Dervish Member
Let's get volatile
STATUS: Remember, nobody actually enjoys roleplaying if there isn't at least five shameful fetishes uncovered by the 2nd page. 5 yrs ago
- Last Seen: 1 yr ago
- Old Guild Username: Dervish
- Joined: 12 yrs ago
- Posts: 5991 (1.32 / day)
- VMs: 8
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Username history
- Dervish 12 yrs ago
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Latest 10 profile visitors:
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Most recent →
Nyxella,
TokyoPewPew,
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Status
Recent Statuses
5 yrs ago
Current
Remember, nobody actually enjoys roleplaying if there isn't at least five shameful fetishes uncovered by the 2nd page.
5
likes
7 yrs ago
Somebody stole my mood ring. I don't know how to feel about it.
14
likes
7 yrs ago
Let's be honest, it's far more satisfying and challenging to actually imagine what a character looks like than paste a hundred gifs of a celebrity and call it good.
4
likes
7 yrs ago
So, a team of players who are good at playing as a team in a team-based game are individually bad players. Seems kind of silly when you put it like that, no?
8
likes
7 yrs ago
My goal these days is to have an RP that can actually finish, or the very least, last a few years. I see way too many die on page one to take chances
4
likes
Bio
Lowering the site's value since January 2012.
Most Recent Posts
Yeah, if new people were to join, this would be the place to do it!
ImANargleHunter said
... My grandma gave me a switchblade?
Grannie has style.
Stitch a bitch for me, Nargle.
I think we just told somebody else we're full up, I think our numbers are pretty good for now.
Once again, I'll turn that over to the unwashed masses of this RP. Room for one more, or maybe later?
Once again, I'll turn that over to the unwashed masses of this RP. Room for one more, or maybe later?
Goldmarble said
Dervish, that is a mighty amount of ammunition there. Need any help shooting it? :P
When that picture was taken, it was about 1120 rounds. Now I have about 1020 left, so come on across the mountain, I'll even let you shoot my Lee Enfield. Ever see a water melon explode? I can make that dream come true.
Halo said
Remind me never to piss you off, Dervish. All I have is some particularly eye-stingy detergent spray.
I have 4 rifles (shotgun's coming up next), about 4 combat knives, 2 good sized folding knives, a tomahawk, and a "tactical" spear (which I freely admit I bought simply because it looked cool). Good for camping or, you know, stealing people's organs. I had pretty good lessons about knife fighting when I was in the army, the guy teaching us was an Afghanistan veteran.
My first forum is always going to be special, and this one has a community I like. I've been on a couple paintball forums where I never really got invested in it, and I did the BioWare forums, but this is the only one I've signed into on a daily basis and genuinely made some real friends.
Ew, now I'm getting disgustingly sentimental.
Ew, now I'm getting disgustingly sentimental.
Halo said
Jorick gave us a clue as to how to kill him - he suggested a gun, of all things.
ImANargleHunter said
Dervish, come on. That was something I told you in confidence.
Sorry, friend. I had to let the innocent people know before you went on your next rampage.
I'm trying to find you a cure, k. It's what friends do!
Unless, of course, you feel like sharing. Then we'll rek shit.
EDIT:
Halo, if you have Steam or Skype, hit me up. We'll become BFFs and frolic in the meadows or something! You're one of those guys I get along with super well but don't talk to outside this forum. Let's fix that shit.
Tripz, I have idle on Steam if you have it. I can ask if she wants me to give you her tag so you guys can talk about stuff like... I don't know.
3. Who isn't Lucian?
Bob Dylan.
4. Why does nat have so many shitty clones?
Because Nat's the most predominant person here in terms of the volume of posts. New people show up, see mostly Nat, and assume that's how shit goes. Then they emulate what they see in an attempt to fit in. The less keyboard happy of us groan as a result.
5. Why is sherlock a shitty mod?
Sherlock's exactly the kind of mod Spam needs, in general. She knows when to step in and when to let us be stupid shits.
6. Is sherlock a shitty nat clone?
Heroin, not even once.
7. Where are you why aren't you on
I'm currently visiting your mother.
8. Is spam the tumor inside RPG?
More of the liver, really.
