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Recent Statuses

4 yrs ago
Current So, as an American, what do I do when I need to choose between illegal immigration to Canada and dying in a civil war?
5 yrs ago
Woo! Got the prick!
8 yrs ago
When you try to write an essay on climate change but it just degrades into angry rambling halfway through.
5 likes
8 yrs ago
Conquer it, conquer the bread.
2 likes
8 yrs ago
Up until today I've never had any trouble with my EUIV Japan games. Today I got stomped five times in a row before even uniting the country.
2 likes

Bio

I'm a weeaboo communist. Are you surprised?

EDIT: You probably are now, but I'm not going to tell you why you wouldn't have been like two years ago. You get to agonize over that yourself.

Most Recent Posts

The battle of Sol begins!
Galactic Announcement
"Due to the current situation, the Lakfakalle Cooperative Federation believes that such a body must be established. If the plan goes through, we fully agree to assist in the creation of intergalactic laws and the enforcement thereof. Due to the recent occurrences in Equestrian space, combined with the extra-universal threat, the proposed body should be created as quickly as possible, preferably with a meeting location and/or base. We suggest that such a base be kept well out of areas with low space-time integrity due to the invasion, ruling out Triarius, Lakfakalle, and Equiis. Perhaps an underdeveloped system such as Nikolien."

Sol System, Pluto
A tiny flash of light appeared above Pluto, and a vessel surrounded with a rainbow-colored space time bubble emerged from it. The bubble faded away to reveal a small scout ship, which quickly fired a communications probe through the brilliant blue rift. After a few short moments, a transparent blue circle appeared just behind the scout ship, as large as Pluto itself. Thousands upon thousands of ships exited the portal, causing almost splash-like disturbances across it's surface. After the last ship entered the system, ten gigantic missiles emerged from the portal. They dwarfed the frigates of the fleet, and made a beeline for the blue-green result of magical and scientific terraforming that was Pluto. As they impacted, mushroom clouds appeared on the surface of Pluto, so large that the entire invasion fleet could be contained in a single one.

Red beams of energy were fired out of every ship in the fleet, the combined power of them along with the giant missiles completely destroying the dwarf planet. Nothing more than a few asteroids remained of it, a sight eerily similar to that of Earth's destruction. The turreted beams cannons of the vessels returned to their forward-facing state as their engines flared red, complimenting the sickly green of each ship's hull. A force specifically designed to be unstoppable, and unstoppable it was. Not once had an Imperial invasion fleet been defeated, especially not one from Terra. The fleet's commander watched from the bridge of his white-hulled command ship, wondering just why his illustrious fleet had been sent to deal with a single galaxy. Nevertheless, he was loyal till the end and honor-bound to carry out his orders, even though they seemed illogical.

"All ships, ahead 0.2c. Recycle deflector shields and recharge positron cannons. This system is inhabited only by a primitive interplanetary civilization, destroy the homeworld, the rest falls immediately. We will waste no time on gas collection platforms or colonies, we head directly for the third planet." He said into his microphone, his monotone voice showing complete boredom at the task. After all, his fleet should be putting down intergalactic rebellions, not conquering a singe galaxy inhabited by pitiful and clueless creatures.

Sol System, Asteroid Belt
Fairlan felt a surge of information from the rest of the Delphan Collective as they hastily reconnected him, giving no respect to the fact that he was trying to sleep. While they stated they would do so a long time ago, he knew it was purely to get others to trust him. He and Emily knew that, they weren't willing to let the secrets they still held into the hands of one who would be tempted to give them away (though they had given him limited vision of the paths the future could take). As such, he never expected to feel the strange enlightenment of the Collective. Interestingly, he could not hear the thoughts of anyone else, only receive directed messages. It seems the situation was not so terrible that they would resort to allowing him full connection. It was a single second before he was disconnected, but the intellects of a billion Delphans had imprinted just one word into his mind that resonated like a ceremonial gong in an Abh temple.

Imperials

He jumped out of bed and threw open the door to his quarters using his natural psychic powers. Bolting out of the room as face as his legs could carry him, he picked up a wireless microphone from an intercom console. Switching from one console's wireless relay to another as he ran, the microphone was hastily set for a shipwide broadcast by Fairlan.

