Status

Recent Statuses

6 mos ago
Current Okay, let's be honest for a second here, if we stop the status bar from being edgy angst land it really doesn't have anything going for it except sheer autism.
2 likes
6 mos ago
Does anyone know where you can get a white trilby embroidered with threatening messages? Asking for a friend.
3 likes
6 mos ago
My genius truly knows no bounds. Only an intellect as glorious as mine can possibly G3T K1D.
3 likes
8 mos ago
Imagine how rapey you have to be to imply you ever need a chloroform rag. Also imagine how stupid you need to be, because that's really not how that works.
1 like
8 mos ago
The government should fear the governed, not vice versa. Bring the oligarchy crumbling to the ground. #Wraith4Mod2k19
4 likes

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Behold the Terrorists of Valhalla:



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Penelope continued to tap the keys on her laptop as the situation progressed. She didn't look down at it as she typed, keeping her eyes firmly glued to the live feed, and her power trained on Matthew. As he turned to address her more directly, she knew exactly what was going on. She figured that John did too--but he was too high strung and too occupied to act on it. A stupid little soldier who only knows how to follow orders indeed. she allowed herself to think, a small indulgence given that the situation was admittedly high octane.

Matthew's words had something frantic about them--something mirrored in his emotional state. She was a little surprised by that fact, given how he normally acted and reacted. Matthew had a quiet kind of control on many situations, as if he were simply unaffected by what was going on. The state of being of an impartial watcher, something almost inhuman in its asceticism, but that was likely just because of how... enervated he always felt to Penelope. Now he was very much in, well, not outright panic--but something close, in his own little way. She made a mental note of the situation, something to file away and dissect later. A piece of the puzzle to be examined and slotted neatly into place when there was the time and the inclination to do so.

"Not a distraction. She isn't making enough noise--she couldn't know how we'd react, so the only way to reliably distract us would be to make too much noise for us to deal with, proverbially." Penelope replied, offhandedly. She shot a glance at John, briefly, that carried all of the intent she needed it to: Your mind has failed you and now you must rely on mine. If you value the First Guard, shut up and let me talk. Whether or not John let that slide would give Penelope more information for her evaluation of him, but right now she knew that he'd let her have the floor if only for enough time for her to work out what was going on.

"It..."

Penelope went silent for a moment before standing up and closing her laptop, moving to stow it away in its case as her eyes went wide and her pupils dilated. Her breath hitched in her throat and her mouth was left slightly agape as the wheels turned in her head.

"It's a stress test. That's all they're doing--they want to know how we'll respond, with whom, and what our limits are. This is all just a puppet show--the cards that Shaker is holding are all blank. I can't tell you how to react, but we've already given them information--I think that our best course of action is to continue and deliberately mislead them as to just how we operate, what we can do, what our decision making looks like. They know full well that we can't disband the First Guard on the drop of a hat, and that negotiator you sent out... S.W.A.T?" Penelope paused, as if in thought, to remember his name. "has done you a great disservice by acquiescing to ostensibly save a life. That said... it works to our advantage in this instance because they are now under the impression that we operate emotionally and not logically. We have to consid--"

Penelope was cut off by a vibration in the right pocket of her trousers. It buzzed once, and then twice, and Penelope took it out of her pocket and immediately answered it.

"Make it quick." she hastily said, turning on her heel and moving to leave as she did. She made the motion of attempting to cover the mouthpiece of the device, though utterly failing, before looking directly at Matthew and saying "Emergency. Kelly needs me to review something urgently--I'll be back later."

"What've you got?" would faintly echo through the door before it was firmly closed behind her. Penelope made a waving motion to Sandra and mouthed a "thank you" for the coffee before making her way to head out of the building and down to her car. Kelly only used the burner phone for serious matters, and she was already running on the adrenaline of--to her mind--working out the Shaker's plan.
Adrasteia


"Let’s all keep a cool head. Well, except you."


Adrasteia


"Let’s all keep a cool head. Well, except you."


that sounds like a whole bunch of effort joe

finding GMs who can actually write is no mean feat these days
yep that's about right


"I see my chance, reader (who is most certainly an avid animu fan!). I, the heroic and venerable WHITE DARGON LUNAR will, in turn, save Spongebyrne the Foreboden from certain in turn doom!"

White Dargon Lunar braced himself. This was going to be his most in turn challenging fight yet. His hair stood on end, agitating his signature white trilby just a touch. Was this finally going to be... a ふさわしい相手? As he stood before the GREAT INEFFABLE PRISONERER, he could in turn feel the adrenaline rising in turn. It was happening... he swore to his master that he would never unleash more than exactly 17.7-inturn-233% per cent (percent) in turn of his true power...

