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Dear Mr Curly,
I have done little travelling lately because I have been so dreadfully weary. Can it be true as the old Ecclesiastes said; that all things lead to weariness? Surely not. Perhaps the opposite is true: that all nothings lead to weariness. I have a peculiar feeling, Curly, that I am worn out from something I haven't yet done and the more I don't do it, the more exhausted I become. How strange. Could it be something I haven't realised? Perhaps it's something I haven't said? Something I haven't finished! It must be very large and true whatever it is and a lively struggle in the doing but I look forward to it immensely. I know I need it. First, however, I must curl up in my chair and sleep deeply with the duck. Perhaps I'll dream of this thing and wake up refreshed and do it. My fond wishes to you Mr. Curly, and to all Curly Flat.
Yours sleepily,
Vasco Pyjama
xxx
P.S. Not having breakfast can make you weary. That's for sure!
Michael Leunig. The Curly Pyjama Letters.

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Janius' face softened. He stepped up and put a hand on Julan's shoulder. "I understand. It is an astonishing and wonderful feeling. Coming out if it, it can sometimes feel like there will be no one like that available to you. But remember you are young. There will always be someone out there. It's just a matter of time and helping opportunity."

He drew back slowly. "And as you get older, you'll earn more independence. You might strike out on your own journeys then. There are plenty of Argonian lasses out there, even like us." He put a hand on his hip. "Now, unless you had any further questions, you'd better find Hal-Leeus a nice flower to gift her."



Rhazii did not submit. His claws flew and his teeth snapped wherever they could. Ahnasha had to react to every movement to prevent injury to herself and simultaneously pin Rhazii down. He struggled as if fighting for his life.

Rhazii cried out in a broken voice. "GET...OFF!"

He slipped a shoulder free and bit down hard on Ahnasha's forearm. He thrashed to try and escape.
"Is that how she worded it?" Janius showed a little surprise. "Hm. Well, I don't know if it's much of a secret because I think only Hircine knows what really happened to actually turn her. The circumstances surrounding it all is worth mentioning, because she didn't exactly plan to get turned. I could not stay with her in the village, but she...wanted to commune with the Hist and Hircine in turn to know what to do. She was not exactly decided on leaving her village, her family. Hircine made the choice for her."

The joy was diminished almost entirely from Janius' face. "What followed was a most difficult time for her. She was torn away from everything she knew and loved, save for some young man she had only met a number of days prior. We, of course, made things work in the end. We have experienced such a joyous time that we would not take it back, even if we just made so many huge, youthful mistakes. But...she never really did fully heal from leaving so suddenly. Coming back opened those wounds, which is partly why she has been...well, you've seen it."

Janius stopped and faced Julan. "Listen, you are not me. Your situation could be so different that none of this turns out to be relevant. But know this; the suffering your mother went through is not something you need on your conscience. So don't do it to anyone here. Understand?"

Rarely did Janius speak so firmly to Julan about anything unless it was to point out present dangers.



Ahnasha's strike staggered Rhazii back. He fell back and pushed himself away on the ground in a scramble. Though he avoided eye contact and almost looked to be heeling, he barked out immediately after Ahnasha's command with a vaguely understandable "NO!"

He spun and galloped into another sprint on all fours, renewing the chase.

The reaction shed some light -- Rhazii had just enough control to disobey.
Janius nodded at the ground. "We didn't just talk. We laughed, we spent time sharing what our lives were like. We went on a hunt, which turned out to be more than we bargained for. We grew close very quickly without knowing exactly why. Perhaps we did not want to think about it." He gave Julan a smiling glance. "Mind you, we were several years older than you are now. However, then and now seem very similar, with what is beginning with you and Hal-Leeus."

His eyes went to the ground again and his smile faded. "Now, were you ever told how mother was turned?"



If Rhazii was listening, he made no indication. He kept his distance and continued gnashing his teeth and growling. Ahnasha had never seen him like this before. In truth, he had never fully lost control of his beast spirit before. Before Ahnasha was a wild animal.

The first movement Ahnasha made could not have been slow enough to avoid provoking Rhazii further. Rhazii lunged forward to snap before immediately turning and bolting away into the forest. The threats were just a response to his fear, empty but just flinching enough to make his escape.
I hereby forgive Capy's double post on the grounds that the post included the collective noun for owls.
Janius pondered for a moment. Several trails of thought lead through his mind until he stood up and beckoned Julan. "Let's take a quick walk. Don't worry, you'll have time to play later."

Once Julan was following, Janius took him in no particular direction. He started around the edge of the village.

"That the girl is Argonian may be part of it but I doubt it's all of it," Janius explained. "All it takes is someone special. That clinging in your chest? That paralysis? It's all natural. It's not wrong at all to like someone that way, no matter the race." Janius gave Julan a glance. "To be frank, me, Kaleeth, not to mention Fendros, Ahnasha, Meesei, and Lunise, we're exceptions more than rules."

