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9 mos ago
Current Back from the dead. Braaaaiiiiinnnsss
3 yrs ago
I'm quitting Roleplayerguild due to personal issues. Apologies for inconvenience.


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Most Recent Posts

Sounds fun.
I'm a loner, and most of my social interaction is done online anyway, so I'm in the same boat.
Anyone alive?
We're now banned from leaving the house except for essential shopping, so yeah, Cabin Fever intensifies
Jack Thorne

"Would you excuse me a second?" Jack asked, standing up and heading out the back. For a while there was just the regular chatter before the sounds of screaming overpowered it. Those who knew dwarven were either blushing or impressed that someone knew so many swears. After thirty seconds, he re-entered the room, adjusting his hat, and returned to the table.

"That's better." Jack said, his face like a contented cat, "Apologies, I've had a few (dozen) bad experiences with ancient treasure maps. Things are buried for a reason." He lamented that he didn't have enough money for another beer, even if this stuff is weak as piss compared to back home.

"I'm not thrilled about it, but needs must. You have yourself a professional historian and artefact retrieval expert on board.
Question, does anyone here speak dwarven? Cuz Jack is about to go a cussing.
Jack Thorne

Jack looked at the noticeboard, then to his drink, and back to the noticeboard. Let's see, a new notice placed in by a mysterious knight and a short-eared dog. Probably something dangerous.

Opening his coinpurse, he could count his money with one hand. The bastards skimped out on paying as he apparently damaged the artifact by crushing it with a giant spider, which was a load of dragon dung. The thing was enchanted to be unbreakable, he'd checked using Identify. He may have been a tad upset, as he proceeded to beat the Rava-Loving hell out of them before dragging them to the higher ups of the Guild.

Turns out, they were wanted scam artists, known for tricking adventurers into obtaining artifacts, before claiming they damaged the artifact and refusing payment. Sadly, their bounty was mostly spent on paying fines for assault, even if it was warrented.

Deciding to chance things on this new mission, he got up to take a look. Aaaand it was feck'n bull. No details, just a promise of treasure? I mean, he liked exploring, but seriously this sounded more like a con. He decided to interrogate the knight.

"Okay, what's with the vaguery." Jack askes, sitting down at the Knight's table, "I need actual details about whatever this thing is before I just jump in headfirst. That kind of thinking gets people killed." He unconsciously rubbed his damaged left hand as he said that last part.
Felix Volpe

"Ah crud, it's the fuzz! Every man for himself!"

Felix darted towards the window, opening it before climbing out. It was fair to say Felix was not particularly in her good graces, especially after blowing up part of the chemistry lab with his and Raph's research. The woman was like a bloody battleaxe.

It was only when he was midway out the window that he remembered an important fact. The music room was on the second floor. Too late to abandon his current act, he gripped the side of the window and used it to launch himself towards the drain pipe. He initially missed, leading to a slight bonking of his head, but soon came to his senses and properly grabbed on.

Following that, he slid down the pipe to sweet, sweet freedom. As he walked away, he further examined the shard.

Return the part to the whole...

Cryptic voices in his head again. You know what, fuck it, he has more important things to worry about right now. It probably would be an idea to check it against a mirror, check it is actually part of one. Maybe should let the others tag along, especially that Devin guy. He's not a hardass for rules like Raph.
Right everyone, me and Jan have come up with a new rule for the RP.

If you do not reply within 3 days of the latest post, we will move on without your imput in the scene. There is an exception however, considering the busy lives everyone leads. If you require an extension, post in the IC to tell us so. This is mostly to check you haven't abandoned the RP.

Jack sat in the corner of the Silver Piglet, downing his (tenth) pint of beer. He was trying to drown out the absolute disaster of the last expedition. How the bloody hell did they miss that a rogue mage was active in the area?

Flashback - One Week Ago

You know, there are probably worse situations to be in than being hung upside down over a magically mutated spider monster, but in the moment other thoughts don't seem to come to mind. The only saving grace was that the one controlling the beast fell into the typical villain pitfall of monologuing.

What was it about these guys and monologues? I mean, here it was probably understandable, the crazed lunatic had probably not had any interaction with people for some time. That tends to happen when you breed spiders that eat people.

He had been caught unaware as he was exploring the temple. Apparently the Spider Mage Bittertooth had chosen to make the remote place his lair. He was completely overwhelmed by the organised arachnids and captured.

While Jack was thinking about this, and ignoring the monologue, he was working away at the spider silk keeping him trapped. Just a little more and... there.

"And furthermore, those League bastards who called me crazy will... WHAM" The Mage was interrupted by a flying kick to the face, courtesy of a now free catman.

"Sorry, but I'm not really in the mood to deal with the ravings of a lunatic."

The mage grabbed his jaw and pulled it back into place. "You dare injure the mighty Bittertooth? DEATHFANG, KILL HIM!"

Oh right, the giant spider. Jack completely forgot about that for a second. Summoning his Shadow Blade, he launched into combat with the monster. Despite the cutting power of his weapon, the creature's carapace was like steel. Fortunately the arachnomancer was merely cheerimg on his creation, so could be put out of mind.

The only real weak spot was the creature's eyes, but he would be damned if he was getting near that. After dodging for a solid minute, he decided to use a Chill Touch to at least partially blind the beast. In his mind, one of the lines from his studies came to mind.

"If you cannot break the stone, let it break itself."

Translation, use the enemies strengths against it. Jumping on the back of the spider, he grabbed it's head and forced it to charge to try and get him off. While he was at it, he finished the job of blinding the creature to put his plan into full effect. The arachnomancer saw what he was doing, but when he tried to heal the creature Chill Touch prevented it.

It took a couple of tries, and some major damage to the walls, but he finally managed to get the giant spider to crush its master. As he did so, the creature and it's brethren let out a sickening scream, as they began to fall apart. As Jack was on top of the giant spider, this naturally meant he got covered in the guts of it.

Even with Prestidigitation, it took five tries to remove the smell of spider guts from his clothing. Fortunately the rest of the mission was simple, and he retrieved the Cursed Blade Skulltaker. He also made a note to kick the arse of the region's scout for missing the fact that a bloody Raid Class threat was in the temple. If the creatures hadn't been linked to their creator, he'd have been in deep shit.
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