Recent Statuses

6 days ago
Current Feelin' like some space opera...
1 mo ago
In the words of Mark Watney - Well, that took a really long time. Slowly coming back to the world; I'll start poking around again soon.
5 mos ago
~His tarnished halo slips and shines, as the raging billows crash…~
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5 mos ago
Maybe back, looking for Advanced-level sci-fi or urban fantasy. Hmm....
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1 yr ago
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Hi! I'm Naril. I write, build things, and I'm incredibly busy, all the time. I'm probably older than you.

Most Recent Posts

I'll probably have a go. This will be my sixth or seventh; 1667 words a day isn't the easiest thing, but it's also great practice. Plus, crossing that finish line feels great!
Hello everyone! I am very sorry for the long absence, the Huge Thing I was hoping to be less involved with wound up needing my full-time involvement.

This will be delayed until late September.

Sorry again! If you're going to burn me in effigy, please only do so once or twice. <3

Definitely, for-sure in

@Lucky as Callista Baros - there are so many plot hooks that I want to play with here!

@Rapid Reader as Valerie Ward - I could read about Val for hours!

@vietmyke as Jacob McCallister - Bring Your Daughter To Work Day has never been weirder.

@Penny as Emmaline von - sorry - Emma Stern. I swear I can hear Emma's voice in my head like she's standing next to me.

@psych0pomp as Sloane Southsühn - You took me up on the offer for someone to be a Literal Archangel and made it work. I could not stop smiling reading this! Amazing work.

@Atrophy as Edwin Coates - The idea of someone with a deeply supernatural family makes me very happy. This character just made me feel good!

@Zombiedude101 as Nate Bishop - Urban fantasy characters are often haunted, but rarely are they this haunted. I'm into the idea. Let's see how it develops!


@POOHEAD189 - I like the idea of someone dealing with being (perhaps involuntarily) possessed by Coyote; trickster spirits are a lot of fun. I do think I want to know more about why he's involved with PHI, and what role he might have there, though.

@Dracorex - I am mulling over Matthew, and I admit I'm going back and forth. I wish I had a better answer right now, but "give me a moment" is going to be the best I have.


I will be adjusting the IC teaser post to account for a somewhat larger cast, and arranging various "session zero" things in the Discord over the next day or two. You are all amazing writers, and I barely feel like I deserve the incredible talent you have put on display! Here's to some excitement. :3

My apologies, work kept me very late tonight. Love being on the clock till midnight! I'm about to crash out so you'll see the final cast tomorrow morning!
I'm not dead, just busy!

Final characters will be announced Friday, 23 July!

IC thread should go up on Sunday, 25 July!
@Penny GIRL!
Dear god, all of you. I have so much to read! I love all of you already. <3
One day from interest to OOC? Well, I'm feeling lucky at least:…
Priest & Hawthorne Investigations

A Modern Fantasy Adventure

An introduction

The moon was a crescent of hard silver light the night Cameron walked into the aging room of his distillery and found a spider the size of a Volkswagen. There were other shapes nearby - cocoons, smaller than a person but not by so much that he thought he'd stick around and take a closer look. Cameron swallowed hard and backed out of the room, afraid that if he rolled the door shut he might wake the thing up. At the same time, though, if he left the door open, the spider might have an easier time getting out, and out is where it could eat him. Deciding that discretion really was the better part of valor, or at least of not being digested, he walked backwards with slow steps past the threshold, out into the humid Illinois night. Overhead, a sodium lamp cast harsh orange shadows over the rust-streaked exterior of the metal-sided warehouse, lending only a little extra color by the watery headlights of Cameron's truck, which had been new sometime before the first time humans set foot on the Moon.