"MASTER... I MUST BREAK MY VOW TO YOU... THIS OPPONENT IS TOO IN TURN STRONG, IN TURN. I MUST USE THE FORBIDDEN TECHNIQUE. I MUST... USE MY SECOND ZANPAKUTOU!!! I HAVE NEVER FELT SO ALIVE, THIS COMBAT... IT IS THE GREATEST CHALLENGE I HAVE EVER FACED!!!"

"完璧な神のウィアブーの白いトリルビー... !"

White Dargon Lunar's twin swords flashed in turn in the mooninturnlight. Spongebyrne... would be saved!!!!!!!!!!! AND MAYBE IF HE SAVED SPONGEBYRNE, YURIYA COULD LOVE HIM AGAIN???????!!!!

And then White Dargon Lunar died, cleaved in two by the infinite mass of Goofykins' BUSTER SWORD.

The white trilby remained, floating to the ground.



"Ohayou, in turn, reader! I'm looking, in turn, for my, in turn, nemesis @BlackDragonSol! Have you in turn seen him, reader? The Black Dragon must be held in turn responsible for his crimes! あなたが順番にいなくて本当順番にに寂しい... 順番に ゆりや!!!"

the WHITE DARGON LUNAR crested above the skies of Detroit, their signature white trilby staying perfectly still atop their head.


it HAD been Karen

all along

there was never anoheter, no,m not even lisaFUCK you lisa you wretched harpy

KAREN had stolen the eggs, the precious eggs with which to make omelettes! The eggs, which had the potential to become children, could become GOTT3N... and if they could GET KID they coiuuld become an UNG3TT3NER of K1D?! but KAREN had stolen them all away, not delivered them, left them sonmwhere to become A GOTT3M3L3TT3!!!!!!! and that ckould not happen, no no, because the INFERNAL had taken all of the kids and so the SEMPITERNAL TWEENBEING had nobody to Fort Nites with or to Nite Forts wioth and deep within her dusty schkull a thought of what once was or perhaps could have been but had since been memorialised as a fortnite dance echoed

we live in a society... rise up G4M3RS...

"Mauris odio dui, tempus? Nec condimentum nec hendrerit nec orci duis? Id facilisis est, a tincidunt!" came the cry, crystal clear, through the woods. Karen didn't stand a chance.

BIUT LO AND BEHOLD

THERE WAS ONLY MARGARET, SCREAMING ABOUT KAREN!

"Fusce ac urna, diam. Mauris pharetra tortor mattis lorem ullamcorper ultrices."

"it WaS KAREN! kill HER! SHE STOLE AWAY THE EGGS! SHE FORGOT THEM, SHE ABANDONED THEM, SHGE LEFT THEM! TREACHEROUS GOOSEKIN!"

"Nulla eget facilisis massa curabitur et cursus nulla quisque eget. Dictum nibh lorem!"

"You CANNOT KILL ME! I AM SO MUCH MORE THAN MARGARET!!!! YOU CANNOT KILL A GOOSE, JUST AS YOU CANNOT KILL JOY! you cannot kill joy you cannot kill joy you cannot kill joy you cann kill joy you can kill joy you kill joy killJOY killJOY killJOY oh it's such rapture, such beneficence, such wondrous agony you killJOY you must join me let me KILL your JOY"

And then, like so many opponents in Fortnite, Margaret was simply gone. There was nothing left, not a speck, not a hint, that she had even been there. And the Sempiternal Tweenbeing thought for a second that she might have felt a tiny speck of something awakening deep within her, a beautiful joy, but then it, too, was simply gone.

"Curabitur venenatis elit sit amet pellentesque Detroit. Mauris pretium dapibus enim et pretium, proin."

And so the Sempiternal Tweenbeing vanished and reppeared in Detroit, ready to begin anew the hunt for TREACHEROUS KAREN AND HER VILE EGG-THIEF WAYS


The Sempiternal Tweenbeing; Forter of Nites; beBearer of the Spade of Hearts; beBearer of the Heart of Spades; Bane of the Gooseking and Goosekind and Goosekin (but not Geesekind); Inheritor of the Space Between the Space Between Spaces; Lord Incumbent of the Fifteenth Seven Two Two Eleven Six 9ety 6ix Bastion of the Time-Quintessence-Ravaged-Infernal-Survivors Therapy Group (on Tuesdays); Last of the Coven Tree’s Witchly Witcherssons; Ravag ██ he Eldrit ██ ██ ██ of Goosyk ██; The Fantastic ████████████ ██████ to ████ ██████████ of Thine Harmed Oncested ForesUnsons.



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