Avatar of Gardevoiran
  • Last Seen: 2 yrs ago
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    1. Gardevoiran 9 yrs ago
    2. ██████ 10 yrs ago

Status

Recent Statuses

7 yrs ago
Who here likes cuddles?
9 likes
7 yrs ago
If your girl can't crack your skull between her thighs then whats the point of even being a human being.
7 likes
8 yrs ago
Identities are confusing to figure out.
4 likes
8 yrs ago
How do wing.
8 yrs ago
Omae wa mou shindeiru.
3 likes

Bio

Well hello.

I guess I should introduce myself, huh.

I'm Gardevoiran, just some schmuck going to college and working towards getting a degree in Fine Arts.

I do commissions and what-not, and you can ask me to do a commission for you through my Discord (Gardevoiran #1429) or up here through RPGuild PMs, and I receive donations and payment through my Ko-fi page. Clicking the box right below here will take you to it.



I'm a nerd. I play Pokemon religiously, I dabble in some anime, I write up here, and I love watching incredibly awful movies and just making fun of them. Specifically things like "Leo the Lion" and what not.

I don't have much else to say, so I guess I can leave you guys with a really bad joke.

"What do you call a cow with two legs?"
"Lean beef."

Most Recent Posts

Kendall - A Doctor's Visit
feat. Kendall's father

"Well, Mr. Banks, things have definitely improved with your little girl. She's a lot better than the last few times I've seen her, that's for sure."

"Is there anything new that I should understand?" Mr. Banks asks with his hat in his lap. He had taken time out of his work day to come take Kendall to the doctor, as per the usual checkups that they had to schedule because of Kendall.

"Off the top of my head, there are three. The first one is that she's a pretty tough kid. I actually hadn't noted this before, but it seems she heals at an increased rate." The doctor stroked his beard as he paced the room back and forth while explaining. "I had a bit of the tar from her vomit sent to the labs at the Protectorate for analysis. I think the tar she's made of has some kind of chemical in it that allows for hastened regeneration." The doctor took a quick pause before continuing on his tangent.

"Two. Her vomit is no longer containing any bile in it. For the most part, it is just the tar that makes up her body. It seems she has a reserve of it built up within her that she draws from whenever she vomits. Interesting, but it's still just a theory that I'm working on understanding-" The doctor was interrupted by Mr. Banks. "Y-you mean that she's finally free from the vomit as well?" The doctor shook his head as an answer to Mr. Banks. "I'm afraid not, Mr. Banks. Her vomit is still appearing, but - has she taken her anti-nausea medicine today, perchance?"

"No sir."

"As she told me alone. She's not vomiting as much as before, and even when off the anti-nausea, she's vomiting much rarer now. It's definitely an improvement on maintaining her body weight at a... relatively normal level," The doctor turned to Mr. Banks before continuing. "She's a tad bit underweight. Likely due to the anti-nausea medicine causing her appetite to decrease."

Mr. Banks sighed with relief. "So... she's good then? Nothing too out of the ordinary?"

The doctor stopped pacing before he looked at Mr. Banks. "That's number three. She's definitely improving, yes, but there are still concerns that I have on her well being. Now, she expressed interest in joining the Protectorate as a Ward, and I'll be happy to sign off on the paperwork for y-" Another interruption from Mr. Banks popped into the room. "No sir. We're just... we're not ready to say goodbye to our daughter just yet. At least, I think the wife wouldn't be okay with me making the decision alone."

The doctor frowned before returning to a normal expression. "I guess parents know best. Well, the offer is always on the table if you are interested. I'm going to go back into the room and meet with her before I send her back to you to take home."

The doctor re-entered the examination room as Kendall's face lit up with glee. "So? Did he say yes?" Kendall bounced on the examination bench as she eagerly awaited for the doctor to answer her question.

"He said no, sadly. Though, he looked pretty bummed about that answer, so there's still hope for you yet!" The doctor answered the tarry 14 year old with a smile on his face. "I think he'd be happy to let you join, but he wants your mother here to give the final word."

Kendall's face melted into a small frown. "Awww. Mom's always a party pooper, she'll never go for it." Kendall's hair was ruffled by the doctor as he spoke to her again. "Hey, cheer up champ. There's still some hope for you."

Standing up, the doctor began writing a few things down as Kendall went behind the screen in the room to change from the hospital gown into her normal clothes. Kendall's voice talked in a hushed tone as she spoke to the doctor. "Does he know about Mastar?"

The doctor raises his head up at the question, but remained staring forward as to respect Kendall's privacy. "Mastar? Kendall, you aren't Mastar!" the doctor said sarcastically. Kendall walked out from behind the screen afterwards as she finished putting her shirt back on. "Thank you for keeping that between us. I'd be grounded for years if they found that out." The doctor winked at her before he spoke once again. "Doctor-Patient Confidentiality. Though, I should really tell them since you're under 18..."

"Nooo pleeeasseee!" Kendall grabbed the doctor's arm as she begged. "I really like being a herooooo!"

"Well... alright. I'll keep it under lock for a little longer. If you join the Wards, though, we need to act like I never knew. Got it?"

"Got it! Thank you doc!"
"Transmutation? Not the prettiest, but it's definitely somethin' unique. I'll make somethin' for ya soon." Stride snaps towards you with confirmation as he begins to write in his book.

