Avatar of POOHEAD189

Status

Recent Statuses

8 hrs ago
Current Finally home and will post for my partners asap!
1 like
1 day ago
I started ATLA late, around Covid. But I love the first series and think TLoK is pretty good despite some problems
4 likes
2 days ago
I never notice someone's post count until I see (ignore post count) and then I totally look at it, out of habit and curiosity.
8 likes
8 days ago
Reading Ravenor from 40k right now!
2 likes
8 days ago
I believe in the skydaddy cult
4 likes

Bio






About Me








Name: Ben
Username: The one and only. Dare I say?
Age: 33
Ethnicity: Mixed
Sex: Male
Religion: Christian (Nondenominational)
Languages: English, Japanese (Semi-fluent & learning), I also know some Scots Gaelic, Quenyan (Elvish), and Miccosukee (My tribal tongue)
Relationship Status: Single (Though generally unavailable unless I find I really enjoy someone).






Current Projects/Freelance work

  • I am a voice talent and script writer for Faerun History
  • I have a much smaller personal Youtube channel that I use to make videos on various subjects. Only been making videos for 2 years, but it's growing!
  • I'm the host of a Science Fiction & Fantasy Podcast where I interview authors of the genre.




Interests (Includes but is not limited to)

  • Writing/Reading (Love writing and I own too many books)
  • Video Games (Been a gamer for close to 23 years now)
  • Working Out/Martial Arts (Wing Chun/Oyama Karate mostly. Some historical swordplay as well.)
  • History (Military History is my specialty)
  • Zoology
  • Art (Mostly Illustrations. Used to be good. Am picking it back up)
  • Voice Acting/Singing
  • Tabletop Gaming (Started late in the game. Been at it for 3 years. I was the kid who bought the monster manuals and D&D books just for the lore for the longest time. I've played 3.5e, 5e, Star Wars D20, Edge of the Empire, PF, and PF2.)
  • Weaponry of all kinds
  • Anime (mostly action/shonen. DBZ & YYH being my favorites)
  • Movies (Action/War/Drama films being my go-to)
  • Music (Rock of all kinds, as well as historical folk songs, sea shanties, pub songs, a bit of classical music, etc)
  • Guitar (am learning to play, but being left handed makes it challenging)
  • There's more but if you care enough you can PM me :P




Roleplay F.A.Q.

  • Fantasy, Sci Fi, and Historical are my genres. Fantasy being my favorite and Sci Fi/Historical being close seconds.
  • Advanced / Nation / 1x1 / Casual (only in certain circumstances)
  • I generally write at the 'Advanced Level' meaning 4+ Paragraphs with good grammar.
  • I am usually busy with many projects and RPs, but if you wish to do a 1x1 with me, you'll need to present your case. Those I already do it with have my trust as a Roleplayer.
  • I love many, many fictional universes so me trying to list them all is an effort in futility!






Me

Most Recent Posts

"Ah yes, the something something clause inducted by Emperor Sigismund the IV." Malcador remarked sagely, clearly poking fun at Emmaline, but not too surprised when she nodded enthusiastically, buying every word. The celestial mage rolled his eyes, and took Emmaline by the arm to lead her aside.

"What?" Emmaline asked, trying to peek over his shoulder at the chest.

"Even if we help them, they aren't going to give us the gold!" He whispered to her, trying to shake her back into reality. Sigmar, the dwarfs from Zhufbar had been less enthralled when they saw gold. There was an insanity to her eyes that unnerved him. It seemed to flow in one our and out the other, and he decided to speak slowly: "Emma, that gold is meant for the Emperor. Not. Us... We. Cannot. Have. It."

"I know that!" She protested, a bit too loudly. Her next words were softer, embarrassed. "I know that..."

"They might be rewarded if they help, right?" Humper asked Clodfoot, and Malcador almost fell over as the gold lust burst back into Emmaline's face like the sun. Despite how crazy she seemed, Emmaline Von Morgantsern had an odd way of titillating Malcador at every turn. It looked just like how she might look if... He let the thought go. If they were smart they would take these 3 sacks of gold and go, but there was no stopping her now. If he dragged her out of there, she very well might be mad at him for a week. It was better than the both of them being dead, but somehow he could not quite bring himself to do it.

He must have been as crazy as her. He turned to the halflings, who watched expectantly.

"We'll help," Malcador said, and Emmaline gave out a squeal and a jump. Malcador sighed. "The key word is help, herr halflings. I don't intend for my lady friend or myself to be harmed. Once we get there, you'll also personally commend us to the Duchess Elize von Skaag, or whatever official you're to meet. Do we have a deal?"
Malcador's vices leaned more towards the flesh than avarice, but he still had to agree with Emmaline with a long, low whistle. "You halflings weren't kidding."

"Who are they!?" The guard with the blunderbuss demanded, raising the firearm. The movement nearly pitched him over, and Malcador was certain his unsteadiness would discharge the gun, but by the grace of the gods the halfling caught himself. The halfling guard that led them into the room raised his hand to calm his fellow.

"Easy, Humper! They're with me!"

Maclador burst out laughing. He did not mean to, but it erupted out of him with the force of a flood. He couldn't keep ahold of Clodfoot's feet and dropped him, which caused Clodfoot's prone form to knock into the guard, who reeled back and nearly fell to the floor. As Malcador wheezed, he bade Emmaline close the door. She did so, locking it tighly for good measure. The myriad of complaints that rose up were silenced after Mal caught his breathe, holding up two hands to placate them. "My apologies, good mootlanders. I don't know what came over me."

"You better make sure he wasn't bruised!"

"He's fine, he's fine. In fact, it's because we helped you that he's fine and not chopped to bits. I also warned you about the assassin, did I not?" Malcador reminded them.

"What assassin!?" Humper asked excitedly, and Malcador and Emmaline ducked as he swung the gun again.

"I don't know, yet! But they're like as not to strike tomorrow! I only know what I heard, now please give us s bit of gold as the reward you promised, and we'll be out of your hair."

"Help me put him on the bed." The guard told Malcador, and reluctantly the debonair mage helped him do just that, making certain to be gentle this time. Clodfoot was not man, but he was heavy for a halfling. Luckily, the both of them did it with relative ease. Once they did so, the halfling fixed his pillow, set it under him, and gave a sigh. "Okay... Humper, give them a couple of sacks."