Janius' tone shifted lower after another few slow paces. "Your mother and I told you how we first met, didn't we?"



Ahnasha did not look up to see Rhazii eager to eat. The first she heard was low growling. Rhazii backed another pace away from Ahnasha with every physically threatening posture he had. His neck bristled, his teeth bared and he held his claws down, ready to pounce. In his eyes was a fresh panic overwhelming him.

He did not speak, only bayed and barked.
Janius smiled warmly. He looked up to the treetops and reminisced quietly. Although, he remained brief with his words for a few reasons. "I think you know what that feeling is, Julan." He turned to face Julan. "Does she know how you feel?"



Rhazii's transformation was over before he knew it. He opened his eyes and immediately listened out, scanning through the forest for any movement. His beast was tense and holding back in an exaggerated expression of his own previous anxiety. Nevertheless, he followed along with Ahnasha.

Somehow, Rhazii managed to wait patiently for Ahnasha to eat. He paced here and there but did not spot the detail Ahnasha pointed out regarding their missing khajiit quarry. Rhazii's ears flattened and he stared at the ground. Inwardly, he wanted to rake his claws over his face to try and distract from continued the killing. Though, there was no stopping his mother. They had a job to do, and Rhazii's beast unconsciously sniffed the air and the ground for signs of a trail.
Janius held his head back and his chin down until Julan was done with his outburst. He unfolded his arms, blinked, and rested his elbows on his knees. "Very well," he said simply. He turned his head to the game and watched on. "Maybe we can work out the rules by watching."

In truth, Janius could not very well see the game in the water from where they sat. But Julan eventually opened up. Janius did not react immediately, choosing to keep his eyes on the ball as it was splashed around the swamp water.

"Mm," Janius spoke almost as quietly as Julan, if in a more reassuring way. "The way you've been looking at her tells as much. Tell me, have you got to know her? What's she like?"



Rhazii pressed his lips together and exhaled from his nose. "Okay, if you say so. I might, you know, still run around a bit. I don't have to worry about big things like the rest of my life or killing people when I'm transformed. That's all I meant."

As he spoke, Rhazii turned around and found a spot to start disrobing so he wouldn't destroy his clothing.
Janius crossed his arms and smiled all through Julan's excuses. Not even the attempt to shake him off with a new excuse worked. Janius held his gaze for another pause before speaking calmly. "You know you can talk to me about anything, son. I promise not to embarrass you. Come, what's really going on?"



Rhazii took Ahnasha's hand and stood to his feet. He looked back in the direction of the camp and frowned for a nervous while.

"I would prefer to find game, if that's alright." His voice lowered. "I need to distract myself."
Julan was well trained in many tasks. Lying was not one of them, Janius found. In fact, Julan's distraction made it easy for Janius to see what was really bothering him.

"Part of any fight is an unknown element, especially with strangers," Janius explained. "You're prepared, though. We've taught you how to read your opponent..." Janius deliberately timed his words with Leeus' flourishes in the game before them. "...To see how they move. It's like a dance. You must predict what they'll do and make the most of it."

Once Janius confirmed where Julan's attention really was, he grinned. "Honestly, I'm relieved to hear you're just worried about the rite. I thought you might be having girl troubles."



"Oh," Rhazii itched his shoulder. "Those are the expensive ones, huh. Right. Well, it's good to hear that it can be done without black souls."

Rhazii was silent for a while.

"Is there anything else I should know about it?" He asked. "If not...I would like to clean this blood off my shirt." He still sounded uneasy just glancing at it.
Julan was not the only one to take time learning more about Kaleeth's childhood home. Janius of course spent time training Julan and talking with him about how he was finding the village to be like, but his remaining time was spent engaging with strangers. More specifically, finding odd jobs to do around the village that allowed him to strike up conversations. There were more than a few polite rejections and outright cold shoulders turned his way, though he was able to find a few willing tasks.

Strangely enough, the people Janius spoke to were just as curious about the world beyond the swamp. The difference was their relative humbleness and politeness compared to the youths. Life in the swamp was hard work, unexciting and repetitive. But none Janius spoke to complained. He caught details of the feel of the village in ways Kaleeth could not have put into words easily. It gave him an appreciation for the place in all its differences.

The second morning, Julan's rite was still in the forefront of Janius' mind. His first thought after breakfast was to see how Julan was faring. The sight of him looking low concerned Janius from a distance, but he approached behind him with an encouraging smile. "Good morning, Julan," he said, before sitting down beside Julan and craning his head to look at his face. He switched to Cyrodilic. "What's on your mind? Feeling nervous about the rite?"



"I think I'll try anyway." Rhazii slowly pulled away from the hug. Ahnasha saw the conflict he felt as he avoided eye contact. "Just one more question about this. Life extension doesn't hurt anybody, right?"

The way he asked made him sound as though he was bracing to be dead wrong and rude in his presumptions in spite of Ahnasha's continued patience.
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