Hidden 7 yrs ago Post by shylarah
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@Gowi@MissCapnCrunch@TheMinorFall

I did the arts. And with that, the finishing touches on my sheet are done, and it is now in the char tab~ <3
Hidden 7 yrs ago Post by Skyrte
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@Skyrte I ALMOST FORGOT! I would think that Elian and Ebon at least know each other. Elian would respect Ebon, and her dedication to training, as well as her skill and real-world knowledge of healing. I could see them being at least friendly, maybe even friendly rivals. Possibly teaming up for things where one healer is not really enough? whatcha think?


Sure, I don't see why not.
Hidden 7 yrs ago Post by Gowi
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Friends came over yesterday and took my time away from RPG, so this looks like my window to do EVERYTHING. Nngh. I'll be in my PM box doing reviews. Ping me if needed.
Hidden 7 yrs ago 7 yrs ago Post by Gowi
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@The Irish Tree


I would love to give a detailed review, but for the content you’ve given me I cannot for the life of me come up with well-rounded critique by any means. Your character sheet is very well described, detailed, and seems to utilize benchmarks rather well. Shylarah has already spoken about these things in her way, and I agree with the core of said analysis. The only comments I can tell you that need adjustment or explanation is things like spelling Tyhrien incorrectly (listed as Tyhrian in Rough Virtual History), and that Pariah had a “price that wasn’t the largest dent in his wallet” – what did you mean by this comment? I know I didn’t outright tell anybody what Pariah costed but I estimated it costing at the very minimum of one thousand dollars for its module. Now for a professor this might not seem like an expensive foray, but it is hardly a coffee at the local bagel shoppe either. I also made the section “weapon of choice” to signify their preferred primary weapon and that of which they have the most skill with— but I believe I’ve accepted extensive inventory prior so it is a nitpick that is as superfluous as it is irrelevant.

There is also the fact I have no idea what the profession of Knight is— can you elaborate or use something more tangible?

With that said, it is really easy to approve it.

So easy I already have done it.
Hidden 7 yrs ago Post by shylarah
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Hidden 7 yrs ago Post by The Irish Tree
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@The Irish Tree


I would love to give a detailed review, but for the content you’ve given me I cannot for the life of me come up with well-rounded critique by any means. Your character sheet is very well described, detailed, and seems to utilize benchmarks rather well. Shylarah has already spoken about these things in her way, and I agree with the core of said analysis. The only comments I can tell you that need adjustment or explanation is things like spelling Tyhrien incorrectly (listed as Tyhrian in Rough Virtual History), and that Pariah had a “price that wasn’t the largest dent in his wallet” – what did you mean by this comment? I know I didn’t outright tell anybody what Pariah costed but I estimated it costing at the very minimum of one thousand dollars for its module. Now for a professor this might not seem like an expensive foray, but it is hardly a coffee at the local bagel shoppe either. I also made the section “weapon of choice” to signify their preferred primary weapon and that of which they have the most skill with— but I believe I’ve accepted extensive inventory prior so it is a nitpick that is as superfluous as it is irrelevant.

There is also the fact I have no idea what the profession of Knight is— can you elaborate or use something more tangible?

With that said, it is really easy to approve it.

So easy I already have done it.


The only comments I can tell you that need adjustment or explanation is things like spelling Tyhrien incorrectly (listed as Tyhrian in Rough Virtual History)


Fuck my ass and call me Sally, I swear I looked at the name like 4 times, and Thyrian doesn't even make much sense. Sorry about that.
In regards to the Knight Profession, I genuinely didn't know what else to call him. Any suggestions for a different kind of starting profession that fits?
Hidden 7 yrs ago Post by Gowi
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@Skyrte


In a shocking turn of events I’m not going to fuss about color formatting even though I did originally.

Despite having a very descriptive and well-crafted concept I do think you need to proofread it a little bit— there are some phrases that although exceptionally minor do read poorly as well as grammatical mistakes such as “haunt haunt” and “in the 2092”. These will take little time in adjusting, I imagine. With that said I do really enjoy your characterization and concept; I would have little issue accepting it… however, I believe Shy is right about the benchmarks situation.

Shy has pretty much stated all of my relative issues with the benchmarks (though I think increased proficiency/expertise with sabers are fine enough, though what does this earn her beyond not stumbling with the weapon?). I’d love to give this an immediate stamp of “go ahead, you good fam” but I feel like understanding the benchmarks has been a consistent issue in this RP that is largely my fault in not explaining it cohesively. Is there any specific help I could give in this fashion to make these physical benchmarks work? Here are my reiterations of my benchmarks for my character so we can analyze how I did it and make sense of what is different to how you did it:

Acrobatic Reflexes – In addition to her abilities as an evasive combatant, Rael is uncanny with her movement around an enemy thus making it exponentially more difficult to strike her or maintain a full threat assessment of her party given her tendency to jump, weave, and duck in the midst of battle. This benchmark has given her increased polish to her dodging abilities.