Malcador looked away, vainly trying to hold off the laughter. Emmaline placed a hand on his mouth to keep it from bursting out as Humper grabbed a few coin purses.
"What do you call the transport ships of this era?" Calliope asked, emphasizing every syllable so Beren might understand her. He tried to reply back with equal consideration as they strode through the thick brush. Beren had acquired a small, chopping sword from one of the dead men, and chopped away the clinging vines every few feet. It appeared even the skeleton crew that had been left to tend the boats had been slaughtered, though from what, it was difficult to say. Beren did not try and decipher the mystery, merely wishing to get out of there as soon as possible. The fact the most dangerous denizen of this accursed place was now two strides behind him, chatting with him, was a fact not lost on the young man.

"It... depends." He said, or at least he hoped he found the right word for his meaning. "We came on a Dromon, but there are various types of ships called a dhow, and a Baghlah is the largest of these."

"Explain this Dromon to me." She commanded, as if Calliope were speaking to a subject of a newly founded kingdom. Beren had to keep in mind this was likely exceedingly polite to her, though she had been uncharacteristically sweet in the cave. He needed to keep an eye out for that.

"It's a large ship with 3 flaps-" He did not know the Xerubian term for 'sail.' "Many strips, oars! Many oars to speed its way. A fist at its fore to hit other ships, with a full deck of many men. It is a long structure."

"What material is it made of?" She inquired. A strange question, but Beren answered politely.

"Wood?" He asked, glancing at her curiously. She merely accepted the answer, and he was glad he had guessed her question correctly, but it begged the question what else a seafaring vessel might be constructed out of. "With no crew left, I think we'll have to make do with a rowboat. There's another island half a day's travel here, like I said, and from there we can make it north to Ubtal in a matter of a week."

"Come now, why travel a week on the ocean in a dingy, fishing for food and at the mercy of storms. Why not simply ask a favor of me? I am a goddess, I am not going to sleep under the open sky on such a small vessel. You do know if you die, I am not-..." Her words trailed away, which he did not take as a good sign. Suddenly he felt a surge of danger, as if the air had changed, and he half expected a knife in his back, or something far more sorcerous. Instead, he heard a softer tone. "Actually Beren, I have a suggestion that would work out for the both of us."

The warrior monk turned, only to find Calliope far closer to him than her voice had suggested. Her right hand brushed his arm, her left reaching up to fix the length of his cloak around his neck. "I know of a place very close to here, unless I miss my guess." She remarked, her voice sonorous, even husky. "There is a gateway there, that leads us northward, likely far closer to this Ubtal."

Beren swallowed, keeping a stern countenance on the outside, but unable to help notice how lovely she was. Finally, he managed to find his tongue. "Why did you not mention this earlier?"

"I simply hadn't thought of it," she said innocently, fluttering her dark lashes. "Being petrified for thousands of years can do much to one's mind, but things are slowly returning to me."

He did not know if he believed her explanation, but he did believe in the gateway. Still, he could not help but feel this was some trick. He opened his mouth to speak, only for the ground to reverberate from the loud snarl of a massive, spotted jungle cat emerging from the ferns just three paces away. It had moved as silent as death. Beren was good with beasts, but they were in its territory, and he lifted his staff to keep both it and himself between the huge panther and Calliope, his sense of chivalry overriding his logic for the briefest moment.

"Let's back away," Beren suggested. He had yet to notice Calliope's irritated visage glaring at the cat for ruining the bait she had set. The feline swiped at the staff with paws the size of plates, batting it to the side before emitting another threatening growl. Beren was ready to wrestle this thing, but Calliope merely crossed her arms under her chest, breathed in, and snarled back.

The sound that erupted from her lips was thrice the strength of the jungle cat's growl, so powerful the ferns and foliage swayed and shuddered. The muscled beast's eyes went comically wide, and it leaped back in surprise and fear before scurrying away like a street cat, its great paws sending gobs of dirt flying in its haste to escape. Beren did not blame the cat, having jumped himself from fright, and only his fingers being locked had kept the staff in his grip.

"Now then, where were we?" Calliope asked, the sweet facade gone. She looked at Beren expectantly. "Shall we take my suggestion?"

"Yeah, sure, of course." He said breathlessly.
Malcador heard her scream his name just as he was punched in the face.

He truly had not expected it. It was a brawl, sure, but he had kept as close to the wall as possible until he verified he could make a go at Emmaline, yet as soon as he stepped one foot out, a fist came out of the crowd and hit him square in the face. It was only by the endless grace of the gods his nose had not shattered, yet he still lamented it. Not the pain, but the fact his face was the money maker! He was a dashing man, and prized his looks highly.

Malcador staggered back, blinking away the bright light that had exploded in his vision. He hit the wall again, and if it wasn't for another scream from Emmaline, he might have checked out then and there. He was averse to fist fighting, trying to avoid it at all costs. Yet he had been in two tavern brawls before, and one poorly executed schoolyard fist fight. It had been unfortunate all 3 times, but they gave him a small sense of how to dodge and how to hit if need be. He pushed off the wall again after shaking his head and fixing his hair, dodging through the crowd and ducking under the next fist that flew his way. He struck out in the direction this fist came from, and heard a satisfying groan of pain. He spied Emmaline on the stairway, and rushed forward until he was blocked by the stumbling body of a duelist, his face bloodied. Malcador cried out, shoving the stammered man away, inadvertently unsheathing his rapier from his belt. He looked at the sword newly gripped in his hands, and shrugged to himself. He lifted it and slipped past a gaggle of drunkards in a whirlwind of fists and another tavern wench breaking a bottle of watered down mead over a dwarf's head. At last Malcador leaped over a newly fallen chair and made it to the stairway.

"Clodfoot!" He cried dramatically, rapier raised. "Unhand her!"

The tall halfling turned, an oxymoron if there ever was one, but it was true. Clodfoot looked both angered and perplexed. "Who might you be!?"

"I am the one who sent the note." He told him, only to nearly lose his step as one of the halfling body guards had been tossed his way like a sack of grain. Malcador took three steps up, and the mootlander hit the stairs with a disgusting, weighty thump. All three of them winced for a moment.