9. Sherlock, how do you manage to be such a wonderful human being?
Brownie points only work if the person you're kissing ass to knows who you are.
11. Does anyone rememeber code guru? The non shitty mod guru.
I might have been around when he was, I can't remember.
12. What is the meaning of life, and how the hell would you know?
To crush your enemies, see them driven before you, and to hear the lamentation of their women.
Because shut up.
17. I have some questions for all spammers. Who is your favorite person in Spam? Who do you wish would post more often? Who would you consider having a romantic relationship with?
Actually, idlehands across the board.
20. This one is open to anyone to answer. Fuck, Marry, Kill, all people in Spam available as answers, who would you pick for each one?
Rusalka, idle, and Dragon Ball Zed. Not because I don't like him, but because he had the misfortune to be in a conversation with me at this very moment.
21.Would you rather fight 100 duck sized ducks, or 1 horse sized horse?
100 ducks, because the Halo announcer would be going off in my head and I'd be in little to do danger.
24. Should I really get into this again?
Only if you enjoy rough sex with no lube.
25. Spam Mod Nominees - what makes you think you'd be a good mod?
I actually take responsibility pretty seriously and already try to be a mediator in most arguments/ conflicts, but I can lay down the law when required. Also, I have generally good judgement. Gasp.
27. Jorick is Aidan Gillen, right?
He's actually Wunwun.
28. If you had to be stuck in a room with another spammer for 5 years, and then after that time was up you had to kill them, who would you pick and why? Also, don't be a bitch, no equivocation about not killing them, follow the hypothetical mandates you little shit.
I'm actually going to echo Blitzkrieg. We get along well enough and have compatible interests to make the 5 years livable, then afterwards I'm sure I'd have a good fight to the death, or he'd at least agree to dueling pistols at ten paces, like a sir.
Failing that, Drakel I can see myself getting along with and having a reasonably good chance to murdering at the end.
Or Goldmarble, for similar reasons as Blitzkrieg, plus I can see our ending duel ending up either being on a paintball field with real guns or ending up like the Hunger Games in the Rockies.
32. Question for oldfags: which of the new spammers (those who first showed up after Guildfall) do you like the most?
I haven't really noticed enough for most of the new people to have a solid opinion so far. However, if I had to pick one, I'm going to go with the controversial choice and say Joe because he earnestly seems to want to belong here and he's learning pretty quick, plus he's trying to do fun things for people to do, so that's pretty rad.
39. If you got to throw two spammers into a gladiatorial arena and make them fight to the death, who would you pick? Who do you think would win, and why? Would your answer change if they were allowed weapons and armor instead of just brawling with bare hands?
Smiral and Nargle, because this would be excellent. Both come from the American and Canadian Redneck State/Province, Nargle's a giant farm girl who plays ringette, and Smiral's a feisty fucker with a chip on her shoulder. I'm going to give Nargle the edge for physical prowess, but if weapons are involved Smiral because I'm pretty sure it's law in Texas that your baby crib needs to be made out of Mossberg 500 12 gauges.
40. Can someone explain spam humor to me?
walk the line between being respectful and an asshole, immature and mature, and rely more on wits and non-sequitur over random nonsense and you should get along fine.
41. Who are the five smartest spammers?
In no particular order, Jorick, Sherlock, Elendra, idle, and Halo.
42. Why the fuck is no-one asking me any questions?
Because you're a goat fucking sissypants.
43. Why does nobody talk about me anymore?
Because you're about as relevant as North Korea.
44. Why is Nargle mean lately?
She's a werebeaver.
45. What are wheat sharks?
An unfortunate cereal mascot that threshed children alive during quality control testing.
46. How does one breed a wheatshark?
In a bowel of milk. Yes, bowel.
47. Does no one realize that Jorick's D is actually really small and insufficient. He simply uses witty words to make up for it.
Foolish mortal, that isn't even his final form.
48. What is Nat's greatest contribution to spam?
Occasionally having something funny to say. And the random signature.
52. Why would anyone fuck with a drunken Irish man with a banhammer?
Extortion.
54. Who wants to rap battle?
Yo, yo, yo, this rap battle gonna be super tight, but nope, not the fuck tonight.
55. If the next 'Nice Guy' Killer was a spam member, who would it be and why?
Go fuck yourself.
