...

[ClocktowerEchos]

Solution: Get in a TARDIS or go into stasis!

Problem: I'm surrounded by idiots! ;-;

[Duthguy]

Solution: Trick them into leaving
Problem: I've got to get rid of a body

[Rusalka]

Solution: There's a dog food factory about eight miles up the road. Start there.

Problem: I've fallen and I can't get up

[Shorticus]

Solution: Did you try turning your feet on and off again? Did you unplug your feet from your shoes?

Problem: I have crushing self-loathing.

[WilsonTurner]

Solution: You're beautiful and you won The Great Race nine months before you were born. You have succeeded in a major achievement that millions haven't. Also, dogs look up to you. Literally. ...Problem solved.

Problem: I ate Underdog on a dare and now he's barking inside my stomach and I'm in the middle of math and everyone's looking at me.

[Duthguy]

Solution: Excuse yourself and go drink water until he drowns.

Problem: I somehow stole 10000 Euro from a drugs dealer and then accidentally set it on fire inside his new car destroying a possible escape vehicle and pissing him off even more. Help!

[Rusalka]

Solution:....well, you're fucked.

Problem: I'm trying to write my fanfic, but there's a drunk redneck party going on next door. How do I dispose of them in the most brutal and heinous but also quietest way possible?

[WilsonTurner]

Solution: Quietly board up the windows. Find a thick cloth that's soundproof. Drape it over the house. Find a half dozen dogs. Find a zombie. Take the zombie to infect the six dogs in subtle ways- then let loose the still normal but rapidly changing dogs into the house. Wait until screams have stopped. Remove soundproofing.

Wait until dawn, then clear it out with flesh-eating acidic gas that reduces biological matter into goo. Enter in hazmat suit; bring in loads of ammunition to the basement. Set all the ammunition off, along with too much alochol- let the house burn down to cover the evidence.

Problem solved.

Problem: There are so many problems that I can't even start.

[Dinh AaronMk]

Join the CIA

Problem: I need a Big Guy

[Saint Girralo]

Solution: go on Craig's List and ask for one.

Problem: Im suffering from depression.

[Ryu]

Solution: Just get out there, @Saint Girralo.

Okay, okay, I know it's a crappy solution, but let me explain!

Whether you have clinical depression or you're just really, really sad because of what's happened in your life recently that's put you in such a bad spot or whatever, you just have to get out there.

If it's clinical depression and you're taking anti-depressants? Get out there.

If it's just because of your life recently and you're just in a bad spot and yeah? Get out there.

What I mean by "get out there" is to friggin get out of your house or get out of wherever you are and just... do something. Do something with your friends, do something with your family, do something that makes you happy. Occupy your life with things to do. Find a hobby, grab a pint with your friends (if you're over 21 or whatever the drinking age is in your country), go to a party, hang out with your friends, go to a restaurant. Do whatever it is you need to do, just get out there.

Yeah, it might be hard because hey, I dunno you could be in school or perhaps you could have a job and that means your life is preoccupied with one of those two things (or maybe even both?), but whenever you can, just get out. Don't stay holed up in your house, don't sit behind your computer, just get out of your house and do something, whatever it is that'll make you happy. Surround yourself with friends and family, surround yourself with people, occupy yourself with something that'll get you to do something, something that'll make you... happy.

My Health teacher has clinical depression, he's currently on antidepressants and all, and I can remember him telling a story in front of the whole class (surprisingly he's very open about his life) that the only way to get out of being sad is to get out and do something, is to get out and try to be happy.

Using this AskReddit thread's first top comment, which if you don't want to click on it says,

You don't want to live but you don't want to die. You don't want to talk to anyone but you feel very lonely. You wake up in the morning and simply wait for the night to come.

I want to think... I want to believe that being depressed can be overcome by simply getting out there. By simply... occupying yourself with something to do. I haven't exactly been "depressed" before (or maybe I have and I don't know it, I know I've been extremely sad and have wanted to do nothing but lay in bed for days and never take showers before) but I know that just doing something, while it won't work immediately, it'll work out in the long run.

Best of luck buddy!

Problem:

*No friends on RP Guild

[Rusalka]

^This. @Ryu I can't tell you enough how true this is. Since I started working and surrounding myself with new people and new friends, I have been the happiest ever. I used to suffer majorly with depression and was on the brink of suicide. I knew I needed to get out of whatever storm I was consuming myself in, so I just figured one day I would apply for a job. Yeah, work does suck and the DM's an asshat, but all my co-wokers are really cool and fun to hang around. I swear I haven't smiled this much in practically ages.

Oh and as for that problem, the solution's right there. "Friend" button ;3

Problem: Thanks to my tax refund I now have a PS4 and Bloodborne....but THE FUCKING PACKAGE IS IN WISCONSIN AND I WANT IT NOOOOOOOWWWW!!!!!

[Duthguy]

Solution: Drive to Wisconsin.

Problem: I can't think of a good plan to get revenge on Rusalka for not helping me with my drugdealer problem