He pulled his phone out of his pocket and looked down at the screen, then back up at the door to the aging room. He called up a dial pad, but...who was he supposed to call? The police? Animal control? An exterminator? He imagined the last conversation and let out the first bite of a barking, hysterical laugh, something that yipped out of his mouth and bounced off the corrugated metal wall in a sharp spray of discordant echoes. In front of him, the huge spider shifted, one giant leg coming uncurled from the apparently-sleeping mass with an almost delicate motion. Cameron took a step back, the phone slipping out of his hand, panic welling up behind his eyes while he watched another leg unfold, opposite the first. No longer caring how much noise he made, Cameron scrambled toward his truck, out of view of the door, and started digging in his jacket for his keys.

He was well into dropping them for the third time when he heard another sound coming up the driveway, this time something more familiar. Tires crunched on the gravel road, along with...something else. Cameron turned away from the slowly-unfurling spider, raising one hand against the glare of another pair of headlights, the sound of John Denver's Country Roads wafting into the night. The lights resolved into another truck, just a little newer than his own, and it came to a sliding, skidding halt a couple of meters from the door, spraying gravel all the way to Cameron's boots.

The truck's doors opened and a handful of people piled out, stepping over one another in no particularly good order. In the headlights' glare, Cameron couldn't quite see who these people were, save for the driver, who stepped out and took the few paces over to the man with long, quick strides. He could just make out her blue-green eyes, the curve of a cheekbone, the edge of a suit jacket. She looked at him, then at the warehouse, then back, and she shoved a hand through sweat-dampened hair.

"Hey, so," she said, sounding almost a little sheepish, "I've got a weird question for you." The words came with the rich enunciation of an English private-school education, which Cameron decided he wasn't going to worry about right now.

He looked past the woman, at the shapes of people behind her, then turned his head back back to the warehouse, neck muscles twanging. He tried to speak, but all that came out was a kind of squeak.

"Right," the woman said, "Look - this probably sounds ridiculous, but..." She took a deep breath and pointed at the building, "Is there a huge spider in there?"

Cameron gawped, a proper gawp, the kind that left his jaw hanging loose for a moment. It took him a long, long moment to get enough of his muscles under control to nod and point.

"Okay, thanks." The woman turned and gave a thumbs-up to the people behind her, and they came forward.

Cameron could make out more about the group now, in the hard shadows of two sets of headlights. They didn't look 'official' - no matching suits, no coordinated gait, not even the same kinds of haircuts. One held a shotgun, another had something wrapped around their arm, three objects pulsing with white light orbiting it with no obvious connection to one another. The woman watched with an expression Cameron couldn't read - a wry pull to a corner of her lips, a small roll of one shoulder. She breathed, and the air smelled like thunder.

"Who...who are you?" Cameron managed, after what felt like an eternity.

"Ah," the woman said, "...I'm Lydia. We're from Priest and Hawthorne Investigations."

Behind her, the spider had finished unfolding. It turned in place, long, delicate legs making the kind of thumping sounds on the ground usually associated with earthmoving equipment. One of the newcomers shouted, and the shotgun boomed. Cameron winced and fell against his truck, hands covering his ears. Morgan, for her part, stood steadfast and turned toward the warehouse. The spider shrieked, the sound almost louder than the shotgun. Morgan turned toward the warehouse, then looked back at Cameron. To her left, the metal wall buckled, and a meter of monstrous hairy leg punched through and started slowly rending a tear in the sheet metal.

"I wouldn't worry," Lydia said, reaching into her jacket, "We have this perfectly under control."



Hi there!

Welcome to the OOC thread for Priest & Hawthorne Investigations, a modern-fantasy RP!

In this story, the players will take the part of people working for the titular Priest & Hawthorne Investigations, a small paranormal-detective service operating out of Chicago (though cases can take them all over). You are people from all walks of life, and have come to PHI by various means - maybe you're a police detective who couldn't overlook something that was obviously a monster attack, maybe you're a Real Actual Wizard but still need a way to make rent, maybe you're a park service ranger who's seen one too many Bigfeet. Whatever the reason, you're living in that liminal space between the mundane and the supernatural, and sometimes helping keep people safe from things that they never knew meant them harm.

