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Current fanficriff.blogspot.com/202… It's long overdue that I make fun of myself for a change.
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fanficriff.blogspot.com/201… This is one time loop that everyone will gladly forget about.
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fanficriff.blogspot.com/201… No, I can't imagine why you feel like you've read this exact story before, why do you ask?
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fanficriff.blogspot.com/201… I wanna be, the edgiest, like no one ever was~
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Erika


There was never a moment where important, tactical information was not being scrutinised.

With a look of utmost seriousness, the bespectacled British mage extracted a folder from within her jacket. She opened it to reveal what seemed to be a large mass of printed pictures, carefully curated by Erika herself. Given that she had practiced extensively just to capture these images for herself, she was quite proud of her reconnaissance work. Clear-blue eyes flicked upwards to meet the gaze of her Saber-class Servant, a confidant smirk curling her lips.

"Your input will be invaluable, Saber."

Information so vital that she had opted not to send Saber into the forest immediately. Others may see such a decision as folly, but they were not privy to the litany of tactics rolling through the esteemed magus' mind. She raised the top picture of the pile to better show off the contents: A shot of one of their own allies, evidently surprised to be faced with a smartphone pointed at them.

"This Akira girl, as adorable as she would be in the uniform, I wonder if that would just be wasting her innate charm~?"

It was crucial to determine how many of the ladies she was allied with, would be leaving this little grail war as her new maids.

Rider of Red


With the complaints of her cute Master washing over the stone-faced Rider, there was only one thought circulating the Servant's mind; Someone please attack us I really need the distraction.

Rider thought she could manage a decent enough relationship with her Master - if she was going to rely on someone to keep her tethered to the world, then hopefully it would be someone reasonable. With a knack for warfare. Or enjoyed a good scrap. Clarisse was... not exactly that, but that was fine! Sure, she was quirky, but who didn't have their own little oddities? Sometimes Clarisse looked at her Servant as if she were some unappealing side-show... which was strange, that was explicitly not what she looked like, and whoever wrote that stuff about her was damn lucky to be long dead!

At any rate, the constant stream of complaints was a little irksome, but not as annoying as the order to just leave. After coming all the way out here?! She was, like, five minutes away from a good brawl and her rabbit-eared Master wanted to go home?!

"...Far be it from me to defy orders, Master," Trieu began, turning towards the smaller girl with a forced smile, "but is that really a good idea? Taking me out the game would be a crippling blow to our side. 'Sides, I bet I could flatten this whole forest if we need to."


Finally finished this with a lot of much-appreciated help.

There we go, this took a surprisingly long time to fix up. Will soon have a Master written up.

I'll have my Master and Rider up in a few days.
Kishinami Hakuno


With the Servants rushing off to confront the kidnapper, Hakuno followed behind them, reaching for her radio. She couldn't do much to help directly, but HQ certainly needed to know this was happening. She had every reason to believe Benienma and Kaguya could resolve the situation themselves, but the fact that someone was trying to kidnap the girl at all was alarming. She was contracted to a Servant as well, right? So where were they?

"Kishinami here!" Hakuno barked as she ran to catch up the Servants, hearing the sounds of battle from the alley, "unknown assailant attempting to kidnap Tsugihara Amelia! Saber is currently engaging!"

Reaching the alleyway after noting the location, she came to a sudden stop and peered around the corner. Recklessly rushing into a Servant battlefield was asking for trouble, even if the opponent wasn't- oh.
It was a struggle to process exactly what was happening, but it looked like there was a third Servant, opposing Saber and Caster. Curling her right hand into a fist, Hakuno cautiously watched for any suspicious movement. Her support magic was paltry, but there was always Command Seals in the most extreme case. As long as that Servant could be repelled, saving Amelia was inevitable...

-------------------

Berserker - "Guan Yu"


Lady Guan didn't seem able to comprehend the idea that her elevated physical abilities meant her 'unimpressive' feats were most definitely out of the norm, especially to inactive girls. Still, if this guy and his Servant were so insistent that ten miles was somehow too much...

"Wait, video games? Those can help?" Guan asked, looking at them with intrigue and wonder. As far as she knew, video games were simply a form of entertainment - nothing she was opposed to, but not exactly conducive to an active lifestyle. Had she been wrong this whole time?! They could have been playing these games together and fostering a deeper bond and stronger bodies?! "I-I implore you, please tell me more!"
Whatever could Asahi have done to deserve all this bullying.
"...Heh?"

