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5 yrs ago
Current Moved to Discord. Visit my YouTube channel (ArtyPickles PvP) at m.youtube.com/channel/UCVer…

Bio

Call me Doc. I prefer RM, UM, or LP fights, with human or peak human hand-to-hand or swords & sandals being my speciality.
Challenge me to a match any old time!

Arena Characters: http://www.roleplayerguild.com/topics/87852-docs-characters-no-posting/ooc#post-3105991

Most Recent Posts

@Athinar

Xil Gil had indeed been about to say something, having even begun twirling an index finger to accentuate some snobby remark. He then staggered back as bullets pounded against his body, maroon blood spattering from multiple skin-deep holes. His designer coat and undershirt were torn apart as easily as tissue paper, revealing a skinny but unusually chistled upper body criss-crossed in at least two-dozen places by long suture scars.

That kind of rifle could rip a normal man's arm off. Xil Gil, not even close to normal, began quickly pacing towards Chico, the crableg latching mechanisms on his feet digging into the ground and preventing the hail of hot lead from throwing him off balance. As he did so he extended both arms, palms open and in the rifle's line of fire.
He could tough out plenty of gunfire, but if enough bullets were to nail him, it could eventually start damaging his composite muscle fibers. Xil Gil's hands, though, were virtually invulnerable to bullets. They had to be, in order to allow him to squeeze nearly any material into putty.

He'd track Chico's aim with his hands as if they were a pair of tiny shields, trying to take as much heat away from his body as he could. There weren't any sparks, no. That's only in the movies. Instead it looked as if dozens of white smoke puffs were erupting from Xil Gil's hands.

All the while the cyborg slipped closer, he kept trying to yell something over the thunderous noise.


"SELF-DEFENSE!! SELF-DEFENSE!! I AM UPHOLDING MY RIGHT AS A CITIZEN OF THIS FINE STATE TO DEFEND MYSELF!!"

Yes. It was true. This was all taking place in Florida. Still a shit place in the future.

@Athinar

The foreman turned around to see who had addressed him. It was a foreigner, lanky and gawking, with thick spectacles and bad teeth. Of course. These types just couldn't keep their noses out of this. Foreman Louie had been commissioned by the board to make this city a place that people could live in again, and naturally some big corporation wanted the zone for another biomechanics factory instead. Well, not on his watch, not as long as the taxpayer's money was fueling his paycheck. The foreman stomped up to the foreigner and stared him hard in the face, hairy fists on his hips. The two were out in the midst of the massive dirt field, in full view of the entire project. Several baseball diamonds could have been drawn out in the arid dirt surrounding them. Plumes of dust rose from a few hundred yards away as the wall of a crumbling apartment was shoved down by a laser bulldozer. Yes, bulldozers with lasers. Why the hell not?

"I know what you're here for, moron, and you can take it and put it right up your asshole. Get the hell off-"

The newcomer interrupted, his voice a wheedling guttural mutter. He sounded almost like Mr. Bean.

"Oh dear... Are you threatening me?"

The foreman brought both fists up in front of Xil Gil's eyes, knuckles cracking.

"And if I am? I told you to get the hell out of here. Not you, or any of those other cronies will be fucking up my day job."

Xil Gil glanced around, protruding front teeth sucking on his bottom lip. Several workers were watching, most of the rest weren't. This sort of thing had probably occurred more than a few times before. At any rate, they were witnesses. The foreman had just delivered a threat. Surely this meant one could be justified in fearing for their well-being. In the name of self defense, Xil Gil took a sudden, sharp step forwards and embraced the foreman, taking him into a bear hug as if he were an old friend.

"Wha-, get the fuck off me you slimy little faggot! I'll- AAAAAAUUUUUGGGGHHH!! EEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!"

Insults became agonized bellows. Bellows transitioned into high pitched monkey screams. With a curt twist, Xil Gil finished separating the foreman's upper thoracic vertebrae from his lumbar, before efficiently pulling most of the man's spine from his back, ribs and muscles snapping as unstoppably powerful fingers clipped them as easily as pericardial shears.

"Sorry old horse. You were going to hurt me, weren't you?"

Arena: City in Construction



The remnants of a destroyed city being reconstructed.

Battle Theme:


@Athinar

Heavy armor is probably the best balance. If Chico goes all Solid Snake, he'll easily be able to sneak up and put a hole through Xil Gil with a railgun. However, if Chico plays around without armor or heavy weaponry, he'll be as good as dead the moment Xil Gil catches up and gets close to him.

I think the characters should start off fighting casually, not using their full power until they realize it'll be needed. Otherwise either character may die really fast, given the opposing natures of each fighting style. It'd be purely a matter of Chico trying to take down Xil Gil before Xil Gil closes the distance on him, and I'd rather have us warm up to that instead of getting down and dirty right off the bat.

Anyways, I'll make the thread now!
@Athinar

Chico looks like he can take on Xil Gil. For the setting, how about this?



The remnants of a destroyed city being reconstructed. Xil Gil's superiors want the land for themselves, so they've tasked him with sabotaging the project in order to coerce officials into allowing them to purchase the site.

Except...

The officials have expected this, and hired Chico in advance to safeguard the workers. The two hired tough guys clash in a way most spectacularly violent.
@Mag Lev

Here goes!

Arlo Joffen



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That Bloody Peasant

Name: Arlo Hedgewick Joffen
Aliases: Joff
Age: 42
Race/Ethnicty: Human
Place of Origin: Havarth
Gender: Male
Class/Job: Farmer

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Stats


Though we will not be rolling dice for feats, this will give a base line to run off of for your character. Max for any stat is 20, average is 10. You have 75 stat point to assign between the six stats.


