might as well join her, since the other option was drawing far more attention to him than he would have liked.

Knowing where he was going to be sitting, his attendant walked off to fetch his breakfast from the kitchen, leaving him to approach the table alone. When he reached it, he sat down next to Penelope a little closer than he normally would have. At the moment, he craved her presence more than he cared about keeping a low profile around the other people in the castle.

Across the table, he noticed that Cedric didn’t seem quite as enthusiastic about his arrival as Penelope was. However, he couldn’t care less what the other man thought of him. He was too busy trying to shake off his lingering discomfort from his nightmare to pay any mind to what the knight’s ex suitor thought of him.

“So,” he turned to Penelope, resting his elbow on the table and propping his chin in his hand as he broke the silence between them. “Got any plans for the day?” Despite his efforts to act as he normally would around her, he couldn’t bring himself to fake more than a half smile as he held her gaze. He just hoped she would mistake his subdued attitude for weariness after the long night.

Let Me Steal Your Heart [BuzzingBee + Dagger]

Oh geez xD She's surrounded

You can have her invite Crow over if you want btw. He'd sit with her and Cedric if she wanted him to. He's just skittish right now ^^;

Let Me Steal Your Heart [BuzzingBee + Dagger]

Crow could feel Preston’s eyes on him as they walked through the halls of the castle. Even though the attendant had been willing to drop the subject before, he knew the boy was trying to come up with a way to bring it back up again. He hoped he would just read the mood and give up, because the last thing he wanted was to think about his dream again. It was still too fresh in his mind. He could still see the bloody corpses of the villagers of Tamsworth and Jaxon’s cruel sneer as if they were right in front of him. He shuddered at the thought, letting his eyes wander over the tapestries in the corridor as he tried to distract himself from the grisly image.

Unfortunately, Preston wasn’t very good at reading the atmosphere.

“So, why did you scream earlier?” the attendant pressed tentatively. He seemed to have decided on a direct approach, since he couldn’t come up with a gentler way to address the subject.

Crow shook his head. “It was nothing,” he lied. “Don’t worry about it.”

“People don’t scream for no reason—not like that,” Preston insisted, studying him with a concerned expression. “Even the closest guards heard you. They wanted to go to your room, but I told them to let me go first, because, well… you know.” He shrugged, and the viceroy nodded, understanding that the servant had been cautious to make sure he wouldn’t get caught for sneaking out the night before. Even though he was chagrined that the guards had heard him, he was grateful that the attendant had been smart enough to keep them from barging into his bedchamber before he’d had a chance to disassemble the cord they had built.

“The point is,” Preston went on as he got back on track. “I know it wasn’t ‘nothing,’ and I want to help you if—”

“It’s nothing you can help with then,” Crow said sharply and then winced, averting his gaze. He hadn’t meant to speak to the boy so harshly. “Sorry. I just don’t want to talk about it, so can we please drop the subject?”

Preston’s shoulders fell slightly, and he gave a meek nod, “Alright.”

“Thank you,” Crow murmured.

The two spent the rest of the walk to the Great Hall in uncomfortable silence. When they arrived, the viceroy looked over the room to see if he could find anyone he knew. He’d left his bedchamber rather late that morning because of how long it had taken him and Preston to put the linen sheets away, so he doubted Naida was still there. However, even though his sister was absent, he caught sight of Penelope sitting at a table nearby.

He took a step toward her, eager to seek her company while he was still feeling distraught, but then stopped when he recognized the nobleman she was sitting with. As his eyes landed on Cedric’s face, he bristled slightly. The memory of what the other man had done to the knight before was still fresh in his mind, and he wasn’t sure how to act around him. That plus his current emotional state left him far from enthused by the idea of spending a meal with the noble.

He shifted his weight from his right foot to his left, weighing the choice of going to Penelope and putting up with Cedric or spending the morning without her to avoid the nobleman’s company. Perhaps if he had been in a better frame of mind he would have still jumped at the chance to be with her, but at the moment, he found the latter option a bit more appealing.

So, instead of approaching her, he wavered by the door, looking over the Great Hall for an empty table to sit by himself.

Let Me Steal Your Heart [BuzzingBee + Dagger]

Crow's started out as low as it could get ^^;
He's not gonna be in the mood to take anyone's shit this morning xD

Let Me Steal Your Heart [BuzzingBee + Dagger]

Crow dreamed he was in the village of Tamsworth.

All around him, a market was bustling with activity. Vendors called to the crowd, encouraging them to come see their wares and tempting lookers with low prices. Buyers flitted from stand to stand among them, drawn like bumble bees to colorful flowers. The chaos was deafening but also exhilarating in its own, unique way that sent thrills of excitement through the thief. He couldn’t remember why it had been so long since his last visit.