This Yuuto guy, he... he seriously just nominated her to be bait, too?! What kind of monster would dare suggest using her glorious, fluffy self as bait for anything! Was it jealousy driving them to say such blasphemous things?! Illusions or not, that was no excuse to... wait, her abilities weren't that strong, were they? No way she could make an illusion convincing enough to fool a ghost yet! The flustered fox in the midst of preparing a Nice Girl response that would rebuff the possibility of her abilities being of any use, when of course that little brat had to chime in as well.

"Er, that's..." while Asahi could indeed shapeshift, that was also quite limited as well; her current appearance was all she could really do in regards to looking human, so no altering her apparent age, either. Asahi hated that she couldn't tell if Tomoko was oblivious to her limitations, or knew full well and was taking way too much delight in teasing her. Vengeance was a top priority once this whole matter was settled.

"That, uh... won't quite be..." before Asahi could finish informing the group, Kaori had now approached, unnerving the fox. She found herself unconsciously trying to hold the frozen Mugi closer to her as a form of protection, when the suspicious spider spoke. No way anything good could come from letting this continue on! She opened her mouth to firmly protest, but her voice died into a confused whimper when she felt something constrict against her body. The material felt way too fine to be rope, but nonetheless worryingly sturdy.

The spider had ensnared her. This insane group were hell-bent on sacrificing her supremely fluffy and cuddly self to some strange internet-ghost, and she was powerless to stop them. All she could do was hold Mugi close and hope that being encased in ice would defend her from a terrible fate.
Human Village


Yuuka was not perturbed by the approaching laughter, nor the unnerving silence. She couldn't be much of a youkai if such basic scare tactics affected her. Even the sudden explosions weren't too surprising, though she found them immensely distasteful, given what was destroyed. This may be a false timeline or whatever, but that didn't mean the senseless destruction of those poor trees didn't annoy her a bit. Some disciplinary action was certainly in order.

"...I suppose so," Yuuka replied to Mokou with a sigh. The satori had already wandered off, as well, but at least she wasn't far. Probably. Keeping tabs on her exact location seemed futile, especially with this oppressive mist, but the likelihood of her leaving the village seemed almost nil. Of course, even if Yuuka were alone, she was confident that she could locate and punish the misbehaving little girls that were behind this.

"At any rate, our opponent should be here with us," Yuuka continued, "I'll be more than happy to atomise them. And you, Miss Immortal? Feel free to seek survivors before I level these buildings~"
Kishinami Hakuno


Caster's aide was most certainly welcome, her wind spell stalling the abductor for just a moment. Even as Hakuno tried to close the distance, the strange figure was able to slip away from the street, apparently retreating into an alley. Following his exact movements would have been difficult if he hadn't bumped into a few people, and while he should now be out of the way of too many bystanders, Hakuno didn't like the idea of following them into a space that could leave them disadvantageous. Unfortunately, the only option she could allow was to pursue, as long as that girl was in danger.

Thankfully, Benienma was already at her side. Hakuno pointed to the alleyway, leaving the full details for later, "it's a kidnapping! They went that way, Saber! Watch out, they seem to be hiding their presence somehow!"

Hakuno turned towards the beautiful Caster once more, trying to calmly decide the best course of action. She didn't like dragging members of the public into any kind of trouble, even if they were Servants, but a little girl was in trouble...

"Caster, can I ask you to assist us and support Saber?"

-----------------------

Berserker - "Guan Yu"


With the offered drink in hand, Berserker's cheeks were colouring rapidly colouring as she calmed down. That strange outburst had gotten her a strange look from her Master, and it seemed she had completely misread the situation in her surprise. Aaahhh, how embarrassing... but still, that totally could have been a valid interpretation of events! Like... her Master, having been awakened to the wonders of physical activity, felt the need to share her happin- nope, no more falling down that rabbit hole!

After roughly shaking her head, the Berserker was almost sulking as she averted her eyes, feeling the need to defend herself, "...I-I mean... ten miles is a warm-up... b-back home, it was..."
Comparing herself to her father and brothers, Berserker tended to completely fail to realise that, just because her family were even more superhuman in life, her ability to keep up with them said a lot about her own talents, leaving her perception of human ability slightly skewed as a Servant.

Taking a sip of the drink, Guan froze when the young man asked just how far they had gotten. Thinking back on the distance covered... well...

The Servant decided the best course of action was to continue drinking and avoid addressing the question altogether.

@PKMNB0Y@VitaVitaAR@Raineh Daze
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