Strength: 20
Dexterity: 12
Constitution: 20
Intelligence: 4
Wisdom: 6
Charisma: 2

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Physical Attributes

Height: 5'11"
Weight: 190 pounds
Build: Sturdy and rugged.
Eyes: Brown
Hair: Brown
Skin Tone: A mite tan.
Tattoos/Scars/Piercings: None notable.
Day To Day Attire: A basic tunic, nothing special. It's often dirty.
Strengths: Max of 3
    [*He's been working hard in the fields all his life, and as such has considerable stamina and a formidable practical strength.]
    [*He's too stupid to be afraid of most things. This can work to his advantage if, say, an angry giant isn't expecting Joff to be dumb enough to actually run up and stab it in the eye with a hay baler.]
    [*Joff is a very hard worker. If he can't get what he wants right off the bat, then he'll just keep on trying until he eventually gets it.]


Weaknesses: Minimal of 3
    [*Joff lacks an expert's skill at fighting. He's been in a few scraps with other farmers, but that's it. He doesn't know what he's doing most of the time.]
    [*He's too stupid to be afraid of most things. This can suck if he, for example, charges at a mad chimera and it rips his head off without hesitation.]
    [*Joff has terrible social skills. He's annoying, ignorant, and rude.]


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Psychological Attributes

Stubborn * Bold * Ignorant * Tactless


Sexuality: Joff takes what he can get.
Relationship Status: His wife died of blood farts, so he's single and loving it.

Personality: Joff is like a honey badger in human form. He's a single-minded creature living off the fat of the land, working day and night just to make a living. He is stuck in the old ways and would sooner trek halfway across a frozen continent barefoot than allow some big fanny duke to talk down at him. He has a mean streak running a mile long, and from his point of view every slight is an offense to be avenged. Step on one of his crops? He'll step on your toes. Bump into him? He'll bump his fist into your crotch. Send him an angry letter from a distance kingdom? He'll throw it into a bonfire because he can't read it, and then travel all the way to your damned house by way of mule in order to kick your door down for being more educated than him.

He has a farmer's lust in addition to the native hard-headedness, and is perfectly willing to satisfy any female that flirts with him, be she human or elf or fairy or dragon, so long as she is sentient enough to smile and wave. Joff's simplicity is so extreme that he also tends to take most things said quite literally, even if it has been explained to him multiple times what "irony" is. Having no concept of irony, he has no qualms about laying siege to his opponents with farmyard implements that one would never expect to be of use in combat, such as dried corn, logs, hogs, pots, rocks, pitchforks, ect.

Habits: Minimal 2
    [*Attempts to get lucky with every female he meets.]
    [*Blindly attacks any foe.]

Hobbies: Smoking a pipe whilst staring menacingly at people.
Fears: 3 real fears that make your character unhinged
    [*Gays]
    [*A poor harvest]
    [*Not being able to find a pitchfork when he needs one.]

Likes: 6 minimal
    [*Females]
    [*Good harvests]
    [*Stabbing foes with a pitchfork]
    [*Glaring at people]
    [*Smoking his pipe]
    [*Surveying a fertile land]

Dislikes: 6 minimal
    [*Gays]
    [*Poor harvests]
    [*Missing pitchforks]
    [*Females that refuse his advances]
    [*Noisy animals]
    [*Anything that threatens him.]


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Skills

A listing of skills, such as horseback riding, and natural abilities, such as night vision - this also includes any racial edges


  • Skill: Farming
  • Skill: Being a distraction
  • Skill: Manual labor


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Magic

A listing of spells, their descriptions - casting times, elements needed to cast, expected damage, any draw packs to casting

  • Spell: He's a &^%$ing farmer.


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Possessions


Possessions Generally On Person: Clothing, coin purse, money, etc
  • Item: Bag of coins
  • Item: Several ears of corn
  • Item: Pipe and various forms of tobacco
  • Item: Many bags of seeds
  • Item: Hobnailed boots
  • Item: A cow that tows a cart with his tools in it

Weapons: Personal weapons, no magically enhanced items
  • Item: Hoe
  • Item: Pitchfork
  • Item: Grubbing axe
  • Item: Asparagus knife
  • Item: Plow
  • Item: Sickle

Armor: Base armor only, no magically enhanced items
  • Item: Farmer's tunic

Animals: He has a cow.
  • Animal: A black and white dairy cow.

Pack Contents: What do you carry in your pack when traveling
>list]
[*] Item: Seeds, coins, pitchfork strapped to his back, corn, seeds, tobacco products.
Magical Items:
  • Item: None

Potions: Premade or prepurchased potions
  • Item: None

Creation Materials: Anything used to brew potions or for alchemy
  • Item: None


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History

Parents: Dead from dysentery.
Siblings: Dead from dysentery.
Childhood: Dead from dys- Oh, wait, no. he had a childhood. He spent it farming, The End.
Adulthood: He spent it farming.
Special Moments: The time he stuck a mountain troll up the ass with a seed dibbler, and the time he slept with a frost goblin.
Current Events: Somebody stole Joff's fattest pig. He has no leads and no idea what happened, but he knows what he must do. Scour the land far and wide until he finds his pig.

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Extras

Character Quote: "Roite, you took me pig then you fartly git!!"
Theme Song:
Aura Color: Joff's aura is brown and sticky looking, like mud and crap.
Scent: Farm animals and nicotine
Finally made a new character after a casual roleplay struck me with inspiration. Who will be the first to take on the awkward-but-lethal British cyborg known as Xil Gil, hmmm!?


@Terminal

Ha-Hey, thanks anyways though! It was fun being a part of this, and I look forward to the next contest.
@Terminal

Hey, I uhhh... Skimmed over some of the rules when I submitted OPRAH NO!, and missed the part that said I had to give you permission to knock my name up next to my story. Can we fix that? Also, might I ask how to activate that Stygian title?
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