Hidden 3 yrs ago 3 yrs ago Post by an abomunist
Raw
Avatar of an abomunist

an abomunist Marginalia Conductor

Member Seen 2 days ago

Kind of an eleventh hour submission, but here goes. I'm admittedly not massively up to snuff on my Star Wars lore; I hope this is okay, I took a little bit of a liberty. Willing to change anything if need be.


3x Like Like
Hidden 3 yrs ago Post by Fiscbryne
Raw
GM
Avatar of Fiscbryne

Fiscbryne (he/him/his)

Member Seen 1 yr ago

@an abomunist Quillow is really interesting! I like him so far, especially the sin-eater quality of his trinkets and commitment to removing painful memories, even by force. I'm intrigued by the way his commitment to non-violence leads to a heavy use of the mind trick, a tool which—in my opinion—is far more invasive despite being less physically disfiguring. The medicalism of the process is really interesting especially because it's achieved through a tool of the far more spiritual Force. And I don't know if you've read Light of the Jedi, but if you haven't, this quote might prove interesting:



There isn't much that I would change off the top of my head save some small verbiage choices that don't obscure meaning too much—otherwise, he looks solid!
1x Like Like 1x Thank Thank
Hidden 3 yrs ago Post by an abomunist
Raw
Avatar of an abomunist

an abomunist Marginalia Conductor

Member Seen 2 days ago

@Fiscbryne Thank you! I haven't read Light of the Jedi, but I think I'll pick it up- reviews seem pretty solid. And a cursory glance through a wikipage on Elzar was very interesting, he seems like a cool character.
Hidden 3 yrs ago Post by Fiscbryne
Raw
GM
Avatar of Fiscbryne

Fiscbryne (he/him/his)

Member Seen 1 yr ago

It’s a little hectic, admittedly—Light of the Jedi is the book meant to introduce the era (and provide a little meat for Wookiepedia) and it shows—but I like the book for what it is. It’s really interesting to see Jedi both at their height and with a level of diversity among them that isn’t quite there in the prequel era (while not being so distant as to be the Jedi of the Old Republic). I like the villains because they’re a little edgy but fun in an over-the-top way, albeit a little weeby for my blood and with an oversimplified version of anarchism as their ethos; I am no huge fan of the vibro-shurikens Marchion Ro keeps on his person and I think it a little disappointing that the Nihil’s leadership don’t present an appealing response to the Republic save as warlords—I’d rather a real moral quandry. Regarding the prose, I have to disagree with what a lot of other fans might say: the prose itself isn’t super stellar, being functional but not beautiful, but it’s a fun read! I would recommend it if only for the look at a fresh era of Star Wars content.
2x Like Like
Hidden 3 yrs ago Post by Cyrania
Raw
Avatar of Cyrania

Cyrania

Member Seen 19 hrs ago

Just fyi, I've decided to move onto other things.

Thank you for giving me a chance. I hope you all have fun with this.
1x Thank Thank
Hidden 3 yrs ago Post by Fiscbryne
Raw
GM
Avatar of Fiscbryne

Fiscbryne (he/him/his)

Member Seen 1 yr ago

Seeing as the 5th has come and passed, I've chosen the two new members who will be joining our RP:

@boomerremover and @an abomunist, welcome aboard! You will receive invitations to the Discord server shortly; feel free to post your character sheets in the Characters tab now. If you would like to match my formatting (which is nice but by no means required), the color I'm using is color=dcb246. To all the rest of you, thank you for your applications and the effort put into them; I regret not being able to take on more.

Regarding the first IC post itself, don't feel compelled to match the length I have for this starter; a lot of what I have is largely scene-setting with the intent of providing room to write in your characters in the posts to come. While collabs will be generally welcome, I would rather this first post be individual if only to provide more characterization of your characters in the span of time from the crash to the end of Varman's post. Thank you in advance!
Hidden 3 yrs ago Post by seonhyang
Raw
coGM
Avatar of seonhyang

seonhyang

Member Seen 3 yrs ago

@Fiscbryne, I'm already starting work on a post! I'm just wondering how we should do titles/headers, if any at all.
Hidden 3 yrs ago Post by Fiscbryne
Raw
GM
Avatar of Fiscbryne

Fiscbryne (he/him/his)

Member Seen 1 yr ago

@seonhyang I like having headers if only for ease of finding a particular post, but format them how you wish! We could do similar headings or different ones, but I'm not bothered either way. The only thing I'll really say no to is colored dialogue but otherwise, feel free to format however you'd like!
1x Like Like
Hidden 3 yrs ago Post by Fiscbryne
Raw
GM
Avatar of Fiscbryne

Fiscbryne (he/him/his)

Member Seen 1 yr ago

Great posts all around! I'll reiterate some of what I've already mentioned on Discord along with a couple additions. Overall, I love the prose and the way that everyone has added on more details to that which I had laid out in the first post!

@an abomunist Once again, I love Quillow's struggles with grief now that he's the one dealing with loss rather than helping others cope with theirs. His lingering attachment to his Master's possessions despite the fact that he bids others to let go of their own is really interesting—I'm curious to see where the shift from taking away to taking with me is going to lead!

@seonhyang Your prose is luscious with sensory detail as always! I especially loved your elaboration upon Master Taspul and the anthropologists—I freely encourage everyone to make additions like that—and I love that it consequently makes Yerin feel more rooted in the Order through her past experience. Her real warm approach to nature and scientific curiosity is wonderful too, bridging some of the gap between science and the Jedi preoccupation with capital-N Nature in a way that feels joyous and lively.

@boomerremover Delste's care for Master Nikdoris is really interesting given her previous antipathy! I'm wondering where that will lead and if it will only last as long as no more words are coming out of his mouth. Even bitter, she's compassionate towards him, and I like that! Her attention to appearance and clothing is really interesting too. I know you had mentioned her being a little image-conscious and I love how that plays with the unfamiliar environment!

@Auz Sunao's early fear is great! I love how he's so soon overcome with grief and shock at the moment while also holding high expectations for himself. His mistrust for space and starships is interesting too as well as the way that his fastidious appearance is so quickly ruined. I'm eager to see the effects of these recent events going forward!

And speaking of going forward, I'll try to get a post out this weekend; afterwards we can split up into a couple short collabs as the Jedi engage with the Republic camp!
4x Thank Thank
Hidden 3 yrs ago Post by Fiscbryne
Raw
GM
Avatar of Fiscbryne

Fiscbryne (he/him/his)

Member Seen 1 yr ago

Hey y'all! With the second of our two divided collabs up, I'll have another post guiding us to a short collab between the all of us up by this weekend, focusing on the Jedi after they reconvene and discuss whatever matter it is that Simris wants to talk about. I'm pleased with all the elaboration into your characters that you provided, and I'd like to give a special thanks to @seonhyang for her portrayal of Dr. Stempara—I love how he oozes paternalistic energy in such a natural way, something that plays well off of his more sensitive and sympathetic Jedi interlocutors. Overall, the insight into all your characters' points of view has been lovely, and I'm excited to see where things go!
2x Like Like
↑ Top
© 2007-2024
BBCode Cheatsheet