56. When will we get to see our post counts?
When the sun rises in the west and sets in the east, when the seas go dry and mountains blow in the wind like leaves.
57. Why is Joegreenbeen so awesome? XD Why is he so hilarious too?
this better not be you, dude. I fucking vouched for you, goddamnit.
58. How the fuck do you get pi anyway?
Math.
59. Why does Drakel have the audacity to list himself above Jorick in intelligence?
Like, that's just your opinion, man.
60. Would you participate in a spam orgy? How would that go?
Sure. And about as bad as one would expect.
63. Can I ask a question?
Only if you're willing to deal with the consequences of your audacity.
64. Jorick is Benjen Stark, right?
As I said before, he's Wunwun. Maybe Shaggydog.
65. Who was your favorite flavor of the month?
I don't even know what you're trying to ask. Who we had a crush on or wanted to give a hot beef injection?
66. General spam question. What can I do to not get overlooked so damn much? I appear sometimes, but when I do, usually I'm treated the same way as when I'm not posting. As in: Not there. It's pretty annoying sometimes.
Just be a regular presence, don't be an overt asshole, say or do something memorable once in a while, and stick around for a few years.
67. If someone was to write a book with all of your Spam names in it as characters, would you read it?
Yes. And I would probably cry at it's no doubt tragic ending where 95% of the characters are dead because of their own hubris.
Bob Dylan.
4. Why does nat have so many shitty clones?
Because Nat's the most predominant person here in terms of the volume of posts. New people show up, see mostly Nat, and assume that's how shit goes. Then they emulate what they see in an attempt to fit in. The less keyboard happy of us groan as a result.
5. Why is sherlock a shitty mod?
Sherlock's exactly the kind of mod Spam needs, in general. She knows when to step in and when to let us be stupid shits.
6. Is sherlock a shitty nat clone?
Heroin, not even once.
7. Where are you why aren't you on
I'm currently visiting your mother.
8. Is spam the tumor inside RPG?
More of the liver, really.
9. Sherlock, how do you manage to be such a wonderful human being?
Brownie points only work if the person you're kissing ass to knows who you are.
11. Does anyone rememeber code guru? The non shitty mod guru.
I might have been around when he was, I can't remember.
12. What is the meaning of life, and how the hell would you know?
To crush your enemies, see them driven before you, and to hear the lamentation of their women.
Because shut up.
17. I have some questions for all spammers. Who is your favorite person in Spam? Who do you wish would post more often? Who would you consider having a romantic relationship with?
Actually, idlehands across the board.
20. This one is open to anyone to answer. Fuck, Marry, Kill, all people in Spam available as answers, who would you pick for each one?
Rusalka, idle, and Dragon Ball Zed. Not because I don't like him, but because he had the misfortune to be in a conversation with me at this very moment.
21.Would you rather fight 100 duck sized ducks, or 1 horse sized horse?
100 ducks, because the Halo announcer would be going off in my head and I'd be in little to do danger.
24. Should I really get into this again?
Only if you enjoy rough sex with no lube.
25. Spam Mod Nominees - what makes you think you'd be a good mod?
I actually take responsibility pretty seriously and already try to be a mediator in most arguments/ conflicts, but I can lay down the law when required. Also, I have generally good judgement. Gasp.
27. Jorick is Aidan Gillen, right?
He's actually Wunwun.
28. If you had to be stuck in a room with another spammer for 5 years, and then after that time was up you had to kill them, who would you pick and why? Also, don't be a bitch, no equivocation about not killing them, follow the hypothetical mandates you little shit.
I'm actually going to echo Blitzkrieg. We get along well enough and have compatible interests to make the 5 years livable, then afterwards I'm sure I'd have a good fight to the death, or he'd at least agree to dueling pistols at ten paces, like a sir.
Failing that, Drakel I can see myself getting along with and having a reasonably good chance to murdering at the end.
Or Goldmarble, for similar reasons as Blitzkrieg, plus I can see our ending duel ending up either being on a paintball field with real guns or ending up like the Hunger Games in the Rockies.