Dirty Fighter – Rael has always incorporated cunning into her attacks and using the environment against monsters and even resident opponents in duels. After doing this consistently for an amount of time she has found herself good at analyzing the environment for utility in battle whether it is a section of dirt, loose rocks, or weakened building supports. This has earned her a passive increase to temporarily immobilize her enemies.

Duelist’s Ethos – Rael is not a tank who blocks but there comes a time where she needs to meet an opponent’s weapon over simply dodging. However, instead of blocking Rael chooses to misdirect and counter instead; using her spear to shift an enemy’s weapon to the left or right instead of taking the brunt force of its blow. As such precision-based techniques in clutch situations come easier to her.

Evasive Combatant – As a tank who doesn’t bear heavy armor or extensive enchantments, Rael has had to take a different approach to combat; after conditioning herself to be faster than most of her peers she has achieved an agile and dynamic skillset that allows her to perceive things quicker and react in kind.

Provocative Presence – Intending to keep the attention of their enemies away from their allies, the rogue-like user has proven to constantly shift the attention of their enemy to focus on them by being agile and persistent. Due to this Rael has found herself emitting an inherent aura when in the heat of battle that attracts the attention of dangerous foes even when in the company of more dangerous allies that should be prioritized.

I’ve bolded key points in Hanako’s skillset for emphasis on how benchmarks are and should be.
Hidden 7 yrs ago Post by Gowi
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@The Irish Tree

Fuck my ass and call me Sally, I swear I looked at the name like 4 times, and Thyrian doesn't even make much sense. Sorry about that.
In regards to the Knight Profession, I genuinely didn't know what else to call him. Any suggestions for a different kind of starting profession that fits?
Sally

What do you want your profession to do? Remember this is the utility of your finance and craft.
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Hidden 7 yrs ago Post by The Irish Tree
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@The Irish Tree

<Snipped quote by Sally>
What do you want your profession to do? Remember this is the utility of your finance and craft.


I guess what he mainly wanted to do going into Pariah was to learn medieval combat and do adventurer stuff beyond the historian stuff...maybe Mercenary or Landsknecht would fit better?
Hidden 7 yrs ago Post by Gowi
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<Snipped quote by Gowi>

I guess what he mainly wanted to do going into Pariah was to learn medieval combat and do adventurer stuff beyond the historian stuff...maybe Mercenary or Landsknecht would fit better?

Suggestions:

- Archaeologist
- Collector (like Hanako, but perhaps not for the black market?)
- Keeper (aka Lorekeeper— vague, I know, but it fits the route you want)
Hidden 7 yrs ago Post by shylarah
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Adn I suggest guide, teacher, and trainer. <3
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Hidden 7 yrs ago Post by Supermaxx
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No, ignore them. Make him Medieval Indiana Jones. Fucking do it, mate.
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Hidden 7 yrs ago Post by MissCapnCrunch
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MissCapnCrunch Pᴏʟɪᴛᴇ & Pᴇᴄᴜʟɪᴀʀ / Pɪʀᴀᴛᴇ Pʀɪɴᴄᴇss

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I suggest a knight who sells candles and candle accessories.
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Hidden 7 yrs ago Post by Gowi
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I suggest a knight who sells candles and candle accessories.


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Hidden 7 yrs ago Post by Ozerath
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Should I put my guy in the characters tab for easy finding or wait til he's approved?
Hidden 7 yrs ago Post by shylarah
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@Ozerath UI have linked Gowi the post, so I think waiting would be wise. <3
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Hidden 7 yrs ago 7 yrs ago Post by Skyrte
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@Gowi
I think you looked over the older character sheet. I went over the sheet anyways because I didn't really proofread it in the first place and fixed a few errors.
As for the benchmarks issue perhaps making a list of the existing and accepted benchmarks will benefit people? Additional examples wouldn't hurt either. They can look over this list and take skills from that list, instead of making a third ability about combat awareness, or they can look to the list and get a better idea of what benchmarks are all about.


Hidden 7 yrs ago Post by Gowi
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As for the benchmarks issue perhaps making a list of the existing and accepted benchmarks will benefit people? Additional examples wouldn't hurt either. They can look over this list and take skills from that list, instead of making a third ability about combat awareness, or they can look to the list and get a better idea of what benchmarks are all about.

This probably would've been a thing I should've done a month ago, but after like twelve characters at this point it might be a bit... superfluous. But yeah, I more or less agree. For now all we have as examples are accepted CS's and their benchmarks section.
Hidden 7 yrs ago Post by shylarah
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@Gowi for the most part, people do okay with 'em. Outside of...y'know, general flailing. And I'm sure us DMs are happy to help if they need a lot of reworking in a partiocular case. ^.^
Hidden 7 yrs ago Post by Gowi
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I am quite partiocular, yes.
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