"All crew, battlestations!" He yelled, holding the microphone with one hand and throwing on his bulletproof combat vest. He would have put on his armor, but there was no time and little purpose. "Launch Pelias! Gunnery crews, prepare for sustained streamer and shield breaker fire! Switch shield breakers to type twelve focusing, prepare to release targeting probes!"

As the crew carried out his commands, he took a shortcut to the bridge through the zero-g hangar, Pelia fighters taking off with electromagnetic pulses all around him. Finally reaching the bridge, he floated up to the command tower. Emily got out of the Captain's chair and into the XO's chair, allowing Fairlan to sit down in his own chair. The rest of the bridge crew frantically typed on their keyboards and yelled into their microphones, relaying orders and giving commands to the system themselves. Fairlan threw his microphone off the tower, leaving it to float until the battle was over. He picked up the inter-ship communications microphone from his chair and spoke into it after making sure it was set for a system wide broadcast.

"This is Admiral Fairlan Miklan of the Imperial Star Forces, Lakfakalle Cooperative Federation! Extra-universal forces have arrived in this system, all Star Forces warships are ordered to launch fighters and take point in front of the Equestrian fleet! Position all turreted weapons forwards and charge Variable Pulse Lances to maximum strength! Equestrian vessels are requested to fall in with Star Forces warships and prepare for long-range bombardment of approaching enemy fleet!"

Pelia fighters flooded out of the Lakfakalle warships, and their turrets returned to forward positions. They fell into formation, and Fairlan couldn't help but smile at how the fleet looked from the bridge. All the ships were in a horizontal formation, turrets facing forwards with the Variable Pulse Lances glowing blue while charging. The ships proudly flew towards the Equestrian fleet, ready to join them in battle.

Just like in the propaganda.

The warships moved in front of the Equestrian fleet, their broadside weapons unlocking and emerging from the hull. They all swiveled to face forwards, taking advantage of their staggered placement. The moment the enemy fleet came within their effective aiming range, their ships would be ripped to shreds by shield breaker and antiproton fire.

"Open torpedo tubes!" Yelled Fairlan

"Torpedo tubes open, Admiral!" Responded the weapon officer

"All ships, fire torpedoes!"

Every Lakfakalle warship let loose a barrage of torpedoes, streaking towards the enemy ships while leaving behind blue trails of plasma. The fighters and warships waited patiently for the Equestrians to respond, monitoring the torpedoes and preparing to take manual control of them in order to engage evasive maneuvers. Seeing the gigantic enemy fleet on the radar, every crew member was filled with a sense of dread. Could they really win this battle like Fairlan had said? Could even their ships stand up against such a large fleet?
WilsonTurner said
I can't stand to be ganged up on by a group of people. I can deal with constructive critism if only a couple people do it. I ask, "What should I change?" and I get a bunch of sarcastic asshole-replies in return, and essentially just someone beating me with a stick.If you want me to change, send a PM and I'll change based on a discussion. Not a gang-up against one kid.


You stated that you were completely invincible, a PM would be a waste of time because everyone would be sending you a separate one about it, thus causing the same outcome.

Also, Duck has said he just doesn't give a shit about UE anymore. I can't roleplay two opposing sides, so if anyone is willing to play as the Empire of America, then speak up.
That OP is as long as my shorter posts, and I'm on the lower end of the quality scale.

This... this hurts. Physically. When you can make me feel physical pain, you know your writing needs some serious work.
Senor Herp said
Eh. 42,000 odd characters with spaces, 35,000 without. I'm sure there's been bigger. It's fiiiiine. IT'S FIIIIIIIINE.


That's about 33,000 more characters than my longest post. I'm gonna have to step up my game.

Let's see... I think this word will do.

Aww... not enough room.
duck55223 said
I know I cam be beatenYour getting mad at me for not having the right info.