"I think I'll be headin' back to the house, now, see if I can't introduce myself to your allies. Grodlar should be done with 'yer hand, if you wanna go get that."

(Sorry bro robotics was really long this weekend. Meant to post on Saturday but got real sleepy.)
Lorenzo of Windor


Soothing the massive horse that he rode on, Lorenzo snapped quickly after he heard Martyrdom begin a low growl towards the stranger in the distance. "Calm boy. He is of no threat to us," Lorenzo commented before pulling his bow off of his things, an arrow notched in it as he rode for emergencies. He was a pretty decent shot with a bow, though he was a bit rusty at using one. It'd been a minute, that's for damn sure. The dog lowered his guard at the sound of Lorenzo's voice as they continued forth on the path. Though, getting a decent look at the man, he didn't seem terribly dangerous, but it was a good idea to stay calm and keep things controlled.
"... you mean like a bag of holding? Just a book?" Stride's face was unamused as he pulled out a small bag from his bigger bag. "Oi, Toby, think of somethin' good. Hell, think of something silly, I can make it work. Just make it unique."
"... so just a basic fire spell? I'm disappointed," Stride says as he reaches into his knapsack and pulls out a small red book, no bigger than the palm of your hand. "That's what you're talkin' about, and it works. Now gimme something harder."

"... really?" Stride bluntly says as he closes the tome. "Of all the damn spells I could use, you say something like a fuckin'... what the hell even is a flamethrower?" Judging from Stride's voice, you can clearly tell he has no idea what a flamethrower even is.

Raising her arms into the air, a wall of hardened light materialized as multiple scorpions found their bodies split cleanly in two, viscera falling onto the platform on which she stood. Any other scorpions found themselves sliding behind the duo of Holy Beings as they continued through the Ravine. A few of the scorpions landed on the platform, but found themselves charred as Amaterasu's hand rose and smote them with one flick of her finger.

"Castellum, this was a good plan," Amaterasu complimented the man as she kept the roof over the duo's heads. She really didn't feel anything for the man, but she did have to compliment good work when it was present. It was always nice to see such a deed prove successful in the Nexus. "It seems we are approaching the Oasis with good speed and energy."



Bonesword watched as he rushed towards the Oasis, the scorpions around him swarming him and Charlie quickly. How annoying it was to be surrounded by all the scorpions, especially considering the entire situation at hand already being quite difficult to handle with all the soldiers around.

Taking a quick check of his equipment, Bonesword noted his shield beginning to recharge as he performed a strong movement with his hand to the side, causing sharp blades of grass and foliage to erupt from the side of Charlie, just barely off of the ground. As Bonesword and Charlie proceeded into the Oasis, the scorpions chasing the duo would be chopped clean in half by the razor-sharp defenses created seconds prior. Though, a few did climb on, but they found themselves skewered by the skeleton's Cybersword and with the Shooting Star Shield taking effect, blasting their bodies into viscera. Gross, but effective.

Moving into the Oasis, Bonesword checked his surroundings before making the executive decision that he could adjust the fire of the Vulcan Yew onto a different target. After first adjusting the aim to remove any lingering scorpions, tearing their bodies into cheese, Bonesword aimed the miniguns at the hydra ahead as he toggled the fire to off. Bonesword didn't want to aggravate the monster just yet, instead opting for someone else to start the attack before he swooped in and began to unleash the guns onto the massive beast. Thankfully, the champions of Hell had distracted a good number of heads, but just to be safe in hopes that Bonesword didn't die this quick, he'd only attack when he could guarantee that he could take a hit.

For now, he moved forward towards the beast. He was still a fair distance away, but the distance was a blessing as it allowed for Bonesword to analyze if there was a path he could take to avoid the damned thing. As if he was gonna die to a field element.

On Course through Reverse Mountain!

"Aye-aye, Cap'n Boone!" Bonesword said as he sprouted a large tree in one of his designated spots so Kite had material to work with pre-emptively. The problem with moving the ship through Reverse Mountain was that the entire pass was jagged and risky, so having Bonesword multimanage a bunch of things at once was a bit of a tricky dick to deal with, but honestly he'd been through a bit worse.

"Someone get the milk ready, because I might need it halfway through," Bonesword called as he placed his hand on the deck of the ship, thick vines shooting out of the sides of the ship like wildfire. Each one returned into the ship's hull quickly after, creating a barrier between the rocky walls of the path the crew was taking and the hull of the ship. If the ship went down... they all went down.

Bonesword remained in the middle of the ship with his sword on his back and his hand on the deck, focusing on keeping the ship stable as the ship crept through Reverse Mountain. Worst-case-scenario, Bonesword fell in and died.

That... that was a very unpleasant thought, actually.

Bonesword shook his head as he just kept trucking, hoping that he'd be alright where he stood.
The lady gives an annoyed look at Stride as you walk outside the shop, Stride carrying his things along with him after leaving a tip. Whether he did it out of guilt or to be a sarcastic asshole, it's uncertain. It was a pretty good tip, nonetheless.

"He'll be done with it soon, just hold on fer a bit," He says as he begins scrawling in one of the tomes. "Oi, gimme a spell idea."
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