"You!? Who in Ranald's taint are you, and why do you wish to kill me!?"

"I don't wish to kill you, you fool! I bought the drinks and sent the note because someone else does, now unhand this poor woman!" Malcador ordered. Clodfoot's face was unreadable save for the mild effort of thinking over the situation. He looked at Emmaline, and then back at Malcador. "Very well then, I believe you. But perhaps I'll buy this girl's services in more ways than one." He smiled lasciviously.

Emmaline slapped the halfling, who whirled on her. Malcador had seen enough, poking the rapier's rigid blade between the halfling's legs and pivoting the angle, tripping him up. Clodfoot squealed an undignified squeal, and plummeted down the stairs, nearly taking Emmaline with him. It was her turn to squeal, but Malcador dropped the rapier and caught her before she could join the bugger in a heap at the bottom. The two mystics smiled at one another, but before they could kiss, the last halfling bodyguard had come to find his motionless, knocked out brethren. He looked between them and the two students.

"I suggest you take your master back to the mootland. Reikland is a silly place." Malcador told him, still keeping his aristocratic air of authority.
Malcador grinned at Emmaline, still amused at the whole affair. "She seems nice," he told her as the two tried to maneuver through the press of the bawdy crowd. A halfling atop an awning played an accordion as two tavern wenches danced beneath him, giving him a marvelous view of their cleavage, while three dwarfs and one very drunk reikland man compared tattoos and scars just beside an overturned cart of grain.

"She's been accused of many things, but nice is a rare one." Emmaline laughed, and the two managed to fanagle their way down two more streets, keeping their coin-purses close and their eyes peeled. Malcador had heard of the establishment, but he had never been. There was always a tavern that was either a bit more high class or a bit cheaper to visit. Yet it was a hard one to miss, with a headless rooster emblazoned on the sign just outside of the rickety steps leading into the wide open front doors.

Emmaline eagerly began to make her way to the entrance, but Malcador caught her wrist gently. She glanced at him, curious. He drew closer, whispering in her ear. "We need to be careful, we don't know who's watching Clodfoot now, and I also think we should tell him from a discreet note. I don't think it's good for even him to see our faces."

"Not if we can help it, at least." She agreed wholeheartedly, and squeezed his hand. Hands together, they weaved their way into the tavern. Immediately the smell of alcohol and sizzling meat mingled with a faint air of sweat, and Malcador's mind went from carefully laid plans to food, drink, and Emmaline Von Morganstern. He simply wanted to get the whole ordeal over with and have a pint and some tilean stromboli he'd heard the taverns now sold. However, they had to complete the matter at hand, and he peeled his eyes around for any halflings they might see. Emmaline did the same, but lacking Malcador's height, she compromised by poking her head under raised arms of toasts and peeks through the crowd.

Finally, Emmaline's search bore fruit, telling Malcador they were at the far left table before both of them heading for kegs. They both grabbed a pint and shimmied between two of the kegs, Emmaline raising the mug to her lips before Malcador stopped her. She pouted, and when he gave her an amused look, she huffed. "So, what's the plan?"

Malcador glanced at the crowd. "We use our talents together," he said nonchalantly. "You've got the ring, and you're good at acting, right?"

She nodded, her ponytail bobbing up and down.

"I'll divine when you should go, so fortune favors you, fraulien. Then you take a pan of drinks to their table, act like you're a serving wench, conspicuously leave a note that tells him he is in danger and from whom, I'll call you over for another drink, and then we can go enjoy our night." Malcador gave a wink at the end, and Emmaline took a sip at that, though her blue eyes glinted with mischief.
He tried to find a way out, hitting the wall that led up an inverted slope. The only exit was hundreds of meters into the air, and while he vainly tried to begin his climb, he only made to just above twice his height before he embarrassingly lost his hold. He fell and caught himself well enough, his training keeping him from falling into a heap, and it was only then he realized she was not pursuing him. That did not make sense to him. He had read what manuscripts remained of Calliope the Black Star, though scholars argued over her naming conventions. Many had called her Callypsa the Black Serpent, or Queen Kallos the Abyss. To most laymen, they would not have her in their cultural memory, save old curses or rituals by fires they did without thought of their origins. Beren hardly knew anything about her, because there was very little to know. All he knew was that she was either a powerful witch or a dark goddess, and that she preyed on mortal men's souls and devoured those that displeased her.

You know, the usual from legends of that era.

He poked his head over a broken piece of ground to see if she had done anything, but sure enough, she had remained where she was, arms crossed and raising an impatient eyebrow.

"I am used to my servants being frightened, but I have to ask if you are done." She said magnanimously, at least that's what he believed the gist of her statement was.

No gouts of black flame or rocks falling atop his head. Well, whatever Beren was, he wasn't a coward or a liar, at least not when it counted. He took a deep breathe, and steeling himself, he stepped around the stone and faced her. "I'm not a cultist." He admitted. "As I said, I'm just a humble scholar."

To his sincere surprise, she did not scream or turn into a giant serpent and devour him, or even looked offended. She gave a very human groan of annoyance, and muttered a word he had read once long ago that seemed to be a colloquial term for excrement. She placed two hands to her pretty face. He felt bad for interrupting her self pity, but he did add: "Uh, sorry. But uh, kill me if you're going to. I got nowhere else to go."

"I can't, you fool!" She suddenly cried, causing him to jump. Her majesty and dangerous nature was still there, but there was an air of petulance about her. He supposed most deities were just that, in the sagas. "I am bound to you! Saitar knows why I was awoken by you instead of someone I could work with, or would work for me, better yet."

Beren crossed his muscled arms, his handsome face incredulous. "Bound?" He echoed.



"Have you not read the Namtar Cycle? The prophecies and placement of the cosmos?"

"No..." He said slowly. "Well, yes, but out of the thirty six books, only some of book seven and twelve remain, at least we think those were their placements. Even then we know very little." He found he was growing slightly more comfortable, if only just. His thirst for lore was overcoming a bit of his incredulous fear at the absurdity of this meeting.

"Very well, I suppose I shall educate you." She declared with reluctance, and stepped down from the small height to stand before him. To Beren, she was a head shorter than him, though she stood as if she bore the weight and strength of a gigante.