Well, when are you going to be beat-

Oh. Forgot about the Collective wars. Accusations dropped.
TehAlphaGamer said
Dude you need to admit that your troops and ships and whatever are juiced as shit and you need to tone it down a little.Me fighting you IC isn't a matter of a balanced, enjoyable fight.Me fighting you is an unbalanced curbstomp battle where it's less about me even having a fighting chance of winning and more about survival, and it's not like Sazkarjhia is using sticks and stones, some of this stuff is pretty powerful.


Yeah, Duck, you really gotta recognize that you can be beaten.
Sandy Shores
Yuuki looked at Balsamo, thinking carefully while she spoke.

"Tell your troops to attack in ten hours. Antarctic soldiers can be there at the same time if we bring them in via aircraft." She began to pace around the room. "You know, I've been thinking about using Protocol 581. When we made contact with the Commonwealth, we realized how alien our technology seems. We prepared a viable invasion protocol for attacking America, we planned to use exclusively plasma aircraft, use cityspeak, and send in all ground troops with the pale skin of Caucasian city dwellers wearing these."

She held up two incredibly detailed fake ears, elongated and apparently made to fit in a way that would make them stick out horizontally. While they looked like something out of a LARPing session, they would definitely look realistic if actually worn.

"Call them silly all you want, but it would take a dissection to figure out that these aren't actual ears. Anyone without the pale skin would wear normal face-concealing combat gear, to give the impression that there are multiple species working together. The Empire would think aliens were attacking, and that means they would think us Antarcticans have the ability to travel between the stars. The idea that aliens were working with rebels for ideological reasons would become accepted, because they would have no other explanation. If you're with us on this, then I'll order the attack preparations. If not, I'll order a conventional attack whenever you want. You know, you could even go so far as to tell this radio station of yours to 'inform' the protesters of your 'alien allies'. Of course, lying to your own people to make them attack is probably not the most ethical thing to do. Just remember, whatever choice you make, we'll support it."

Suddenly, an Antarctican air force officer ran into the room.

"Drone squadrons QP-01 through QP-010 have begun attacks on Fort Irwin, Commander!"

"Ah. Yes. I have taken the liberty of dispatching a flight of aircraft to a military base in California, following Protocol 581. No matter your decision, the attack should make the Empire believe California to be the main target. I do hope you do not find this rash, our strategists believe it is the best course of action. I was just about to inform you."

Fort Irwin, California
AA fire lit up the sky over Fort Irwin, targeting strange aircraft performing extremely high-g maneuvers physically impossible for a normal aircraft above the base. They were firing railgun shells and high-power lasers towards the base, hitting the defenses with great precision. The aircraft looked like something right out of pulp sci-fi, flying saucers surrounded in a shield of blue plasma. A transmission was sent from one of the craft, not only to the base, but to the whole area.

The pale face of the speaker appeared, with long and pointy ears sticking out horizontally. He looked somewhat close to a human, but the words didn't seem human.

"Yoiio lá männisokoriin. Yoiio jiiěfànnii männisokoriin." He said. He continued on, saying the very next word slowly, but still butchering the pronunciation. "So-cheel-ee-zim. So-cheel-ee-zim yoio. jiiěfànnii... ah-mer-ee-chah.
The Great Nahman Jayden said
Poor, poor OOC thread. On a similar note, no matter how good your propaganda is, I doubt people in countries you just invaded are going to be like, "Hey, they attacked us but I here the roads are really good!"


To be fair, that is how ancient Persia kept their empire together.
darkwolf687 said
Uh, keyguy, there are no collective ships. They left after they laid down a space mine field of sorts, set up a handful of automated defences and flooded several areas of the system with small sized pieces of scrap (Since the Imperial Ships will be phasing in from another universe, the idea was many would end up entering in the same zone as the scrap, causing massive damage to chunks of their fleet and weakening them, then the mines will close in and the turrets will open fire. Once the Imperial fleet has been weakened from these defences and the Sol systems populations defences as well as the Equestrian forces, the Collective would wait for the right time, if any, to jump in with fresh and undamaged ships and deliver a knockout blow.)


Ah, sorry.

Also, it can be assumed that the LCF does not know the nightlords are there.
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