32. Question for oldfags: which of the new spammers (those who first showed up after Guildfall) do you like the most?
I haven't really noticed enough for most of the new people to have a solid opinion so far. However, if I had to pick one, I'm going to go with the controversial choice and say Joe because he earnestly seems to want to belong here and he's learning pretty quick, plus he's trying to do fun things for people to do, so that's pretty rad.
39. If you got to throw two spammers into a gladiatorial arena and make them fight to the death, who would you pick? Who do you think would win, and why? Would your answer change if they were allowed weapons and armor instead of just brawling with bare hands?
Smiral and Nargle, because this would be excellent. Both come from the American and Canadian Redneck State/Province, Nargle's a giant farm girl who plays ringette, and Smiral's a feisty fucker with a chip on her shoulder. I'm going to give Nargle the edge for physical prowess, but if weapons are involved Smiral because I'm pretty sure it's law in Texas that your baby crib needs to be made out of Mossberg 500 12 gauges.
40. Can someone explain spam humor to me?
walk the line between being respectful and an asshole, immature and mature, and rely more on wits and non-sequitur over random nonsense and you should get along fine.
41. Who are the five smartest spammers?
In no particular order, Jorick, Sherlock, Elendra, idle, and Halo.
42. Why the fuck is no-one asking me any questions?
Because you're a goat fucking sissypants.
43. Why does nobody talk about me anymore?
Because you're about as relevant as North Korea.
44. Why is Nargle mean lately?
She's a werebeaver.
45. What are wheat sharks?
An unfortunate cereal mascot that threshed children alive during quality control testing.
46. How does one breed a wheatshark?
In a bowel of milk. Yes, bowel.
47. Does no one realize that Jorick's D is actually really small and insufficient. He simply uses witty words to make up for it.
Foolish mortal, that isn't even his final form.
48. What is Nat's greatest contribution to spam?
Occasionally having something funny to say. And the random signature.
52. Why would anyone fuck with a drunken Irish man with a banhammer?
Extortion.
54. Who wants to rap battle?
Yo, yo, yo, this rap battle gonna be super tight, but nope, not the fuck tonight.
55. If the next 'Nice Guy' Killer was a spam member, who would it be and why?
Go fuck yourself.
56. When will we get to see our post counts?
When the sun rises in the west and sets in the east, when the seas go dry and mountains blow in the wind like leaves.
57. Why is Joegreenbeen so awesome? XD Why is he so hilarious too?
this better not be you, dude. I fucking vouched for you, goddamnit.
58. How the fuck do you get pi anyway?
Math.
59. Why does Drakel have the audacity to list himself above Jorick in intelligence?
Like, that's just your opinion, man.
60. Would you participate in a spam orgy? How would that go?
Sure. And about as bad as one would expect.
63. Can I ask a question?
Only if you're willing to deal with the consequences of your audacity.
64. Jorick is Benjen Stark, right?
As I said before, he's Wunwun. Maybe Shaggydog.
65. Who was your favorite flavor of the month?
I don't even know what you're trying to ask. Who we had a crush on or wanted to give a hot beef injection?
66. General spam question. What can I do to not get overlooked so damn much? I appear sometimes, but when I do, usually I'm treated the same way as when I'm not posting. As in: Not there. It's pretty annoying sometimes.
Just be a regular presence, don't be an overt asshole, say or do something memorable once in a while, and stick around for a few years.
67. If someone was to write a book with all of your Spam names in it as characters, would you read it?
Yes. And I would probably cry at it's no doubt tragic ending where 95% of the characters are dead because of their own hubris.
Halo said
Cue the mighty lumberjack fury.Old fashioned in that way you refuse to physically abuse women, but enjoy the real psychological stuff - misogynistically reduce them to stereotypes and so participate in good ol'-fashioned society-wide systematic abuse of women? Thumbs up, bro.Okay, yeah, I'm unnecessarily busting your balls here, but srsly, you're being an ass to Nargle here. The educational documentary "Shrek" taught me that dragons do occasionally marry asses, but that doesn't mean you must emulate them.
That dragon is going to be so pissed when she realizes Donkey ain't packing enough for a woman of her majestic stature.
Giygas said
How come nobody knows who I am even though I've been here for half a year
Because the big names have been here since 2008-2010.
Hell, I only started getting recognition a few months ago and I've been here since January 2012. You still have that new car smell.
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