"I have been awoken by you, yes? This means I am now bound to you for a period of thirteen years, or thirteen favors. Whichever runs out first, and I must remain...resolute in such... service..." It left her lips in a hiss. "The pact cannot be undone. The prophecies also say-" She drew in breath to speak, but paused for a long moment. Her poise was replaced with a sweet smile. "That it is an honor to serve."



Beren scratched the stubble on his chin, pondering. He believed he was catching on. "What happens if you don't give the favors, or stick to the time?"

She shrugged dramatically. "Oh you know how it is! A grim fate..." She lamented, slicing a hand across her throat. It was a simple gesture, one made less inconspicuous as her head leaped from her shoulders the moment the hand movement had been performed. It spun in a flip before landing in her waiting hands. A cry burst from Beren's mouth and he backpedaled, nearly falling over the stone he had hid behind. The headless sorceress continued as normal, only now her voice came from chest level as her amputated head continued to speak. "The powers that be will see to it I am cursed to a fate worse than death or imprisonment."

His heart thundering in his chest, he grabbed at his bare chest, eyes as wide as saucers. "You don't need a head!?"

"Well," she purred, lifting her disembodied head and placing it back atop her neck. Her eyes closed, she answered: "I can do so if I wish, but if someone else were to behead me, that would be a problem."

"Can you- no." He had started, but he immediately stopped the thought. Asking her if she could remove his head was not a question he wanted answered. He let himself calm down, before taking stock. "Okay so... the favors of a goddess." He reasoned, pursing his lips. Glancing upwards, he said. "Well, I can't ask a favor of you without us getting out of here. Bet you can't even do that, even if I asked." Beren gave a chuckle.

Calliope cackled, the cruel sound echoing across the walls of the dark chasm. "You think I am falling for that? You'll have to spend a favor for you to get out of here, boy!"

Beren sighed, kicking a rock. Her laughter still echoed as he spoke. "You're right. I was just hoping I didn't have to spend one to just see the old, red sun again."

Her laughter abruptly stopped. "Old red sun!? How long was I-..." She snapped her fingers, and the two of them were launched skywards, what looked to Beren like shadowy wraiths plummeting out of their feet, rocketing the two of them up and out of the chasm at a hundred meters per second. In three heartbeats, Beren landed on the procession walkway in a rough roll as Calliope looked up at the sky, squinting. Beren was just rolling over when she spun on him in a rage, eyes blazing. It seemed she had discovered the sun was quite yellow and healthy. His smug expression, chin resting on his hand, made it even worse.

"Oh very clever, boy! See if I remain charitable to you after that little stunt."

"You were going to be charitable?" He asked innocently, fluttering his lashes. He decided not to push it, however. He got to his feet and stretched his neck. She glared daggers at him, but there was a small bit of respect in her eyes now, if only the barest hint. "It's been twenty five hundred years, give or take a century, since you've walked the world. If we're going to be bound, we might as well not hate one another." He told her, and extended his hand. She curled her lips in distaste and confusion.

"Is this some sort of ritual?" She asked.

"It's a sign of agreement. You grab my hand, and we shake them for a brief moment." He explained.

It took her many long moments, but she acquiesced. "Very well..." Calliope remarked. Her grip was surprisingly strong. Once they let go, he decided to grant her a small bow.

"It is my honor to meet you."

"Yes, it is." She agreed. "Perhaps it will not be so unpleasant learning of this new world."

"You'll find you've effected it more than you think. We still have words that reference you." He told her, and then spoke without thinking. "-like Callypgian!" He tried not to curse, feeling like an idiot for even saying it.

"What does that mean?" She inquired, amused. His eyes went to her hips, then back to her own eyes. He fidgeted with his thumbs.

"It means beautiful."
Malcador clutched the torc for a brief moment as if it were a symbol of holy Sigmar, before he stuffed it into his pocket. Malcador sighed to calm his nerves, before gesturing with his head toward the door Albrecht stepped out of. "Do you think he knows?"

Emmaline ran her hand through his dark locks. "Hmmm?" She blinked. "Oh, no! I mean, he's not stupid, he probably suspects something, but he doesn't know anything."

"I guess we have been careful," Malcador reasoned as Emmaline threw clothes across the room, fixed her hair, and changed into a different blouse in a flash of cloth. Malcador closed the door, before he turned back to Emmaline, looking even more beautiful than ever. She sported a light jacket and men's trousers for moving quickly, hair tied into a ponytail.

"Not that I'm complaining but..."

"Our chores are done, remember?" She asked him.

Malcador was still chilled from the spell on him, but after a minute or two, he remembered. He stroked his fine chin. "You're right, we've got a halfling to warn." He said. "But, after that, we're getting drinks, a room at the inn, and my tongue buried in wherever you want."

She looked at him incredulously, tilting her head. "You're acting as if that's a quid pro quo and not something I was planning on doing anyway."

"...right. Should I change?"

"I can spruce you up a bit, I suppose..."

A few minutes later, the two of them were down the stairs and heading off of the College grounds, trying to pass as quickly and quietly as possible, while still trying to appear to be nonchalant. They almost made it out, before the unlikeliest of people barred their way. It was the old Celestial mage they had delivered the scepter to earlier, his beard singed from some unknown mishap in his arcatorium. He looked as if he was heading somewhere to complain, a gleam in his eyes, when he stepped in their way on the smallest street.

"Oh, it's you lad! And the golden lass as well." He said, as if he was waiting for this moment. Perhaps he had been. He took a professional poise, pursing his lips. "You know, I should thank you for the timely delivery. Here..."

He closed his eyes, and placed his hand atop Malcador's forehead. It was warm to the touch, and it grew mildly hotter as he began to concentrate. There was a soft light behind his closed eyelids. "I foresee you have great potential! A true master of your craft, my young mage! But a dark cloud hangs over your head, threatening to scatter your talent to the wind if you let it!"

Malcador was not certain what to make of that, before the old magister turned to Emmaline and placed a hand atop her forehead.

After a few moments, he said. "Ah, the dark cloud I had foreseen."

Emmaline gave an offended gasp, but Malcador looped his arm around hers and pulled her away. The old wizard cackled at their backs as Emmaline glanced back over her shoulder, glaring daggers.