He wove through the sea of people, his feet carrying him effortlessly between them as he joined their exploration of the secrets the market had to offer. The sounds of their cheerful voices were musical. They lifted his spirits and painted a smile on his lips as he wandered among them. He couldn’t recall why he had come to the market, but he didn’t care. He was too caught up in his intrigue with the exotic wares of the traveling merchants. Everything was new and strange in a captivating way.

For a while, he meandered about the marketplace, bouncing from stand to stand with the rest of the villagers. However, as he did, he couldn’t shake the feeling that he was missing something; that something was off. He just couldn’t put his finger on what it was. Disturbed by the foreboding tug at his heart, he slowed to a stop and spun in a circle, looking around at all the happy people in the market. There was no sign of danger anywhere. He frowned, confused why he seemed to be the only one with a sense of dread. If something was wrong, surely someone else would notice it too, right? But nothing seemed out of place.

Suddenly, he felt his heart begin to race, and a terror gripped him that made his breath catch in his throat. He brought a hand to his chest. He had an intense urge to look up, but he somehow knew that if he did, he was going to break the spell. The cheerful marketplace was an illusion, but he didn’t want to let it go. He wanted to hold on to the dream because the reality was too frightening to face.

But the urge was too strong to fight.

Against his own will, his gaze lifted to the sky, and his eyes widened with horror. The once-blue canopy had turned blood red, like a gruesome sort of sunset. He stared at it, transfixed, until his attention was ripped away by an agonized scream. All around him, the market had plunged into chaos. Knights on horseback rode through the streets, cutting down anyone and everyone in their path, and bodies had already begun to litter the ground.

Crow’s breaths came to him short and shallow as panic began to well up inside of him. He turned and ran, sprinting as fast as his now child-sized legs could carry him toward an overturned cart nearby. If he could just make it there, he knew he would be safe. The knights wouldn’t see him. He could just wait until they left.

He had almost made it when the tax collector cut him off.

The thief skidded to a stop, staring at the man on his horse like a bird before a serpent. His eyes were fixed on the ebony mare’s bloodied hooves, stained crimson with the blood of his own people. He wanted to run, but he couldn’t bring himself to move. He knew he was going to die. He squeezed his eyes shut and let out a scream of his own just as the knight’s sword pierced his flesh.

“Goodbye, stray.”

Crow’s eyes snapped open at the sound of the sickeningly familiar voice. Suddenly, he was no longer in Tamsworth; he was in Jaxon’s camp. The murderous thief was standing before him with his sword pushed through his middle, all the way up to its hilt. He gagged, feeling the blood well up in the back of his throat.

“Don’t…” the word came out, weak and pathetic, as he begged for his life. It only seemed to encourage Jaxon more. A sinister smile contorted the other thief’s face just before he ripped the blade out, and everything turned scarlet as the sky…

--

Crow gasped and sat up with a jerk, clutching at his chest where Jaxon had stabbed him. It took a moment for him to regain his bearings enough to realize he wasn’t in the thieves’ camp. He was in the castle, and there was no sword in his chest either. Still, he couldn’t stop the trembling that had taken over his body. It had felt so real. He could have sworn he had just relived it.

He lifted his shaky hands to his head, trying to slow his breathing. “Just a dream…” he murmured to himself, as if saying it out loud would make him believe it. He repeated it a few more times under his breath until his heart finally stopped hammering so painfully in his chest. He let his hands fall to his lap, his jaw hanging open slightly as he panted with adrenaline. It may have been a dream, but it had been a vivid one. He found it difficult to completely shake off the unease that wrenched his stomach.

Still on edge, the viceroy startled as his door suddenly opened and Preston stepped inside. The attendant’s skin was slightly flushed, as if he had been running. He stared at him with wide eyes for a moment before he hurried over to his bedside. “Are you okay?” he asked concernedly, resting a hand on his arm. “Do you need me to get Eldon?”

“I’m fine,” Crow shook his head, leaning away from the boy’s touch. He didn’t want Preston to feel him tremble.

“I heard you scream from halfway down the hall,” Preston knitted his brow in disbelief. “It sounded like you were in pain.”

I screamed? Crow blinked. He’d had nightmares in the past, but he’d never screamed out loud before—at least, not to his knowledge. “I’m fine,” he repeated, forcing himself to climb down from the bed. His legs felt weak, but they didn’t give out underneath him. He turned back to the attendant. “Help me put the linens back in the wardrobe. I was too tired to put them away last night, so I just shoved them under the bed.”

Preston eyed him with a frown, and for a moment, the viceroy worried he wouldn’t drop the subject. However, after a pause, he nodded compliantly. “Okay.”

Crow sighed quietly and sat down on the floor with the boy as they worked together to untie the mass of sheets and fold them neatly. The task took most of the morning, since Preston was a bit perfectionistic, and the thief’s hands were still unsteady, but at least it helped him take his mind off his dream. When they finished, the viceroy reluctantly accepted his servant’s help to get dressed and then made his way to the Great Hall for breakfast, wondering if he would even be able to eat while his stomach was still filled with rocks.