The tone of this story is going to be along the lines of Hellboy, The Dreseden Files or The Dirty Streets of Heaven, probably with a dose of Hellblazer, The Sandman, and because I don't believe in grimdark, Ghostbusters. Depending on what I'm reading at the moment, I'll probably toss different ideas into the pot (Supernatural - sure, why not! Jujutsu Kaisen? I mean, who doesn't have a crush on Gojo), and I am also very pleased to hear suggestions and interesting ways to push on the world.

Priest & Hawthorne Investigations is a very small office, perhaps 10 or so people. The founders, Ada Hawthorne and Samuel Priest, are not often around, and the nominal person in charge is a woman called Morgan - don't worry, there will be a list of important NPCs toward the bottom of this post. PHI has been a going concern for about 150 years, but you don't have to have been with the organization for that entire time, of course. Jobs are handed out by Morgan, and how she gets them is a surprisingly normal combination of referrals, hearing about weird things going on in the area, and people calling PHI with weird problems - the firm is, after all, on Yelp.

I don't mean to scare anyone off, but I tend to have rather high standards for posts and characters. I'd like this to be quite a small group of people (maybe up to five, including myself), and it will not be first-come, first-served. I don't have specific roles in mind, but I would ask that you consider what makes a good team dynamic and a good story. I am, for example, generally not looking for silent and distant loners, violence-crazed psychopaths, vengeance-driven walking armories, or children.

Other than that, I'm not placing too many restrictions on characters - Faeries, Literal Actual Angels, or even Literal Actual Humans are completely welcome. I would caution you that I am personally fairly tired of vampires and werewolves, but if you impress me and make a good narrative case for yourself, I'm very easy. That's really the rule for most things - make a good case for whatever you want to write, and I'm not too hrad to convince. The big thing to consider here is the why of your character - I don't care if the character is No Joke Actually Freya, Lady of the Slain, but I do care that there's a really good reason why she's slumming it in a dingy monster-fighting office with a shitty landlord and traded Folkvangr for Bucktown.

We will be having a loose Session Zero once the cast is finalised in the Discord (Which is here: to arrange things like what people think of one another, find the places where characters mesh in interesting ways, where they scrape in interesting ways, and try to round off the edges of the places where they come together in ways that don't work.

To that end: I do expect that the characters can work together. Like I said above, I'm not going to accept brooding, silent, inward-turned loners who communicate in monosyllables and by racking the slide on a handgun. (Unless you make it really funny.)

I do have several story arcs in mind, but they're deliberately designed to be flexible and to allow the players to push on the world; I will rarely say "no, you can't do that," since the yes-and of collaborative storytelling is my favorite part. :3 That is to say that I'm not not expecting this to be a bring-your-own-adventure sandbox, although I am more than happy (and am expecting to) tailor the world for the characters in it.

Finally, to contextualize the introduction above, the RP starts on a night where PHI has been chasing reports of a gigantic spider across the city. It has, over the course of the night, managed to get away from you a number of times, either directly running away or, in one case, causing a different problem that you had to deal with instead. You've been tracking it (if one of you has a means to do that, great, otherwise I'm totally handwaving how), and appear to have cornered it at a distillery some distance away from the city proper. What happens next is, well, up to you. <3

And now, without further ado, the character sheet:

In terms of lore - you've been in this world before. It's the standard urban fantasy pot, but feel free to expand on things where you feel it's important. If you want to flesh out world of ghosts and souls, that's absolutely something I'd like to read about; if you've got particular ideas about the Faen Courts, I'll probably let you get away with it. Did you inherit Baba Yaga's hut; are you descended from Haroun al-Rashid; is Gabriel the frontman of a Scandinavian metal band? So long as it don't tip the whole world on its ear, it's probably golden.

Again, the Discord is here: and I'm least some of the time! I'll also be responding here in the OOC thread, so don't be shy!
This is genuinely a ton more interest than I expected, so I'm going to go ahead and start dressing up the main RP thread. :3 I also have PMs from several of you, which deeply tickles me, which I will be responding to as well. In the meantime, I've also set up a Discord, since that seems to work well:
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