"He's joking. He doesn't like gold wizards." Malcador assured her as her anger turned into a pout.
It was odd how many times Malcador's life was saved by finding refuge in a broom closet.

He had whisked Emmaline off down the stairs and through two hallways, beginning to walk more casually past a servant going about his day, before he quickly turned a corner, opened the door and shoved Emmaline in there before joining her. He closed the door behind them, and when Emmaline began to protest, he shushed her and recanted a small incantation that would seal any noise they made and kept it within the confined space. It was the irony of the gods none of this was to have any fun with her.

The soft glow disappeared from his hands, and just as he finished, there was a light above the both of them Emmaline had quickly conjured for convenience. When he looked at her, it seemed like she had done it out of habit. Her eyes were full of distracted worry. He knew how she felt.

"What do we do?" She whispered, hands dragging down her face.

"I don't know," he admitted.

"You're the smart one!" She insisted. When he glanced at her incredulously, she flung her hands out. "You've got all high marks, right?"

"Well, yes." He admitted with a bit of arrogance, before brushing his pride away as if he grabbed one of the brooms to do it. "I'm good at magic and arithmetic, not this sort of thing! Besides, you're smart too!"

Emmaline held up his coin purse in her hand. "Why cunning is a bit different," she said, and before he could protest, she handed it back to him. After he took it, Malcador began to think. "No one saw us, at least, that we know of. That gives us a small advantage." The dashing mage shook his head, exasperated. "Maybe we should tell someone..."

Emmaline shook her golden head. "I can't tell my master, he won't believe me! And even if he did, he would say it's not his business."

"I can't tell mine either. He would look into it, find no evidence, and then ask me why I was in that part of... Oh Sigmar save me, I still need to make it on time." He gestured with the scepter, and pinched the bridge of his nose. He was caught off guard with Emmaline grabbed the front of his robe and pulled him closer, though it was to emphasize her words rather than a kiss.

"I can't get in a large amount of trouble again, Mal! Do you understand!?" She asked with pleading eyes, before tears brimmed and she pressed her head into his chest. They dissolved all thoughts of consequences for the moment, and he let the scepter fall into the brooms as he drew his arms around her, stroking her hair. His entire association with Emmaline Von Morganstern was driving him up the wall, but he found it was not entirely unwanted, despite the risks.

"I'll make sure that doesn't happen." He promised, and found he fully believed the statement, despite his lack of knowledge on how to keep said promise.

She sniffed and drew her head back, albeit still clinging. "What if... What if we don't tell anyone?" She asked hesitantly, a small catch in her eye. "What if...we let it happen?"

He looked at her, and the self-preservation in the logic, despite the death of the Ambassador on their hands, made Malcador tempted to agree with her. Not only that, but he found himself growing aroused at Emmaline suggesting it, and realized there was something immensely wrong with him. Of course, most things Emmaline did caused that reaction, but he had to draw the line somewhere. "No, we... Look, if we let it happen, and someone finds out we knew, we wouldn't get in trouble. We would be on the chopping block."

"Honestly, I was hoping you would disagree with me," she confessed, nodding. "Ranald fuck me, so what do we do?"

Malcador licked his lips. "We... Let's finish our chores. Let's stay together as well. Rumors we can handle, right? We'll think on who we can tell, and then we'll discuss it again tonight, yes? They wouldn't kill him tonight. It's too soon from a plotting stage."

"True, and they're likely to be more careful now that they know someone heard them." She reasoned. "Still, getting involved is even riskier than not, but we can't just let it happen, right?"

"Why don't we tell someone anonymously?" Malcador temporized. Emmaline blinked, and smiled, clearly glad to find a solution that sated her guilt while also giving them a scot free way out. She poked his nose with her finger playfully.

"See? I like that big brain of yours, among other parts of your anaotmy." She teased.
Beren was about to think he had imagined the rumbling, and it began to quietly die down. His heart rate slowed, and he relaxed.

Until the statue screamed.

He screamed too, before bursting into action. He took his staff in both hands and flourished it, landing in a stance that gave him the greatest leverage with a forward swing if necessary. However, the statue was no longer made of black chlorite. It fell into life, falling to the floor and gasping for air. He stood transfixed, utterly confused on what exactly was happening. The monsters had been one thing, the lava another, but this was by far the least expected thing he had ever seen. Slowly, he dropped his staff, dumbfounded. He instantly regretted it when the woman reached up at him, and he felt a refreshing chill pass through him, his staff up again in the blink of an eye. Yet nothing happened.

He let out a breath, and was about to speak when she reached toward a boulder and it de-materialized in a cacophony of inky black sorcery. He yelped in alarm, and watched her rise up in a likeness of the goddess he believed her to be, and her supple form was ensconced in black silk that shimmered in the wan light. To his surprise, she spoke. Her voice was sonorous, yet the tongue was brutal and harsh. It was a strange contrast. It took him another few moments to realize he understood it. It was Xerubian!

He must have seemed completely stupid to the woman, flummoxed as he was. His mouth worked, but no words came out for three more heartbeats, until he swallowed and fixed his unkempt mane of hair. "I... am Beren... Beren Draiglwyf Mac'Riglas, a Sanguken monk. Er..." He tried to find the right words in his lexicon that he could translate. "T-Traveling seeker of knowledge."

It was as accurate as he could be. He was not about to lie to this deity or great spirit he had awoken. It was a humble description, to be certain. His strong form and scars, along with his relative youth, might have suggested otherwise, but there was no deceit in his voice. He looked around for an escape, but there was none. Hel, even if he spotted one, he would have had to run thirty meters over open ground to reach it. Instead, he pulled at his nonexistent shirt collar, before realizing he stood stripped to the waist.

"Who are you, great one?" He asked her tentatively, hoping his words were correct. A part of him believed he had called her a man, but luckily he had found the gender neutral term. He almost prostrated himself, until he remembered that was sacrilegious to his order.
The world had changed. The river valleys of the old world had been washed away in a raging torrent of flood waters, and the once fertile kingdoms became the Sunken Realms. History became Legend, Legend became Myth, and as the Dragon Lords came and burned the old forests, and the Outsiders invaded in their ships of silver, when the Lizards-That-Walk devoured the southern tribes whole, still remnants of the land before lingered. Always did men pick up the pieces and rebuild, for it is in their nature to cling onto life as if it were a mother's skirts. The knowledge of civilization crept back into the world, and the Age of Calamity was replaced by an Age of Bronze and Silver, of Iron and Myrrh, and all that was once lost seemed to be found. However, life is not all men cling to, and some things that are better left forgotten, are uncovered and unbound once again...

The jungle was stifling, relentless. The branches of the trees reached over their boats, vines draped into the water like hangmen's nooses in the wet, sultry air. All was quiet, save the screeches of the jungle and the palpable uneasiness of the accompanied men. Rolgo Sunder twitched from the fat mosquito bite, cursing under his fetid breath. The squat coxswain's eyes shifted constantly, at times so focused on his suspicions that he forgot to squash the insects that preyed on his blood. He glared daggers into Beren's back, but the monk ignored him. He was too occupied with maneuvering the longboat, keeping his front foot stable on the bow. Behind him, the golden haired lady Nestepah watched the jungle and her men in equal measure, severe as an eagle.

The jungled island hugged the northern coast of the burned land, Theas. It was a part of a small, western archipelago that had not been mapped for centuries. Not since the lizards-who-walk had slaughtered most of the southern cities, save a few hermits seeking solitude or sea brigands that used them as lairs. People who ventured here disappeared, swallowed by some unknown evil, or perhaps a myriad of them. The seas had been exceptionally beautiful, but the sun was merciless, nearly burning through the mogshade of the canopy, which kept it just hot enough to form the suffocating steam. Strange furred beasts, small parodies of men Beren knew to be 'apes' screeched and cawed with undulated hoots.

"Captain, we are being watched! Look!" Iakovos's hoarse voice cutting through the pregnant silence. He was a bronzed man, similar to Beren in that way, but judging from his name, they were of different people. Iakovos hailed from the last isle of his ancient nation, Xykonos. All eyes followed his pointing hand to the treeline on the northern shore. Beren's eyesight was keen, but he could not make out any shapes in the impenetrable jungle, until his breath caught. The figure of an enchanting woman stood frozen, stricken, watching them from the shallows. It took him another look to realize it was naught but a bas relief, albeit of exquisite design despite the wearing. It was plastered onto a perfectly square block of basalt. Vines and ferns draped across the body of the block.

"We're getting close," Nestepah stated approvingly, but the icy woman rarely smiled. In fact, in the two weeks Beren had known her, he had only seen it once: When he acquiesced to go on this expedition. She glanced his way, and he nodded.

"Those eyes are made of jewels," Rolgo rumbled greedily.

"Agates, I think." Finley replied, the red haired fellow a keen lookout in the crows nest. It seems he had a fine eye for more things that ships. A few of the men looked at one another, but Nestupah gave them a 'sst!' that drew their attention.

"Eyes forward, lads! There will be plenty more where that came from once we find the Temple." She reminded them, and her assurances were enough to turn their talk into whispers and sly looks. For her part, she turned to Beren as if in confirmation. He gave her a broad shouldered shrug. "As far I know, but I've never been here before, you understand." He reminded her. "Besides, the Lugal will pay you and your men regardless, right?"

"Of course," she purred, noncommittally. The sly woman turned, her caraco jacket long since removed, her blouse gently stained with sweat. "But the more we bring back for his collection, the more he stuffs their pockets with the reward. Think of it as... commission." Weeks ago, they had come to his small island in the Neheoul Sea to seek his knowledge of ancient languages. Initially, when they had first beached on isle of the lonely minaret, they had been skeptical of his expertise due to his apparent youth, and bade him translate a rusted sword inscribed with Theonic runes. Despite his success at the task, he had gathered they had only accepted him because Nestupah and her men were desperate. He had to admit he was desperate too. His monastic order was dying, the great lugal kings of the remaining citadels too busy with their wars and their trade to preserve knowledge. If this expedition was successful, Nestepah and her Lieutenant, Ishkur, had assured him they would tell their king a Sanguken monk had been pivotal in their efforts.

"Captain, more busts!"

"I said, keep your eyes on the-" Her words died when Beren heard whistling, and he turned just in time to see a massive sailor from Ubta catch a dart in his huge neck, his eyes bulging. He swayed, and pitched over into the water with a wet slap. "Shields!" Nestepah raised her khopesh, and as one her men raised wicker shields and the occasional hoplon as arrows and darts sailed across the lazy river with the relentlessness of steady rain. Beren ducked under a javelin, spying a naked man in red warpaint staring at him from two dozen meters away. "Row!"

What men that did not carry shields worked the oars with fervent abandon, speeding their journey upriver as war cries and hoots followed them. Two arrows clunked into the boat inches from Beren's arm, nearly skewering his hand. He pulled it back as he watched crocodiles sliding into the water to devour whatever meat fell into the stew. A few of the Ubtar expedition shot arrows back with their composite bows, but there were too few to make a difference, and the foliage masked any damage they might have inflicted from their eyes. Their harassment lasted minutes, until they found themselves rowing under a vine laden archway made of unknown material Beren did not recognize. On it, a serpentine dragon snaked across the arch, clinging to it as if it were a nest. It's head arched away from it, towards the boats, its maw open and its irises like a cat's.

It took Beren a moment to realize the battle cries and the missiles had suddenly ceased.

The sign of the architecture, along with their apparent safety, was a boon to the morale of the men. They breathed easier, and even Nestepah seemed to relax, albeit only just. He knew he should feel the same, but despite himself, the monk felt a vague sense of impending doom.

It wasn't long until they began to see broken pillars and small, ruined structures half sunken in the murk of the river. Evidently long abandoned. Even the birds and insects had grown quieter here. Beren clutched the pendant at his chest, muttering a small prayer for safety and guidance. The river had grown slimmer, the longboats now a stride away from one another. Past the next copse of trees, the scattered, broken ruins gave way to a large, stout Temple. Entirely formed of black swampstone, despite its symmetrical design and geometric shapes that adorned the open doorway, it seemed a derelict, organic thing, as much a part of the land as any tree or mudbank. An exquisitely carved processional entryway poured from the oblong entryway and into the murk of the water.

Twin obelisks framed the entryway, made of mudbrick, shaped with algebraic twists that teased the senses. Upon each was carved an enchanting woman. On the left, she smiled sweetly, as if to welcome them to her home. On the right, her face was twisted, caught between a terrible transformation into a demon. Her mouth was open too wide, his teeth sharpe, her eyes bulbous, yet they knew it was the same woman.

"It's the woman from the relief," Beren remarked to himself. His voice had broken the silence. The large warrior Ishkur turned his way, and one of his warriors, an aga-ush, asked Beren who she was.

"I don't know..." He said, shaking his head. "A local deity. I can find out more once we get closer."

"Don't have to tell us twice," Nestepah remarked, ordering the five longboats to beach in the canal just to the right of the great structure. As their boats sank into the wet mud, they saw pilasters along the breadth of the walls, carved to reveal the event of a great battle. Sunbeams of light struck the figures, each pilaster a different deity, and over them, an great form cloaked in power just beyond an eclipse.

They stepped off the boats as steadily as they could, spears and axes of iron in their hands. Ishkur sent his men to form a perimeter as the others went to look for extra openings to the temple proper. Nestepah and a few select warriors stepped lightly to join Beren at the processional rampway, between the great obelisks. The door itself was old, heavy, made of cedar and bronze. The color had long since faded, but running his hand over the slabs showed him it had once been painting. Now, he had to decipher which grooves in the doorway were glyphs, and which were ornamentation. Ishkur placed his great shoulder into the door, pushing with all of his considerable might. He grunted, but it did not budge.

"It will take all day to break this open." The warrior told Nestepah, chewing on his bottom lip.

"Get your men to carve out a ram," Nestepah started, but Beren held up a hand.

"Wait!" He bade them, his eyes never leaving the doors, hands still caressing the etchings along its breadth. He recognized the glyphs to some degree, but they were queer, alien in some capacity. He could not guess. Perhaps it was a liturgical form of the old Xerubian script. He swore he could translate it to a rough degree, if he only had the...

"Aidkhul... Yek jaharat fi... alwahli... wadai alakharn yiasuni."

The sudden grinding caused the onlookers to flinch back, drawing their weapons defensively. Beren held his hands out disarmingly, though it was a gesture that was aimed at the doorway, as if it were a stray dog that would cease doing tricks if he spooked it. Inexorably, the doorway opened inward, and refreshing, cool air hit their faces. That was odd. Beren had expected the air to be musty, but there must have been ventilation elsewhere, cleverly implemented to keep whatever worshipers there were cooled from the elements. Beren breathed out, letting his shoulders ease, before a sudden pain exploded in the back of his head, and he knew no more.




He dreamed untold hours had passed. So long, in fact, that when Beren woke, the day had fled, and the night had been all but spent. There was a wan light from the doorway, he could have sworn, but when he truly woke up, he knew it was the same day, perhaps less than an hour later. The pain still felt fresh, albeit it had evolved into a dull ache. Someone had contemptuously tossed him off the entryway into the soft, fern covered earth beside the stone. No doubt they had assumed they had killed, or permanently damaged Beren. Unbenknownst to them, he was made of sterner stuff.

Groaning, he reached up to grip the edge of the stone rise, slowly pulling himself onto more solid ground. He heard no voices, and did not have it in his mind to check the boats. Instead, he gathered himself and rubbed his face, taking his staff in his hands and leaving his bag of scrolls within the drier lobby, by the entryway. As he stepped in, it was ensconced in gloom, but the light, the light of his dream, was still there. As if no matter how much shadow there was, you had enough light to spare your vision to some degree.

That was how he discovered the first eight corpses. They lay scattered in the lobby, skewered by arrows. It made no sense, he couldn't guess where they had come from. No native bodies were amongst the dead, and the arrows looked more sophisticated than the ones Beren had seen from the shoreline. One man lay with an obsidian arrowhead lodged into his eye, his other orb staring at the inner corridor that led further within. He looked, and the light poured out as if fire from the throat of a dragon. He squared his jaw and stretched his neck, before taking a tentative step onto the stairway that led deeper within the inner sanctum.

In the next room, he found more corpses. It looked akin to a small tomb, two stone dog-headed demon sentinels stood, four arms crossed, gripping scimitars in each clawed paw. Aside from that, and further bas reliefs of ancient conflicts of gods and men, there was no sign of danger. Yet Iakovos had lost his head, the man's torso draped onto a sarcophagus, his neck severed by some unseen blade. Seamas lay broken across the floor, his body twists, shattering clay pots from whatever had thrown him bodily. Four men had joined them in death, their wicker shields cloven and their bodies hewed bu mighty blows.

Every room was the same. There was a corridor with a walkway across water as black as ink, blood staining the stone. A library of ruined tomes, each corpse found mummified as if his blood had been forcefully drained from his body. The mausoleum, the shrine room, even the larder, everywhere he went, there were men who had been brutalized by mysterious guardians. He had begun to wonder if he was the last man alive, until finally he stepped into an immaculate antechamber, adorned with exquisite pottery featuring the likeness of the same goddess, great brass statuettes of sinuous drakes clutching crystalline orbs of swirling darkness, the walls adorned with tapestries of great heroes he swore he could recall, had he not been so enthralled and horrified of the past hour. The doorway past the room was encrusted with emeralds, rubies, lapis lazuli, and semi-precious stones that glinted tantalizingly.

He was ripped out of his contemplation when he heard cackling laughter from within the next room, echoing into the antechamber. Beren rushed through the archway, and found himself in a great hall of dazzling beauty, piles of golden coins from before the written histories had been penned rolled across the floor like distant hills. Xiphos and Khopeshes encrusted with jewels lined the walls, suits of armor glittered from unknown material, and at the furthest end of the warmly lit room, Nestepah, Ishkur, and Rolgo Sunder stood, gazing up at a scepter that lay clutched in the talons of a Bagrada, a poisonous serpent of massive proportions that rose above them like a vengeful god.

The woman, covered in blood and ashes from breeches to blouse, ascended the stairway as the two men watched. She stood tall, but to Beren she seemed positively puny before the massive figure of the serpent.

"Wait!" Beren cried, echoing his words from hours ago.

All three spun to regard him. Rolgo bared his teeth, having never hidden his hatred for Beren, jealous of the ladies apparent favor towards him. Ishkur sneered, hefting his massive axe, while Nestapah seemed more impressed he had been able to follow them so far.

"I knew I should have hit him harder." Ishkur remarked blithely.

"Well done!" Nestepah called over her shoulder. "It was out of respect for your lore-keeping that I kept Ishkur from cutting you down. Now stay out of my way, and you may yet get your endorsement."

"I said wait!" Beren roared, his voice reverberating powerfully. For the second time, Nestepah looked at him, and this time she was none too pleased. Beren did not care. He held his hands up, dropping his staff. "If you touch that scepter, we will all die! It has been written! I saw it!"

"Silence, whoreson!" Rolgo snarled.

"Why?" Nestepah asked.

"It is not for you." Beren told her, and as the words left his lips, it was the wrong thing to say. She gave a laugh, and he recognized it as the cackle from earlier. "It is for those with the will to take it! Ishkura, make his death quick."

"As you say, lady." The big warrior replied casually, grinning at the chance to fight once again. Apart from a large scar across his shoulder, he had managed to delve into the Temple depths unspoiled. Beren sighed, and waited another few moments before he reluctantly pulled off his monastic robe to reveal a surprisingly muscled torso, nearly bursting out of his white top. A few scars covered his arms. His dark blue salvar breeches seemed to absorb the light that glinted from the gold. Ishkur seemed surprised, evidently thinking he was merely a scholar.

The brute should have done his homework. The Sanguken had been demon slayers before the world had changed. He would be no easy prey.

Unfortunately, before the two men could clash in a feat of arms, Nestepah decided to reach for the scepter.

"Lady, I beg you!" Beren cried, reaching out as if that could make any difference.

"Silence!" She screamed, ripping it out of the clawed grasp of the Bagrada, greed in her green eyes. Ishkur was charging him now, but he did not notice. Instead, he backed away slowly, before sprinting out of the room. Even as he passed the archway, he saw the bronze statues begin to melt as if super-heated upon the surface of the sun. He gave an unceremonious 'shit shit shit!' as his long legs carried him, scooping up his staff as he ran. He heard Ishkur's cry of 'coward!,' yet before it had ceased to echo, it was followed by the accompanied screams within the vault. He heard a final, soul wrenching "NO!" from Nestepah, before all was drowned out by the sound of the world breaking.

Stone walls cracked, the stone floor sundered, every piece of bronze and brass began to melt, and to his horror, within the cracks he saw brilliant, fiery light. Magma. It seeped out of the walls, and the floor behind him in the corridor gave way, revealing the very heart of hel, lava crashing into the stone like waves in a squall. In the mausoleum, the stone guardians had fallen, broken upon the floor. He vaulted over one and continued his mad dash, hoping to all that was good he could make it. He leaped out of the last doorway before the great stairs, and lava poured out from behind him, nipping at his heels as he sprinted across the stone walkway, the black water having disappeared to reveal an endless chasm. Beren was brave. Almost fearless in fact, but that had limits. He felt some shame when he cried out in denial as the slim stone walkway broke beneath his feet, and he plunged into the endless nothingness of the abyss below.




This time, he truly did not know how long he had been out, and this time, he felt far worse than he had at the front of the temple. Yet he was alive, as painful as a comfort that was. He slowly opened his eyes, and miraculously, there was dim light, albeit from far, far above. He glanced up, but even that gentle light seemed blurred to his eyes. He must have received a minor imbalance of his humors within his skull.

"Blessed Oghru, why am I not dead?" He asked aloud, weakly. Better to have died in the fall that starve as he ceaselessly wandered whatever cavity he now inhabited, trying to find a way out. He reached up and held his forehead, glad to not feel anything more than a small knot when his fingers reached the back of his head. Groaning was now an old friend, and he slowly sat up, his world spinning gently. Blinking, he tried to see where he lay, likely in some massive, useless cavern. His surroundings did not disappoint, meeting his exact standards. It seemed almost like a wound in the stone, massive and bulbous, like one of the domed towers of Sagrahad. However, oddly enough, there was sign of ancient habitation. Broken amphorae and small, lesser coins lay ubiquitously on the expansive floor, and to his surprise, he found his staff a dozen meters away from his position, laying atop a mound next to a shattered urn.

"Of course..." He breathed, sarcastically. Beren would never have guessed he would have seen the woman again. Yet for the first time, he beheld a life-sized statue at the center of the light from above. It was formed of strange material. It was as black as the abyss, likely sculpted from black chlorite, he reasoned. Her body was lithe, shapely hip cocked, her bosom plump, and her limbs slender. Her body swathed in an ancient kalasiris. He was not a particularly lecherous man, he would have enjoyed seeing the head, yet it was missing. That, and her left arm. He got to his feet, somehow curiously possessed at viewing the thing. He stepped closer, and noticed both the head and the arm atop the central mound.

"Well, least I can do." He remarked, sardonic now that he really felt he had no chance of escaping. Yet he could not leave something of historical significance so broken, and so he took the head in his hands. Her hair was coiled in a ponytail, her eyes sharp and wickedly cruel, and her rosebud lips were pursed as if all before her was found wanting. Even with such a look, she was lovely, heart shaped face accentuated by her cheekbones. Whoever had sculpted this had been a marvelous talent, he thought. Gently, and with great care, he placed the head back onto the neck. To his surprise, there was no flaw after he had done so. Beren had thought some edge would have been missing, but it looked as if it had never been broken. The arm would be more tricky, he realized, and decided to at least see if it could still feet. He took the supple limb in his hands, and gingerly placed it upon the stump. "Huh, it fits." He said, and gently pried it away.

Until he realized he could not.

Beren blinked, but his thought process was broken again by yet another rumble of the surrounding area. He looked left and right and up. It seemed he was cursed from one catastrophe to another, and he backed away from the statue. At least, until he realized the rumbling came from the statue itself, and nowhere else.

He back away more fervently, and he began to run, until he realized there was nowhere left to run to. Little did he know what would happen next would change his life forever...
© 2007-2026
BBCode Cheatsheet